


Twist of the Kaleidoscope

by Mattiewilda



Category: Boy Meets World
Genre: Angela stands up for herself., Drama, Eric isn't stupid., Eventual Romance, F/M, Friendship, Shawn pays for his actions., season 6 AU, tension between friends
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-23 20:05:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 29
Words: 155,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14339952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mattiewilda/pseuds/Mattiewilda
Summary: Their friendship began when they separately sought refuge from the rest of their group and allowed preconceived opinions to fade away. In that friendship Eric and Angela have found peace and the ability to be themselves. How will the group handle it when their friendship is discovered? And what will they do if it leads to more? (AU. Set after season six's Santa's Little Helpers.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My two biggest pet peeves with Boy Meets World are 1) the stupid, infantile (but still funny) character that Eric became in the last season or two and 2) the rewriting of Shawn and Angela's breakup that happened in the beginning of season 7. Angela had a million and one reasons in season six to question Shawn's ability to commit to her but suddenly them being apart is her fault due to her never mentioned mother taking off on her? Always had a hard time buying that one myself. The way his issues and contributions to their break-up(s) were always swept under the rug bothered me. Angela always got the blame and the short end of the stick.

Angela had to lie to come here. That in itself was absurd and she knew it. She had to lie three times to three different people- Cory, Topanga, and Shawn- in order to get some privacy. Ever since Christmas, when Shawn listened as she declared her love for him only to kiss her and then say he couldn't commit, she had been lying more. She schemed more. She snuck around more. Twice in less than six months she'd had her heart broken and she was expected to be friends and play nice for the sake of others. Never mind that for the longest time she couldn't be around Shawn without feeling like she was being stabbed in the heart with a hot poker or that every word he said reminded her of a promise he made that she had been foolish enough to believe. Instead of being given space to deal with their break up she was confronted with it every day. Whenever she felt like she was making progress, that maybe she was starting to get over him, he would be right beside her telling her that maybe he was wrong, and maybe they could work it out...but not yet. Oh, no, he wasn't ready yet. He just wanted to be sure Angela was in the reserves waiting for him to make up his mind. Okay, maybe Shawn wasn't that callous, but it certainly seemed like he wanted it both ways sometimes. She couldn’t help but feel like he was using her as an emotional yo-yo and that yo-yo had hit the ground one too many times.

 

Then she had Cory and Topanga- interlopers at their best. Sure, they said they would respect her wishes and no longer try to force her and Shawn together romantically, but every time she turned around she was part of a foursome, being dragged along to activities like things had never changed. Angela went along with it for a while. Why cause trouble? She can still see their faces the day she decided to stop going along with it. Cory and Topanga wanted to go see the latest romantic comedy and suggested she and Shawn come along. She had been honest and said she just didn't feel up to it. She even suggested Shawn might have more fun bringing an actual date along. One would think she suggested they throw puppies on the highway during rush hour traffic the way they reacted. After that Angela decided it would just be easier to lie.

 

So, here she was, alone on a Friday night wandering around the museum in an exhibit on American Landscape. She’d never considered herself a huge fan of the genre, but there was something charming about the photos. She stopped when she came across a black and white picture of a church down a dirt road. The sun was shining, but it looked sad.

 

"Wedding or funeral?" There was a pause. "I think there's a wedding going on in that church."

 

She hadn’t heard anyone come up behind her. "Are you kidding me? That is clearly the road to a funeral. Don't you see how desolate and..." Angela trailed off when she looked back and saw who her company was. "Eric? What are you doing here? Did Cory have you sniff one of my shirts to track me down?"

 

"What are you talking about?"

 

Angela shook her head, knowing anything else she said would only make her sound paranoid- though she wouldn’t put it past Cory to sic Eric on her trail like one of those drug sniffing police dogs. "Nothing."

 

"I'm here to see this exhibit,” he explained. “I've been looking forward to it for months."

 

"So, you're not following me?"

 

"Why would I be following you?"

 

"Why else would you be in a museum?"

 

"I like art," he said slowly, clearly annunciating each word. He momentarily wondered if he should’ve walked the other way when he saw her.

 

"Oh." Angela turned her attention back to the photograph in front of them. "Really, though, a wedding? Does anything about this scream love and happiness to you?"

 

"You're just not looking at it from the right angle." Eric stepped closer to the picture. "It's not a normal wedding. I think we're seeing it from the perspective of two people running off to elope. It seems isolated and lonely to us, but to them it's the only way they can be together. It's freedom. What's not beautiful and hopeful about that?" After she didn't respond to his interpretation he turned around and found her staring at him with an odd look on her face. "Something wrong?"

 

"Who are you?"

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"You look like Eric and you sound like Eric, but the words coming out of your mouth are so not Eric."

 

He averted his eyes and instead focused on a photo across the gallery. "What do you mean?"

 

"Come on, the Eric I normally see would need to be attached to one of those toddler harnesses to make sure he didn't go through the protective glass. He wouldn’t be offering up philosophical interpretations of artwork."

 

"You have to give the people what they want."

 

"Huh?"

 

"What do you think of this one," he asked, moving on to another picture. "Now the sand dunes, these look lonely and desolate."

 

"I think they're beautiful. They look like the last place one can truly be alone in the world."

 

"Why would you want to be alone in the world?"

 

"To be at peace."

 

"I think if you need to escape to dunes to find peace you must not be hanging around with the right kind of people."

 

"Maybe," Angela conceded.

 

"Cory starting to get to you?"

 

"He means well."

 

"That doesn't make it okay. He and Topanga shouldn't keep trying to force you and Shawn together if it's not what you want."

 

“How the hell do you know about that?”

 

“I see all,” he said with a wink.

 

“What does that even mean? Do I need to get a restraining order against you or something?”

 

“I’m not a stalker.”

 

“Sorry, when someone says they see everything…”

 

“Your mind jumps to a crazy place?”

 

“You’d know a lot about that, wouldn’t you?”

 

“What?”

 

Angela shook her head. “How about we look at the next picture?”

 

“Great.”

 

For the next couple hours they wandered the exhibit, each offering their own interpretations of the pictures. She honestly couldn’t believe all of the insights and thoughtful commentary coming from Eric. Not that she knew him very well, she realized. They hardly ever spent any time together. Most of what she knew came from things Cory, Topanga, and Shawn would mention. Angela figured at best he was silly and immature and at worst someone bordering on insanity. How could this guy and the goofy nutcase others talked about be one in the same? It didn’t make any sense. The Eric standing in front of her was so normal, so interesting. She could have a conversation with this guy. She’d be friends with him.

 

“Wow, that’s something, huh?”

 

Angela looked at the picture Eric had stopped in front of. It was trees along the edge of a river and the fall colors were reflected in the water. It was absolutely breathtaking. “It’s beautiful.”

 

“It reminds me of camping. If you go in late September or early October it looks like that. It’s like you’re in your own little world- just you and nature.”

 

She was going to make a joke about how he seemed to always be in his own world but stopped herself. He was being so sincere. “That sounds nice.”

 

“Have you ever been camping?”

 

“You mean like out in the wild, sleep in a tent, catch your food, and nature is your bathroom type of camping?” He nodded. “No. The closest I ever got was spending Christmas in a cabin with my parents. I think I was seven. We made s’mores in the fireplace.” That was probably the best Christmas Angela could ever remember having. She loved it when she got to be alone with her parents without work and travels to get in the way.

 

“That sounds nice. Your dad’s in the military, right?”

 

“He’s a master sergeant in the army. I hardly ever get to see him.” She sighed sadly. “I miss him a lot.”

 

“Is your mom in the military, too?” Eric noticed her tense up before she moved on to a picture across gallery. “Did I say something wrong,” he asked, trailing behind.

 

“No, no, you’re fine. I’d just really rather not discuss her. The less said the better.”  

 

“Sorry. What’s your dad like?”

 

She smiled. “He’s a great guy. He likes to think he’s tough and intimidating, and I guess he is to people who don’t know him, but he’s so not that guy with me. Everyone else sees the grizzly bear and I get the teddy bear.  I call him up to say hi and he’s asking how much money I want or if there’s anything I need him to buy me.”

 

“That’s a nice deal.”

 

“Maybe, but I’d trade all of that if it meant I got to see him more often. I’d jump at the chance to spend more time with him.” Angela wondered why she was talking about her dad with Eric. She was pretty tight-lipped about her family circumstances, rarely brought it up with Topanga or even with Shawn when they were together. She didn’t want to be labeled as the poor girl with the MIA workaholic father and a mother who walked out on her. She refused to let their actions define her.

 

Eric tried to imagine going long periods of time without seeing his parents and couldn’t. “Yeah, I guess I’m lucky there.”

 

“You are. Don’t ever take it for granted.” She took in the image in front of her- a waterfall carefully nestled between some rocks flowing down into a stream. “I’m supposed to see my dad during Spring break. He swears he won’t let anything postpone this visit, but he’d made that promise before.” She crossed her arms. “When the military says jump he can’t help but automatically ask how high- even if it means he jumps over me in the process.”

 

“How long has it been since you’ve seen him?”

 

“We spent a few weeks together last summer after I graduated. That was about seven months ago.”

 

“That’s a long time.”

 

“It is.” Angela was ready to talk about something else. She didn’t like to dwell on her family for too long. “So, is there anything interesting going on in your life?” It was a lame question, but she couldn’t think of anything else to ask him about. She simply didn’t know Eric very well. She didn’t know him at all. The little she thought she knew had gone out the window after tonight.

 

He was momentarily thrown by the subject change, but didn’t challenge it. “Do you remember when I was the mall Santa for Christmas?”

 

“Vaguely.” Christmas, in her mind, signified the last nail in the coffin between her and Shawn. She remembered little else from the holidays.

 

“After meeting all those kids from the orphanage and seeing how happy they were with so little- one girl was thrilled with an empty bag if you can believe that- I decided I wanted to do more. I finished my background check and interviews last week and this morning I got the call that I was approved to be a big brother.”

 

“Eric, that’s great.”

 

“I’m hoping I can be matched up with Tommy, but they haven’t assigned anyone to me yet.”

 

“Who’s Tommy?”

 

“The little boy I brought back to my parents’ house for Christmas.” He noted her blank stare. “He has red hair and was holding a fire truck.”

 

She shook her head. “Sorry, I was a little preoccupied at Christmas.”

 

“Oh, well, when I was Santa he said all he wanted for Christmas was parents. I felt really bad that I couldn’t give him that, but I knew I could at least give him Christmas with a family. After that I couldn’t get him out of my mind- actually I kept thinking about all of the kids. I had to find another way to help. Just giving one kid one day of happiness didn’t feel like enough.”

 

“That’s so sweet.”

 

He shrugged. “It’s the least I can do.” They both looked up when an announcement came over the P.A. system letting them know that the museum would be closing in ten minutes. “Wow, okay, tonight went by pretty fast.”

 

Angela checked her watch and couldn’t believe how long they’d been here. It hadn’t felt like a few hours went by. “I know.” They stood there, staring awkwardly for a moment. “I guess we should get going. I need to catch the bus.”

 

“I’ll give you a ride.”

 

“Oh, no, Eric, you really don’t have to do that.”

 

“It’s no problem. I have to pass the campus on the way back to my apartment anyway. It’s not out of the way.”

 

What are the odds he’d morph back into weird during a quick drive? “Okay.”

 

“Great, we can get some dinner. I was thinking either burgers or Chinese, but you can pick.”

 

She stopped in her tracks. “Whoa, wait a minute, dinner?”

 

“Yeah, you know- food that is eaten in the evenings? I haven’t had dinner yet and- unless you snuck food in your purse despite all the no food signs in big, bold print- you haven’t either.”

 

“You want to get dinner…with me?”

 

“I think I made that clear.” He shrugged. “We have to eat, right?”

 

“And we’d go together?”

 

“We can sit at different tables if you want, but it would make having a conversation really difficult.” He took a few steps back. Eric didn’t know why she was being so standoffish all of a sudden. He thought they’d been having a nice time. True, it was probably the first time they’ve ever had a real conversation, but it seemed to go well. “If you don’t want to go, just say so. You won’t hurt my feelings. It’s just two friends getting dinner.”

 

That’s right, it was just dinner. It was just dinner with Eric. And he’d been relatively normal all evening with no indication he would flip back like a switch. Of course, when they first ran into each other she’d had no idea he wouldn’t be the silly person she usually encountered. What a minute…what did he call them? “We’re friends?” For a moment she had flashes of Cory and his determination to become her new best friend. She didn’t know if she could take another Matthews chasing after her with flowers and balloons, waiting to talk when she gets out of the shower.

 

He shrugged. “We’re not strangers.”

 

That much was true. “You won’t stick chopsticks up your nose at the restaurant, will you?”

 

“Of course not,” he scoffed. “Do you have any idea how painful it is to have a splinter in your nose?” He shook his head. “It’s not worth it.”

 

/

 

A while later they were eating in a silence that wasn’t exactly comfortable but wasn’t awkward either. Every so often Eric would catch Angela shooting looks his way when she thought he wasn’t paying attention. He couldn’t quite read what she was thinking. It looked like disbelief, but he wasn’t sure. He hadn’t known how to react when he saw her at the museum. He had been looking forward to a night to himself where he didn’t have to be on, with no one expecting constantly outlandish behavior from him, and was momentarily afraid that had gone out the window. But he decided to take a chance and be himself. It’s not like he and Angela ever hung out together. She wouldn’t expect him to act a certain way. “What,” he asked after she tried to sneak another look. “Do I have food on my face?”

 

She looked back down to her own plate momentarily. “No, I’m sorry.”

 

“Then why do you keep looking at me? I know I’m attractive, but try to control yourself,” he said in a teasing manner.

 

She rolled her eyes and bit back a smile. “I just…I can’t figure you out.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“If you told me earlier today that we’d wind up at the museum together I would’ve envisioned the night ending with me trying to convince museum security that you meant no harm when you touched the priceless painting or broke the glass case and that they shouldn’t press charges.”

 

“But I didn’t touch anything.”

 

“That’s exactly my point.”

 

Eric wore a puzzled expression. “I think I need to buy a vowel because I don’t get it.”

 

“Who is the real Eric?” She decided it would be easier to cut right to the chase. “Is it the one who was at the museum tonight- the sweet, funny, intelligent guy who cares about people around him or is it the guy who steals tricycles from clowns and is surprised when they come and beat him up? Or the guy who set up hidden cameras in his apartment and filmed his roommates without their knowledge?”

 

“I’m curious about the human spirit,” he exclaimed before grimacing. The whole hidden camera _The Truman Show_ esque plot hadn’t been his best idea. “You knew about that?”

 

“Word got around.”

 

“At least Rachel no longer fears garbage disposals.” He wilted slightly under her glare. “Yeah, it was a crappy thing to do. But in my defense it was supposed to be a show about _me_. It just got out of hand. How was I supposed to know people would find a girl walking around half-dressed more interesting than me?”

 

“Seriously? Isn’t that like rule number one in the guy handbook?”

 

“They haven’t given me my copy yet so I don’t know. Probably.”

 

She took a sip of her soda. “So, which is it? Who is the man behind the curtain?”

 

“Who says there’s just one?”

 

“What?”

 

“It depends on my audience.”

 

Angela waited for him to elaborate, but he didn’t. “I don’t know what that means.”

 

“It means if people expect something you give it to them.”

 

“Let me see if I get this,” she began, trying to follow his logic, “you think people _want_ to see you acting crazy so you act crazy?”

 

“It’s what they expect.” He took a big bite of his egg roll, hoping to delay any further questions.

 

“Yes, but…only because it’s what you do. You act crazy because people expect it, but they only expect it because you do it.” This was some bizarre chicken or the egg game he was playing.

 

“Then they won’t be disappointed when I give it to them, will they?”

 

“That may be the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You’re not being you because you think people want you to act insane? You think they’ll be disappointed if you act any other way?”

 

“It’s no stupider than what you’re doing,” he fired back.

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“You’re letting Cory, Topanga, and Shawn dictate what you do and where you go. That’s stupid.”

 

“They don’t have control over me.”

 

“Really, because the study group you were supposedly meeting tonight must be full of invisible people because I didn’t see anyone else at the museum with you.”

 

Angela’s eyebrows shot up. “How did you know I said I was going to a study group tonight? What happened to not being a stalker?”

 

“I heard Cory whining to Topanga about trying to find a date for Shawn.”

 

“Oh.” It was her turn to cram food into her mouth in order to avoid more questions.

 

“Why lie?” After a few minutes she still hadn’t answered him. “I’m sorry. It’s none of my business.”

 

“They don’t want to hear the truth. I’m done with Shawn- I need to be done with him, at least romantically. He doesn’t want to see it and neither do Cory and Topanga.”

 

“You still love him though, right?”

 

“Well, yeah, I don’t think you ever completely stop with your first love, but I can’t do it anymore. I can’t be on this roller coaster where however Shawn’s feeling that day decides the status of our relationship.” She stabbed at her meal with a chop stick. “I was afraid of getting into an actual relationship with him at first because I never had one go past a few weeks, but once we decided to give it a try I was one-hundred percent committed to him. I never doubted for a second what we had. He’s the one who wanted to see what else was out there. He decided he wasn’t ready. And that’s fine, people break up and relationships end. Okay. But why don’t I deserve a clean break? What gives him the right to chase me and kiss me and write poetry about me and tell me he loves me but that he’s not ready for the commitment of being with me?”

 

“It’s not right. It’s kind of a jerky move actually.”

 

“And let’s say I got back together with him- what then? How long would it last before he changed his mind again? A week? A month?” Angela reached for a napkin and wiped her eyes, annoyed with herself for getting upset. “I can’t live with that uncertainty.”

 

Eric started to reach out for her hand, but stopped himself, not knowing if it would be appropriate. “No, I get it. If someone is going to promise to be there and love you then that’s what they should do. If he can’t do that he should let you go so you can find a guy who can.”

 

“I know Shawn’s had a rough life and has issues with his parents, but he’s not the only one. My dad has always put the army first and my mom took off on me, too, but you don’t see me using them as an excuse to push people away and manipulate them.” She took a deep breath. “Maybe that’s a harsh thing to say, and I’m sure he’s not doing it consciously, but emotionally I feel like one of those crash test dummies. No matter how wrecked I get, he and Cory keep trying to glue my head back on and load me back into the car for another drive.”

 

“Let me know if you ever need me to beat Cory up.”

 

She appreciated a reason to laugh. “What?”

 

“I’m his older brother. With that title comes with the inalienable right to pound the crap out of him when necessary.”

 

“Ah, is that what it means to be a brother?”

 

“It’s a huge plus.”

 

She shook her head and stared at the table. “Cory means well, he means really well…but his way of going about things…I don’t know. It’s like he has this very narrow view of the world and what will make him happy and if something doesn’t match up with the picture in his head…”

 

“He goes ballistic trying to fix it,” Eric concluded.

 

“Exactly. When he’s just being my friend he’s amazing, but lately he’s busy playing matchmaker. And when he’s in matchmaker mode it’s all I can do to stop myself from throttling him. ”

 

“Is Topanga as bad as Cory and Shawn?”

 

“Not usually. Most of the time she tries to respect my wishes and not force me with Shawn, but she also wants to see Shawn happy. And she has Cory whispering in her ear.” Angela grabbed a new napkin and began tearing it into little shreds. “They’re freaks who have been in love since the sandbox and sometimes they don’t understand any different.” She looked up when Eric laughed. “What’s so funny?”

 

He leaned forward as if he was about to let her in on some dirty little secret and whispered, “Cory and Topanga did _not_ fall in love in the sandbox. Or the monkey bars, or any place else involving a playground. They haven’t been in love since they were two.” He sat back in his chair and resumed talking at a normal volume. “I don’t care what they claim, it just didn’t happen that way.”

 

“Then how did it happen?”

 

“I don’t know, middle school, high school? Before that Cory thought girls had cooties and that Topanga was a little weirdo hippie girl who communicated with otherworldly creatures for answers in math class.” At least he thinks he remembers Cory and Shawn ranting about that once as kids. They had been pretty difficult to tune out at times.

 

_Otherworldly creatures?_ “I’m sorry, she what?”

 

“He dated girls before her. And again when they broke up a few times, and he even talked to that little ski bunny when they were together so…”

 

“I get the picture.”

 

“And I’m sure she dated before Cory and during their break-ups, too.”

 

“Why dress it up? Falling in love in your early teens and still being together in college despite bumps in the road is pretty great.”

 

“Let me tell you something about Cory and Topanga: they don’t just want to be viewed as a great couple. They want to be special. They need to be perfect, to see themselves as the standard every couple sets out to be.”

 

 “I’ve noticed.”

 

“I’m surprised they haven’t altered history so the story goes that they were in love before they were born and my mom and Mrs. Lawrence put their huge stomachs together so pre-Cory and pre-Topanga could have play dates.”

 

Angela shook her head in an attempt to rid herself of the mental image. “That would be weird.”

 

“Any weirder than rewriting their history to say they fell in love before they were potty-trained?”

 

“No.”

 

“You just gotta be like me.”

 

“Like you how?”

 

“Stop caring about what people think. You don’t want Shawn to keep stringing you along? Don’t let him. Get out there and start dating again. I’m sure the second word got out that you were available guys were knocking themselves over to ask you out.” Eric caught her look. “What? Sure, I don’t know you that well and you’re a little closed off, but you’re hot and must have tons of guys…”

 

“Closed off?! What is that supposed to mean? I am not closed off.” It wasn’t the first time she’s been told that and she hated it.

 

“All I meant was that you’re not the easiest person to get to know.”

 

“And you’re an open book?”

 

“I think so, yes.”

 

“Please, for all of your talk about not caring what people think you sure as hell seem to put a lot of stock in others’ opinions of you.”

 

“I do not. People can think whatever they want. It doesn’t mean anything to me.”

 

“Then how come you didn’t have an answer when I asked which Eric is the real Eric?”

 

“Why does there need to be only one? I happen to be a multifaceted human being.”

 

“You mean you’re a scared one.”

 

“I’m not…”

 

“The Eric I see in the student union wouldn’t know multifaceted was even a word, let alone know how to use it in a sentence. You say I’m closed off? Well, if I am I’m not the only one. The only difference is you’re more social and outgoing and hide it with a smile on your face.”

 

He leaned back in his chair and nervously ran his hands through his hair. “What am I scared of?”

 

“I don’t know you well enough to even begin to guess. If I had to throw a theory out there I’d say that you have a pretty good idea of who you are but you’re afraid that if you let people see that then they’ll reject you or something.” She took a deep breath. Things had gotten out of hand. They had been having a nice time until she snapped at him and appeared to have hurt his feelings. “Look…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bite your head off like that. I guess I got mad because you’re not the first person to say I’m closed off and I hate that label.

 

“I had to listen to various counselors at every school I was dragged to as a kid tell my dad the same thing. _‘Angela would rather read during lunch and recess instead of interacting with the other kids.’_ Or the ever popular, _‘Angela is hesitant to make a friend.’_ No one seemed to care how difficult it was. Maybe I didn’t go telling my life story to people I just met and prefer to keep things close to the vest until I knew them better, but so what? I moved around so much it was hard to make real friends. It seemed whenever I made one it was time to pack up and leave and start the whole process all over. It was hard being the new girl in class and I never stopped being the new girl.”

 

Eric didn’t know how to respond to that. He was able to stay in the same place, with pretty much the same group of people, his entire life. His family moved into their house before he started kindergarten and only traveled for the rare vacation or trip to a relative’s house. “I’m sorry.”

 

“I’m not looking for sympathy. As a kid I didn’t know any different and it was fun seeing so many places. I had more stamps in my passport by age five than most people will in their entire lives. Believe it or not I actually had a pretty good childhood. It was just lonely sometimes.”

 

“Did your mom get tired of the moves? Is that why she left?” He noticed she tensed up immediately at the mention of her mother. “Sorry…something else that isn’t my business.”

 

She waved him off. “It’s fine. I think she just got tired of her life in general…every part of it.”

 

“I’m sure she didn’t get tired of you.”

 

“If that were true she would’ve taken me with her, or at least she’d want to see me on occasion. I haven’t seen or heard from her in years.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“It is what it is and I can’t change anything. I’d rather move on and live my life the way I want.”

 

“And living the way you want means hiding out at the museum on a Friday night?”

 

Eric had her there. “Clearly things aren’t perfect but I’m working on it.”

 

“That offer to beat up Cory is good. I’ll even kick Shawn’s ass a little if you want.”

 

“But he’s not your brother. Therefore the inalienable right to justify it doesn’t exist.”

 

“Eh, I’ve lived with him on more than one occasion. That gives me some right.”

 

“I’ll let you know,” she said with a quiet laugh. “I suppose we should get the check.” Angela reached for her purse, but he stopped her. “What are you…”

 

“It’s on me.”

 

“Oh, you don’t have to…”

 

“I asked you to dinner so it’s my treat.”

 

She wanted to argue, but had a feeling she wouldn’t win. “Okay.”

 

“Besides, we’re not done yet. We haven’t opened our fortune cookies.” He gestured to the center of their table. “And look, they gave us extra so we each get two.”

 

She smiled at the excitement in his voice. It didn’t seem to take much to make him happy. “Does that mean double the good luck or double the bad?”

 

“It depends on what our fortunes say. You pick first.”

 

Angela grabbed a cookie and, after tearing the cellophane, broke open the cookie. She promptly doubled over with laughter. “ _It never pays to kick a skunk_.”

 

He laughed with her. “You don’t want to scare one either.”

 

“Please don’t tell me you know that based on personal experience.”

 

“Unfortunately.”

 

“Why would you scare a skunk?”

 

“It was sort of a mutual surprise thing. I spotted something by my back tire and when I went to check it out let’s just say I was the one who suffered.”

 

“I can imagine. Okay, it’s your turn.”

 

“ _Your shoes will make you happy today_.” Eric looked down at his feet. “My feet don’t hurt so I guess it’s true.”

 

Angela took her final cookie. “ _There is never a wrong time to make new friends_.”

 

“Now that is very true.” He picked up the last remaining cookie. “Let’s see if this fortune can beat shoes.” He tore it open. “ _A short stranger will soon enter your life with blessings to share._ What the hell does that mean? Should I be on the lookout for generous Oompa Loompas?"

 

"Maybe it means Tommy, or whatever child you end up being a big brother to," she suggested.

 

“Yeah, that makes more sense.”

 

“And if you ever come across any Oompa Loompas let me know so I can run the other way.”

 

“Aw, do they scare you?”

 

“No, I find little men with orange skin, green hair, and white eyebrows who sing in unison positively charming.”

 

“When you put it that way they do sound kind of creepy.”

 

“Kind of?”

 

“Fine, terrifying.” He signaled to the waiter for the check. “I suppose we should get going.”

 

“Do you mind if we stop for ice cream on the way? My treat.”

 

“You can’t just let me pay for dinner, can you?”

 

“I feel like some ice cream.”

 

“You should know I like two scoops with my waffle cone.”

 

/

 

A little while later they were leaving the ice cream shop. Though it was still winter it was pretty mild out and they decided to walk a bit before going back to the car. “I know you thought I was just joking around before,” Eric began, “but seriously, there’s got to be a ton of guys who have asked you out.”

 

“I don’t know about a ton.”

 

“But there have been a few?”

 

Angela averted her eyes. “There’s this guy, Ron, he’s in my history class. He’s asked me out a couple times.”

 

“And why haven’t we gone out with Ron yet,” he asked. “Is he an uggo?”

 

“What,” she said through giggles, “no! He’s very attractive.”

 

“Stupid, then?”

 

“No.”

 

“He’s not the professor, is he?” She gave him an incredulous stare. “I’ll take that as a no. So what’s the problem?”

 

“If I start dating again then…well, I’m dating again.” She kicked a rock down the sidewalk. “Dating and relationships haven’t been kind to me lately. I thought things with Shawn would be different, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. What if my next relationship ends just as bad, or worse?”

 

“What if you meet the love of your life and you’re together forever?”

 

“That’s a nice thought, but I wouldn’t place bets on that.”

 

“You never know when or where you’ll find love.”

 

“Can I ask you a question now?”

 

“Sure.”

 

“You like Rachel, right?”

 

“Um, hello, have you seen her?”

 

She rolled her eyes. “If you like her so much, why haven’t you taken the chance and asked her out?”

 

“First of all we live together and that makes things kind of blurry. And also,” he hesitated before continuing, “I think she likes Jack more.”

 

“What?” He said the last part so quietly she couldn’t hear him.

 

“I said I think she likes Jack.”

 

“Based on what?”

 

“I don’t know. It’s the vibe I get. She looks at him differently. She doesn’t look at me the same way,” he admitted sadly. In his continued quest to compete with Jack for Rachel’s affection he’d noticed little things, like the way she looked at him. Eric wasn’t even sure if she realized it yet, but he had.  It was just one of the many little things he’d picked up on between them lately. Something was going to happen there. It was only a matter of when.

 

“They could just be getting along as friends.”

 

“I don’t think so.”

 

“In that case it sounds like you need to get back out there dating, too.”

 

“My track record sucks just as bad as yours.” There were a few girls he had really liked, but no relationship stuck. They usually imploded within a month, two if he was lucky.

 

“Yeah, but what was it you said? You never know when or where you’ll find love.”

 

“It’s easier to give the advice than take it.”

 

“Tell me something I don’t know.” She looked at him as they approached the car. “Maybe it’s time we both break out of our comfort zones.”

 

“Maybe.”

 

/

 

/

 

“Hey.”

 

Topanga looked up from the magazine she was reading. “Hi. I was starting to get worried about you. It’s late.”

 

“Sorry.” Angela hung up her coat and set about gathering her belongings so she could brush her teeth and take a shower before going to bed.

 

“You missed a good movie.”

 

“I’ll catch it another time.”

 

She couldn’t help but notice her friend was being rather curt with her answers. “Are you mad at me?”

 

“I’m just tired, that’s all.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Yes, Topanga.”

 

“Where did you go tonight?”

 

“I told you I went to study group to prepare for the big test coming up in my Lit. class.”

 

She walked over with a notebook in her hands. “This girl named Breanne came by a little while ago to return your Lit. notes. She said you let her borrow them.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Come on, Angela, what’s going on?”

 

She sighed and sat down on her bed.  Even though she hadn’t been sneaking around and lying for long she was tired of it. Her candid evening with Eric had been refreshing. “I needed to get out of here for a while. I needed to get away from you, Cory, Shawn, and your latest matchmaking attempts.”

 

“I’m not trying to…”

 

“No.” She pointed at Topanga. “I’ve told you before I’m done with Shawn and I mean it. I’m not going to keep putting myself out there like some fool when he’s not ready or willing to do the same for me. I’m finished.”

 

There was finality in her tone that hadn’t been there before. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to force you back with Shawn.” It drove her crazy because she knew how much Shawn still loved Angela and she’d been trying to be a good friend and support him. Apparently she hadn’t been doing as good a job being a friend to the one she called her best friend.

 

“No? Then why have you been championing the double dates or “random” meetings almost as hard as Cory?”

 

She sat beside her. “I had this picture in my head of how college was going to be, you know? Me and Cory…you and Shawn…two young couples in love surviving their way through college together. I guess it’s hard to let go of that image.”

 

“You have to. You don’t have a choice. Me and Shawn are done.”

 

“Even as friends?”

 

“No-I don’t know, but whatever we will be is going to take time.”

 

“I just want you guys to be happy.”

 

“I’m not happy. I need you all to back the hell off.”

 

“How about the four of us get together to talk and…”

 

“No,” Angela interrupted, exasperated, “you’re not hearing me. There is no four of us, at least not the way it used to be and you need to accept that.”

 

“Okay, I swear. I’ll try.”

 

“And you’ll get Cory to chill?”

 

“I’m not a miracle worker,” she said with a chuckle, earning a small smile from her friend. “I’ll tell him it’s in his best interest to mind his business.”

 

“Tell him his physical safety depends upon it.”

 

“You’re going to beat him up?”

 

“Someone will.” She grabbed her robe. “I’m going to take a shower.”

 

“So where did you end up going tonight?”

 

“I was with Eric at the museum and then we grabbed Chinese food and ice cream.”

 

Topanga laughed and went back to her magazine. “Fine, don’t tell me.”

 

/

 

/

 

The next morning Angela headed for the student union. She needed some coffee if she was ever going to get any studying done for her test. She momentarily froze up when she spotted Cory, Shawn, and Topanga sitting on the couch. Jack was with them sitting in one of the chairs. She considered leaving once she received her ordered coffee and muffin, but walked over. “Hi, guys.”

 

Shawn was the first to speak up. “Hi, Angela.”

 

“You missed a great movie last night,” Cory told her. “Shawn said how much you would’ve liked it.” Topanga elbowed him in the ribs. “Ow! What’s the matter with you?”

 

“I’ll catch it some other time.”

 

Jack checked his watch. “Where’s Eric? We can’t sit here all day waiting for him to come make whatever announcement he has to make.”

 

“Eric has an announcement?”

 

“He says he’s finally found his purpose in life, whatever that means.”

 

“Rachel’s not here for it?”

 

“She has a Saturday class.”

 

Just there Eric popped his head in the door. “Cool you guys are here,” he said before disappearing again.

 

“Was he wearing a top hat?”

 

“I don’t know. I was too distracted by the bowtie.”

 

The door opened again and this time Eric came inside. He was indeed wearing a top hat along with a tuxedo and cape. “Ladies and gentleman, be prepared to be dazzled and amazed because I am…” he made a few awkward gestures with his hands. “…Eric the Great!” There was a popping noise and a banner dropped down from the ceiling that read _Eric the Great_. 

 

“How did you do that?”

 

“Isn’t it obvious, Jackie, I’m a magician. I’m devoting my life to magic and its mysterious ways.” He threw his hands up and confetti shot out of his sleeves. “Who wants to be my assistant?” Angela was staring at him and it was impossible to miss her disappointment.  “Would you like to be my lovely assistant?”

 

“I need to study.” She’d hoped after last night she would see more of that guy, but apparently he was going back to his status quo. “It’d be difficult to do so if you chopped me up inside of a box.”

 

He made a rose appear seemingly out of thin air and held it out to her. “What if I promise to put Cory in the box and make him disappear?”

 

“Hey!”

 

Angela accepted the rose. “That’s tempting, but I’m going to study.” It hadn’t been funny to watch him act crazy before and now that she saw the other side of him, the one she suspected was closer to the real Eric, it definitely wasn’t funny. “See you guys later.”

 

/

 

Once back in her dorm Angela fully intended to start her work immediately, but spotted an envelope on the desk with her name on it. She opened it and found a picture inside. It was a miniature of the sand dunes she and Eric looked at last night. She flipped it over to see if there was a message. There was.

 

_Now you can be at peace wherever you are._

She grabbed a tack and stuck it on her bulletin board.


	2. Chapter 2

"I know, dad. I miss you, too." Angela did her best not to cry as she listened to her father speak. Tears fixed nothing. "Yeah, that would be nice." She balanced the phone between her ear and shoulder and hauled her suitcase onto her bed and worked on getting the zipper undone. "What? No, I'm fine. I was just really looking forward to seeing you, that's all. What can we do? It's not like we can control the weather, right? I know. I love you, too, daddy. Bye."

Once hanging up with her father, she dropped the phone onto her bed, not caring when it bounced to the floor. She'd really been looking forward to getting away and spending Spring Break with her dad. It wasn’t the ideal trip for most college freshman, but Angela had been counting down the days. And now, an hour before she was supposed to head to the airport, her flight was canceled. Thousands of flights were being preemptively canceled in anticipation of bad weather. 

"Hey, buddy!"

She looked up when her door flew open and Eric appeared, but said nothing. 

"Your chauffeur to the airport is here. But first," he said, pulling a paper out from behind his back, "check this out. You know that English paper you helped me with? B+, baby!"

“That’s great, Eric, congratulations.” She tried to be enthusiastic. He’d worked hard on that paper. But her heart just wasn’t in it. 

“What’s the matter? Why do you-“ He stopped talking when he realized that she wasn’t packing her suitcase like he originally thought when he came to her room. Her back was to him, but he could see she was taking everything out of her bag. “Call me crazy, but that’s the opposite of packing.”

“I’m not going.”

“Why not? Aw, man, your dad didn’t have something military-related that came up at the last minute, did he?” Angela had said in the past that her father always put the military first, even when he didn’t want to. It was almost a reflex for him at this point.

“It’s the stupid weather.” She was close to crying so she was keeping her answers short.

“First of all weather is not stupid. We’ve been over this. And second, it’s fine out, just a little cloudy.”

“Apparently there is this massive storm out west that is about to hit my dad’s area and then effect a good chunk of the east coast once it moves on. They’re cancelling flights left and right in anticipation.”

“That’s not fair to you.”

“I tried to get an earlier flight, but everything was booked up.” She picked up the closest object- a text book- and threw it across the room, hitting the wall. “I really needed this. I needed to see my dad. It’s been almost a year.”

“Nice arm. The football team could use your help. Their quarterback sucks.” He picked up the fallen book and set it on the desk. “Who knew a physics book could fly like that? I wonder if it followed all the proper laws of physics.”

“I’m not in the mood for jokes right now.”

“I’m sorry. You want to get a burger?”

“No.” 

He took a seat on Topanga’s bed and watched Angela empty her suitcase. “You want to go to the history museum? The exhibit on ancient Egypt is supposed to be amazing. Plus, you know- mummies are cool.” Ever since they discovered their mutual love of museums they would go together. “Or the planetarium is having something about the history of telescopes. There’s supposed to be one that’s like four hundred years old. Rumor has it we can even play around with some lenses. That sounds like fun, huh?” 

Neither of them had expected their accidental run-in at the museum to become a regular thing, but over the past couple of months it had. Eric made the first move, so to speak. He invited her to this old prison that had been converted into a museum and was rumored to be haunted. He had always wanted to see it, but was too scared to go alone. Angela almost said no. After all, he had reverted back to his wacky behavior after their first museum encounter and while it was obnoxious before, knowing it was an act made it worse. Still she was curious to see which Eric would show up if she accepted his invitation. Much to her relief the Eric she saw was the same guy at the art museum; the sweet, intelligent, funny guy who enjoyed coming up with philosophical interpretations and downright outlandish guesses on the meanings of abstract pieces.

It became a near weekly thing without them realizing it. They took turns picking the exhibits and buying the tickets. Then they’d go to lunch or dinner to discuss what they saw. Neither of them had Friday classes so it was only natural to go then. Angela didn’t have to answer a million questions from Cory and Shawn because they had class and if Topanga asked where she was she never believed her when she said she was with Eric anyway. 

She even offered to give him a hand with his homework. While Eric had great ideas, organizing his thoughts to get them onto the page was a challenge. She helped him break things down and make sense of the jumble of words in his head. His grades had been on a definite upswing lately. It was refreshing to be around someone who wasn’t expecting him to be a buffoon. And Angela definitely seemed to be more relaxed and was opening up to him, too.

Museums and homework weren’t the only things that had been throwing them together lately.

Chet Hunter blew into town and before he could blow out again he dropped dead of a heart attack. They tried to be good friends and help Shawn and Jack respectively, but Shawn completely misunderstood her attempt to console him as her wanting to get back together. Eric tried to be there for Jack, but he seemed more comfortable talking to Rachel and after walking in on them making out Eric didn’t push the issue. He felt bad for not being a better friend, but found it difficult to face his roommates ever since and did whatever could to not be home at the same time they were.

Not long after that Joshua was born six weeks premature and for a while no one knew if he would make it. Eric hung around with Tommy more and stayed optimistic not only for the kid’s sake, but to cut tension and make everyone smile during the long hours spent in the waiting room. He wanted to give people a distraction. If that involved him being threatened by an orderly or chased by the clown entertaining in pediatrics, so be it. It wasn’t until one Friday afternoon, standing before Picasso’s Mother and Child that he broke down and admitted to Angela how scared he was.

And then Tommy was adopted. While Eric knew it was for the best, he hated to see the boy go. He’d already made plans for things to do over spring break and the following summer that weren’t going to happen now. And stupid though it may have been there was a small part of him that hoped one day he’d be able to adopt Tommy.

“I know it’s your turn to pick and pay,” Eric continued, “but this one will be on me. You pick and I’ll pay. Consider it a thank you for helping me with the paper.”

“No- I mean, thank you for the offer, I appreciate it, but I think I’m just going to stay in tonight and wallow.”

“But you’ll only end up feeling worse than you do right now.”

“That’s the point.”

“I don’t want you spending your whole break moping around.”

“I won’t. I just need a day or two.”

Eric wasn’t convinced. “That sounds really depressing. Why do that to yourself?”

“Because it works for me. I give myself a couple days to be miserable and then I move on with my life.” She saw his skeptical look. “I’ll be fine. I’ll keep busy. Topanga has plans of crashing a few more weddings to get ideas. I’m sure I’ll get roped into that.”

“And spending time with Shawn and Cory is what you want to do?”

She rolled her eyes, but knew he had a point. Shawn was becoming relentless in his attempts to get back together with her. Angela held strong in her stance of strictly being his friend. He was simply too unstable for her to depend on for more than that. She couldn’t be with someone who claimed to love her in one breath and broke her heart in the next. “I admit it’s not ideal, but…” She stopped talking, startled when Eric jumped to his feet.

“Do you trust me?”

“What?” She’d swear she could practically see the light bulb that went off over his head.

“Do you trust me,” he repeated.

“I…yes. I think.” 

“Then pack your bags again and be ready to leave in an hour. No questions.” This was a great idea, maybe one of his best. If there was a good idea hall of fame, this would win the Nobel Prize for thoughts. “I’ll be back.”

“But, Eric, what are you-“

“Ah, ah, no questions.” He picked up the pile of clothes on the bed and handed it to her. “One hour.”

Blindly follow along with what Eric wanted or spend her Spring break as part of a foursome while fending off Shawn’s attempts to reunite- how did those become her vacation options? Still, she was intrigued. When it was just the two of them he was fine. He only ramped up the craziness when others were around. “Okay. One hour.” What was the worst that could happen?

“Yay,” he cheered. “You won’t regret it. I promise.”

/

/

Amy was in the middle of preparing dinner when Eric came bursting through the back door. "Hi, honey."

"Can't talk now, mom." He made a beeline for the drawers and opened them at random, digging around. 

"Eric?" No response. "Eric, what are you looking for?"

"You know all those road maps dad has?"

"Yes, I'm well aware." He was by now throwing things onto the floor. "Hey, hey, my kitchen! What are you doing?"

"I already told you: maps."

"If only you had a map for the maps, right,” Morgan remarked with a smirk.

"Can it, weasel."

“Let me guess, you’ve finally decided you miss your mind and are hoping a map will lead you to it?” She ducked the roll of paper towels that went flying at her. “Mom!”

“Eric, don’t throw things at your sister.”

“But she-“

“Morgan, be nice to your brother.” She dropped the aluminum foil onto the counter. “How do I still have to tell you these things? You’re both beyond old enough to know better. Oh, and if either one of you wakes Joshua from his nap there will be hell to pay.” Her surprise, miracle child was just a couple months old and still learning that sleep was good, not evil. 

“I just need the maps and then I’m outta here.”

“Where are you going?”

“Spring break, mom,” he said, as if that answered everything.

“Oh, please don’t tell me you’re going to Florida and have those Spring breaks like they show on TV. Eric, I know you’re out on your own and can make your own decisions, but please. That’s just full of people making bad decisions and you’ve been doing so well-“

“Mom, relax. I’m not going to Florida. I’m just…I’m helping out a friend. They were supposed to fly out tonight visit with their dad, but flights were canceled early ahead of a storm. I’m giving them a ride.” 

“Who is this friend?”

“That doesn’t matter. All I’ll say is that you know and like them.” The fewer details the better. He didn’t want Cory, Shawn, and Topanga to find out and put a kink in his plan…or worse, try to tag along. Angela wasn’t just going to see her dad. She was getting away from everything.

“So, flights are canceled because of a storm, but you’re going to drive in it?”

“I watched the Weather Channel and if we leave soon we should be at our destination before it hits.”

“Can’t you give me some information? What if something goes wrong and you need to-“

“Man, what a day” Alan exclaimed as he entered through the back door. “People were buying up boating supplies like crazy.”

“Did you remember to get the butter, milk, and diaper rash cream?”

He placed the bag on the counter. “Of course.” 

Morgan grimaced. “Mom, please don’t mix up the butter and diaper rash cream in dinner, tonight.”

“Why would I do that?”

“The other night you put baby oil in the food when you should’ve added olive oil.”

“I’m sleep-deprived, young lady. You know, you can always be a helpful daughter and volunteer to make dinner every once in a while. I was about your age when I started to cook.”

“But-“

Eric waived a bunch of papers around. “Hello? Is any of this helping me find a map?”

Alan just now realized his eldest was here. “What are you doing here? Did you make that mess?”

“I’m going on a little trip and thought it would be nice to know where I’m going. I’m looking for your maps.”

“Third drawer on the right,” he said, pointing. “When were you going to tell me about this trip? You said you’d give me a hand at the store during your break.”

“Sorry, dad, but something came up. A friend needs my help.”

“What kind of help and which friend?”

“A good friend needs to see her dad…I mean her dad…I mean their…oh, screw it.” He sighed. “This friend was supposed to fly out tonight but her flight was canceled. I’m hoping if we leave tonight we can beat the storms there.”

“Well, where are you-“

“You know, I’m technically a grown up and I don’t even live here anymore. I don’t have to tell you anything. So there.” He stuck out his tongue at his parents.

“You do if you want my maps and my car.”

“Dad, I have a car.”

“You can’t take that piece of junk on a long road trip.”

“Hey, don’t go knocking my Lucille. She’s a fine mode of transportation.”

“Do you still have to start the car with a screwdriver?”

“Yeah.”

“Then I don’t want you taking it, especially if there’s bad weather.”

“But…”

Alan placed the keys in his son’s hand. “I’ll feel better if you’re in my car. Come out to the garage with me. I’ll take out Josh’s car seat and other random crap.”

Eric took the maps he’d need from the drawer before following. “Okay.”

A few minutes later Eric was getting ready to drive off. “Thanks for the car, dad. I promise I’ll bring it back with the tank full.”

“And no dents?”

“Eh, we’ll see.”

“Eric…”

“Joking, dad, just joking. I’m a good driver.”

That was true. Despite all of his goofiness and recent insanity, Alan has never had to worry about his son’s driving ability. “When do you think you’ll be back? A day or two?”

“I was thinking more like a week or two.”

“Oh, so you’re not just dropping off this friend? You’re hanging around with her and her dad?”

“No, I figured I’d drop Angela off and then drive around, see some sights. Then I’ll pick her up and we’ll come back. I can take my car if it’s a problem.”

He could tell Eric had no idea he’d used Angela’s name, so Alan wasn’t going to say anything. He’d fill Amy in later. “No, take my car. Like I said, I’d feel better knowing you’re driving a car you can actually start with a key and has airbags.”

“Thanks, dad. I should go if we want to beat the storm.”

He pulled his wallet out of his pocket and opened it. He handed the money over. “Here.”

“I don’t need your money.”

“Emergency gas money.”

Eric did a quick count of the cash in his hand. “Am I buying gas for every car I pass, too?”

“This is another one of those, ‘Giving this to you will make me feel better,’ things.”

“All right. See you in a couple weeks.”

“Wait, just one more thing, I recently got this prototype into the store, but haven’t had a chance to use it too much yet.” Alan took a box out of the trunk.

“What is it?”

“It’s called a GPS: Global Positioning System. The military has been using it for years, but they’re only just becoming available to the public now.”

“What does it do?”

“You plug your destination into the computer and it will tell you how to get there.”

“Wow, so like a map on a computer?”

“Yeah, kind of. Still take the real maps with you just in case it malfunctions or you’re in an area without a strong signal, but this should make it a little easier to find your way, especially at night.”

“Cool.”

“Oh, and if it tells you to turn left but all that is to your left is a pond or a field: use common sense. Don’t drive into the pond.”

He pretended to think it over. “Driving into bodies of water is bad, thanks for the important safety tip, dad.”

/

/

“Sure, I’ll have a great time over Spring break with all this homework,” Topanga muttered to herself. She dropped her books onto her bed. “It’s not like I have a wedding to plan or anything.”

“Topanga, you okay?”

“Ah!” She jumped, not expecting to see Angela. “You scared the heck out of me!”

“Sorry. Which professor stuck you with homework?”

“I have to write a paper for my philosophy class.”

“One paper doesn’t sound so bad.”

“Except I don’t want to write a twenty-five hundred word essay on…” She trailed off.

“On what?”

“I never looked at the scrap of paper Professor Langley gave me with my topic.” She searched through her bag until she came across the crumpled up piece of yellow paper that had obviously come from a legal pad. “Are you kidding me?”

“What?”

“Are there unwavering moral principles that are right for all of the people all of the time? Yes or no. Provide a convincing argument for your chosen position.” 

“Yikes, glad I’m not you.”

“Thanks a lot. You’ll help me out with it, right? You are the writer.” She looked around the room and noticed Angela’s bags. It occurred to her that her friend was already supposed to be long gone to see her dad. They’d said their good-byes this morning. “Wait a minute, what are you doing here?”

“It’s my dorm, too.”

“No, that’s not what I mean. I thought you’d be gone for the airport by now.”

“That was the plan until my flight was canceled because of storms heading for my dad’s location.”

“Oh, no, but you were looking forward to it so much. It’s been so long since you’ve see him.”

“Mother Nature apparently doesn’t care about that.”

She took a seat beside Angela on her bed and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “I’m sorry.”

“Thanks.”

“But don’t worry, you won’t have a chance to be bored, or sad, and missing your dad. I’ve already picked three weddings to stake out.”

Angela suppressed a sigh. “We’ll see. I’ve got homework, too, and Mr. Feeny said he might be able to get me some work at a bookstore that his friend owns. It’s mostly inventory and clerical work, but it’s money and I’ll be working with books.” It wasn’t exactly a lie. Mr. Feeny had talked to her about a job at his friend’s bookstore, but it was for over the summer. “I promise I’ll keep a day or two free so we can have a girl time.”

“I guess I can live with that. I was going to catch a movie with Cory before I start to tackle my paper. You want to come? Shawn’s doing something with Jack so it would be the three of us.”

“No, you go. I’ll be fine.”

“I’ll bring you back some Sno-caps.”

“Thanks.”

Topanga gave her best friend a tight hug. Things had been a little weird between them lately and she knew it had more to do with Cory and Shawn than anything between the two of them, but she missed her friend. “Are we okay?”

“We’re fine. I’m just tired of…of everything. And I was really looking forward to seeing my dad. It’s been nearly a year. I miss him.”

“I’m sorry. Hopefully you guys will be able to figure something out when the weather clears up.”

“Maybe.”

“I should go. You know how Cory is about getting to the theater ahead of time.”

She chuckled. “He needs time to get there, order his snacks, watch the previews, and leave enough time before the movie starts to run to the bathroom. Oh, and don’t forget about staying until all the credits are over in case they toss in a funny bit and wanting to watch the next movie’s previews just to be sure he didn’t miss one.”

“Ugh, I’m trying to block last ones those out.” She gave Angela one last squeeze before heading for the door. “We’ll talk more when I get back. Maybe we can give each other mani-pedis?”

“Sounds great,” was all she said.

“You’re not going to spend all day in here alone, are you?”

“No. Eric will be here in ten minutes. Maybe we’ll hang out and do something.”

Topanga shook her head and laughed. Whenever she didn’t want to give a direct answer to where she had been, she’d say she was with Eric. Angela and Eric hanging out: that would be a sight. They had nothing in common and had never hung out outside of the group. There was no reason for them to. “I swear that joke never gets old.”

She frowned, no longer able to find the humor in the supposed joke. “Have fun watching the previews.”

/

/

“So what is this big plan of yours’?” She and Eric had just finished loading her luggage into the trunk and she couldn’t help but notice he’d brought a few bags as well. “And why does it involve your dad’s car?”

“Guess.”

“I have no…oh! We’re going up to New York to check out the Picasso exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, right? You mentioned you wanted to see that. Would you mind if we also checked out the New York Public Library while we’re there? I’ve always wanted to go. I know you’re not a library person, but-”

“Angela, we’re not going to New York,” he said, making a mental note to pay a visit to that library one day.

“Then where are we going?”

“I’m taking you to see your dad.” Eric thought about keeping it a secret, but knew he wouldn’t be able to make the entire thirteen hour drive without spilling the beans.

“You’re what?”

“We’re taking a road trip and your dad is destination numero uno.”

She gaped at him. “Are you serious?”

“What do you think?”

“Eric that’s so…I can’t believe…” She moved to hug him, but pulled back at the last second. “No, wait, it’s very sweet, but I can’t ask you to do that. I appreciate it and…”

“You’re not asking me. I’m offering. I want to take you. I know how much you miss your dad.”

“But why- why are you doing this?”

“We’re friends. Do I need another reason?”

It had been a long time since Angela was so happy she cried. Actually, she doesn’t know if that had ever happened for her. But she was very tempted now. She was doing so much blinking it felt like she was giving off messages in Morse code in an effort to keep her tears at bay. “I don’t want you to waste your vacation shuttling me across the country.”

“I’m not wasting anything. I want to do this for you. Maybe you can do something for me in return.”

Her eyes narrowed. There was always a catch. “What?”

“Let me. Did you ever think that I need to get away, too? These past few weeks have been weird. Jack and Rachel are together and in full coupley-ness-“

“That’s not a word.”

“There’s no other way to describe them. And with Tommy being adopted I don’t know what to do with myself. I’d made all these plans for the time we were going to spend together, but now…well…”

“I’m sorry.”

“I got a picture from him the other day.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, he drew him and his dog playing in the pool. I was in the picture, too, flying an airplane over their house to visit.” He cleared his throat. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for him that he’s got a home and a family. That’s great and he deserves it. But I still miss him.”

There was no hesitation when Angela hugged him this time. “Okay, I’ll let you drive me.”

“Thanks,” he quietly replied, hugging her in return. “Can we stop and pick up road trip junk food?”

“Sure.”

“Will you play car games with me?”

“That depends on the game, but yes.”

“Can I-“

“Eric, Angela , what are you up to?”

They jumped apart at the sound of Mr. Feeny’s voice. He and Dean Bolander were exiting his car. “Hi, Mr. Feeny. I hate to disappoint you, but I’m not going to be able to come over for dinner tomorrow night.”

“You were coming over for dinner tomorrow night?” This was news to the educator.

“Duh, it’s spaghetti night.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Eric.”

“Getting old sucks, huh? But don’t worry, since I can’t make it maybe the Dean wants to come over for spaghetti night.”

“There’s no such thing as spaghetti night!”

He leaned in and whispered loudly. “I’m trying to help you. Invite her. Take the reins.”

“I’d love to come over for spaghetti night,” Lila responded with a smile. “That is, if someone invites me.”

Eric nudged his mentor in the ribs. “This is not a drill. You are staring at the business end of a date. Ask her, man.”

She could see her colleague was growing weary and a little embarrassed by the conversation and decided to change the subject. “That’s an awful lot of luggage. Are you going on a trip?”

“I’m going to see my dad over Spring break.”

“Yeah, and if we’re going to make good time we should probably head out now.” 

“Right. See you after break.” Angela gave a brief wave before hopping into the passenger seat.

“You’re driving Angela,” Mr. Feeny questioned Eric. 

“What are friends for?” He slid across the hood to the driver’s side. “Hasta la vista, Feeny. And I want all the details on your spaghetti date night with the Dean.”

George and Lila watched the car peel out of the parking lot. “I didn’t realize Eric and Angela were an item,” she said.

“I don’t believe they are. I think Shawn is still trying to get Angela back and Eric likes…” He shook his head, almost disgusted with himself. “Great, how did I get wrapped up in their drama?”

“You’re a caring teacher who’s involved in the lives of his students. That’s a good thing, George.”

“Thank you.”

“Do you know what else you are?”

“What?”

“You are a man who has yet to ask me over for spaghetti night.”


	3. Chapter 3

"What do you think you're doing?"

Angela saw Eric's accusatory finger aimed at her shopping basket. She examined the contents, but saw nothing that should cause offense. "I'm buying food."

He plucked a bag of peaches and a banana bunch out of the basket and held them up. "This is fruit."

"I know."

"Why are you buying fruit?"

"It's food for the road."

"I think you missed the part where I said junk food for the road. You know: chips, cookies, candy, donuts- the good stuff. Fruit isn't what...please tell me those aren't vegetables under the tortilla chips." He covered his eyes.

She pulled out the package of assorted, pre-cut veggies. "What's wrong with these?"

"They're worse than the fruit! Honestly, have you never been on a road trip before?"

"Not really. I've moved a lot, but there wasn't much time for fun, games, and "proper" road trip food. Military moves were the epitome of efficient. My dad would have it no other way." She looked back at the vegetables he was protesting. "They come with ranch dressing for dipping. Does that help?"

"Barely."

"I can't just eat crap. You eat nothing but crap, you feel like crap."

"Says who?"

"Fruits and vegetables are healthy, filling snacks that won't leave you constantly hungry and feeling like you need a nap. I'm not some sort of health food nut, but you need balance: everything in moderation."

Eric stared at her for a minute. "You were the kid who wasn't allowed to leave the dinner table until you ate all your vegetables, weren't you?"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"I knew it," he said with a chuckle. "How about this: you pick out a couple delicious, junk food items and I'll get one or two things that show up on the good part of food pyramid."

"That sounds like a fair compromise. Just don't try to pass off Raisinettes as fruit with the rationale they used to be grapes."

"What makes you think I would ever do that?" It was his turn to be on the receiving end of a stare. "Okay, fine. But you have to admit when push comes to shove you could totally make a case for it."

/

/

"Sno-Caps as promised," Topanga announced when she entered hers' and Angela's room. "You said no to the movie, but at least come get dinner with Cory and-" She realized that she was talking to herself. Her friend was gone. There was, however a notecard on her pillow.

"Come on, ladies." Cory appeared in the doorway. "I'm starving. I can't decide if I want tacos or pizza, so I'm thinking taco pizza. Some guy in my calculus class said the pizza place will make them if you ask. They put salsa in the place of marinara sauce. That's like a dream come true, right?" He looked around and saw that his fiancée was alone. "Did Angela not want to get dinner with us either? She's been really antisocial lately, constantly turning down our invites."

"Cory, shush." She read the note over again. It was very short. "Angela's gone."

"Where did she go?"

"I have no idea. She left this note, but that's it."

He took the piece of card stock and read it aloud. "'I'll see you when I get back. Angela.' What the heck does that mean?"

"I suppose it means she'll see us when she gets back."

"Well, duh, Topanga. She says that right here. But where is she? How was she acting when you saw her earlier?"

"She seemed fine. Obviously she's disappointed about not being able to see her dad, but she was okay. I think. You know Angela, even when she's upset and miserable she forces herself to power through like nothing's wrong. It's a distraction."

"Maybe she was able to get a flight out? Or a train?"

"I think she'd have mentioned that."

"What if something happened?" His eyes bugged out. "What if she was kidnapped?"

"Wha-are you crazy?"

"No, no, what if a group came and strong-armed her out of the room and this pathetic little note is the only clue she had time to leave?"

"That's the last time I let you pick a movie that involves hostage negotiations."

"Seriously, writing is Angela's thing. She loves it. Why else would she leave a one-sentence note? Try calling that cellular phone her dad got her."

"I'll try later." It wasn't that she wasn't curious, but as usual Cory was leaping to the worst possible- not even remotely plausible- conclusions. "You know what, I bet you're right. She was kidnapped. We should go round up ransom money." She linked her arm through his. "But first: dinner."

"Hey, guys." Shawn strolled into the room. "Are we getting taco pizza or what?"

"You invited Shawn along when you knew I was going to ask Angela to come?"

"Of course! How else will she see that they are-"

"Where is Angela?"

"She's gone, Shawnie."

"What are you talking about?"

"She's not here. The coup has been flown. Goodnight, Philadelphia, you've been a beautiful audience. Elvis has left the building."

Topanga rolled her eyes at her fiancé's endless euphemisms. "Look, she probably-"

"Oh, gone gone. But I thought she couldn't get a flight out to see her dad? Where did she go?"

Cory handed the note over to his best friend. "Topanga thinks she may have been kidnapped, but I'm trying my best to keep her calm. You know all the hysterical theories she can come up with."

She yanked Angela's note back from the guys. "Let's go get dinner."

"But-"

"I will call Angela later and find out what's going on. Do you hear me? I will do it. I'm sure part of the reason she left was to get away from you two anyway."

"What the hell do you mean by that?"

"Nothing-just…taco pizza, right? Let's go. I'm excited. Olé!" She stood in the doorway, waiting for them to follow. "Now!"

/

/

"Do you think anyone knows we're gone yet," Angela pondered. They'd been on the road for a couple hours now. That was more than enough time for Topanga to come back after going to the movies with Cory. "And that we left together?" She'd taken just enough time to scribble a note for her roommate. It was brief and vague, just enough to let her know that she was okay.

"I have no idea. If they talk to Feeny or the Dean- yes. All my parents and Morgan know is that I was helping out a friend."

"What about Rachel and Jack? Didn't they see you leave?"

"Jack was out with Shawn and Rachel had one last test this afternoon. I don't know if they'll even notice I'm gone, to be honest. They barely make time to come up for air. They're not going to miss me."

"I sincerely doubt that. You make an impression when you enter a room…or trip into a room. People notice you. Your absence will definitely be felt. Now, me on the other hand, I'm only going to be missed if Topanga needs an opinion on a wedding thing or help with her philosophy paper. Cory and Shawn will notice if they come up with a new matchmaking scheme. Otherwise...I doubt they'll give a damn."

"Of course they'll miss you. They're your friends."

Truth be told, the more time that passed since Christmas the less Angela felt like she belonged in her little group. Her so-called best friends didn't seem to understand her and kept trying to force her into a situation and romantic relationship she no longer desired. Topanga was better than the guys, but she was Cory's fiancée and often got roped in with him. It was exhausting to constantly be on guard. They now acted as though she was the one who ended her relationship with Shawn, like she was the one who broke his heart. Facts had become twisted over time and Shawn was now made out to be the poor victim because she stood up for herself and refused to be jerked around by his ever changing emotions any longer. She would love to be able to hang out with Topanga, Cory, and even Shawn again and have fun like they used to. She missed them. "We'll see."

"So what did you notice about me first, huh," he teased in a joking manner, wanting to get her out of her funk. He nudged her arm with his elbow. "Start with my eyes."

She laughed- Eric always seemed to give her a reason to laugh with him instead of at him like others did- and lightly hit his shoulder. "Shut up."

/

/

"I don't even know what to make of this, do you?"

Rachel sat beside Jack on the couch in the Student Union and scanned Eric's letter again. "I'm stumped."

"I mean, Eric's been weird before, but this?" He read aloud. "Don't worry about me. I decided to join the space program and will send you a postcard from Neptune. P.S. I hear it rains diamonds there. I'll try to smuggle some back for you." He shook his head. "This is out there, even for him. And I'm not even talking about the outer space part."

"He probably just went on a drive. He said he wanted to check out some amusement parks during break. I know that's what he had planned for Tommy before his adoption happened. He probably decided to keep his plans to stay distracted."

"It's Eric. He probably went to Disney World. Barring the Mother Ship ever coming for him Space Mountain is the closest he'll ever get to the final frontier."

"Knock it off. Things have been weird lately at home. Maybe he needed to get away. We still haven't talked with him about us being together and how it shouldn't affect the roommate dynamic. It's been a while and you said you'd handle it."

"I try, but he's hardly ever home. I've tried to talk to him, but he bolts. He says he's working here or at the wilderness store or studying with a friend, but that one is a tough excuse to swallow."

"Actually, it may not be an excuse. I saw his last English paper before I left for my class. He got a B+."

"Really? Wow, okay, maybe he is studying."

"That still doesn't help us find him."

"Didn't you see him when you saw the paper? Any hints?"

"I didn't see him. His stuff was there but I think he was in his room. I figured he was taking a nap to recover from midterms. There was no hint that he was taking off."

"Who took off?"

Rachel and Jack turned around and saw Cory, Topanga, and Shawn entering the Student Union. Jack held up the note. "Your brother's gone."

"Huh?" He read over the piece of paper. "Well, this evening just took a turn for the weird."

"Let me see." Topanga read over his shoulder. "Ooh, there's a planet where it rains diamonds? Why can't it do that on earth?"

"Topanga, focus!"

"You guys haven't seen him, have you," Rachel asked.

"Nope."

"No."

"I saw him yesterday, but nothing since then."

"Have you seen Angela," Shawn questioned the pair on the couch.

"She's gone, too?"

"I did see her this morning when we were both grabbing coffee before class," the redhead answered. "We only had time for a quick hi."

"Wasn't she supposed to go see her dad anyway?" Just earlier today Jack had to listen to his brother vent about how he wouldn't be able to try to win Angela back when she was away with her dad. He called it a wasted vacation. "Give her a break, man. Clearly bombarding her isn't working. All you're doing is pushing her farther away."

"How can you say that?"

He looked around the room in an exaggerated fashion. "You don't see her around anywhere, do you? How many times has she declined when we all go to the movies or get dinner?" He frowned. "Come to think of it, Eric hasn't exactly been Mr. Social either lately. Normally he races us to the car when we grab ice cream, but last week said no."

Topanga dug Angela's note out of her purse and took Eric's from Cory. "Hmm, so they've both been rather anti-social."

"Yes, honey, that's been established. Try to keep up, will ya?"

"And they are both nowhere to be found."

"Again, Topanga, duh."

Her eyes darted back and forth between the respective letters. Whenever Angela didn't want to tag along with whatever activity was planned for the night she said she was doing something with Eric; going to the museum, movies, the aquarium, helping him study- there was always something. Topanga thought it was lie. She thought her friend was going for a cheap excuse that no one would ever believe. Either that or she had a new guy she wasn't ready to introduce to the group yet. She'd never imagined Angela was actually spending time with Eric.

"Good evening, everyone," Mr. Feeny exclaimed as he entered the lounge area with Dean Bolander. "My, I would've expected everyone to have cleared out by now and commencing on Spring Break celebrations and relaxation."

"We're trying. How about you?" Cory walked over and nudged his teacher with an elbow. "Commencing on some Spring Break celebrations of your own with the Dean?"

"We've been working." And it was true. They'd been discussing how to handle a few students who were doing poorly in his class yet had scholarships that were dependent upon their grades. He wanted to give them an opportunity to do better and pass. She, on the other hand, while sympathetic to his point of view, said they'd had all year to seek help for any shortcomings. She had a school to help run and budgets to keep. There were hundreds of students on the wait list ready to learn. If you bent rules for one student you'd be expected to bend them for everyone and that wasn't a practical way to run things. The numbers were on her side. They'd agreed to get coffee when talks started turning contentious. "What are you up to?"

"You haven't seen Eric by chance, have you?" If he told anyone what he was up to, Cory was certain that person was Mr. Feeny. "Or Angela?"

"Yes, we actually saw them a few hours ago as they were leaving," the dean answered.

"Oh, okay, you saw them when they…what do you mean as they were leaving? They as in they just happened to leave at the same time for different locations?"

"No, they as in they got into the same car and left. Together."

"They were together," Shawn parroted.

"Eric was driving your father's car, Cory," Mr. Feeny added.

"Wow," Topanga said, speaking mainly to herself, "Angela wasn't lying."

"Lying about what?"

She gave a brief rundown about everything that's been going on and the weird things she's noticed. "I don't know. I guess I assumed she had a new boyfriend she wasn't ready to introduce us to."

"What new boyfriend? Who's she dating?"

She glared at her friend. "You're actually going to try and get jealous now, Shawn? Really? You lost that right the day you told Angela you wanted to see other people and not miss out on anything."

"I don't think she and Eric are dating," George continued.

"But that hug we interrupted did seem cozy."

"They were hugging?!" Cory rushed the dean and grabbed her arm. "And you didn't think to mention that earlier?"

"Cory, do I need to remind you that you are still on probation for physical violence against a teacher and subject to expulsion at the next probable cause?"

He loosened his hold and took a step back. "This blouse is really nice. What is it, silk?"

"Polyester blend."

"Well, it's just lovely. And the color…wow. Who knew Pepto-Bismol pink could work for a person?"

"Stop now before we're all standing in the hole you're digging for yourself."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Did they say where they were going," Rachel asked, trying to get the conversation back on track.

"Eric said they were-"

"You know," Mr. Feeny interrupted, "don't you think if you were supposed to know- you'd have been informed?"

"But, Mr. Feeny-"

"When you need to know- if you need to know- I'm sure Angela and Eric will be quite happy to fill you in." He wasn't big on keeping secrets, but there must've been a reason the two snuck off without telling any of their friends. Plus the nosiness was becoming bothersome.

"But-"

"Now go on your way. Commence your Spring Break celebrations." He clapped his hands together when no one made a move. "Go! I can always find more homework for you if you'd prefer that." They nearly tripped over themselves to evacuate the area. "I figured that would do it," he said to Lila.

"George, why didn't you just tell them?"

"Because apparently one lesson they still need to learn is respecting the privacy of others'. I seem to have failed them at that." He shrugged and shoved his hands into his pockets. "And they were getting on my nerves."

/

"Now what," Shawn asked. He simply couldn't imagine Angela going along with Eric. "Should we quiz your parents?"

Cory checked the time. "I think this is when Josh's bedtime routine starts and I don't think mom and dad would be happy with interruptions right now. She was just saying the other night that he still isn't sleeping much and how tired they all are."

"They have to know what's going on if Eric has your dad's car."

"Let's get dinner," Topanga suggested. "That was the original plan after all."

"But-"

"Shawn, Mr. Feeny's right. If Eric and Angela wanted us to know they'd tell us."

"But what if they're like…" He scrunched up his face, not wanting to picture it. "I mean, he's insane and she-"

"We're getting dinner," Rachel spoke up, standing beside Topanga. "If there's something to know, we'll know eventually."

"I just-"

Cory's gaze went from Topanga to his best friend and it was very clear to him whose side he should take if he wanted to avoid an argument. "Shawnie, let's just go. We're not finding anything out tonight."

"Fine," he mumbled. "This taco pizza had better be worth it."

/

/

"Orange car," Eric exclaimed. "I get one of your points."

"Man, how did I miss that one? It was right next to us." She squinted and looked out the window. "Ha, pink car up ahead! I get my point back."

"I think we need to stop this game. It's getting too dark to play."

"Sure, say that when I'm finally getting my points back."

"Do you want to license plate poker again or- hey, what are you doing? It's not time to switch to your music yet."

Angela held up her wrist, showcasing her watch. "Um, yes, it is. The clock in here is three minutes slow."

"Maybe your watch is three minutes fast."

"I was raised by the most punctual man ever born. My watch is not fast."

"How about we rebel and go by this clock?"

"But-"

"It's one more song. What's the big deal?"

She realized she was being silly trying to stick to such specific time constraints. "Sorry. You're right. I am acting a little ridiculous."

"That's okay. It's your first real road trip. I'll grade you on a learning curve."

"I'm being graded?"

"Uh-huh and you should know that I'm very tough. I learned it all from Mr. Feeny."

"What's my grade right now?"

"Yeah," he scoffed, "like I'm going to tell you."

"Do you accept bribes?"

Eric glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. "What did you have in mind?"

"How about we get something to eat at the next exit? My treat."

They were almost halfway through their journey. Stopping now could slow them down. "I thought we got food so we wouldn't have to stop?"

"I know, but we've been driving for hours. I need to get out and stretch my legs. We haven't stopped since we first hit West Virginia. Plus, isn't eating at a potentially sketchy roadside diner late at night part of this whole experience?"

He patted her leg. "Now you're getting it! Someone wants that A."

/

"So, how does this compare with what you were expecting from a diner," Eric asked. The waitress had just taken their orders and disappeared into the kitchen.

"Are you kidding me? There are semis parked in the lot, desserts in the display case that look like they've been there since before disco died, and our waitress has a beehive and was smacking her gum. It's everything television promised it would be!"

"Now you're laying it on a little thick." Angela checked her phone. "Topanga calling you?"

"Twice. I'll call her after we get to my dad. My note is enough for now."

"What's your dad like?"

"I've told you about him."

"Not really. All you've said is that to you he's a teddy bear and to everyone else gets the grizzly bear. What kind of guy is he? What are his hobbies?"

She snorted. "Hobbies? My dad is an army man through and through. He talks about things he'd like to do, but he can't resist when the military calls. Guilt eats at him if he dares to take personal time. He's been promising me forever that it's just going to be another couple years, but then something comes up and he says that they need him. But I need him, too. I'm going to be done with college and out in the real world before I know it. How much time am I going to get to spend with him then? It always feels like we need to squeeze a lifetime of memories into each visit. Whenever he goes off somewhere dangerous I never know if he's going to make it and…" Angela stirred her water with the straw, the clinking of ice against the glass almost hypnotic. "His dream retirement is to buy a fishing boat and spend his days on the open water, enjoying the quiet."

"I think he'd get along really well with my dad. They sound a lot alike. My dad loves anything outdoors and he was in the navy when I was really little."

"Navy? Oh, I'm sure they'd get along, but competition would be off the charts."

"What do you mean?"

"My dad is insanely competitive, especially with other branches of the military, always has been. He wants to show who the best of the best truly is, you know?"

"Yeah, my dad gets like that with his old friends, too. It sounds like our dads could turn a relaxing day of fishing into seeing who can catch the most in ten minute."

"With no bait", she added with a smile.

"Right." Eric thought carefully about his next questions. It was something they had never really discussed before. "Do you have any other family or is it just you and your dad?"

"I have some, not many, no one I really know too well because of all the traveling. My dad has a sister who lives near Las Vegas. That's where he grew up. I have a few cousins, too. Dad's parents died when I was young. I barely remember them. My mother was an only child and her dad left the family before her first birthday. I did live with my grandmother while I was going to John Adams'."

"You lived with your mother's mom?"

"Yeah."

"Wasn't that weird after she took off?" He winced, realizing how it sounded. "Sorry."

"No, it's okay. It was awkward and we were never all that close. I know she loved me, but she didn't know how to talk to me most days. I think she felt guilty, like she was responsible for her daughter bailing on her husband and kid."

"Why would you want to live with her?"

"Honest?"

"Of course."

"Two reasons: one, my dad was being transferred somewhere he didn't feel was safe for me and gave me the choice between my grandmother and my aunt. I thought if I lived with my grandmother I'd get to see my mother again." Angela's gaze fell to the table. "It never happened. They were careful to only see each other when I was in school or visiting my dad."

"Your grandmother still saw her? That seems wrong."

"We got into this huge fight about it when I found out. I didn't get it. She said it was something I wouldn't understand until I was a mother. But still…I haven't really talked to my grandmother since I moved out after graduation." When she finally looked to Eric again she nearly cringed at the look on his face. "Please don't."

"Don't what?"

"This is why I don't tell people things," she muttered. "Please take that, 'poor, pathetic Angela,' look off of your face. I don't need or want your pity. It's life. You have to play the cards you're dealt. Unfortunately my hand happened to be a little shittier than the average person so far. I'll survive. I always do. Nothing's knocked me out for the count yet." He was still staring. "Seriously, stop it."

Eric shook his head. "I don't pity you. I admire you."

"Please."

"I mean it. You've got this inner strength that I just don't have." He caught her eye roll. "You know you're going to be okay. You just know it. No matter how many times people disappoint you and let you down you keep going. You deal with it and come out stronger. I wish I had that kind of faith in myself. I don't. It's not in me. There's not a day that goes by where I don't wonder if I'm going to blow it and ruin my life and waste all this so-called potential people claim I have. What do they see that I don't? I'd love to go one day without that voice in my head."

"I wish I could believe in other people the way you do. I envy that. You know even if you have a setback there will always be family and friends right by your side to cheer you on. You will never be alone. You have a support system that you never have to question and you're a better person for it." Angela twisted her napkin in her hands. "Do you want to know why I believe even if I end up all alone in the world I'm going to be okay? It's because I have to believe it. I learned a long time ago there is no guarantee that somebody will be there to catch me when life knocks me on my ass. If I couldn't even count on my own mother to love me, I don't have a choice but to get up and keep fighting."

"Angela…" Eric could see that she was doing her best to not break down in the middle of the diner. He got up, slid next to her in the booth, and wrapped his arm around her. It was a surprise that she didn't resist and instead leaned against him. "You're not alone."

"Don't."

"No, really. You ever need a friend, or a cheerleader, or just someone to give you a great pep talk when you're feeling down, you know where to find me."

"You don't have to do this. Sure, we've been hanging out for a while, but-"

"Hey, I believe in other people, remember? I don't give up on them. You count, too. Once you've got Eric Matthews as your friend you are in for life. The next time you feel like you're falling just give me a call and I'll run over with a giant net and your favorite ice cream. Or- you know- at least your favorite veggies and ranch dip."

She laughed quietly and squeezed his hand. "Thanks, Eric."

"Anytime."

"And you don't have to worry about ruining your life. You've let fear get the better of you and you made some mistakes, but you're trying. You're resilient. I don't think you'd still be determined to find your path if you didn't have at least a little confidence in yourself. You'd have rolled over and surrendered by now otherwise. "

"I never thought about it like that." He saw the waitress coming back towards the table carrying a couple of large plates and moved back to his side of the booth. "I might need you to make me a self-help tape so I can remember that when finals come around and I'm freaking out."

"You got it."


	4. Chapter 4

"...and then I walked in and found them making out on the couch."

"I'm sorry," Angela said, patting his leg. "That had to suck." This was her first time learning how Jack and Rachel got together, or how Eric found out anyway.

"I just couldn't believe she picked Jack over me, that I lost. I'm ten times more fun than he is, right? Can you imagine Jack on a road trip?"

"Lost? What are you-"

"But he won the bet."

"What bet?"

"We made a bet to see who could win Rachel."

"Are you serious? You guys treated her like some trophy?"

"I know, I know. We're pigs. If it's any consolation I feel really bad about it now. We were wrong. I get it."

She could continue to vent at him for treating a friend like an object, but his remorse seemed genuine. "The thing that bothered you most was "losing" to Jack?"

"I guess." He covered his mouth and tried to hold in a yawn. "Why?"

The yawn didn't go unnoticed. Eric had been yawning and rubbing his eyes a lot in the past hour or so. Still, he seemed hesitant to let her drive. "Nothing, I just think if you'd really wanted to be with Rachel the most devastating part would be watching her with someone else, not that you lost a ridiculous bet with your friend."

He was quiet for several moments. True, it had bothered him to see Rachel with Jack, but not like he thought it would. The thing that bugged him the most was "losing" so to speak. "I wasn't really in love with her, was I?"

"It doesn't sound like it."

"And to be honest, I pretty much focused on making Jack look an idiot instead of trying to make Rachel fall in love with me." He glanced at Angela. "So, what...I loved the competition? That was the fun part?"

"Maybe."

"Does that make me a terrible person?"

"No. Don't get me wrong, it's not your most shining moment, but you're not a terrible person."

"I don't know if I should be relieved I didn't love her or pissed that I wasted so many months thinking I did."

She put her hand on his arm. "Be relieved and learn from it. You can't change the past and if you spend too much time looking back and analyzing things you could miss the next opportunity that comes your way."

"Smart advice, of course you're also trusting that I'm not too stupid to see when opportunity is in front of me." He yawned again.

"Eric, you're not stupid. You're a creative thinker. You are also very tired and I insist you let me drive for a while."

"No, I'm okay. Maybe we'll stop for coffee at the next exit. That will perk me up."

"Come on. You've been doing all the driving and we still have a couple hours left to go. Take a nap."

He hesitated. "I don't know."

"What did Cory tell you about my driving? You cannot take the word of someone who would be outrun by an elderly person with a walker."

"Are you a bit of a speed demon?"

"Compared to Cory, yes, but then who isn't? Baby Josh probably cruises in his stroller at a faster speed," she quipped, making Eric smile. "Remember what I said about the elderly person and the walker? I didn't pull that example out of my ass. It actually happened."

"Oh, I believe you. I've been in the car with him."

"Then let me drive."

"Angela, it's my dad's car."

"I know."

"If anything happened to it, I'd rather he be mad at me, not you."

"Why do you think something could happen?"

"I don't, it's just on the off chance one of us were to hit a deer or skid to the side of the road or get rear ended I would want it to happen with me behind the wheel."

"That's a long, rambling way of saying you don't trust me to drive."

"Dad doesn't even like when my mom drives his car." He hated having the seat position messed up and his preferred radio stations changed. "He handed over the keys without me asking- and I wasn't going to even try. That's huge for him. He trusted me in a way he hasn't in a long time."

"I get that, but answer one thing for me."

"Shoot."

"How do you think he'll react if we get into an accident because you were falling asleep when you had a passenger with a license and was very well rested from her nap? You're a bigger hazard than I am right now."

That never occurred to him. His dad would go ballistic if he fell asleep behind the wheel. Eric sighed, watching as lightning lit up the sky in the distance. They were closing in on the storms he'd hoped to avoid. He really did need to close his eyes for a little bit. Exhaustion and bad weather were difficult enough to combat by themselves, together they were downright dangerous. "Fine, we'll switch at the next exit."

"Smart move, if something did happen you wouldn't only have your dad to worry about. Mine would want to kick your ass, too."

/

/

Shawn tossed and turned in his bed, unable to sleep. His thoughts kept drifting to Angela. Ever since he'd found out she took off with Eric of all people he was unable to focus on anything else. He glanced at the alarm clock on his nightstand: 2:48. It was much too early to go out and do anything; or too late, depending how you looked at it. "Cory," he called out in a loud whisper. "Cory?" He reached under his bed, pulled out a flashlight, and shined it on his best friend's face. "Cory, are you awake?"

Cory bolted upright in bed. "No, clowns, no!" He was blinded as soon as he opened his eyes. "Ah!"

"Relax. No clowns." He turned off the flashlight and switched on the lamp. "It's just me."

"Shawn?" He rubbed his eyes as they tried to adjust. "What are you doing? What time is it?"

"Almost three."

"Oh, okay. Nice chatting with you. Nighty-night." He fell backwards onto his pillow.

"Cory, get up!"

"This had better be good," he grumbled, sitting up again. After pulling all-nighters for the past week cramming for midterms, the exhaustion had caught up with him. "Did you have the clown dream tonight, too?"

"You know we never have the clown dream on the same night. That would just be weird."

"Any weirder than both of us have the exact same recurring nightmare?"

"Well, no, but-"

"Then what is it? Spit it out."

"Was Jack right?"

"If I say yes can I go back to sleep?"

"Damn it, Cory, I really need to talk."

"You're buying me breakfast tomorrow."

"Fine."

Cory sighed before kicking the covers off and moving to sit at the edge of his bed. "All right, what is it?"

"Do you think Jack was right about me pushing Angela away?"

"You have been hounding her these past few weeks."

"It's not like I'm alone. You told me to do it! You've been saying how meant to be we are and said I shouldn't quit."

"Then I guess I'm hounding her, too, by trying to get you guys back together."

"Where does Eric fit in?"

"I didn't know they were hanging out until you did, Shawnie."

"What do you think they're doing? What kind of relationship do they have?"

He fought to keep his eyes open. "I have no idea and frankly, I don't want to think about it too much."

"You really think they're...that they-"

"I don't know." He rested his elbow on his leg and held his head in his hand.

Shawn was frustrated with his friend's lack of answers. "Can't you give me anything else?"

"It's three in the morning. Forgive me for not prepping for this verbal pop quiz," he snapped. "Even Mr. Feeny has the decency to wait until the sun is up."

"Sorry if my life crisis is bothering you. It's not my fault bad things keep happening to me."

"Oh, cut the crap, Shawn."

His jaw dropped. "Excuse me?" Even a mild swear was rare from his friend. Cory still said fiddlesticks when he stubbed a toe.

"You did this to yourself. You're the one who broke up with Angela to see what else was out there. You wanted to meet new people. I told you to stay with the girl you loved, who loved you. I warned you that you were throwing away one of the best things in your life, but you didn't listen." Cory was fairly certain he'd regret most of this rant in the morning, but he was working on about two hours of sleep. The filter between his brain and mouth weren't awake yet, leaving him unable to phrase things in a Shawn-safe manner. "You can't have it both ways. You can't have Angela around only when you feel like it. She's not a winter coat you put in the back of the closet because it's out of season."

"You're against me now, too?"

"I'm always going to be on your side and root for you and Angela to get back together."

"I sense a "but" in there."

"But yes, maybe Jack is right. Maybe all you can do now is back off and see if she comes back to you."

"And if she doesn't?"

"I don't-I don't know." While Shawn was his best friend, he also remembered how hard Angela took the breakup, however much she tried to hide it. She'd trusted him enough to bare her true feelings and all he did was use that information to try and force a reunion. In hindsight Cory can see that he wasn't being a very good friend to her at all. It was almost laughable considering all the work he put in to convince her that they really were friends, not just people who hung out due to circumstance.

Shawn switched off the lamp and lay back down without saying a word. He heard Cory burrowing back underneath his blankets and when he said nothing else, assumed he had fallen back to sleep immediately.

"Shawn?"

He jumped. "Yeah?"

"Just give her time. She'll come around."

"You think?"

He wanted to give an emphatic positive to the question posed, but all he could muster was a lukewarm, "Maybe."

/

/

Angela spotted the sign welcoming her to Lexington in between sheets of rain. It began to pour not long after she took the wheel. She wasn't sure she had ever seen rain like this before, certainly had never driven in it. The car ahead of her only had one working brake light and while she wanted to get around it the wind seemed to be working against her. She briefly glanced to Eric in the passenger seat. If it wasn't for the occasional snore or mumbled gibberish she'd swear he was in a coma. How was it possible for a person to sleep that soundly? Between the claps of thunder, cracks of lightning, and the howling wind she thought for sure he'd be awake.

After another hour or so of tense driving, Angela realized that the driver's side of the car was drooping lower at an exceptionally quick pace. They must've hit something at some point; a bottle, a rock, a piece of glass. "Eric?"

He shifted around in his seat. "Hmm…yeah?"

"I think we have a flat tire."

"There should be Band-Aids in in the glove box to fix it," he mumbled, still half asleep.

She shook his shoulder. "Eric."

He opened his eyes. "Okay, I'm up. What is it?"

"We've got a flat."

Eric noticed the same thing she saw earlier: the driver side was definitely lower. "What did you do?"

"What do you mean, what did I do? I didn't do anything except navigate the monsoon for the last couple hours."

"Oh, wow, when did it start raining?"

"It's been a while. You were out of it. How are you such a heavy sleeper?"

He shrugged. "It's one of the few things I excel at. I did a sleep study once to analyze dreams, boy was the lady running it impressed. The poor mouse on the other hand-"

"I'm sure that's a great story, but tell me later. What are we going to do about the tire?"

"Where are we? We've got to be close to your dad's, right?"

"We passed Lexington about an hour and a half ago. But before that the highway patrol was diverting cars away from a washed out road, so we're behind sched…ooh, what does that sign say?"

He leaned forward. "Welcome to Elizabethtown. Population…"

"We don't need to know that. It's too far to drive on a flat, right?"

"I think so," he began, fiddling with the GPS device from his dad and comparing it to the old-fashioned map. "Yeah, we're still almost two hours out. It's not safe, especially in this weather. I'd say keep going until the next exit, but I don't want to risk driving on the rim when it's like this." Eric shook his head, wishing weather conditions were better, or at least that it was daylight. "Just pull to the shoulder when we get to an overpass. My dad's got an emergency kit in the trunk. There should be some flares in there."

"Okay."

/

"Angela, get back in the car," Eric said a few minutes later. "We don't both need to get soaked and be targets for lightning."

"I'm not sitting and doing nothing while you fix it. I know how to change a tire, too." They practically had to shout to hear each other over the rain.

"But- damn it!" The flashlight kept falling to the side. Perfect. They had tried to find a light to park near, but it seemed they were out due to the storm. Now they were on a deserted highway in bad weather with absolutely nothing around them for miles. Angela's phone wasn't getting a signal so they couldn't even call for a tow truck. The only thing working in their favor was being under the overpass, though with the wind they may as well be standing out in the open.

"Here." She picked up the flashlight. "I'll hold it steady."

As he got to work loosening the lug nuts, Eric found a new appreciation for his dad's insistence at teaching basic car repairs when he got his license. Dad even made him change a tire with the sprinklers going at him to simulate rain. He claimed it was a technique they used in the navy, but Eric occasionally wondered if he just enjoyed making things challenging sometimes.

Angela felt useless standing there holding the light, but she'd just be in the way if she tried to help. Eric seemed to know what he was doing. She kept looking up, both mesmerized and terrified by the lightning that crawled across the night sky.

"Almost done," he shouted, placing the wheel cap back on. Eric was gathering the tools together when he heard a loud horn. Just ahead, in the oncoming lane, was a semi struggling to keep straight. It kept drifting into their lane seemed to be headed right for them. He grabbed onto Angela's jacket with both hands and pulled her down, taking cover near the trunk. The truck whizzed by, running over a wrench, but sparing them and the car. They were drenched by the wave the truck left in its wake. "You okay," he asked a few moments later, noting her dazed expression. "Angela?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she answered slowly. "I'm fine." It had just registered with her brain to run when Eric pulled her out of the way. "Thanks."

He nodded, a little stunned by the incident himself. They sat there for a minute, trying to regain their bearings.

"We should get up. No need to be roadkill for another truck."

"Right." Eric stood and held out his hands to help Angela to her feet. "You sure you're okay?"

"Yes. Are you?"

"I'm definitely awake now," he responded in an attempt to crack a joke. It was either laugh or freak out over how close they came to serious trouble.

The remainder of the drive was nowhere near as eventful, for which they were both grateful. Daylight was breaking as Eric approached the base. It was still raining heavily, but the wind had died down. "Where do I go?"

"Just drive up to the gate. They'll ask to see our I.D.'s and your registration. Then they will probably send us to the visitor's center for a pass for you. I'm not sure if my dad alerted them to my flight cancellation, so they may no longer be expecting me, but I still have my military I.D. so I should be okay."

"You're what?"

"My military family I.D., this way I can access other parts of the base when I'm with dad." She took it out of her wallet. "See? It kills me that this picture is better than the one on my license."

"Both pictures look good to me. They need to know ahead of time who is coming?"

"It's quicker if they have a head's up. It's a military base, not a hotel. They need to know who is here."

"Right."

/

/

"I'm such a terrible person, Topanga," Cory ranted. "I yelled at Shawn. I crushed his hope of getting Angela back. I think I even swore at him."

Her eyebrows shot up. He showed up at her aunt's house just before seven a nervous wreck. "Wow. What happened?" She listened as he explained the events of the previous night. "Cory, honey, you were right. I'm so proud of you."

"Are you out of your mind?! It's Shawn! He doesn't need me to be right. He needs me to be there for him."

"And you were. I think at this point Shawn needs someone who will tell him the truth, no matter how much it hurts."

"The rest of the world does that enough. I'm the one who tries to keep him positive and looking toward the future. And right now that future is a reunion with Angela."

She put her hand on his knee. "Cory, it needs to be right for both of them, not just Shawn. If they work it out someday, great, I will be happy and support them. But he really hurt Angela and she has made it clear that a reunion isn't what she wants, at least not right now. Respect her and her decision, or else we may lose her as a friend for good."

"Don't you think you're exaggerating a little?"

"Do you see her around? She took off and only left a note. When's the last time she agreed to hang out with us?"

"I guess it's been a while. But, Shawn-"

"You said the right things last night. He needed to hear them. Maybe, coming from you, he'll actually listen."

"But I want to help him get Angela back. I want us to be two couples surviving college together. They're supposed to be like us."

"Cory, we're us and Shawn and Angela are…were Shawn and Angela. They can't be us like we can't be them."

He laid his head on her shoulder and muttered, "Everyone should be like us."

"If the whole world was like us, it would be a pretty boring world."

"But it would be a dependable world."

"As long as we can depend on each other, that's all I need." Topanga leaned forward for a kiss, but was left hanging when he got up. "Hey, what-"

"Why is Angela hanging out with Eric? Why is he hanging out with her? I've never seen them speak to each other."

"I don't know, but they seem to be spending a lot of time together."

"But they have nothing in common. Eric's an idiot and Angela-"

"She obviously sees a different side to him."

"Oh, Eric doesn't have a different side! It's nutty, nuttier, and nuttiest. Those are his modes."

"Not always."

"Fine, but the last year or two at least. I don't know what's going on with him. He acts like he's in preschool instead of college."

"College can do weird things to people. You have to stop wondering why they are spending time together and accept it. They've been hanging out for months and kept it private for a reason."

"But you said she always told you when she went out with Eric."

"Yes, but I thought the idea was just as crazy as you do and laughed in her face every time. It's only in hindsight that I realized she never once laughed with me."

He sat back down on the couch and ran his hands over his face. "What if they're dating?" He practically choked on those words. "What do I tell Shawn?"

"Advise him to be more careful in his next relationship and treat the girl better."

/

/

"Here we are," Angela stated. "Apartment 3E."

Eric smiled at the barely contained excitement in her voice. He hadn't known what to expect when going through all the checks to get to this point, but she had been fairly accurate when going over what would happen. The only surprise was when they briefly searched the car, though he supposed it made sense. They ran into a few officers who knew her and watched her grow up, and for that reason Sgt. Moore wasn't alerted to their presence so she could surprise her dad.

"I hope he's awake. He's normally up with the sun, but even he occasionally sleeps in. I didn't realize we'd be getting here this early."

"Even if he's not, I'm sure seeing you out weighs missing a few hours' sleep."

She grinned at him. "Thanks."

"It's true."

"No, I mean really. You have no idea how much this means to me." She threw her arms around his neck. "Thank you for getting me here."

Eric wrapped his arms around her waist and returned the hug with equal intensity. "You're welcome," he whispered into her hair, which was damp and cold against his cheek. "Do me a favor," he asked, speaking up.

She pulled away enough to see his face. "Yeah?"

"Let's not tell your dad about changing the tire and the semi until after we're sure he likes me. That is, if he's as scary to other people as you've made him out to be."

"Oh, he is," she teased. "But you don't have to worry."

"Really?" He was suspicious. She had, after all, built up quite the daunting image.

"You brought me here. Those are guaranteed bonus points in your favor." She spun around and rang the doorbell. "Watch."

It only took a few moments, but when the door opened and Sgt. Moore laid eyes on Angela, the look on his face was priceless. Eric took a few steps back, allowing father and daughter a bit of privacy.

"Hi, daddy."

"Angela?"

"Surprise!" She dropped her bag and welcomed the bear hug she knew was coming. The one where he lifted her off of her feet, momentarily making her feel like an eight year old again.

"What are you doing here? I thought flights were canceled."

"They were, but I had a little help from a friend."

It was then he noticed that they weren't alone in the hall. There was a boy…well, young man, standing there. He was soaked to the skin. Then again, so was Angela. "Who's the boy," he asked, placing his daughter back on her feet.

She grabbed Eric's arm and pulled him closer. "Dad, this is Eric. He drove me."

"All the way from Philadelphia," he questioned, raising an eyebrow. "In this weather?"

"Yes, sir." He held out his hand. "Eric Matthews. Nice to meet you."

Alvin's eyes narrowed as he realized where he had seen him before. "You're the one who interrupted my daughter's graduation, singing like a lunatic."

He stared up at the man. Angela failed to mention her father was a giant. "You remember me?"

"Let's just say you made an impression."

"Aw, thanks."

"I'm not sure that's a compliment."

"Dad, be nice," Angela warned.

"Sorry." He accepted the handshake. "Master Sergeant Alvin Moore. Well, both of you get in here. No need for them to charge me for water damage to the carpet out here." He closed the door behind them. "Why do you currently resemble drowned rats?"

"We had a little bit of car trouble." She briefly explained what had happened, being sure to include that Eric got her out of the way of the semi. "Between the downpours and being splashed by the truck, well…"

"You should've stopped somewhere to change. You could catch pneumonia staying like that. Angela, you know where your room is." He turned around and pointed a finger at Eric. "And you."

"Yes, sir?"

"Bathroom's right through there." He noticed that his clothes weren't just wet. They were muddy as well. "Plenty of hot water if you need a shower, too."

Eric visibly relaxed. "A hot shower sounds great, thanks."

Angela picked up his bag and gave it to him. He wasn't going to bring it in, planning on finding a hotel later, but she had insisted. "Use all the hot water and I'll kill you," she said with a smile.

He nodded. "Right."

"I'm going to head to the commissary and pick up a few things. Anything in particular your friend likes to eat?"

"No, he's not picky. And why are you saying friend like that? Eric and I are friends."

"Sweetheart, the boy volunteered to drive you 850 miles. Why would he do that if there wasn't something else on his mind?"

"He's a good person. He knew how much I needed to see you, how much I wanted to get away from things at school. He had to get away from stuff, too."

"Who's bothering you at school?"

She shook her head. "It's nothing that I can't handle. Besides, I came here to forget about annoying things, not dwell on them."

"We will talk before you go back."

"But not today."

"All right. So…I'm going to the commissary before the rain picks up again."

"Okay." She turned to go to her room, but saw her dad still lingering near the front door. "What is it?"

"Separate rooms."

"What?"

"Stay in separate rooms until I get back; unless you're in the living room or kitchen."

Angela burst out laughing. "We're friends."

"As far as I'm concerned, he's just a boy alone in my apartment with my daughter." Alvin stared at her. "Separate rooms."

"I got it. You're insane, but I got it."

/

A while later Angela came back out to the living room after her shower and discovered that Eric had fallen asleep on the couch while watching the local news. She glanced at the screen when the weatherman came on. Surely her dad would agree to let Eric stay until the storms passed. It wouldn't be right to send him back out in search of a hotel. There was no harm in letting him crash on the couch for a few days. He looked so comfortable already. She startled when he shifted in his sleep and wondered how long she'd been watching him. When he crossed his arms, Angela realized he might be cold. She took the blanket from the back of the couch and covered him. He stirred slightly and opened his eyes. "Sorry, didn't mean to wake you. I thought you might be chilly."

"Thanks," he murmured, giving her a small smile. "That was…thanks."

"Go back to sleep. I'll save some food for you."

His eyes were already closed. "Cool."


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will be addressing something with Shawn that I don't feel the writers did justice on the show. It was treated as just another one of Shawn's dramas of the week and the way it was handled always bugged me. The show neglected showing real life consequences for most of his actions that addressing it almost feels like piling even more crap onto him to where I worry I'm either victimizing or vilifying him and neither is my goal. I simply try to write realistic stories. I don't know if I always succeed, but I try.

"I'll kill him."

"Dad, no, that's not necessary," It had taken a few days, but Angela finally told her father everything that had gone on between her and Shawn. "At ease, sergeant." It was nice, though, to have him offer to kill. Sometimes she missed his over protective side. Sometimes.

"That's Master Sergeant to you, private." Alvin couldn't help but smirk at his daughter's use of military lingo. She would often use it as a small child in an attempt to get what she wanted. "And after the way he hurt you? Nope, Hunter's a dead man."

"Really, no. It's okay. I'm okay. I..." She paused and pondered her feelings. "I think I'm over it- over him."

"You're not just saying that to avoid the killing?"

"I mean it. We've been over for nearly eight months. If anything I'm mad at myself for not taking control of the situation sooner. Shawn's always going to be special because he was my first real boyfriend and for a little while he was able to love me, but he changed. He decided he needed something different and doubted what we had. I never did."

"And now?"

"It was nice while it lasted and I learned a lot." She shrugged, not entirely used to this feeling of peace when talking about the end of her relationship. It was a relief to no longer be pained by it. "I just hope Shawn gets his head together for his sake. He needs to do that before he's ready to be anyone's boyfriend again. If he wants me around as a friend, great, it's how we started, but I refuse to be jerked around emotionally by his ever-changing moods any longer."

He reached across the table and patted her hand. "I'm proud of you for being able to stand up for yourself. Those are lessons that can be difficult to learn at any age. A lot of people are so afraid to cut ties even if ending is the best for everyone involved. They hold out hope for something they can never get back."

Angela rested her free hand on top of his. "You and mom?"

His eyes widened in surprise. She never mentioned her mother. Ever. Perhaps she got that from him. If he couldn't fix something he didn't want to deal with it and shoved it to the back recesses of his mind. Of course then he ran the risk of letting it fester too long and have it blow up in his face sooner or later. "Our marriage was in trouble long before she left but I refused to see it. I didn't want to think of myself as a failure at marriage so I buried my head in the sand like a fool. I don't know, sometimes I wonder if I hadn't of been so blind and stubborn if things would've turned out differently- as far as your relationship with her is concerned."

"You mean we'd have a relationship," she quipped in a failed attempt at a joke. "What does it say when I can't remember the sound of her voice anymore?" Even after a decade the wound still wasn't healed. She suspected a family never fully got over their wife and mother walking out and never looking back.

"I still have the old home movies if you wanted to-"

"No."

"I'm sorry, baby."

"It's not your fault. She made her choice. I will never understand her reasons, but whatever those reasons are it's not your fault. She didn't need to have a relationship with you to continue being my mother."

"You know it's not your fault either, don't you? Your mother...she wasn't a happy woman. She didn't love me anymore. I don't know why she chose to surrender her life completely, but what you said is true. They were her reasons, her choices, and no excuse will ever be good enough to justify it."

Angela clenched her father's hand a little tighter, clinging to his words- though she still struggled with it sometimes. "Shawn's mother left him, too."

"Oh?"

"She was more in and out of his life, like a revolving door mom. Then his dad died recently, right after Christmas. And his dad, well, wasn't that great either, also a revolving door."

"Well, I'm sorry he's had a rough go of it, but that doesn't excuse how he treated you. Is that what drew you together initially, your lack of…maternal influence?"

"No, I've never even told him about mom. He knows you guys are divorced and I lived with grandma in high school, but…I don't know, I couldn't bring myself to tell him."

"Why not? Don't you think it would've brought you closer together? Maybe you would've been spared the pain of the breakup."

"I didn't want to be closer to him because of a lack of a mother. That's not a reason to be together- because someone else left."

"Or maybe you were afraid to get closer for fear one of you would turn around and leave like your mothers."

"He ended up leaving me anyway, so…."

"And now he's trying to come back?"

"Yeah, but I'm done playing his game."

"And how does Eric factor in?"

"I told you already, he's a friend…a really good friend." She was no longer focused on her father. Instead she was looking past him to the fridge. He still had a picture she drew when she was nine or ten. It was just the two of them- along with the dog she'd been begging for. She never did get that dog. "I can't believe you still have that picture. No, wait, I can believe you have it, but laminated and on your fridge? Why? It's barely passable stick people surrounded by colorful scribbles, practically crayon vomit."

"They're your colorful scribbles and crayon vomit. I love that picture. It's always the first thing that is put up any place I live, well, first following your actual picture."

"Good to know you have your priorities straight…sometimes."

That last part was mumbled, so Alvin didn't quite catch it. "What was that?"

Angela shook her head. "Nothing. Forget about it."

Alvin didn't want to forget about it, but the ring of the doorbell followed by swift knocks put an end to the conversation for the moment. When he opened his door he found Eric on the other side, looking sheepish and accompanied by a private.

"I didn't mean it," Eric exclaimed, wanting to beat the other guy to the punch. "It was an accident!"

"Matthews, what did you do?"

"I-"

"He wandered into a restricted area, sir," the private answered.

"I was given bad directions," he offered in an attempt to defend himself.

"I gave you the directions and there was nothing wrong with them. They should've taken you directly to the visitor's area. Where did he end up, private?"

"We found him in the yard where the tanks are kept, sir."

"That's on the complete opposite side of the base! How the hell did you get there?"

Angela came up behind her father. "Staging a coup," she questioned Eric with a grin. "Was that your real reason for bringing me here?"

"Please don't try to help me." He had been attempting to give Angela and her father some time alone. He felt bad for being the third wheel, though they didn't treat him like one. Still, until weather conditions were cleared up he was stuck.

"Any damage," Alvin asked.

"The civilian did stand on one of the tanks," the private began, glaring at the unintentional intruder, "but no, no damage."

He nodded. "I'll handle things from here, thank you. Dismissed!"

Eric slinked into the apartment and took a seat on the couch. "So, you really say dismissed and all that? Cool."

"Dad," Angela began, watching as her father paced in front of her friend. She could tell by his expression there was about to be quite the lecture. "At least give him a chance to explain." She sat next to her confused friend. "Eric, please be as specific as possible because I am dying to hear this one."

He looked to her father and was instantly reminded of his own dad when he was about to dish out lectures and punishments. "Well, you see, it started out fine and followed your directions, but I think I took a wrong turn. Then I saw a group of your fellow army people standing in a field and asked the leader guy which way to go."

Army people? Leader guy? It was all he could do not to yell. "And then?"

"He started calling out directions at me. He told me to take three lefts, a right, and then another left. So I did."

"But that doesn't sound like the way to-" He looked to his daughter when she doubled over, laughing hysterically. "You find this funny, young lady?"

"Absolutely," she choked out. When she saw that her dad was ready to blow, she made a more serious attempt to compose herself. "Eric, did it sound like he was both singing and yelling at you?"

"Yes! You've run into that weirdo, too?"

"He wasn't giving you directions," Angela stated between intermittent chuckles. "He was leading a cadence call."

"What's a cadence call?"

Alvin stared incredulously at the young man before him. "It's used to keep soldiers dressed- and before you say anything about clothes- that means keeping them moving as a unit in formation."

"Oh, so left, left, left, right, left weren't directions to the visitor's center? I guess that makes sense. It seemed like too many lefts to me," Eric mused, confused when Angela cracked up again. "What? Anybody could've made that mistake."

"Not anyone with common sense."

"Dad, be nice."

"And when you saw that you were getting closer to the tanks you didn't think to turn around?"

"I thought they were displays like at a museum. A few weeks ago Angela and I went to the planetarium and they had replicas of different space shuttles that we could sit in. I thought it was the same kind of thing."

"Definitely not."

"Can you answer one more question for me?"

This ought to be good. "What?"

"Who's Jody? Because they were yelling about them a lot, too."

The question did make him smile just a little bit. "He keeps Susie company during deployments."

Eric furrowed his brow, more confused than before. "Who's Susie?"

"I'll fill you in later," Angela said. "It's a military thing."

"You're lucky you didn't get into more trouble for trespassing onto that part of the base. It's quite the security breach."

"I told the guys who busted me that I was with you. Apparently you scare them. That's got to be a first for a guy named after a chipmunk."

Angela hid behind Eric in an effort to hide her hysterics. "It was nice knowing you."

"What did I do?"

He narrowed his eyes. "You're calling me a chipmunk?"

"No, but you share your name with one. Or have you never seen Alvin and the Chipmunks? I mean, really, they've got songs. Good ones. You know that Christmas one where someone wants a hoola hoop? And who can forget the theme song to their cartoon?" He started to sing.

She clapped her hand over his mouth. "Seriously, shut up. Even Cory doesn't Cory things up this badly."

"I Coryed it up?"

"You big time Coryed."

"Crap, I'm sorry, sir. I guess it's a good thing I shut up before I asked if you had brothers named Simon and Theodore, huh?"

/

/

"…and I saw the most beautiful dress in the window. I wasn't going to try it on, but mom talked me into it." Topanga sighed happily into the phone. She was visiting her parents in Pittsburgh for a few days and was having a lot of fun discussing the wedding with her mother. "It was every stereotypical notion of finding the perfect dress come to life. Unfortunately I can't wear it. It has long sleeves and I don't think it will work for the summer wedding we're planning. I'd overheat and pass out long before we're pronounced husband and wife."

"Uh-huh, that's a great idea. I'll get right on that."

"What? Cory, are you even paying attention to me?"

"Of course I am," he lied with an indignant tone. "I always listen to you."

"Then what did I just say?"

"Um…uh, you wanted me to take care of the thing…the thing at that place...the thing at that place you love." He was quiet for a moment. "Am I close?"

"Not even a little bit."

"I'm sorry. It's just Shawn and-"

"Is this what your break is going to be about? Obsessing about Shawn?"

"No, I made sure to leave time to obsess over Angela and Eric, too."

"Cory," she spoke through a groan. "Go to a movie or get some lunch. Didn't you say something about wanting to go to a baseball game with your dad?"

"It's still another week or two until Opening Day."

"Oh, well then go help him at the store. Surprise him. Or go by your mom and help with Josh so she can take a nap. Think about all of the brownie points you'd earn."

"But Shawn-"

"Shawn's a big boy who has to deal with the consequences of his choices and learn to move on with his life. I know you think you were too harsh with him the other night, but you were one hundred percent correct. He made his own bed."

"Please, Shawn's never made his bed a day in his life. I make it for him."

"Maybe that's the problem."

"What do you mean? If the bed doesn't get made-"

"Cory, I didn't mean his literal bed! I'm speaking figuratively."

"Well…stop that."

"And you stop trying to make the save. Shawn's never going to learn how to be happy if you keep trying to fix things for him. He needs to learn how to fix himself. It's sink or swim time."

"Who are you and what have you done with my fiancée? My Topanga would never say to let Shawn sink or swim. She would know that he needs us."

"That was before my best friend stopped confiding in me and then took off without a word. I'm not losing Angela just because you guys can't accept that their relationship is over." She was beyond exasperated at this point and was grateful to be tucked away in Pittsburgh with mom and dad, far from the insanity. Things always made sense when she was with her parents. They centered her. "Or do my friendships not count? Is it Cory and Shawn or bust? Screw everyone else? I know we always joke about it, but is it how you really see things?"

"I'm sorry. I guess we have put you in kind of a weird position with Angela."

"Yes, you have." She checked the time. "I have to go. My dad is taking me out to lunch and then I'm meeting mom for dinner. My poor parents are working so much and almost never home at the same time. I'll call you later, okay? Do not forget to check out that reception hall in Fairmount Park. They have two holes in their calendar for June and the coordinator said they won't last long."

"Just one more thing."

"What?"

"What did Angela say when she called you? Word for word, exactly what did she say?"

They had gone over that about twelve times by now. "I'll talk to you tonight. I love you. You're tap dancing on my last nerve, but I love you. Good-bye."

/

/

"…and then she threw a fit and tossed her plate on the floor because we were out of turkey for her sandwich."

Eric nudged Angela with his elbow. They were eating lunch with her dad and he started to tell stories of what she was like as a child. "Way to go, Miss Stellar Table Manners. And to think you lectured me for having my elbows on the table at the pizza place last week."

"That's only because your sleeve kept going into the garlic butter."

"It was something for later," he joked before turning back to Sgt. Moore. "So, what happened next? Was she grounded?"

"She was four, so no. But she was insistent that she couldn't just have a cheese sandwich because something was missing."

"Oh, so what did she get: ham or chicken?"

"That would've made sense, but no, she insisted on peanut butter."

He made a face. "Seriously? I've come up with some weird food combos, but peanut butter and cheese? I bet you were throwing up the rest of the day."

"You would think, but she not only ate all of it, she demanded another sandwich. Her mother and I were horrified."

Angela ignored the Eric's disgusted face. "I was four! But it's still good."

"You still eat it?"

"Not since I moved out of grandma's house because a mini fridge can only hold so much. The best way to eat it is grilled. It's just like grilled cheese but better."

"We must have different definitions of better."

"No, you watch. When we get back to Philadelphia I'm going to your place and I'm making you dinner."

"I'll have 911 on speed dial."

"Hey, I tried your Oreos and orange juice combo. You owe me."

"Fine," he said, sighing dramatically. "But if I puke I get my choice of the next two…no, three activities."

"Deal."

Alvin closed the lid on his takeout container, the conversation having killed his appetite. Instead he focused on the rapport between his daughter and the boy who's spent the past few nights camping out on his couch. Their jokes, laughter, and smiles seemed to come easily. When telling him about things they've done they finished each other's sentences. They were very comfortable together. He was about to ask a question about an upcoming exhibit they were discussing when his phone rang. "Excuse me," he said as he got up and went to the living room. "Hello? Oh, yes, hi. Right, so tomorrow at thirteen hundred hours instead? Okay. Yes. Sure. See you then." When he went back to the kitchen Angela was burning a hole right through him. "What is it?"

"What do you have to do tomorrow?"

"They need someone to assist at a recruiting event at Fort Knox. I'll be home in time for dinner."

She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. "You made plans when you knew I would be here?"

"No, they called me right after you told me about your flight cancellation."

"And when I showed up you couldn't call back and say, 'Sorry, my daughter's here. I can't?' It's so typical."

"Sgt. Meyer was supposed to take care of it, but he's sick and under strict orders to take it easy. Angela, it's an afternoon. What is the big deal?"

"You always do this to me. You promise that we're going to spend all this time together but then the army calls and our plans go out the window."

"I don't always-"

"We haven't seen each other in nearly a year, dad. How many visits between the summer and now have you had to cancel?"

"One or two."

"Five."

He hadn't realized it had been that many. All he knew was that he dreaded the phone call he'd have to make to her every time. "Things come up that I have to take care of. There is a lot of responsibility that comes with my position."

"There's a lot of responsibility that comes with being my father, too, but apparently that doesn't mean as much to you." Angela stood up and stared her father in the eye. "I always knew the army outranked me in your life, but I never thought you'd flaunt it in my face and expect me to be okay with it."

"Angela-"

"No. Go to Fort Knox, don't go, freaking move there for all I care. Don't expect me to be here when you get back. Eric, I'm going to pack. We're leaving."

"But the roads are still a mess. They were saying on the news there's risks of mudslides and-"

"Fine, then I'll fly and you can stay."

She rushed out of the room and Eric winced seconds later when her door slammed shut. When he finally looked at her father he didn't see the tough, intimidating military sergeant always described to him. The man standing before him was neither tough nor intimidating. He was completely lost.

/

/

"This is just too weird," Rachel said, pushing Jack away and scooting to the other end of the couch.

"What's weird?"

"I keep expecting Eric to come barging in and catch us."

"But that's not going to happen. He's hundreds of miles away."

"I know you're right, but it's still weird and we need to talk about it."

He sighed and rested his head on the back cushions to stare at the ceiling. With Eric gone Jack had hoped to take advantage of the time alone with Rachel and focus on being a regular couple. They weren't supposed to be watching their backs for Eric right now. "Talk about what?"

"What are we going to tell Eric when he comes back? He's been avoiding us lately to the point where we didn't even know what was going on with him. We didn't know he was hanging out with Angela or doing better in school and getting B's on papers."

"Why are you complaining? It's been peaceful around here lately. And better grades? Hey, if Angela can translate information into Eric-ese and get it through his kooky brain in a way that makes sense to him, more power to her."

"You don't miss him? I kinda have."

"I guess it has been a little boring around here."

"Nice thing to say to your girlfriend and roommate. How long have I been boring you?"

"Oh, no, you don't. You started this whole Eric conversation. You don't get to turn it into a knock against you when I agree and say things have been different."

She scooted back over to Jack's side of the couch and wrapped her arms around him. "I'm sorry."

"That's okay. If anything I'm dreading when they come back home."

"Why?"

"I'm going to be in the middle. Eric's…let's face it, he's my best friend."

"But?"

"Shawn's my brother. If there is something more serious going on between Eric and Angela I'm going to have to pick a side. Hell, even if there's not and they're just friends he's still probably going to see it as some form of betrayal. Shawn loved…loves Angela, I know that, but he wasn't always good to her."

"He's been through a lot. It's only natural that it took him a while to decide what he wants. Not that it's fair to put Angela through the roller coaster, but it's sort of understandable."

"It's not just that." He ran his hand through his hair. "Forget it. It was a long time ago. I don't know why it still bothers me."

"What is it?"

"Promise it won't change the way you see Shawn?"

"Jack, you're scaring me."

"You remember how I told you that Shawn experimented with alcohol a bit in his senior year?"

"Yeah?"

"This one day Angela was here and we were trying to talk some sense into him. He ended up pushing her against the door. It wasn't a gentle thing either. He shoved her hard."

"Oh."

"I know it was the alcohol and he would never soberly act like that, but…" He shook his head. "I guess what gets to me the most is how I handled it. I just stood there. We all stood there as though we couldn't believe what happened. The look on Angela's face was just…hurt, fear, betrayal- you name it and it was there. I didn't even check to see how she was. Neither did Cory. Topanga did, but she came back after a few minutes. Even then I didn't ask her how Angela was. Honestly, it was like we were all in shock."

"Jack, you can't blame yourself for-"

"No. I could've done something, helped her in some way…given her a ride home. I don't know." He shook his head. "It woke Shawn up and convinced him to get help, but I still can't get Angela's face out of my mind. The only other time I've seen someone look like that was my mother with Chet."

"I thought she left him when you were really young."

"She did. It was when he came over for a visitation. He showed up drunk and got in her face. He grabbed her arm and she looked terrified. Seeing my mom scared like that scared me and I started to cry. After that day I didn't see Chet again for a very long time. Would you believe that's one of my earliest memories," he asked with a humorless laugh. "Nice, huh? What a lasting impression to have of your dad."

"I'm so sorry you had to go through that." He shrugged her off. "What does this have to do with Shawn and Angela?"

"Yesterday he asked me if I would talk to her when she gets back and tell her that he means it when he says he loves her. All I can do is wonder why I would ever tell Angela to be with someone who put that look on her face even once. I know he got help, did what he was supposed to, and as far as I know hasn't touched alcohol since. I feel like a bad brother for thinking like this. Shawn's not some monster. He got drunk and made a mistake."

"You're not a bad brother. I think it's honorable to consider things beyond familial harmony and be willing to see beyond what he wants."

"Shawn's not going to think so when I refuse to pick a side."

/

/

"Angela loves you sir. I'm sure she didn't mean it when she said she didn't care where you are. She just misses you."

Alvin stared at the chipped woodgrain of his kitchen table and wondered how he got into the position where he was being reassured that his daughter loved him. "I miss her, too. These separations aren't easy for me either."

"You're the one who's always cancelling on her so can't you see why she might think they are?"

He was going to express his outrage, but realized he didn't have a proper counter. "You've known Angela for a long time, correct?"

"I wouldn't say that. Sure, we met a couple years ago, but I don't feel like I really got to know her until a few months ago. It's almost like that's when we really met. A random meeting kind of changed everything."

"What do you mean?" He listened as Eric told him about the night at the museum and the following dinner and ice cream. And how after that they started hanging out and spending more and more time together.

"I know this is going to sound crazy, but I feel like because we didn't know each other very well that I was able to be myself around her because she wasn't expecting me to act a certain way like everyone else. And I like to think she's let her guard down and been herself, too."

"How does everyone else in your life expect you to behave?"

"Like a crazy idiot."

"Why would they expect that and does it have anything to do with you singing to the principal like a madman at her graduation?"

"Some might call that crazy, but Feeny ended up coming back to town so it was totally worth it."

"What about your little stunt with the tanks today? More idiocy?"

"That was an accident! Though maybe I was an idiot for not catching on sooner."

"At least you didn't inadvertently start any wars."

"That we know of," Eric added.

Alvin sighed. "Tell me, in all of the time you've spent together, what has Angela told you about me?"

"Mainly that she loves you and misses you a lot. She's always saying how she'd give anything to have more time to spend with you. To her it feels like whenever you have the chance to choose between her and the army you pick the army."

He closed his eyes, pained by the young man's words. How had he allowed things to reach such a low in his relationship with his daughter? "I enlisted when I was eighteen. I was smart, but was never one for the classroom and couldn't imagine spending four more years voluntarily stuck behind a desk in college. The army provided the order, structure, and discipline I was searching for. I was no longer the kid who wouldn't apply himself. I had a purpose."

"Yeah, that's kind of what my dad said about joining the Navy."

"Your father is a Navy man?"

"He was. He gave it up when I was really little. He came in second place in his weight class for boxing once," Eric bragged, "got silver gloves and everything."

"That's quite impressive. Why did he give it up?"

"He missed Cory's first steps. After that he realized he'd rather be home."

Alvin was fortunate to be there for Angela's first words and first steps. It wasn't until later that he began missing things. "I don't know what Angela has told you about our family, but-"

"I know about her mom."

"She told you?"

"Yeah."

That was not information she easily shared. "Maybe I didn't know how to adapt to being a single parent, but I love Angela. I've always tried to do what I thought was best for her."

"I'm not the one you need to convince."

/

"Angela, can I come in," Alvin question softly, sticking his head inside her room. She hadn't responded to his knocks. When he entered he found that she wasn't packing as she had threatened. Though, he'd almost rather have walked in on her packing than the sight before him. She was curled up on her bed with a stuffed animal clutched to her chest. "You still have your sloth?"

"You won him for me. Of course I kept him."

He smiled at the memory of a carnival many years ago. She'd wanted a stuffed animal so badly and proclaimed him the strongest, best daddy in the world who would win one for her. He wound up spending nearly forty dollars on that rigged game in order to make his little girl happy. "I still can't believe out of all the animals on that wall you chose the sloth." He expected her to pick a teddy bear, maybe a stuffed dog or a duck. But no, not his daughter- his daughter wanted the sloth.

"Sebastian spoke me."

"That's a name from The Little Mermaid, right?"

"Right."

"Sweetheart, can we talk?"

Angela rolled over and stared at the wall. "You can talk, doesn't mean I have to listen."

"I deserve that." He decided to be bold and sat at the edge of her bed. "I'm not a perfect man or a perfect father. I suppose it's easier to be a man…a soldier than a father. As I solider I know what to do, how to act, what to say- it's not a mystery. I almost never screw it up and the rare times I do the worst that happens is a superior yells at me. But being a father, it harder. I don't always know what to do or the right things to say. Everything is a mystery and when I screw up my relationship with you suffers. I already failed at the family thing once with your mother and the thought of fracturing our relationship is terrifying."

She sat up and faced her father. "That's the smartest thing you've said all day."

"I'm sorry if I've ever made you feel like you were anything but the most important person in my life."

"I just need you to be there. I'm getting older but I still need my dad. Call more. Visit when you can. Stop cancelling on me unless it is completely out of your control. Be transferred closer to Philadelphia," she added in a quiet voice. It was either that or ask him to retire.

"I promise I will do everything I can to make that happen."

"Good."

"Are we okay?"

"If you keep your promises we will be."

Alvin nodded. "That's fair. I love you, Angela. I'm sorry I haven't done a very good job of showing it lately."

"I love you, too. And I'll try to be understanding when you have to work. You're right, you'll only be gone for the afternoon tomorrow."

"Actually, I won't. I called and told them to get someone else."

"Really?"

It almost hurt how much her face lit up at the news. "They gave me hell, but you're worth it."

Angela threw her arms around him. "Thank you, daddy."

"How about we spend the whole day together tomorrow, just the two of us? I was just reading about a carnival not too far from here. Maybe I can win you another stuffed animal."

"Sounds great, but what about Eric?"

"I'll send him on another tour of the base…this time with a chaperone."


	6. Chapter 6

The crick in his neck was the first thing Eric was conscious of upon waking up. More than a week of sleeping on Sgt. Moore's couch had taken its toll. The roads were deemed passable- flooding receded and there was no longer a risk of mud slides- days ago yet he stayed. He was going to leave, wanting to give Angela and her father some privacy, but Sgt. Moore practically insisted Eric stay, pointing out that by the time he got to where he was going he'd have to turn back to pick up Angela and head home. The older man had a valid point. Still, he made sure to find something to do most days. Eric knew how important this time with her dad was to Angela and didn't want to intrude.

Even with all of the time spent with her father, she still made time to hang out with him and didn't make him feel like a third wheel. They usually ate dinner together and watched a movie or some television before going to bed. Heck, even Sgt. Moore took him out to lunch a couple times, being sure to mention he was the one who stumbled upon the field of tanks. Eric got even by repeating his Alvin and the Chipmunks joke. It was a big hit among the officers. He had to admit it was going to be strange to go back home and back to reality.

He shifted around with the vague hope of getting comfortable enough to fall back to sleep, but was unsuccessful. It was a little after nine and the only other indication of life was faint music coming from somewhere else in the apartment. That was unusual. Typically Sgt. Moore was milling around the kitchen and onto his second cup of coffee by now. Maybe he and Angela went out for breakfast? But then where was the music coming from? Eric gave up on sleep and went to investigate, choosing to ignore the noises he made while getting up. Twenty-one years old and already starting to sound like his father. It had to be the couch.

It didn't take long for the music to lead him to Angela's room. There he found her on her bed surrounded by notebooks and papers. She was so completely engrossed and had no idea he was there. He decided to take advantage of her obliviousness and watch her. He was struck by how pretty she looked in her pajamas and her hair tossed up in a bun. He didn't typically allow his mind to go there. Angela was his friend and you're not supposed to see your friends and think, 'ooh, pretty,' but that was all that came to mind. She was so relaxed. That was what stood out- she was comfortable. She wasn't on guard or looking over her shoulder for Cory and Shawn to appear. She looked content. Happy. It pleased him to no end that he played a small part in her current merriment. He wished he could guarantee that she'd be this happy when they returned home and momentarily wondered when her happiness began to matter so much to him.

"It's not a museum exhibit, even if dad tries to keep it looking like one," Angela commented, amused. "I won't charge you admission."

"Sorry, I was just following the music. It kind of looked like you didn't want to be bothered."

She smiled at him, catching sight of his sleepy expression and major case of bedhead. Considering how much he cared about his appearance, it was quite adorable. "You're not a bother." It was impossible not to laugh when Eric mimed unhooking a velvet rope as he entered. "I know. It's practically a shrine."

"I like to think my parents would've kept my room like this if they didn't have to give it to Morgan when Josh was born."

"It's hard to believe this is only the third time I've ever been here. My dad is such a crazy minimalist, except when it comes to my things. Then he's a hoarder."

"Oh, so it's more like a wish you were here room?" Eric scanned the wall, mesmerized by all of the medals and certificates. "Is this all of your dad's stuff?"

"Yeah, he won't display them in the living room because he doesn't like showing off. He's very humble. I've always had his stuff up in my room. I'm proud of him and want to brag. I have a few of his things in Philadelphia, but I'm paranoid that someone could take them, so they're kept hidden. But at least I can take them out and look whenever I want."

He whistled. "This is impressive. And now that I see the awards for shooting and marksmanship I'm glad he likes me."

"Who said he likes you," she teased.

"Hello, who did he take to the transportation museum? Not you. Besides, who wouldn't like me?" He moved on to the next wall. "Wow, someone's a bit of a Brainiac."

"Oh, yeah, dad said if I put his awards up, he was putting mine, too."

"Seriously, this has to rival Topanga's collection."

"Well, I did come in third for valedictorian right behind Topanga and…and…I don't remember his name."

Eric closed his eyes and visualized her graduation. He was onstage singing to Mr. Feeny, he looked to the side and, watching him in amazement…or horror, it was hard to tell, were Shawn, Angela, Topanga, Cory, and…"Oh, Minkus!"

"That's it."

"Third, really?" He removed a frame from the wall. It held a Principal's Award with Mr. Feeny's signature on it.

"Yeah, bouncing around to different schools screwed me over a little with credits and learning different teaching styles, though I always did my best to keep up."

"Why hide this? Let people know you're as smart as Topanga."

"I don't know if I would go that far. Besides, Topanga needs to be the smartest person in the room. It's important to her." Angela thought it had something to do with giving up Yale and needing to remind herself how smart she was as some form of self-validation. Not that she's ever broached the topic with her friend. It wouldn't end well. "Me, I don't care. If you act like the smartest person in the room then people expect that to always be true. There's no room for error. Who wants that pressure?"

"That's always been my philosophy. Be dumb and no one expects nothin' from you."

"Eric, you're not-"

"What are all these papers," he interrupted. "More awards?"

She wanted to press the issue and remind him of how smart he was, but it was obvious he wasn't in the mood. "No, just writing I did when I was a kid. There's creative writing assignments, short stories, parts of what I'd hoped would turn into songs, my attempt at nine to write a musical, and a bunch of little plays. Most of them are various one woman shows I would write out and make my parents and stuffed animals watch me perform."

"No way!" He was about to take a seat on the bed when he remembered all of those marksmanship awards on the wall. The floor was safer. "You wrote a one woman show? So did I! Well…it was a one man show."

"Obviously." She choked back giggles when he sat on the floor instead of next to her, knowing exactly why he did it. "You really wrote a show?"

"You mean you never heard of, Eric Matthews: Look at Me, Look at Me: A One Man Show?"

"I can't say I have."

"I sold tickets and rented that little theatre space above the bowling alley on Beck St. and everything."

"Big box office success?"

"I thought it had potential, but the critics were rude meanies who either left or fell asleep- even my parents. If they weren't sleeping they looked embarrassed."

"That doesn't sound supportive."

"Eh, it sucked. Maybe I should've left out kindergarten cubby troubles and pooping my pants on a bus when I was six." He caught her look. "It was a field trip and it was a long ride back to the school. No bathrooms on school busses. No one would sit next to me for weeks. Even the teacher looked at me weird."

She rubbed his shoulder. "Aw, I'm sorry."

"That's okay. At least I tried to do something, right?"

"Definitely."

"And when I get some more life experience I'm going to write a hit!"

"I look forward to that. Do you still have it?"

"The sucky play?" She nodded. "Yeah, it's propping up a wobbly table leg at home. Why?"

"I'd like to read it sometime. Maybe you can even act it out for me."

"Even though it sucks?"

"Yes."

"Will you let me read yours'?"

"Sure."

"Will you act one out?"

"We'll see."

/

/

Shawn closed the door to his dorm and stepped out into the hall, careful not to jostle the bags in his hand. He'd been a little lazy in getting the garbage out over break, but now that Cory was due to come back to the dorms after having spent a few days at home to hang out with his family, he was hauling ass to get the room clean so as to avoid a lecture. A loud thud from Angela and Topanga's room across the hall caught his attention. Weird. As far as he knew Topanga was still in Pittsburgh and Angela was with her father...and Eric. He turned the knob and it was unlocked. There he found Topanga crouched on the floor with a pile of books at her feet. "Topanga?"

"I'm fine," she called out, "just knocked over some books."

He entered the room and knelt down to help her. "What did you do, take out the whole bookcase?"

"No, just one shelf. I accidentally put all my heavy books to one side and it buckled." She sighed and sat back on her heels. "Man, the screws are bent. Do you think maintenance would fix this kind of thing?"

"It's your bookcase, not theirs', so probably not. Just get Cory's dad to fix it."

"Yeah, maybe. Though what I really need to do is figure out how to do basic repairs myself. This way I won't have to wait for someone else to fix it for me. Why didn't they ever cover this kind of stuff in home economics class?"

"You're talking to a guy who never had much of a home and definitely didn't have any economics. And as for taking classes," he said with a chuckle, "well-"

"What are you doing here, Shawn? If you're here to whine about Angela, you've come to the wrong person."

"I only-"

"I love you and I'm always going to want good things for you, but right now? My priority in this saga is repairing my relationship with my best friend, so: Team Angela."

"Got it." He stood and shoved his hands into his pockets. "But I only came to see what the noise was."

"Oh. Sorry."

"That's okay. What are you doing back already? I thought you were in Pittsburgh until Thursday."

"That was the plan, but…I don't know. My parents were being weird. I couldn't take it anymore."

"Weird how?"

"They just weren't acting like themselves. They were distant. The whole time I was there I hardly spent time with both of them together. It was one or the other. They were barely even home at the same time."

He pulled out one of the desk chairs and took a seat. "Maybe they were having an argument and wanted to keep you out of it."

"Shawn, the only argument my parents have ever had was over who loved whom more. And that can hardly count because they both won."

"Anybody can have a fight. No one's perfect."

"My parents are," she insisted. "They're perfect together. Everything I know about love I learned from watching them. It's how I know Cory and I are perfect for each other."

"You and Cory are perfect together," he remarked. "I've watched you guys my whole life. It's how I know Angela and I are…" He saw her glare and shut up. "Sorry." He didn't know what it was Topanga wanted to hear. "Maybe it was just an off week."

"I hope you're right. They're coming to town in May to get into the meat of the wedding planning with me. I'm sure they'll be back to normal by then."

"Surrounded by you and Cory and all that nauseating love and happiness, how could they not get caught up in it?"

"What do you mean by nauseating?"

/

/

"This is so pathetic," Eric exclaimed, shaking his head in wonder.

"Hey, I told you I was only seven when I wrote this." Angela was draped across her bed in order to read over his shoulder. "Give me a break."

"No, it's not bad, it's actually really good. Who knew a tale about a chameleon with oversized sunglasses scared in the big city could be this interesting? I'm hooked."

"Then why did you say it was pathetic?" Why was she putting so much stock into his opinion of something she wrote in second grade?

"You wrote better at seven than I did at eighteen. Hell, this is better than I write now. That's pathetic." He turned his head slightly to look at her, wincing when the movement aggravated the sore muscles in his neck. "How were you this creative as a kid?"

"I don't know, not having any brothers or sisters or never being in a place long enough to make real friends, maybe? I had to come up with my own fun a lot of the time."

"Sorry."

"You don't have to be."

"Still, the story is good."

"I think you're exaggerating a little bit."

"Nope. Even I can understand what you were trying to say with this- at least on a deeper level."

"I was seven and it was a silly story about a chameleon. There is no deeper level."

"Really, I think the chameleon was you and the new city was every place you ever moved to."

Huh. "Still not seeing the deeper level."

"What are chameleons experts at?"

"Catching things with their tongues?"

"Blending in. They adapt to their surroundings and do their best not to stand out, attract no predators yet observe everything."

"And where do the sunglasses factor in?"

"Sometimes life gets too real and you need a comical prop."

She hated to admit it, but maybe there was subtext. Maybe the story was the way she tried to express feelings of fear regarding all the changes that were constantly happening in her life. Not that anyone took the time to see past the cute tale of a chameleon and his glasses- not even her. "All things considered I had it pretty good. I had a lot of fun seeing so many different places. It never occurred to me that I might be missing out on anything as a kid. I mean, after my mom left I knew what was missing, but other than that things were normal."

Other than that? "A lot of these one woman shows are more like one woman musicals. And some of these songs are pretty decent for a kid."

"My mother was a music teacher. She had dreams of making it big singing and playing piano- a walking cliché with stars in her eyes. Somewhere along the way she married a military man and had me. I don't think we factored into her plan for fame. Army moves weren't quite the traveling company she had in mind. For years after she left I was terrified that one day I would see her picture on television or on an album cover. It's bad enough I have to watch for her name on the back covers or song credits."

"What do you mean?"

"She may not be a household name, but she is a rather successful studio musician and background vocalist. I can almost guarantee you've heard her singing on the radio before."

"You know where she is?" For some reason he had been under the impression she didn't know her mother's whereabouts.

"Atlanta."

"And you never thought about going to-"

"No. There's not much to say to someone who signed away their right to be your mother."

Eric felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. He didn't know how he would handle it if his parents made the decision to legally not be his parents anymore. The dates on her writings jumped out at him. Little Angela had been very meticulous about dating things. "How old were you when she left?"

"Nine. She was a no-show to pick me up from school one day so they called my dad. When we got home there was a Dear John letter on the kitchen table along with her wedding rings, divorce papers, and papers to begin the process of relinquishing her rights to me. She didn't take anything aside from her clothes, other jewelry, and her piano. Turns out she had been planning it for months, but was a coward and couldn't face us. "

His heart broke for her, but he maintained his composure. If Angela could tell her story without breaking down, surely he could listen. "Is that why your songs and musicals stopped?"

"It was a long time before I wanted anything to do with music again." She dug through a box that was beside him on the floor, going until she reached the bottom. She pulled out a photograph and held it up to him.

"Wow," he said without thinking. "You look-"

"Just like her. I know. You have no idea what it's like to look in the mirror and see the reflection of someone you hate and wonder if there's a chance the similarities go beyond skin deep. That scares me more than anything."

Eric had no idea what to say to that. Instead of trying to find the right words, he simply held her hand.

She studied the photo she knew by heart. It had always been her favorite. Dad took it one evening after returning home from work. Her mother was at her piano and she was lying across the top. She couldn't have been more than two or three at the time. "When she had trouble getting me to sleep at night, she'd sit me on top of the piano so I could listen to her. My earliest memories are watching her from that piano top. For my fourth birthday she started teaching me to play. I got pretty good, too. She used to say that one day we'd have our own mother/daughter act, go on the road, and be famous. I didn't care about fame, I just loved being with her and playing together." Angela was taken aback by the tears that clouded her vision. She hadn't shed more than a few tears over her mother in years.

"I'm sorry."

"Funny thing is, to this day I still can't bring myself to touch a piano."

"Angela-"

"I want to. I'd love to. I miss it. But I can't. All my best memories of her are wrapped up in those keys."

Before he could formulate any sort of response, she released his hand and wrapped her arms around his neck. The position was unfortunately awkward as she was still on the mattress and he was sitting against the bed on the floor. Her hug could practically double as one of those sleeper holds he remembered from watching wrestling with Cory when they were kids. When his need for oxygen overwhelmed his desire to comfort her, he tapped her arm. "Angela?"

"Yeah?"

"Kinda can't breathe here."

She freed him from her grasp, sat up, and wiped her eyes. "Sorry. I guess this explains why I try not to get emotional."

"Angela, it's okay. I just figured I'd be more useful if I was conscious and breathing." He put his hand on her knee. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine. It's just been a long time since I looked through these boxes. That's all. It's so funny. I can't remember what her voice sounded like when she spoke, but her singing is echoing in my head right now. I thought I had forgotten that, too."

"Music has a way of sticking with us. Think about all the songs cataloged in our brains."

"I suppose so."

Eric looked at her old Eeyore alarm clock and saw that it was past lunchtime. He hasn't seen or heard her father at all today. That was unusual. "Where's your dad right now?" And why wasn't he going with Angela on this bittersweet trip down memory lane?

"Working."

"Really?"

"Don't worry, I knew about this from the time we first scheduled the visit. He had to give a speech at a conference. Why?"

Eric got up from the floor and sat beside her on the bed. "Well, you know…all those marksmanship certificates…"

She giggled. "What, afraid he'd get some ideas about you being alone with his daughter in her bedroom?"

All sorts of scenarios and conclusions her father could jump to came to mind. They each ended with him being in more physical pain than the previous one. "I didn't even think about that."

Angela grabbed onto his arm when he tried to get up. "Relax. He's not going to be home until late tonight, maybe tomorrow morning if things run long. And things always run long at these conferences." It almost felt like a weight had been lifted off of her. She'd long since decided that dwelling on her mother was pointless so there was no use talking about her. Maybe that had been a mistake. Or maybe she just needed the right audience. Talking to Eric was easy. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"You're not trying to fix things. All you did was listen to me. Anyone else would be flinging theories around about getting in touch with her and repairing our relationship. Or worse, they'd go behind my back to do it."

That definitely sounded like something Cory would try. "That's not my place. Besides, it sounds like she doesn't deserve you anyway."

"Thanks."

"But if there was a magic wand that let me fix things for you I would."

"And if it were possible I might let you. But the damage is done."

"What are you going to do now?"

"Same as before- I go on with my life and refuse to let her actions define me. Nothing's changed except for the fact that you now know the whole story." She was confused when Eric smiled at her and shook his head. "What?"

"If it were me I'd probably still be hiding under my bed, trying to make sense of life. You're amazing."

A self-conscious laugh escaped her. "I don't know about that."

"Trust me."

"My dad was my rock in those early years. This acceptance didn't happen overnight. Even now…there are still days I don't accept it and alternate between being bitter and angry at the world and wondering what was so wrong with me that my own mom didn't want me anymore. That usually happens around Mother's Day. Just a head's up."

"I'll try to remember that."

"Every year I swear I'll be better at distracting myself, but it never works out that way. The reminders end up creeping in."

"Maybe we'll plan something for that weekend," he said, putting his arm around her shoulders, "keep you really busy."

"I appreciate that, but I'm a big girl. I can handle it. You should spend Mother's Day celebrating your mom. She deserves it."

Eric nodded, feeling a renewed appreciation for his mother. "You know if you ever need to borrow her, you can. She's great at mom stuff."

"Thanks." She sighed and rested her head against his chest, noting how weird it wasn't when he wrapped his arms around her for a hug. Eric wasn't just easy to talk to. He was easy to be with. He genuinely cared about her, how she felt, and was interested in her opinions. That was more than she could say about her other friends lately. With them it was as if she only mattered as far as it related to Shawn. His wishes and his happiness apparently mattered more to them than hers'. Eric, on the other hand, made it his mission to help her see her dad. He made her laugh and, on more than one occasion, made her appreciate his offbeat view of the world. She certainly hoped she made him see things in a different light, too; mainly the dim light he used to cast on himself. He was more than the wacky sidekick…the comic relief. He had a brain and could be taken seriously. He'd just forgotten that for a while. When he ran his hand along her arm and she was surprised by the goosebumps that appeared.

"Cold?"

"Um…I guess so." She couldn't help but smile when his hand ran across her skin again, this time at a quicker pace in an attempt to warm her. He certainly did go the extra mile in his own unique, Eric way. "Thanks again…for listening, I mean."

"I'm sorry you had to go through all that."

"Like I've said before, it's life. I'm just playing the cards I was dealt. Luckily every so often the deck reshuffles and you can trade in some crappy cards for better ones."

He laughed. Though they were no longer locked in an embrace his arms remained loosely wrapped around her waist. She didn't seem to mind and he found that it was almost natural to be holding her. He shoved that last thought to the back of his mind. No need to analyze it and cause trouble. "You've really committed to the whole card game analogy, huh?"

"It works for me." Her hands were playing with the short sleeves of his T-shirt.

"Thanks for telling me…not just about the cards, but you know…your mom and showing me all your stories and stuff. I'm sure it's not easy and you're pretty private. I know this isn't something you share with just anybody. Thank you for trusting me enough."

"Thank you for being someone I can trust." She nearly cringed at the triteness of her words. "I don't have too many people like that in my life right now."

"I know what you mean." She was one of the few people he felt comfortable enough to be himself around. Though he realized it wasn't necessarily the fault of other people that that was the case. They were only reacting to the image he put out there; a false version of himself that was free from the expectations of others, free from the ability to disappoint them again. If he screwed up or did something stupid they didn't blame him. No, they blamed the crazy doppelganger that had taken his place. Angela though…she saw beyond the masquerade and dared him to be himself. And while it involved the occasional painful self-examination, she would accept nothing less.

She had intended to place an innocent peck on his cheek at the same moment he turned his head to say something. Their lips met in an awkward, almost kiss and they pulled apart at the contact the way one removed their hand from a hot pan.

They stared, each waiting for the other to make a move: say something, do something. The million reasons why this shouldn't happen may have gone unspoken, but they were hardly unknown. There was no good reason to go any further than they already had. And yet…

If, at a later date, they were pressed for details, neither Angela nor Eric could say exactly who kissed whom first.

For some reason she thought he would be more passive. She didn't know why. But as her back connected with the mattress she realized how wrong she was. His kisses were deep, demanding, almost daring her to match him in intensity. She couldn't help the involuntary shiver that took over as he ran his hands along her body and, as crazy as it sounded, she'd swear her ears were ringing. She dug her fingers into his back and wrapped a leg around his hips in an effort to keep him close. When he broke away to trail kisses along her neck, the nearly two weeks' worth of stubble tickled, but a gasp escaped her instead of the giggle she'd been expecting. She held his face in her hands and dragged his mouth back to hers'.

Eric would be lying if he said he'd never thought about what it would be like to kiss Angela. But he never acted on those desires….never even let on he occasionally thought of her like that. They were friends and it wasn't worth screwing up what they had on a few moments of lust on his part. Now, however, now he was wondering if he wasn't the only one with thoughts that went beyond the friend zone. Her response to him had certainly been encouraging to say the least. Her mouth was warm and inviting and he couldn't get enough, only breaking the kiss when he needed air. Even then he still kissed his way down her neck, smiling against her skin when he felt her racing pulse. He was going to continue lower, emboldened by her sighs and shivers, but she had other plans. The only thing stopping this moment from being perfect was the incessant ringing in the background. It stopped suddenly only to start up again seconds later, this time louder than before. It took a few moments to register that it wasn't any random noise. It was a phone- Angela's phone.

"Angela," he rasped out, pushing away from her slightly. "Angela, the phone."

"Wha-what's wrong? Why are you stopping?"

"Your phone is ringing."

"They'll call back."

His next thought practically had him fleeing the bed. "What if it's your dad?"

Her eyes flew open and she shoved Eric off of her. Phone, phone, where was the damn phone? She followed the noise to the pile of papers that must've been shoved to the floor. "Hello?"

"Angela, what took so long? Is everything all right?"

"Dad, hi, how's the conference," she asked with a little too much enthusiasm.

"Fine. I tried calling the house phone a few times and no one answered."

"Oh, I uh…I was listening to music in my room. I must've had it too loud."

"Is something wrong? Why do you sound out of breath?"

"I'm fine. I was just rushing around looking for my phone. It got mixed in with the box of all my old stories and creative writing assignments."

Eric shook his head at her lame excuse. He was a dead man. There was no way Sgt. Moore would buy that. He closed his eyes and tried to focus on Angela's part of the conversation instead of what had happened moments ago.

"Dinner? Okay, dad, sounds great. Yes, we'll be ready. Bye. My dad's coming home tonight," she said, setting her phone on the nightstand. "He's…" Eric was no longer in the room. She heard the shower running and lay back on her bed and covered her face with a pillow. What the hell did they almost do? More importantly, what were they going to do now?"


	7. Chapter 7

"We're going to see each other this summer, right," Angela asked, clinging to her father. "It's not going to be another year?"

"I promise you, baby, we will be together again soon."

"That's a promise you've made before."

"I've already been approved for the time off. The last couple weeks of June belong to you."

She smiled at him, still afraid to get her hopes up too much. "You mean I'll actually get to celebrate Father's day and my birthday with you?"

"We were together for both occasions last year."

"So that will make how many out of the past almost nineteen years?"

"Would you like a blood oath?"

"You got a piece of paper and a knife handy?"

There was an edge to her voice that left him wondering whether or not she was being sarcastic. He didn't have a chance to question her because Eric chose then to come back to the apartment from taking things out to the car. "All packed up," he questioned.

"Just about. Angela, did you have anything else to go down?"

"There's a bag on my bed, but I can-"

"I got it."

Alvin frowned as he took in the stilted interaction between them. It had been like this for the past couple of days. They weren't avoiding each other - just last night they watched a movie before Angela retired to her room, same as they had practically every night- but there was still a distance that hadn't been there before. He suspected something happened the day he was at his conference, but what he didn't know. Well, he wasn't sure he wanted to know exactly what occurred given the evidence, but still, something was amiss. "Sweetheart, did you and Eric have a fight?"

"No, we're fine."

He raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yes, dad." She stepped away and wandered around the living room under the guise of a last minute check for items she knew were already in the car. "We're just dreading the thirteen plus hour car ride back home. It's a long trip with not a whole lot of scenery."

"Is that why you've been acting strange since the day of my conference?" She didn't answer. "Look, I'm quite sure I don't want to know the details, but do I need to have a talk with Eric? Lay down the law and scare him half to death?"

"Only half to death?"

"He still needs to get the car back to his father."

Angela cracked a smile at his overprotectiveness. "No, you don't need to lay down any laws to Eric. It's…" She sighed, trying to find the right words. "It's going to be awkward going back home. We didn't tell our friends we were leaving. They're not going to be happy when we get back."

"Why would your friendship upset them?"

"Because we…it's…it just will."

"Is it just the friendship, or because there may be something more there?"

"What makes you say that?"

"The boy gave up his entire vacation to drive you 850 miles to see me. He pulled you out of the way of a semi in that storm. And he hasn't complained once about sleeping on the couch. I've seen the way he looks at you and the way you look at him. I've been watching you interact for almost two weeks. I'm not blind. I even noticed the hickey that, for the record, you did a much better job covering up yesterday."

Her hand flew to her neck and she turned beet red. "Dad-"

He shook his head. "Like I said, I don't need or want details. I do not like that something may have happened under my roof-"

"Nothing happened."

"-but I'm not naïve. You're an adult and are going to have adult relationships. But whatever happened, it doesn't sound like the kind of thing that happens between people who claim to be strictly friends."

"It's complicated."

"Because of people back in Philadelphia?"

"Because of a lot of things, including them….especially them."

"Angela-"

"Plus what if Eric and I got together and it didn't work out? I don't know if I want to take that chance. It would kill me if we weren't friends anymore."

"If you and Eric decide to keep things as they are and not risk your friendship on something more, that's one thing, but…will you do something for me?"

"What?"

"Put your own happiness first. Whatever happens, make sure you're doing it because it's right for you, not what's right for Shawn or Cory or anyone else…to hell with them." They played a part in hurting his daughter. As far as Alvin was concerned, their names were mud- at least that's how his mother would've put it. "I want you to be happy, baby, but you have to prioritize you. It's not your job to live your life in a way that will be less awkward for certain people. I'm not saying to go around acting like a jerk and make them miserable, but if you marginalize what you want just because it's easier than fighting for it…well, that's a wasted life."

She nodded. There was a lot to think about. "I guess I have some stuff to figure out. I need to talk to Eric, find out his feelings on things. Hell, I don't even know how I feel." They hadn't talked much since their make out session. "God, when did this get so complicated? I feel like I should've seen this coming, not be blindsided by it."

"You know I'm just a phone call away if you ever need me."

"I know. Thanks, dad."

/

/

"What do you think?"

"At least let me give you some money for-"

Sgt. Moore held up his hand and cut Eric off. "I told you I would take care of the tires and I am a man of my word."

He was crouched down examining the new wheels, which had been a surprise. "Yeah, but I only needed one, not-."

"The treads on the spare you put on look like they're wearing down a bit. You've got a long trip ahead of you and you're not driving in a car with my daughter on subpar tires. Besides, you got the flat because you were bringing Angela to see me. And since I can never thank you enough for your help there..."

"Tires," he asked, standing and clapping his hands together.

"Tires."

"You know, a fruit basket says it so much better."

"Matthews..."

"Aw, I'm just kidding, big guy. Come here!" He threw his arms around Angela's dad. "You're welcome."

Outwardly displaying emotion was not one of Alvin Moore's stronger attributes. He was many things, but a hugger was not one of them. He hugged Angela, hugged his sister, his mother when she was still alive, and when he was married he hugged his wife. That was about it. Needless to say he was positively flabbergasted when he found himself on the receiving end of a hug from his daughter's…friend. "What are you doing?"

"Thanking you for the tires."

"A fruit basket says it so much better," he deadpanned, using the young man's words against him.

"Sorry about that." Eric released the hug. "Thanks for the couch these past couple weeks."

"Thank you for helping me to spend time with my daughter."

"It was nothing."

"It was everything." He looked around to make sure Angela hadn't come outside yet. "You're a fine young man."

"And you're a…nifty older dude."

"I'm very glad my daughter has someone like you in her life."

"She's a good friend."

"Just don't hurt her."

"What does that mean?"

"It means if you hurt my daughter I will hurt you."

Eric frowned, unsure where all this was coming from. "Sir, I'm not-"

"I'm ready," Angela announced as she approached the car. "I think we got all our stuff."

"If I find anything I'll mail it to you." He almost laughed when he realized she had applied more cover-up to hide her hickey. He didn't see much point to it now. "I'll miss you," he said, hugging her again.

"I hate saying good-bye. It's always forever until we see each other again."

"It's just a couple months this time."

"We'll see."

"Angela, I mean it."

"Okay."

"And I am up for another transfer next year."

"To where? Alaska? Hawaii? Australia? Japan? The North Pole? Someplace even farther?"

"I'm using all the pull I have to try and get to a base in Pennsylvania. This way we wouldn't be more than two hours from each other."

"You mean it?"

He pulled some papers out of his back pocket and showed them to her. "See, my official request."

Angela quickly skimmed the paperwork. "You really did it. You asked the army for something and didn't just do what they wanted without question."

"I won't know for sure until next spring. And just in case you thought I was lying about June…" He handed over another paper. "…my approved request for the days off."

She was so happy she could cry. "I'm sorry, dad. It's just…"

"I have a bad track record, I know. But I'm trying."

"Thank you."

"You should probably get going. This way you won't be getting home too late."

"Right." She reluctantly moved away. "Bye, daddy."

"Oh, I almost forgot. I have a little going away present."

"You didn't have to get me anything."

"Good, because it's not for you, it's for him."

"For Eric?"

"Me?" Eric closed the trunk. He'd been hanging back, trying to give Angela and her dad a chance to say good-bye without him right there. "You have a present for me?" He was very confused when Sgt. Moore handing him a large, wrapped box complete with a shiny, red bow. "What is it?"

"Open it."

He held it up to his ear. "It's not ticking. That's always a good sign."

"Why would it be ticking?"

'Because I made out with your daughter in her room right under your nose,' he thought to himself. What he said out loud, however, was, "You know, reasons."

"Matthews, open the damn box!"

"Yes, sir." He made quick work of the wrapping paper and was even more confused when he saw the picture on the box. "You got me a tank?"

"Not just any tank. That's a replica M1A2 Abrams battle tank- the very tank you stood on when you trespassed in the field."

"Again, it was an accident." He read over the box. "Ooh, it's a remote controlled. Cool! Makes me wish I still had all my old GI Joe toys. You put batteries in the box, right?"

Alvin shook his head. He had intended the toy to be a joke. "Yes, batteries included."

"Score!"

"Now you can leave the real tanks to the pros."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

"I guess we should get going," Angela said reluctantly.

"Right. Bye, sir."

He held out his hand for a handshake. "Good-bye. Thank you again for getting Angela here."

"You're welcome."

"Drive safe, son, and I'm not talking about the tank. Though don't break that either."

"You don't have to worry."

Angela gave her dad one last hug. "I guess I'll see you this summer."

Alvin hated that she still sounded skeptical. "Definitely. You just be sure to call me when you make it home safe."

"I will."

/

/

"But what time did Angela say they would be back?"

Topanga rolled her eyes and suppressed a scream. Cory overheard her telling Rachel about her conversation with Angela and had been relentless ever since. She never planned on saying a word to him about it. "Before classes start up on Monday." She only got the call because Angela didn't want to scare her if they got back late and she was already in bed.

"Knock it off. I heard you tell Rachel they'd be back tonight."

"I said should be, not definitely would."

"Okay, so it might be late. Good, I'll tell Shawn and this gives him time to get flowers and candy and…hmm, I wonder if…"

"Cory, stop it. I know you still feel guilty for the stuff you said to Shawn, but-"

"I crushed his hope, Topanga. For a few days, because of me, he worried things with Angela were hopeless."

"You have to accept that maybe you told him the truth. Maybe it is over."

"Don't say that!"

"Wow," she muttered.

"What?"

"There's being optimistic and then there's complete delusion. You and Shawn are skyrocketing into delusional."

"What are you-"

"You need to stop it. I don't want to lose Angela as a friend and-"

"Why would you lose her as a friend?"

"I'd lose her because of my insufferable fiancé and his mopey sidekick."

He leaned back in his chair and stared at Topanga in shock. "What is the matter with you? Ever since you came back from Pittsburgh you've been on edge."

"I told you. It's my parents. Something's not right. I can feel it."

"I'm sure you're just overreacting. Your parents are the happiest, perkiest, most in love couple I know. Aside from us, that is."

"What about your parents?"

"They are not perky people."

"My parents definitely weren't perky this week."

He got up from the chair and took a seat beside her on the couch. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. "Maybe you're so used to seeing the perky, happy side that when they act like regular people it comes across as depressing."

"You think?"

"Yes, trust me, Topanga. It's all going to be okay."

"I'm going to hold you to that."

"Go right ahead, but you'll see, everything will work itself out. Me and you, your parents, my parents, Shawn and Angela: we'll be one big happy, coupley, family."

Topanga sighed and pulled away from him. "I'm going to proofread my philosophy paper again."

He watched her go, confused. "What did I say?"

/

/

Eric glanced at Angela out of the corner of his eye. They hadn't spoken since leaving her dad. A few tears were shed as the gates opened and they pulled off of the property, but she didn't say anything. She seemed to want quiet right now. However, he hated how awkward and heavy the silence felt. They haven't really talked since the thing in her room the other day. They hung around each other so her dad wouldn't think something was wrong, but words were kept to a minimum. After another twenty minutes passed silently, he knew he had to say something. "I'm sorry."

Angela turned to look at him, surprise evident on her face. "What on earth do you have to be sorry about?"

"I can see my parents every day if I wanted. You won't get to see your dad until the summer." He wouldn't even mention the decade it had been since she saw her mother. That went without saying.

"It's only a couple months. At least I know it won't be a year. I'll survive."

"Still, it's not fair."

"Who's the liar that told you that life was going to be fair?"

"It's not nice to call my mommy and daddy liars." He was relieved to get a smile out of her. "That's the scam they tried to sell me when I was a kid."

"I think when you're a kid you need to believe those lies for a while. Who would ever want to grow up otherwise?"

"Ha, growing up, there's another scam. When you're a kid you think it's all fun, late nights partying, and ice cream for dinner. They don't tell you about the bills and jobs and hard work involved. I remember getting my very first job when I was fifteen. I was a box boy at the grocery store where my dad was a manager. By the end of my first month I yelled at him."

"Why?"

"Because he and mom never showed us that having a job was hard. They always had something good to say about their day at work. I watched him almost every shift, never getting to sit down, having to sneak a lunch between problems, it was a lot. I whined over a four hour shift. He worked twice that every day and said nothing."

"They probably saved the complaining for when you kids weren't around."

"Probably." It was quiet again. He knew they had to talk about it. He couldn't imagine the entire trip home passing in torturous silence. "Angela-"

She said simultaneously, "Eric-" They laughed. "You go."

"No, it's okay. You."

"We really should talk about what happened in my room."

"I know. It was…some kiss."

"Yes, it was, but come on, Eric, that was way more than just a kiss. We were making out. You got farther with me than most of the guys I've dated."

He wasn't quite sure how to respond to that. "I guess I got caught up in the moment. I never should've let things go that far."

"Hey, it's not all on you. I was a very willing and extremely active participant."

"Yeah, but you were upset and talking about your mom and I-"

"You didn't take advantage of me. I knew exactly what was happening."

"And you didn't stop me." He wasn't sure if he was asking a question or stating the truth.

"Nope."

"Why?"

"Probably for the same reasons you didn't stop me."

"What reasons?"

"I asked you first."

"No you didn't."

"Uh…pretty sure I did."

"You said there were reasons, but you never asked what my reasons were."

"So I'm asking now."

"Then it's my turn to say I asked you first."

Though annoyed, Angela couldn't help but smirk at him. "I was curious."

"That's it? That's the only reason?"

"Does there need to be another?"

He returned his full focus to the road. "I guess not."

She realized that he seemed almost disappointed. "Your turn."

"My turn for what?"

"Why did you…why?"

"Same as you; I was curious."

There. They had each given the reasonable, if slightly unbelievable answer. Walk away now and no one got hurt, nothing became complicated. Things could stay exactly as they were. "Is that all?"

"Yep- curiosity; good thing we got it sorted out before it killed the cat, huh," he fired back with sarcasm.

Eric only became sarcastic with her when his feelings were hurt. Without over the top craziness it was the defense mechanism he fell back on. But why would his feelings be hurt? She gave the same answer he did. She sighed and leaned back in her seat. They hadn't gotten this far in their friendship by keeping things from each other. She didn't want to start now…no matter how uncomfortable it could get. "I have, occasionally, wondered what it would be like to kiss you."

"Really?"

"Yes. You're so sweet, kind, and funny. You have such a big heart and care a lot about people. Once I got to know the real you I wondered what it would be like."

"Oh."

"What about you?"

"I like you, Angela. You're a lot of fun. You're also beautiful and smart and you cared enough to see past my stupid behavior and insecurities. You remind me of who I can be beyond the craziness and fear and are always challenging me to do better."

"You think I'm beautiful?" Part of her cringed inside for choosing to focus on that particular compliment.

"Of course," he scoffed. "Why do you sound surprised? I've said it a bunch of times."

"No, you've called me hot, but that seems to be your go-to compliment for women. I listened to you call Rachel hot about a million times. There were others, too. It seems like a reflex for you."

"I didn't realize I did that."

"You do."

"I'm sorry. And you are beautiful."

She stared out the window, slightly embarrassed. "Thank you. Any other reasons?"

"It's your turn."

"If we're being completely honest here-"

"We are."

"Then we'd both admit that it's been a while since either one of us has been out on a real date." Angela hadn't dated anyone since Ron, and they only went out a couple times. He was a nice guy, but it had been too soon after Shawn for something serious. "So we were probably hard up for…we were ready to kiss somebody."

"It has been a while. To be honest, I've been having so much fun hanging out with you that I haven't even thought about dating."

"Me, too. We have been spending a lot of time together and it has been a lot of fun, the most fun I've had in a while." She laughed quietly to herself.

"What is it?"

"Most people would think we have been dating all this time. My dad did."

"It sort of feels that way sometimes," he answered.

"It does."

"What do we do now?"

"I'm not sure when it happened, but you've become one of my closest friends."

"You, too."

"What if things didn't work out and our friendship was ruined? I don't know how I'd handle that."

"Me either," he said quietly. That was what prevented him from trying anything before. He was terrified of screwing up the good thing they had going. "Plus it would be really strange at home. Imagine all the crap we'd get from Shawn and Cory. They'd never leave us alone. Shawn's kinda my friend, too. He used to be my roommate. Would us dating be wrong or break some sort of friend code?"

"I don't know."

"In a perfect world, where we didn't have to worry about our friendship or other people giving us shit…I'd date you in heartbeat."

Angela was stunned by his bluntness. "You would?"

"I really like you and we have a lot of fun together." He'd be able to deal with Cory and Shawn, but didn't want them to give her an even more difficult time than they already were. She already had to work at avoiding their attempts to reunite her with Shawn. Why paint an even bigger target on her back? "So, yes, I would."

"I would, too."

Eric laughed nervously. Never in a million years did he imagine they'd be having this conversation. It didn't occur to him that they'd be on the same page. Whenever he imagined this in his head it ended with anything from her laughing in his face to doing her best to let him down easy but promising to still be his friend. He never dreamed she'd feel the same way.

"So, what would you do in an imperfect world- this world- where there are complications and people who will likely be pains in the ass?"

"I'd still want to date you, but-"

"So our friendship is ruined anyway? We'd both be wondering what if?"

"I don't think anything has to be ruined."

"It would be different. We'll look at each other differently."

"That happened the minute I came up to you in the museum."

She smiled. It was hard to believe that was just a few months ago. "I suppose so."

"You know, we might be overthinking this."

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing needs to be decided now. Nothing has to change. We can keep hanging out and if we decide to…you know…then we do. If not, then no harm done."

"Yeah, except for the trauma from this conversation," she joked.

He chuckled. "Well, yeah, I'm afraid this trauma is irreversible."

"Is that what you really want?" She remembered her father's advice to put her own happiness first. "Just wait and see?"

"It makes the most sense." What he wanted was to say screw it and date her, but Shawn and Cory would never let up. He couldn't do that to her. "At least until the initial shit storm passes after we get home."

"That would be easiest."

"Yeah."

"Yeah."

/

/

Philadelphia: 100 miles. Angela sighed when she saw the sign. They were almost home. She'd gotten a call from Topanga earlier this afternoon telling her that Cory found out they were on their way. If Cory knew that meant Shawn knew. She could only imagine the scheme being cooked up. She was tempted to keep driving, go onto New York, Rhode Island, hell she's never been to Maine. Even going beyond into Canada didn't seem crazy to her at the moment. Her musings were halted when Eric started talking from the passenger seat. She smiled and wondered if he had any idea he talked in his sleep. Most of it was mumbled gibberish, but she was able to make out a few things. "Eric," she gently called out, rubbing the top of his leg. "Eric?"

"I'm telling mom and dad!" He sat up and looked around, momentarily forgetting where he was. Angela was staring at him, an amused look on her face. "What? I didn't drool, did I?"

"No, no drool, plenty of talking though."

"Huh?"

"You talk in your sleep."

"Still?"

"No one has ever said anything to you?"

"Not since I shared a room with Cory."

"Really?"

"It's not like I've had a lot of overnight company to tell me." He rubbed his eyes with one hand and reached for his travel mug of coffee with the other. "I didn't say anything embarrassing, did I?"

"Well…"

"What?"

"You, said, 'ow, my butt.'"

Why did he have to say that part out loud? "Oh. Anything else?"

"Who's Cornelius?"

He smirked and hesitated momentarily before answering. "Cory."

"No!"

"Cory's real name was Cornelius."

She had to pull over she was laughing so hard. "Why would your parents do that? Even to Cory?"

"I was just a little kid, but from what I remember, it was after a relative who was offering money to whoever named a baby after him. He never got married or had kids, but wanted a namesake."

"They sold Cory out for money?"

"Uncle Corny was a nice guy. He always had five dollars for me whenever we saw him. Mom and dad used the money to help buy the house."

"I can't believe Shawn or Topanga never told me."

"That's because they don't know. Cory changed his name when he was seven after me and all my friends teased him until he cried."

"Mean."

"I was a kid. Plus, I didn't know he'd cry. I'm not sure how Shawn and Topanga never found out, but they do not know."

Angela started to drive again. "So, why were you yelling at our dear Cornelius in your sleep? And why would you need to tell on him to your parents? And what the hell was going on with your butt?"

Eric closed his eyes and tried to remember his dream. "You were there."

"I was?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

"I don't know. We were at the museum and Cory jumped out of a painting."

"What do you mean he jumped out of a painting?"

"He jumped out of a painting. I can't get any clearer than that."

"But that doesn't make any sense."

"It's a dream! Those aren't supposed to make sense. You know that picture of the old couple with the rake?"

"American Gothic?"

"Yeah, that one! He was dressed as the old guy with the rake- bald cap, glasses, and everything. We were walking past it and he jumped out and tried to tackle me."

"And who was the old woman, Topanga?"

"No. Shawn was. He stabbed me with the rake."

"I guess that explains how you hurt your butt." She was quiet for a few seconds before continuing. "Are you up for a little dream interpretation?"

He shrugged. "Go for it."

"We were on a date and Cory and Shawn followed along and attacked us."

"They left you alone. I was the one they were after."

"Still, we were on a date."

"I guess." For the first time since he woke up he looked around to see where they were. "Almost home," he remarked, recognizing some of the landmarks.

"Almost home."

"Go to my parents' house, not school."

"Why?"

"I'll switch cars and get mine back from dad now. This way I don't have to worry about doing it this weekend. I think the car wash on Washington St. should still be open. We'll get it washed, too."

"That's very considerate of you."

He grinned at her. "I'm a considerate guy."

"Plus it's that's much longer until we have to face everyone else."

"That, too."

/

/

"Shawnie! There you are," Cory exclaimed as he ran into the Student Union. "What are you doing? Angela should be here any time now. I told you to get candy and flowers, maybe a potted plant. But you know what I see as I look around?"

"What?"

"Nothin'! Didn't you listen to me at all?"

"Of course I listened, Cor. It's a little hard to tune you out. But I don't think your advice would work. Angela's not really a candy and flowers type of girl."

"Did you try balloons?"

"I think I've got something even better."

"Oh, yeah? What? Let me see this."

Shawn held up his notebook. "It's a poem."

"You wrote her another poem?"

"Yes, I did."

"But Angela slapped you the last time you wrote a poem for her."

"That was because I wasn't being honest and was hiding my feelings. She knows how I feel now," he said confidently. "This time no slapping, only kissing."

"I don't know, Shawn. It's a risky move."

"I can't afford to play it safe."

"Can I read it?"

"No."

"Fine, but please tell me this one at least rhymes."

/

/

"You wandered onto a field of tanks?! How does that happen?"

Eric sighed. "I told you, it was an accident. I took a wrong turn."

"He thought the lieutenant leading cadence calls was giving him directions."

"You're lucky they weren't doing practice drills." Alan shook his head. "Only you, son."

"I'm just glad you made it there and back safely," Amy said. "Especially dealing with the storms and nearly getting hit by that semi?" She covered her face momentarily. "I don't even want to think of what could've happened to you two."

"Thanks to Eric nothing did," Angela stated, smiling at him.

"I think you're overselling it a little."

She squeezed his hand. "Not at all. Thank you for letting us use your car, Mr. Matthews. I'm sorry about the tire."

"It's not your fault. Flats can happen to anyone. Just let me know how much I owe your dad."

"He won't take your money. Eric tried before we left."

"That's true, I tried. He refused. I didn't even know he was going to give us tires. It was a surprise."

There was a knock at the back door. Moments later, Mr. Feeny let himself into the kitchen. "I see our intrepid travelers have returned. How was the trip?"

Eric shrugged. "Good. It was nice getting away from here. It had been too long since my last road trip."

"Which base did you visit?"

"Fort…Fort…I can't remember the name but it makes me hungry for soup."

Angela laughed and ran her hand along his arm. "Fort Campbell."

"That's it."

"Do you want soup? I have soup I can make you."

"No, mom, we're good." He leaned back and stretched, leaving his arm to rest across the back of Angela's chair. "We ate not too long ago."

"Did either one of you do your homework or do I need to start preparing for epic excuses?"

"All done, Feeny."

"Now, Eric, I'm sure Mr. Feeny doesn't mean that you simply wrote down the assignments, but actually completed them."

"I know that, dad. My homework's done, all of it."

He narrowed his eyes. "Really?"

"Yes, really," Angela intervened, feeling frustrated on his behalf. "He did it last week."

"Oh, well…good."

"Who knows, there might even be another B in there," Eric added.

"You got a B+ on that last English paper and I bet your history paper could be an A. You worked hard on it. It's good."

"Don't go getting too excited. I don't know about an A this time. Eventually, maybe."

She frowned. When she was listening to him go over the assignment and helping him with the flow and final touches he seemed pretty confident. Why was he selling himself short now? She was going to say something else in his defense, but he spoke before she got the chance.

"We should probably take off. It was a long drive."

"Of course, you must be tired and anxious to get to sleep in your own beds."

"I suppose." Angela stood slowly. She wasn't exactly in a rush to get back to campus, but exhaustion was catching up with her. "Thank you again for the car."

"Don't mention it."

"And I hope the t-shirts are okay." She and Eric had purchased souvenirs from the base for family and friends. "I know you're former navy."

"No, they're great, thanks. The only time the rivalry is real is during the big football game."

"Yeah, my dad gets insane around that time, too."

"So then the last thing we'd want to do is get our dads together during the game," Eric joked. "Because, no offense, dad, but I think Sgt. Moore could take you. He's like a giant or something."

"He is not," Angela said with a chuckle. "He's 6'5". That hardly breaks any records."

"Maybe not in the NBA, but in the real world…your dad's a giant."

She shook her head and smiled at him. "I'll tell him you said that. Then what are you going to do?"

"Warn the villagers he's coming and then run like hell?" He ducked the glove she tossed his way. "Hey."

"Yeah, you look real tough running from a glove."

"It could've hit me in the eye." Eric looked around, suddenly remembering his parents and Mr. Feeny were in the room. "Oh, yeah, Feeny, we got a shirt for you, too, but I can't remember where I packed it. I'll give it to you later."

"You didn't have to get me anything, but thank you."

"We were going to get a shirt for the dean, but Angela said a gift for a higher up person at school could be looked at as a bribe."

"Yes, that might be a gray area."

"Eh, I still got her a key chain. I think it's pretty much impossible to bribe with a key chain."

"Perhaps."

"Did you invite her over for spaghetti night," he quizzed his mentor with a wink and an elbow nudge to the ribs.

"Eric, for the last time, spaghetti night doesn't exist."

"So, no lunch, no dinner?"

"There were a few coffee breaks."

"That doesn't count. You've had coffee with that economics professor you can't stand. What is the dean supposed to think?" He shook his head, bewildered. "Do you want to be alone for the rest of your life? Well, alone aside from me."

"Angela, I don't suppose your father would take him back, would he?"

"Hey! I'm standing right here, Feeny."

"After the tank incident, it's doubtful," she replied.

Eric rolled his eyes. "That was an accident."

"We should be going. Let your parents get some sleep before the baby gets up again." She grabbed onto his arm and pulled him towards the door. "Maybe we'll luck out and every one will be asleep."

"I doubt it, but yeah, we should get that over with."

"Get what over with," Amy asked.

"Nothing, just twenty questions with Cory and the rest of the Scooby Doo gang."

"Good luck," Alan said, not quite understanding why they needed it.

"So long as it doesn't end with us needing bail money and an alibi I think we'll be good. Good night."

"Good night," the elder Matthews and Mr. Feeny responded in union. They were surprised when, moments later, Eric rushed back into the kitchen. He said nothing before enveloping his mother in a big hug.

"What was that for," she asked a few moments later.

"Just for being you…for being around. Oh, I told Angela she could borrow you for mom stuff. So keep your calendar open. Good night." He quickly disappeared into the yard.

"Well, that was sweet, if a little confusing."

"I didn't get a hug," Alan grumbled.

She ignored him. "Is it just me, or were they acting odd?"

"How do you mean?"

"The looks, the little touches, and I don't think their chairs could've been any closer. She was wearing Eric's sweatshirt."

"Maybe he let her borrow it."

"Eric doesn't lend out his clothes without practically writing up a contract for their safe return. And did you see the hickey?"

"What hickey?"

"The poorly covered one on Angela's neck. It wasn't noticeable when her hair was over her shoulder, but it was there." Alan and George admitted ignorance. She shook her head and mumbled under her breath, "men."

"But since when are they dating?"

"I have no idea. All I know is that things are about to get very messy."

"Why?"

"Please tell me you aren't this clueless."

"Apparently I am."

"Alan, who did Angela used to date."

"Shawn," he answered, her meaning suddenly becoming clear. "Oh."

"What are you whining about? You two are getting off easy. I'm going to be the one dealing with this soap opera while trying to teach."

"Right, you've got it much worse than we do."

/

/

"Home, sweet home," Eric declared as he pulled into a parking spot.

She sighed heavily. "Maybe we should've asked your parents to set aside bail money just in case."

He took her hand. "It's going to be okay."

"You think?"

"Eventually. I mean, tonight's going to suck, but-"

"So reassuring." Angela noticed him staring at her, one of those stares that felt like he could see into her soul. "What is it?"

He gave up on finding the right words and instead leaned in for a kiss. When she kissed him back he reached out and held her cheek in his hand, deepening it. It wasn't intense and hurried like a few days ago. It was slow, gentle. "Sorry," he whispered when they pulled apart a minute later.

She was puzzled, but not upset. "Don't be."

"If talking with everyone is as messy as we think it's going to be, we might as well have a nice memory from tonight."

"Is that all?" He wouldn't look her in the eye. "Eric?"

"I wanted to kiss you again. I know we're waiting to figure things out and see how it goes- and I'm fine with that. It's the smart thing to do. But I just…I wanted to do it before reality and the rest of the world smacked us in the face."

"I kind of wanted to, too. You were a little gutsier than me and made the first move." Angela exhaled, knowing in her heart that things just became complicated. Even if she and Eric remained strictly friends, the dynamics in their group were shifting. Nothing was going to be the same.

/

It wasn't a surprise to find their friends waiting around in the student union. Even Jack and Rachel were there. No one even bothered to bring books under the guise of studying or last minute homework. They were just sitting there, large cups of coffee in hand.

"Hi, guys." Angela wanted to run when the wall of noise assaulted her senses. They were all speaking at once, anxious for answers to their questions. It was giving her a headache and she realized she couldn't do this right now. "I know you have questions about our trip, but it was a long drive and we're too tired to discuss it tonight." She glanced at Eric instead of their audience and was relieved when he nodded in agreement. "We'll talk later."

"Later?!"

Cory jumped up. "You take off for almost two weeks and expect us to wait? We deserve answers now. And why are you wearing Eric's hoodie?"

"Cory, shut up," he fired back. "Tonight you get t-shirts, you get answers later."

"T-shirts? What the hell are you talking about?"

"We got souvenirs." Not wanting to give people a chance to respond, he opened a duffle bag and started flinging the shirts around the room. "You're welcome."

"But-"

"Come on," he said to Angela, "I'll help you get your stuff to your room."

She flashed him a grateful smile. "Thank you."

They were dumbfounded as they watched the pair go. This wasn't what they were expecting. Somehow, no one was surprised when Cory waited all of a few seconds before going after them.

"What are you doing," Topanga questioned.

"It's later now," was all he said. He caught up just as they reached Angela's and Topanga's dorm. "Seriously, you're just going to not say anything and walk away?"

"Yes." Angela opened the door so Eric could place the bags inside.

"But I want to know-"

"Look, Cornelius," she began, enjoying the shocked expression on her friend's face at the use of his old name, "we just spent more than half a day traveling. We're tired."

"How did you know that my name was Cornelius?"

Angela realized there were two ways to handle this. She could be mature or she could have fun. "Your brother talks in his sleep." She grinned when his jaw dropped.

"I…what…but you…"

Eric came back out into the hall. He'd heard the entire exchange and was biting the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. "Good night, Angela."

"Good night."

Once she disappeared into her dorm and shut the door he turned to face his brother. He punched him hard in the shoulder before walking away. "'Night, Cor!"


	8. Chapter 8

"What do you mean she wasn't in the room this morning?"

Topanga sighed and lie back on her fiancé's bed. "Angela was gone when I woke up. I can't get any clearer than that."

"Where did she go?"

"I don't know. She didn't leave a note this time."

"We have to track her down so we can get to the bottom of what's going on."

"Cory, I don't think bombarding her is going to help right now."

"But don't you remember what I told you she said? How else would she know Eric talks in his sleep unless she was in a position to hear him?"

"She guessed? A lot of people talk in their sleep."

"She was smirking when she said it- a naughty, 'I'm up to no good' smirk. Angela's not supposed to hear Eric talk in his sleep. It's supposed to be Shawn she hears."

"And we are now entering territory that is very much not our business. Don't you think you're reading too much into it?"

"Since when do I read too much into things?"

It was all Topanga could do to not laugh in his face. "How about every day of your life," she suggested as she sat up. "I have to go to the store and buy some index cards, high lighters, and a few other supplies. Come with me?"

"If I do, can we find Angela and talk to her?"

"If we happen to stumble upon Angela- fine, but we're not sniffing her out like those police dogs."

/

/

"Wow," Jack exclaimed as Eric stumbled down the stairs and into the living room of their apartment, "I was starting to think I'd have to go in there with an air horn to get you up. You had to be asleep for at least fourteen hours." He and Rachel got back to the apartment right after Eric last night and planned to quiz him then, but he was already passed out.

"It was a long trip. Haven't you ever heard of jet lag?"

"You drove."

"Fine, then car lag! What do you want?"

He slid a cup of coffee across the island. "Lighten up. Why the hell are you so cranky?"

"I'm allowed to be cranky first thing in the morning."

"Eric, it's one in the afternoon."

"I'm allowed to be cranky first thing in the afternoon."

"Seriously, what's going on?"

"Nothing, sorry I'm a grouch. For the past two weeks I've either slept on Sgt. Moore's couch or took naps in the car. My muscles haven't forgiven me yet. I though sleeping in my bed again would cure it, but it didn't."

"You stayed with Angela and her dad the whole time?"

"That wasn't my plan. I was going to drop Angela off and keep going, visit some places I've never been. But the weather was ugly and her dad said it would be stupid for me to try to find a hotel. By the time conditions cleared up and the risks for mudslides were over it would have been dumb to leave since by the time I got there I'd have to turn back, pick up Angela, and come home."

He nodded. "So, what's the deal with you and Angela?"

"We're…friends, friendly…friendish?"

"That last one's not a word. Are you guys-is something going on?"

Eric sat down on the stool and leaned his elbow against the island top, resting his face in his hand. "I don't know."

"How the hell do you not know? Either you're together or you're friends."

"There's room in between together and friends- a lot of room."

"What does that mean? Did something happen?"

"It's all right. You can stop pretending to be interested."

"What?"

"You don't want to listen to this."

"Where are you getting that?"

"Shawn's your brother and Angela used to date him."

"Yeah, and?"

"Why would you want to hear about me and Angela when he's still in love with her?"

"Because you're my best friend and Shawn…well, he's my brother, but he also screwed up. I'm neutral. Consider me Switzerland."

"We failed our project on Switzerland months ago, Jackie. I don't see how watches, chocolate, and cheese would help anyway."

He gaped at his friend. "Are you kidding me right now? Just tell me what's going on!"

Eric took an Oreo from the pack on the counter and twisted it around until the cream was exposed. "We kissed."

"Oh."

"And maybe some more stuff."

"You slept together?"

"No, but things were happening fast and I don't know if we would've have stopped if her dad didn't interrupt."

"He caught you," Jack asked, wincing in sympathy. "That happened to me once sophomore year in high school, only it was both parents. What was her name? Oh! Brenda! That's it: Brenda. Man, I thought her dad was gonna murder me."

He shook his head. "He called Angela to say his meeting finished early and he'd be home to take us out to dinner. Trust me, if he had caught the live show I'd be breathing out of a straw right now. He's a giant with awards for shooting guns."

"Huh?"

"He's in the army."

"Right. So her dad calls, she stops you, and-"

"I stopped things."

"Really?"

"She didn't hear the phone. I had to stop it."

"Wow." Jack watched as he continued to remove Oreos from the pack one by one and twist them open. "Could you knock it off? You're wasting the cookies."

He looked at the counter. "Oh, sorry."

"Have you and Angela talked about what happened?"

"We had a thirteen hour car ride home to kill."

"Is that a yes or a no?"

"We talked. We talked a lot."

"And?"

"And nothing. We're seeing how things go. It's complicated."

"But you want to date her?"

"Oh, yeah."

"And she wants to date you?" Eric nodded. "Then why aren't you- it's Shawn, isn't it?"

"It's everybody. Shawn and Cory already give her enough crap trying to fix her up with Shawn again. Could you imagine what she'd have to deal with if we were together? I can't put Angela through that."

"Don't you think you should let her decide if she can handle it?"

"Can we talk about something else? I need to try and not think about her for a while."

"You got it that bad, huh?"

"Is this changing the subject?"

"Sorry."

"How are you and Rachel?"

That certainly wasn't the new topic Jack had in mind. "We're good. You know, I've wanted to talk to you about us, but you've hardly been around the apartment lately- before you went out of town even."

"I know. I've been keeping busy."

"Look, man, nothing has to change just because me and Rachel are together. We're still roommates and if you're upset-"

"No, I was never upset about Rachel."

He frowned. "You weren't?"

"I thought I was, but I was talking to Angela and she helped me see that I was never in love with Rachel. It wasn't "losing" her that got to me. It was losing period."

"I don't get it."

"I lost the bet to you. Let's face it, we got pretty competitive. But I spent more time trying to make you look bad instead of getting Rachel to like me. I hate losing in general and didn't want to lose to you. But you won."

Jack smiled into his coffee. "Yeah, I did win, didn't I?"

"What bet?"

They turned around and saw Rachel standing by the front door. They hadn't heard her come in. "Oh, hey, Rach."

"Hi."

"How much of the conversation did you hear?"

"Enough to know I might not like the answer to my question, but I'll ask again anyway. What bet did you make?"

"Well, you see, we…"

"When you first moved in we made a bet to see who could get you to fall for them," Jack answered. Lying would get him nowhere at this point.

"You what?"

"It was right after you moved in. We didn't know you that well," Eric explained, trying to smooth things over.

She dropped her shopping bags onto the couch and walked further into the apartment. "That makes it all right? You made a bet, plotted behind my back, and acted like I was some trophy to be won."

"Sorry," the guys replied in unison.

"That's all you have to say?"

"Rach, look, were we jerks? Yeah, but that's old news. The better man won." Eric winced at his choice of words. "I mean you picked the guy who is a better match for you. It turns out I was more into the competition."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better? You never cared about me, even as a friend?"

"Of course I care about you. What I mean is I was focused on some superficial image. Jack got to know the real you."

"It's still a relationship started on a lie."

"Rachel-"

She stared at her boyfriend. "I need to think for a while."

"Can't we just-"

"Alone," she said, pointing at him. "You guys can put the groceries away. I bought stuff to make Eric's favorite foods as a sort of welcome home dinner, but I've lost my appetite." She ran up the stairs and to her room.

Jack punched Eric's arm. "Thanks a lot, man."

"Ow! What did I do?"

"You're the one who was talking about the bet!"

"I didn't know she was standing there. Besides, I thought you told her about it by now."

"Why the hell would I tell her something that would hurt her feelings?"

"You're right, Jack, it's much better that she overheard us talking about it instead."

"Shut up." He ran his hands through his hair. "I have to figure out of to fix this."

"You want help?"

"You've helped enough."

/

/

Angela shut her text book and closed her eyes, trying to digest all of the information she had just read. She had forgotten a book while packing to visit her dad and now hurried to get the assigned reading done in between her weekend errands. With her errands and reading now finished, what she really wanted was a nap. But a nap would mean chancing run-ins with people who wanted explanations and she still wasn't feeling up to talking just yet.

She woke up early, long before Topanga typically gets up, so she could slip away in peace and not have to play twenty questions. That she's managed to avoid Topanga, as well as Cory and Shawn the entire day was nothing short of a miracle. She knew it was inevitable, however, especially sitting here in the Student Union. Eric had mentioned yesterday that he was working a shift behind the coffee counter, but she couldn't remember what time he would be around. Angela was hoping to see him today. After spending the past couple weeks in such close quarters it was strange trying to go about her day without him right there. She even missed his breakfast routine, which included voicing the characters on the cereal boxes.

"Hi, Angela."

She turned around and wasn't entirely surprised to see Shawn standing there. There was a brown notebook clutched in his hands. "Hi."

"Can I-is it all right if I sit?"

"Sure, I guess so." She moved her books over to her side of the table. "What's up?"

"I was hoping to see you. There's a lot we have to talk about."

"You're right. There is."

"But first, there's something I want you to read."

"Really, what?"

"It's a poem…a poem I wrote for you." He shifted around nervously and held the book out to her.

"Oh, Shawn, I don't think-"

"Just read it. Please? Read it first before you say anything."

She sighed and reluctantly accepted the notebook.

/

"Ow, Cory, what are you-" They had been going to get some coffee when he stopped suddenly, causing her to crash into his back.

"Shh," he hissed in a loud whisper. "Topanga, look!" He stood in one of the entrances for the union, practically jumping up and down with glee. "Shawn and Angela! Shawn and Angela!" He wrapped his arm around his fiancée's shoulders. "We'll have to mark this date in the calendar: the day our best friends get back together. Can you feel it, Topanga? We're witnessing history."

Topanga tended to agree with him, though judging by the look on Angela's face, Cory's use of the word history had a totally different meaning than what was about to go down.

/

"Well," Shawn began nervously, "what do you think?"

"It's a lovely poem."

"And?"

"And I can tell you spent a lot of time on it."

This was not the reaction he had been hoping for. "Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

"Yeah, it's pretty impossible to miss." She sighed and placed the notebook back in front of him. "Look, Shawn-"

"No, me first. I know I made a lot of mistakes and I screwed everything up, but give me a chance. I want to make things right between us, to get back what we had. I still love you. Please, please give me the opportunity to prove it to you." He reached for her hand, but she leaned back. He frowned. "Angela, you believe me when I say that I love you...right?"

"I believe that you mean it today. Right now, yes, I have no doubts that you think you love me and want to be with me. But tell me, Shawn, how are you going to feel next week?"

"I don't under-"

"Or next month? Hell, tomorrow even? Will you still love me then?"

"What are you talking about? Of course I'm going to love you then. I'm going to love you forever...for the rest of my life." Shawn studied her face, looking for any indication that her walls were coming down. Her expression was unreadable. He'd get down on his hands and knees and beg if that's what it took to convince her. "Come on, you can't tell me you don't feel the same way."

"A part of me is always going to love you. I think that comes with the territory for a first love, but-"

"Angela, please, no buts."

"I'm not saying I'm perfect and that I've handled everything in our relationship the right way, because I know that's not true. But you have to learn from your mistakes and that's what I'm doing."

"I was a mistake? We were a mistake?"

"My mistake was letting you play my heart like a yo-yo for months in the name of figuring out who you are. That's not love- it's manipulation, even if you don't realize you're doing it."

"I was mixed up and confused. I thought I was missing out on something, that I needed to explore my options, but I was wrong. That time apart made me realize how much you meant to me."

"Funny, I never had to explore my options to realize your worth in my life."

"I'm sorry."

"You dragged me through hell. You can't tell someone you love them, kiss them, write poetry about them, but then back out at the last minute and say you're not ready."

"I'm sorry." He was getting the sinking feeling that no matter how many times he apologized it would never be enough. "I'm so sorry."

"I'm tired of hearing I'm sorry!" Angela shoved her books into her bag and moved to leave, but he blocked her way. "I took the chance and opened my heart to you on more than one occasion. You knew how difficult that was for me and yet you threw it back in my face every time like it meant nothing. It made me feel like I meant nothing."

"I-"

"And then...oh, here's the funniest part of this whole thing- all of a sudden you and Cory flip the script and start treating me like the bad guy, as if I was the one who ended things out of the blue and broke your heart. Talk about totally rewriting history."

"I thought the break up was mutual."

"What was I supposed to do? Get down on my hands and knees and beg you to stay with me? Yeah," she scoffed, "that's a dream. I have more self-respect than that. If you didn't want to be with me, fine. I've had enough people walk out in my life to know eventually that I would find a way to move on and deal."

"Y-you-you're over me?"

This time she took a few steps closer and took his hands. "I'm not trying to hurt you. I don't want to hurt you. But I'm done letting you hurt me. I'm done wondering which Shawn is going to show up today- the one who loves me or the one who needs space. I'm done being your emotional punching bag. I'm just...I'm done." She released his hands and tried to walk away.

"Angela-"

She shook her head. "It's over."

The finality in her tone and the look in her eyes scared the hell out of him. She sounded like she really meant it this time. Still, he had to try. He reached for her arm. "But-"

"Please. Stop. You wanted to explore your options and find out who you are? Great. Have fun. You are free to do so. Believe it or not I do hope you find whatever it is that you're looking for. I want you to be happy. But I'm not going to be in the wings waiting for you to get your shit together. I deserve better than that. I deserve someone who will treat me like their priority, not their back up plan."

"So because you and Eric decide to-"

"Eric has nothing to do with this. Leave him out of it. This is about you and me."

"You're not even going to give me a second chance?"

"Christmas was your second chance. You stood right here in this room and listened to me tell you how much I still loved you and wanted to be with you." She hated the tears that stung her eyes, but it was still a painful, embarrassing moment in her life. She had been so ready to believe him and didn't hesitate in opening her heart...only to be rejected yet again. "You kissed me and said you loved me, too. I thought we were getting back together. But then-"

"I was an idiot."

"Yeah, you were."

"But I-"

She shook her head and backed away from him. "I'll see you around."

"Angela, hang on just a second."

"Of course," she muttered, "this wouldn't be complete without getting Cory's opinion on our lives." She turned around and found Cory behind her. Topanga was there as well, though staying off to the side. "What is it? I'm assuming you heard everything." He said nothing, which irritated her more. "Come on, let me have it."

"I know Shawn hasn't always done the best job loving you, but don't you think you're being a little rash? I mean, give the guy a break. His dad just died and his mom left him. I think Shawn deserves a little grace period to get himself together."

"My mom walked out on me, too. Does that entitle me to special treatment in your eyes or is that a Shawn exclusive?" She hadn't been planning on dropping this bombshell, but if nothing else, maybe they would get off her case and shut up for a little bit.

That wasn't the response Cory had been expecting. "Excuse me?"

"I was nine. She dropped me off at school and I haven't seen her since. Her last words to me were, 'Bye, June bug, I love you. Have a good day.'"

"June bug?"

"Your mom left," Topanga asked, shocked she'd never said anything before. "Why didn't you ever say anything?"

She looked at the trio of faces before her. "Because I didn't want people to look at me the way you guys are right now. I don't need the poor Angela stares and comments. No pity needed here."

"But what about a little support?"

"It took a long time to come to terms with it, but I did. I'm not my mother and I refuse to let her actions dictate my life."

Shawn took a few steps forward, feeling braver with Cory and Topanga here. "Why didn't you say anything to me? You knew my mom was gone and my dad was in and out. Don't you think I would've understood and that it would bring us closer together?"

"I'm sure it would've, but I didn't want to be closer together…at least not because of that. I wanted to be closer to you and have a relationship because of who we were as individuals, not because of the people who left. You can't build a relationship on loss and dwelling on what's missing."

"But not talking about it isn't healthy either," Cory interjected, earning him an elbow in the ribs from his fiancée. "Ow!"

"We could've talked about it because we both know how it feels to be left by someone who was supposed to be there no matter what." So many of their previous conversations replayed in Shawn's head- it all made sense now. This was why she understood him so well. Angela always seemed to know what to say and when not to say anything. She had known exactly what he was going through because not only had she been there, but got through it at a younger age. "We could've helped each other. If I would've known I never-"

"You never what, never would've broken up with me? You would've stayed with me even though you weren't getting what you needed out of our relationship and decide to find yourself?"

"Well…I don't know. Maybe."

"There's a great love story for the ages- someone staying out of pity."

"It wouldn't have been pity. It would've been another sign that we're meant to be- it is a sign. We get each other and were brought together for a reason. Maybe I wouldn't have felt off last year and felt like I had to find myself if you would have-"

"And there you go again, twisting things around and making it my fault." She shook her head. "I've got to go. I still have things to do before classes start tomorrow."

"Angela," Cory called out, ignoring Topanga's glare. "There's just one thing I have to know. It's going to drive me crazy otherwise."

"I'm probably going to regret this. But what?"

"Why did your mom call you June bug?"

She nearly smiled she was so relieved it was an easy question. "My birthday is in June and when I was a baby my eyes looked too big for my face."

/

/

"…and Rachel heard all about the bet."

"Ouch. Poor Rachel." Angela leaned against the counter containing the various pastries that were left at the end of the day. "How is she doing?"

"She's not talking to me or Jack right now and Jack is pissed at me."

"Why?"

"I'm the one who mentioned the bet."

"I'm sorry."

Eric waved off her sympathy. "I'm sure it will work itself out…eventually I hope." He, too, leaned against the counter and was mere inches away from Angela. "It sounds like we both had sucky days."

"Right now is going well," she said with a smile. "Definite improvement."

"You're just saying that because I gave you the rest of the orange scones that were going to be tossed at the end of the night," he teased.

"Maybe a little bit." She checked the time and realized it was getting late. "I guess I should go and let you finish up here," She made no move to leave.

"I have the afternoon shift tomorrow." He came out from behind the counter and stood right in front of her. "So, if you come in around... say two o'clock there just might be a free cup of iced coffee with your name on it waiting behind the counter."

"Wow, it pays to have friends in high places."

"Totally. And who knows, if you play your cards right there could be a cheese Danish hanging around, too."

"So the coffee doesn't get lonely?"

He chuckled. It was nice having someone in on his jokes. It was nice having someone who didn't think he was a joke. "Careful, some people might say you've been spending too much time with me."

"I'll be the judge of that."

"Can I tell you something without you thinking it's weird?"

"Sure."

"I missed you today."

She smiled, touched that he felt comfortable enough to admit it. "Why would that be weird?" 

He shrugged and looked at everything except her. "I don't know."

Angela thought about it for all of a few seconds before she leaned forward and kissed his cheek. "I missed you, too. I'll see you, the coffee, and Danish tomorrow."

"We'll be here." Eric couldn't help but smile as he watched her walk away. The status of their relationship was still up in the air, but at least he had something to look forward to tomorrow. He picked up the tray to resume cleaning. When he turned around he was startled to find Cory standing directly behind him. "Ah!" The tray went flying and the mugs hit the floor. "What the hell is the matter with you, sneaking up like that? You're like that last scene in a horror movie where you think it's safe and then bam! Killer in your face."

He crouched down to help pick up the mess. "Sorry, I wasn't trying to scare you."

"Cor, even my shadow isn't that close to me. What do you want?"

"I need to talk to you." He had watched the entire exchange between his brother and Angela and didn't like it one bit.

"So talk."

He followed Eric to the counter. "Do you have to keep cleaning?"

"Yes."

"You can't stop for just a minute?"

"Nope." He turned away from his brother to load the dirty mugs into the dishwasher. "Now talk or get out."

"I want you to stop whatever you're doing with Angela." He took a step back when he heard the remaining mugs hit the counter. Eric was standing perfectly still, yet the tension coming from him was palpable. "You know, you guys...it's not right." When he turned around Cory was taken aback by the look on his face. He was more serious than Cory had witnessed in a long time.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You know how much Shawn still loves her. Has he screwed up massively in showing it? Yes, but he does and you know that."

"Mind your own business. Shawn and Angela broke up months ago. He's the one that did it."

"I know and he wants to make it right, but that's never going to happen if you try to start something."

"She's free to make her own choices. Trust me, I'm not doing anything with Angela that she doesn't want me to do." He was being deliberately vague. The more vague things were, the more Cory's mind could jump to insane conclusions and Eric had to get his fun in somewhere.

"How are you not understanding this? Shawn wants her back. Please don't stand in the way of that. Think of the consequences."

"What consequences?"

"Shawn will be miserable and-"

"Oh, right, and that should be everyone's main goal: making Shawn happy."

"Good," he said through a sigh of relief, "I'm glad we're on the same page."

"That was sarcasm, Cor."

"You don't want Shawn to be happy?"

"Sure, in that same way I hope for world peace- I want everyone to be happy. But his personal happiness is not my number one priority in life."

He shook his head, unable to believe how selfish Eric was being. "And where does Angela's happiness rank on your list of priorities?"

"Goodnight, Cory."

"She's out of your league anyway," he added in a last ditch effort to get his brother to see the light.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Angela's too...she's cultured. She likes literature, poetry, classical music, and art."

"A lot of people like that stuff. I like art. And you know, once you realize how much classical music is in movies it's really not that bad because at least you can picture the scenes in your head when you're listening to it."

"I'm not talking about a Dr. Seuss, Mother Goose, and finger painting level of culture here. Hey, why don't you find a girl who's into that?"

"Is that what you think of me: Dr. Seuss and finger painting?"

"Well...yeah. Find a girl who likes that stuff, too. I'm sure she's out there."

Eric didn't know what to say. Sure, it wasn't completely Cory's fault that he thought his big brother was an idiot, but it still hurt to know he looked at him that way. Did a year or two of craziness erase everything that came before? "Goodnight, Cory."

"Wait a minute."

"What?"

"No matter how loopy you act I've always been able to depend on you to do the right thing when it counted. That's all I'm asking you to do right now. Think of Shawn. Think of how this could put a wedge in our group when we're forced to choose sides. Why would you want to put everyone through that for a relationship that- let's be honest- is probably just a fling and won't last? So, come on, Eric, be the guy I know you still are inside and do the right thing."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Cory and Shawn aren't coming off great right now (and probably for the foreseeable future) but I'm trying to be realistic to their characters and how I think they'd act given the situation. I do have a plan, though.


	9. Chapter 9

Topanga tossed and turned, unable to get comfortable in bed. Then again, she supposed that wasn't a completely accurate statement. Her body was settled, but her mind was doing somersaults and jumping jacks. She glanced at the clock on her nightstand, both frustrated and relieved it was barely eleven. The night was passing slowly- frustrating. Yet this meant she still had plenty of time to sleep- relief. She looked across the room at Angela's empty bed. She said she had study group tonight for her chemistry class, but Topanga was suspicious. Her study groups never ran this late.

It had been a couple of days since the big encounter in the Student Union and it had been weird ever since. Well, make that weirder- because things had already been weird for far longer than anyone realized. Angela changed her seat in the classes they shared. Topanga tried to tell herself it was to create distance with Cory and Shawn, but she'd been willing to sit with them before, even after the initial break up. Now she was as far away from the three of them as she could get. It wasn't as though she had a chance to talk to Angela because she did her best to only be in the dorm to sleep. Even then, she typically left before Topanga could even hit the first snooze on her alarm clock and returned after she was already asleep. It was almost impressive considering Angela was the antithesis of a morning person. She was up early for class because she had to be, not because she wanted to be. She used to joke that it was her biggest act of rebellion against a military father who was always up with the sun and believed that sleeping past six was wasting the day. So, that she was waking up even earlier was a big deal- especially since it appeared she was waking to avoid her best friend.

She was about to get out of bed to get a book and do a little reading when she heard the door unlock and slowly open. She pretended to be asleep, watching as Angela carefully crept into the room, doing her best to make as little noise as possible. Topanga waited until she set her bag down and draped her coat across the back of the chair before she spoke. "I'm awake. You don't have to be quiet."

Angela gasped and her hand flew to her heart. "Don't do that!"

"Sorry." She sat up and switched on a lamp. "Study group sure ran late."

"Chemistry test on Monday." She dug through her drawer and pulled out the pajamas she was looking for. "How was your night?"

"Oh, you know, typical: dinner and conversation with Cory and then homework." Topanga left out the part about Cory whining over things with Eric. That was practically implied at this point. She raised her eyebrows in surprise when her friend pulled on a sweatshirt over her pajama tank. It was Eric's. She had been wearing it when they got back from visiting her dad, odd that she hadn't returned it yet.

Angela grabbed her toiletry bag before heading for the door. "I'm going to brush my teeth." She meandered in the bathroom, hoping to give Topanga enough time to fall asleep, or at least be too tired to talk. That hope was dashed when she returned to their room and found her friend more or less in the same position as when she left. Instead of initiating conversation, she put her things away and got into bed. "Goodnight."

"That's all you have to say?"

"Excuse me?"

"Have we drifted so far apart where our sole means of communication are basic pleasantries you'd use with any random person on the street? We're supposed to be best friends."

She sat up and leaned against the headboard. "Topanga-"

"There's so much going on in your life that you haven't told me about. I'm starting to feel as if I'm sharing a room with a stranger. It's like I don't even know who you are anymore. I'm not just talking about the stuff with Eric." She stared at her hands, which were folded in her lap. "Why didn't you tell me about your mom?"

"I told you why. I didn't want the pity. I didn't need a big deal to be made over it and for you to fuss over me. It sucks and I hate her, but it's in the past. I'd rather move on with my life."

"I suppose I get that, but I'm sure there were moments where you were thinking about her: Mother's days, your prom, graduation-"

"What are you getting at, Topanga," she snapped, harsher than intended. She didn't need to be reminded of all the major life moments her mom missed- all the moments she would miss in the future- and all of her own accord.

"Nothing, I just… I would've listened and supported you in whatever way you needed."

"Would you have told Cory?"

"What?"

"One reason I didn't say anything was because I was afraid if I did, you'd tell Cory and then he'd tell Shawn. Especially once we were broken up- they'd use any commonality in order to force a reunion."

"I think I can be trusted to keep a secret."

"When Shawn confided in you that he still had feelings for me, you not only told Cory but got him to admit that I still had feelings for Shawn. Then you conspired to get us back together."

"I was always all for leaving you guys to work it out for yourselves. Cory was the butting in person."

"What about the "chance encounters" where we'd run into Cory and Shawn at the movies or getting some dinner, huh? Or the grocery store? And there was one time at the library. You can't tell me that meeting up there was the guys' idea."

"Okay, but-"

"And you insisted we act like a couple at every wedding we've crashed so you can steal ideas."

"We were gathering research and getting inspiration," she corrected. "I do not steal. Besides, you had to pretend to be a couple so we would fit in and not get anyone suspicious."

"You still forced me to pretend to be in a happy relationship with the person who broke my heart. Face it, while you aren't quite the Grade A interloper that your fiancé is, you hold your own in the meddling department. You tell Cory everything and he tells Shawn everything. You three are the worst version of the game telephone."

"If you really didn't want me to say anything, I would've kept quiet."

"I want to believe that but…look, it wasn't just you. I didn't tell anyone. I'm not the kind of person that spills her life story to every person she meets. I've never been that way."

"But I'm supposed to be your best friend. Most people tell their best friends about this kind of stuff." Her comment was met with silence. "Does Eric know?"

"Well…yeah. But I only told him recently."

"You believed you could trust him, but not me?"

"What do you want me to say, Topanga? It's complicated. We were at my dad's and I was looking through all this stuff from when I was a kid- all my old stories and some pictures. We started talking." She shoved her hands into the pocket of his hoodie. "Eric is so easy to talk to."

Topanga kicked the covers off and moved to the foot of her bed. "That's something else I wish you would've told me about- you and Eric."

"Hey, I never lied. I always told you exactly when I was going out with him."

"I thought you were joking."

"Why? Why is the idea so ludicrous?"

"You know exactly why! What would your reaction have been if I told you that you'd start hanging out with him before it actually happened?"

Angela had to admit that was a fair question. "Okay, maybe I would've had a hard time picturing it at first-"

"Exactly."

"-but it never, in all these months, occurred to you that maybe I was telling the truth?"

"Not once. I thought you had a new boyfriend you weren't ready for us to meet yet. Speaking of new boyfriends…is that where things are with you two?

"I…I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"It's complicated."

"How did it start? When?"

"We ran into each other right after New Years'." She gave Topanga an abridged cliff notes version of what happened that night at the museum and how they'd been getting together ever since.

"That postcard with the picture of the sand dunes on your bulletin board was from him?"

"Yes."

"And the dried rose in the bud vase on your desk?"

She nodded. "It's from the morning after that first night at the museum. Eric told you all he was going to be a magician. He made the flower appear out of thin air." She still isn't sure what compelled her to save the cream colored blossom. Perhaps because it was something pretty in an otherwise not so pretty time in her life. "He also offered to put Cory in a box and saw him in half for me."

Topanga had a vague memory of Eric's proclamation that he was going to devote his life to magic. It was impossible to forget the huge banner he made, not to mention the confetti that shot out of his sleeves. That was actually impressive. "Is there something going on between you two?" She pointed a finger at Angela when she hesitated. "And don't say you don't know."

"It's up in the air."

"Angela!"

"Fine," she began with a sigh, "I suppose there is something there, but we're not sure what we're going to do about it yet."

Her eyes were wide. "Oh." She didn't know why she was surprised. Maybe it was having confirmation of her suspicions. "And what is that something between you?"

"Topanga, I really don't-"

"I won't tell Cory. I swear!"

Angela was quiet for a few moments. She really did need to talk out what was going on with Eric with somebody. It would be nice to be able to share this kind of stuff with Topanga again, to act like best friends again. She missed her friend. "I like Eric," she admitted. "I really like him a lot."

"But what do you even see in him," Topanga exclaimed.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"

"I just meant-"

"Forget it. I knew you wouldn't want to hear this."

"No, wait, I'm sorry. It's just hard to picture, that's all. The Eric you describe? I could see it a couple of years ago. I don't know what happened to him, but he's like a completely different person. That Eric vanished."

"No, he didn't, Topanga. Trust me, he's still in there."

"Give me another chance to listen. Please?"

"Fine." She let out a long, drawn out breath, still not convinced this was a good idea. But she missed talking to Topanga and sharing things with her. "One more chance."

"Thank you."

"Eric is one of the sweetest, most caring people I have ever met. He's smart- sure it's in a bit of an offbeat way, but he is. He has such a creative view of the world. His imagination is off the charts. He's funny, generous, and he cares about other people. There is nothing he wouldn't do for family or one of his friends."

Regardless of whatever else was said tonight, Topanga knew those terms of endearment weren't used to describe merely a friend. "Sure, I…yes, that's true, but-"

"He cares about me," Angela continued quietly. "He cares about how I'm feeling. He respects my opinions and wants to know what I'm thinking because he's genuinely interested in me…only for me."

"Eric's not the only one who cares about you."

"Maybe not, but what he feels for me isn't dependent on how things go with Shawn. "

"Is that how you think I see you?"

"Can you blame me? All these months you and Cory are just non-stop Shawn this and Shawn that. 'Oh, Shawn's really sorry. He loves you. He's depressed without you. How can you not take him back after everything he's been through? His dad just died. His mom left. Just give him another chance, you'll see.' She fiddled with the strings on the hoodie, playing with them until they were even. "What Shawn wants, what he thinks, what he feels…that's what matters around here. Let's face it, if we weren't sharing a dorm we probably wouldn't even be friends anymore. Sides would've been picked long ago and I know what side of that fence I'd be on."

Topanga jumped up and was across the room in an instant. "Oh, Angela, that's not true. You're my best friend."

"You keep saying that, but I haven't felt like it lately."

"I suppose I just had this picture in my head of-"

"-Of the four of us together, two couples in love surviving college," she finished with a weary smile.

"How did you know?"

"You've said it a time or two or thirty million. And I know it's hard to let go of that image, but you have to. That ship has sailed."

"I suppose this explains why, even before going to your dad, you've been hanging around with other people from your classes."

"Am I not allowed to have friends outside of the group?"

"Of course you are, but I guess lately it feels like you're pulling away, like you don't want to be friends with us anymore."

"It's hard to want to be friends with people who don't listen to you."

Topanga nodded. She felt awful. How had she not realized how bad a friend she was being? She could tell Angela was pulling away, but didn't take the time to see how her own actions contributed. It was too easy to place the blame on Cory and Shawn. "I'm sorry."

"I know."

She took a deep breath. If one of Angela's complaints was that she wasn't being heard, Topanga was going to sit here and listen all night if needed, no matter what. "What's going on with you and Eric? Tell me everything."

"It's all right. You don't have to-"

"I want to. And I swear none of it will leave this room. I want to know what's going on in my best friend's life."

"Even if the very thought of it sends Cory into hysterics?"

"Please, what doesn't send Cory into hysterics?" They laughed. "So, you were saying that things are up in the air?"

"Yeah."

"Did something happen?"

"It's so funny, because I don't think either one of us gave any serious thought about being more than friends before last week. Why rock the boat, you know? Eric's cute, he's sweet, he's funny…but I wouldn't even let myself think of being anything other than his friend because I didn't want to risk wrecking our friendship. It turns out he was feeling the same."

"What changed from not wanting to take the risk to legitimately considering it?"

"We kissed." She hesitated before continuing. "And then some."

Topanga gasped. "You had sex?!"

"No, no, although…if my dad hadn't of called I'm not sure how far we would've gone."

"How far did you go? Give it to me in baseball terms."

"I…what?" Angela had never been much into sports. She searched her memory banks for the correlating terms. "Second base."

"It took me and Cory years before we got to second," she muttered to herself.

"It wasn't planned. The first kiss was an accident."

Topanga frowned, confused. "How do you kiss someone by accident? Lips don't exactly bump into each other without intention."

"Whether you believe it or not, the first one was accidental."

"What about the second one?"

Angela lay back on her bed. "Oh, there was nothing accidental about that."

"I don't know if I should be asking this, but how was it?"

"I didn't I realize I wondered what it would be like to kiss Eric until it happened, but I thought he'd be more timid, passive. I thought if anyone would be the aggressor, it would have to be me."

"And?"

"He definitely wasn't passive."

"Really?"

"He was very take charge."

"Oh. Okay, so you kissed and did some…second base things. Then what? Your dad called?"

She nodded. "He did."

"What did you guys do after that?"

"We didn't talk much until the car ride home a few days later." Angela stretched, feeling more uncomfortable the longer they talked. It did strike her as weird that she had no qualms about discussing kissing Eric, but divulging what they talked about made her hesitant. It seemed more personal. They were real with each other in those conversations, in ways they weren't able to be with other people. "Look, Topanga, I'm getting tired and my first class is at eight."

She looked at the time. "Oh, wow, it got late fast. My first class is at 8:30." She went back to her bed and turned off the lamp before she got under the covers. "Angela?"

"Huh?"

"Being with Eric-spending time with him- are you happy? Does he make you happy?"

Angela smiled slightly to herself in the dark. "Yes, he does. It's the happiest I've been in a long time. I'm not some damsel in distress who always needs a guy to take care of her, but damn it, it's nice to have that sometimes. It's nice to have a guy who wants to." She paused, not sure how to put her next thoughts into words. "A part of me is always going to love Shawn and I learned a lot from our relationship, but there was always so much drama going on. It was always complicated. He could never just enjoy the moment, which meant I was never able to enjoy the moment. I felt like I was constantly taking care of him and reassuring him that I loved him no matter how "damaged" he was. And in the end-"

"He rejected you and wanted new people," she finished, "at least until he didn't."

"Yeah."

"So who's the better kisser: Shawn or Eric?"

"Topanga!"

"What," she challenged with a smirk. "It's not like we've never discussed this kind of stuff."

"Fine, but side by side comparisons?"

"Come on."

"There was no better or worse. They were each amazing in different ways."

"That smells like a cop out."

"It's like trying to compare a really great cheeseburger with a really great brownie. Both are good in their own way, but impossible to compare. They each bring something different to the table."

"Who's the cheeseburger and who's the brownie?" She didn't get an answer. Topanga was silent for several moments before she spoke. "If Eric makes you happy and you guys decide you want to be together…you have my full support."

"Really?"

"There might be a little adjustment period involved, but yes."

Angela wanted to believe things would be that simple, that she would just be able to stand by and be supportive, but she knew it wouldn't be that easy. "Thanks."

/

/

Eric was staring out the window of the classroom. Spring was in full effect and it was shaping up to be a beautiful day. Actually, according to the weather report he'd watched this morning, it was supposed to be nice until next week. He wondered if Angela would like to have lunch outside one day. She'd long confessed she wasn't the most outdoorsy person, but lunch should be okay, right? He should also pick a day to bring Morgan to the park. He bought her rollerblades for her birthday a few weeks ago and promised to show her some tricks, but hadn't had the time. He looked up when the voice of his statistics professor invaded his thoughts. He quickly realized his fellow classmates were gone. He had zoned out after turning in a pop quiz. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I said I decided to grade your quiz right away since you were still around." She smiled and placed a paper in front of him. "Good work. If you keep improving at this rate I have no doubts you'll get a B on the final exam, if not a higher grade."

He stared down at the quiz. Most people probably wouldn't be thrilled with a C+, but when his previous grades were a little farther along in the alphabet, a C+ was a definite improvement. "Hey, if I had been one point higher it would've been a B-."

"Like I said; keep up the good work. It's not out of the realm of possibility that you could finish this class with a low B."

"You mean it's statistically possible?"

She chuckled at his joke. Whatever had caused the turnaround in his behavior and his attitude towards doing the work in class and being prepared- it was a relief. George Feeny often asked how Eric was doing and she had been happy to tell of his gradual, yet consistent improvement. And her fellow educator was relieved to hear it. "Yes, you just need to keep working for it."

"Thanks." Eric jumped up, grabbed his backpack, and raced for the door. He couldn't wait to show Angela that the study sessions and flash cards she put together for him actually paid off. It was the first pop quiz in a long time where he didn't panic when it was sprung on the class. True, he didn't ace it, but he actually felt confident he wouldn't fail. And he didn't.

He was so excited that he was about halfway down the hall before he realized he forgot the quiz in the classroom. He spun around to head back, and nearly took out a small group of students in the process. "Sorry."

/

/

"If the temperature of a reaction is increased by 20 degrees Celsius, the reaction rate will be..." Angela grumbled and went back to her notes. She was so much better with words. She'd hoped studying in the campus library would help her focus, but unfortunately it didn't make the words on the page make any more sense than they did before. Suddenly a shadow was cast over her pages.

"It's C: twenty times as fast."

She turned around to find the source of her eclipse. "What makes you say that? You're not even taking chemistry this year."

"When in doubt the answer is always C. Trust me. I don't know how many of Feeny's tests I passed just because I picked C."

She immediately went to the answer key in the back of the book. "I'm guessing you weren't acing those tests by randomly putting down C."

"Huh?"

"The answer is B, four times as fast." She scribbled down a few notes. "At least this proves I should trust my instincts. I knew it was B. I don't know why I changed it." He wasn't leaving. Instead he pulled up a chair and sat beside her. She closed her book. "What do you want, Cory?"

"Can we talk- friend to friend?"

Angela shifted in her seat so she was facing him. "I don't know, can we?"

"What does that mean?"

She sighed before repeating, "What do you want?"

"I need to talk to you about Shawn…about you and Shawn…about you and my brother."

"I believe I said everything I needed to say the other day."

"But, I-"

"Cory, seriously, do you even do anything else besides obsess about Shawn and bugging the crap out of me or is this your life now? If so, congratulations, you may be the first person to ever flunk out of college due to nosiness. And I'm not talking to you about your brother."

"What happened to the girl who told me she still loved Shawn and wanted to be with him?"

"That was what…seven or eight months ago? She finally had enough of being treated like garbage and decided to move on with her life. She was sick of being miserable and feeling bad about herself over some guy."

His eyes narrowed. "Some guy? Look, I know Shawn screwed up. He blew it big time-"

"Yes, he did. He hurt me. I was the wronged one."

"I know," he said quietly. The rational part of his brain knew his obsessing was bordering on insanity. He remembered how difficult the break up was on Angela and how she struggled. But this was Shawn. If you didn't go to bat for your best friend no matter how stupidly they behaved, who did you go to bat for?

"So why are you expecting me to bend over backwards to try and fix someone who screwed me over? If it was any other guy you'd be happy I was moving on."

"But it's not any other guy. Shawn doesn't have anyone. His dad's dead and his mom…well, who knows where Virna is. That's a hard thing to cope with."

"Gee, you don't say," she fired back sarcastically. "I had to deal with it when I was nine. Trust me, I get it."

"Then why are you making him suffer even more?"

It was all Angela could do not to slap him across the face. "I didn't do anything. Shawn broke up with me. He's the one who said he wasn't ready. What was I supposed to do, wait around until he was?"

"Well…I'm thinking…but yeah, if you really loved him you would've."

"Who the hell are you to tell me about anything I felt for Shawn?" She gathered her books and shoved them into her messenger bag. "You know nothing about the kind of relationship we had or what we meant to each other."

"I stood there alongside you and watched it all unfold. Trust me, I saw it all."

"You saw nothing. All you had was an outsider's view."

"Please, when it comes to Shawn I'm never an outsider. And vice versa is true."

"Our relationship was very different from yours' and Topanga's. You guys are still so sheltered and naïve and clueless. You may not see it now, but one day it's going to hit you hard and it will be a rude awakening." She didn't mean it as a threat. She was simply stating a fact. The little snow globe of fairytale perfection Cory and Topanga liked to imagine surrounded them wouldn't last forever. She hoped they endured when the time came and the glass cracked.

"What does that even mean? And why are we talking about me and Topanga? This is about you and Shawn."

"There is no more me and Shawn!"

"Shh!"

They gave apologetic looks to the librarian. "Cory," she continued, "you need to get over this."

"I can't just sit by and do nothing while my best friend is miserable. Do you really think you're going to find even a tenth of what you had with Shawn with Eric?"

"You know, I'm an only child so maybe I missed a few things on sibling dynamics, but aren't you supposed to be supportive of your brother and on his side? Or at the very least want the best for him?"

"Angela, it's me. I want the best for everybody. But you and Eric don't make sense. It's not right for you to be-"

She glared at him. "Tread carefully, Matthews. It is not your business if Eric and I are friends or otherwise. And you certainly don't get an opinion on what makes sense or is right for either one of us."

"Topanga and I are getting married soon. At least assuming she ever settles and picks a date we will be."

"Yeah, so?"

"Shawn's…I just don't want him to be all alone in the world. He deserves to be happy with the woman he loves."

"Do you want me to be happy? Does that matter to you at all?"

He frowned at her choice of words. Did Eric tell her about their conversation from the other night? "What kind of stupid question is that? We're friends."

"Yes or no, Cory."

"Yes, but-"

"Then let this go."

"Just like that?"

She snapped her fingers. "Just like that. Let it go and we can all move on with our lives. It's not my job to make Shawn happy. Frankly, it's not yours' either. The only person responsible for Shawn is Shawn. He's not going to be happy until he's ready to be." Her father's words echoed in her head. No one would prioritize her happiness except for her. This conversation was proving it. Why was she wasting her time trying to have a rational conversation with Cory? "I have to go."

"Angela, wait."

She slung her messenger bag over her shoulder and headed for the exit. "Goodbye, Cory."

"What are you doing with Eric?"

"What am I doing with Eric?"

"Yeah."

"You've got an imagination," she quipped, not bothering to turn back and look at his face. "Use it."

/

/

Eric strode down the hallway on his way to Angela's dorm. He wanted to show her the quiz before he had to head to the Student Union. He wasn't supposed to work today, but one of his coworkers asked if he could cover the first couple hours of her shift. He was about to knock when he heard voices coming from right across the hall. Cory and Shawn's door was ajar and he could hear everything.

/

"I don't know, Cor. I'm not sure coming at Angela this hard is a good idea. Maybe I should listen to Jack and give her a little space."

"Are you nuts?! Shawnie, do you or do you not want Angela back?"

"I want to be with her more than anything in the world. You know that."

"Then you need to show her that you're not giving up on her and your relationship. Maybe if she sees that you still have faith, hers' will come back."

"She changed seats in all our classes," he noted sadly. "If she gets any farther away she'll be on the ledge outside. Even after we broke up she still sat with us."

"See, she's giving herself space. You don't need to provide more of it." He paused, remembering Angela's demeanor in the library. "It wouldn't be the worst idea to let things calm down a little before making your next move though. Maybe give her a few days...or a week. Let her cool off."

"The thing that really gets me is I don't know what Eric's role in this is. We've never been that close, but I thought he was my friend. A friend doesn't move in on another friend's girl."

"Don't worry about it. If anything is happening, it's temporary- a fling, a rebound."

"You think?"

"This could be an act of revenge on her part. After all, you hurt her pretty bad."

"Thanks, man."

"Maybe she's subconsciously trying to hurt you by going after a friend."

"Huh, that sort of makes sense. How did you come up with that?"

"I paid attention in psychology class."

"Which day?" Cory hit his arm. "Ow."

"My brother has the attention span of a gnat and the maturity of a two year old that missed their nap. That won't be enough for someone like Angela long term."

Shawn shook his head. "Don't get me wrong, I know what Eric sees in her, but what the hell could Angela possibly see in him besides knowing it would hurt me?"

"Eric is always good when you need a laugh."

"That's true. You can always count on him to do something stupid that made you wonder why he was let out of the house without supervision."

/

Eric quietly crept back down the hall, not even bothering to knock on Angela's door.


	10. Chapter 10

George Feeny exited his back door and took a deep breath. The petunias he recently planted were coming along nicely and added a wonderful aroma to the evening air. He was about to head into his little greenhouse to do some necessary maintenance when a moving shadow caught his eye. It took all of a few seconds to identify the mystery visitor. "Eric, what are brings you here? Was I expecting you?"

"No."

"Is everything all right?"

"Great."

He was very quiet-monosyllabic even- which was not like him in the slightest. Normally George would hear him standing outside and shouting like a loon. "Are you sure about that?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're sitting alone in my backyard at dusk. That is not the typical greeting I get. Usually you're pounding on my door and bellowing my name."

"So you do like the Feeny call," Eric concluded.

"It's obnoxious."

"Mr. Feeny, can we talk?"

"My door is always open, Eric." He took a seat in the other chair. "The floor is yours'."

"We're outside. No doors or floors here."

"Eric, speak."

"I'm a good person, right?"

That was not what George expected to come out of the young man's mouth. "Of course you-"

"I know I'm not the smartest and I don't always make the best decisions, but I like to think I'm an overall good guy. I try to help my family, my friends, and I keep you company so your only buddies aren't flowers. And I even did the Big Brother Program…at least until Tommy got adopted. But they told me as soon as I'm ready they can match me up with another kid."

"You are one of the finest people I know. Is your head in the clouds on occasion? Yes, but you do the right thing when it counts. You're there when people need you."

He wanted to be encouraged by Feeny's examples, but kept hearing Cory and Shawn over and over in his head. "Do you think I'm stupid?"

"Eric, you know the answer to that. I've told you before: you are one of the brightest students I've ever had the privilege of teaching and I truly believe you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. You could get passing grades in your sleep…and you have!"

"You're just saying that because it's your job to encourage me."

"I never say anything just to say it. Your issue is that you often succumb to fears and insecurities that manifest as laziness…extreme laziness. Do I think you're stupid? Not in the slightest. You're a young man trying to find his way in the world and who needs to have a little more faith in himself."

"Thanks," he replied half-heartedly.

"Where is this coming from?" Silence was his answer. "Does this have anything to do with Angela?"

"How did you know?"

"I have eyes. Not to mention things I overhear in the gossip mill that used to be my classroom."

"Cory and Shawn aren't giving her a hard time, are they?"

"I don't believe so, at least not while I'm within earshot. Now tell me what is at the root of this sudden self-examination? Actually," he added as he stood, "assist me in the greenhouse while you're telling me."

Eric eyed his mentor suspiciously. "You want my help with your plants?"

"What's so odd about that? You and your siblings have helped off and on over the years."

"There's fertilizer involved, isn't there?" He was always recruited to help when it was fertilizer time. Was there a hidden message in that?

"The bag is up against the side of the garage."

He sighed before getting up to retrieve the bag, scrunching up his face when the odor seeped out as he heaved it over his shoulder. "You know, Feeny, I was at the store the other day and they advertised this fertilizer that was guaranteed not to stink up everything in sight."

"No smell tends to mean synthetic. I prefer organic." George entered the greenhouse and switched on the overhead lights before going to check the temperature and humidity settings. "The plants seem to agree and it's a small price to pay for the beauty they provide."

"Why don't you just let stray cats wander through? Can't get any more organic than that."

"Enough with the fertilizer," he scolded, tossing a pair of gloves Eric's way. "Tell me what's on your mind."

He waited until they were well underway with the plants before speaking again. "I had a pop quiz in my statistics class today."

"Ah, I see. Well, if you'd like we can set aside some time to go over the material so you can do better next time."

"No, you don't understand. I did-well, it's not great, but it's better than the last couple pop quizzes. I got a C+."

Mr. Feeny smiled. True, he still believed Eric was capable of earning higher marks, but it showed progress, especially for a pop quiz. And statistics was a difficult course. "Congratulations. I'm relieved to see you're continuing on an upward trajectory."

"What? Look, I know it's not the best grade in the world, but it's not a tragedy."

He shook his head. "Trajectory, Eric."

"Speak in English, Feeny."

"You're onwards and upwards. Your grades are continuing to improve. That's a good thing."

"You could've just said that. Angela's study tips really pay off. I wasn't even nervous when Professor Hayes sprung the quiz at the end of class. And let me tell you, some people were seriously panicking. Even the brainiacs."

"Angela's been helping you study?"

"She made me flash cards and quizzed me when we were on the road. I never knew when a question was coming or what the subject would be."

"Good approach, keeps you on your toes."

"Yeah, she even figured out a way to relate a lot of the questions to either weather or TV and movies. It's so much easier to remember that way."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"You want to know something funny?"

"I'm all ears."

"When I got the quiz back the first thing I wanted to do was show Angela."

"She's been helping you study and you two have been cultivating quite a friendship. That doesn't seem funny to me."

"Normally the first person I want to show a sort of good grade to is you. Then eventually my parents, but not today."

"What did Angela say?"

"Nothing. I didn't get to show her the C yet."

"C+." It was obvious Eric didn't come over to discuss his grades. "Is there something else on your mind?"

"I like Angela…a lot."

Now they were getting somewhere. "I suspected as much." George picked up a pair of gardening shears and removed some dead leaves. "Have you talked to her about how you feel?"

"Oh, we talked the whole ride home."

"And does she feel the same?"

"Yeah, she does."

"Then I fail to see the issue."

"Other people are the issue." He tossed aside the trowel. "No matter what happens someone's going to be unhappy. If we decide to be more than friends people are going to turn against us. If we don't… Angela and I are going to be miserable. Are we wrong?" Eric paced between the rows of plants. "Mr. Feeny, is it wrong for me and Angela to get involved since she has a history with Shawn?"

"Eric, I can't answer that question. Only you and Angela can determine the boundaries of appropriate behavior here."

"English, Feeny!"

"You and Angela need to be the ones to decide if it's right and if you can live with the consequences."

"What would you do?"

He shook his head. "Again, this is not my decision. Honestly, I'm not sure there is a right or a wrong here. It is a gray area though, don't get me wrong. As far as Cory and Shawn go-"

"They would never let up. They already give Angela enough trouble. I don't to put her through that."

"Don't you think you should let Angela decide what she can put up with? She's never struck me as the type of young woman looking for a knight in shining armor to fight her battles and go in for the save."

"What does it say about me if I kind of want to do that? And I don't mean in a male chauvinist way, just…I don't know how to explain it. If I can make her smile, suddenly that's the highlight of my day." He forgot about the gardening gloves he was wearing and ran his hands through his hair. "I don't know when this happened. One night I'm wandering through the museum wanting peace and quiet from my friends and suddenly someone who was barely my friend before is all I can think about!"

"I hadn't realized how smitten with Angela you are."

"Huh? No, I already told you, I like her a lot." He took a seat on a stool and leaned against the wall. "I see a different side to her than how she is with everyone else. I guess I'm different with her, too. And when we were down by her dad she was relaxed, happy, and carefree even. She wasn't looking over her shoulder for the latest matchmaking scheme to hit. I liked being able to do that for her, to give her that peace."

"Smitten, amorous, besotted, bewitched, enchanted," he prattled on in a humorous, teasing tone, "captivated, fascinated, dazzled-"

"Mr. Feeny," Eric whined. "I need help!"

His expression became more serious and he carefully considered his next words. "If I may, there is one thing I feel the need to point out. I've known you most of your life; ever since your family moved in when you were four. I've watched you go through many phases and experiments trying to find your place in the world and who you are. It hasn't been perfect. There have been many challenges and you've tripped and fallen on your face more than once."

"You'd better be heading for a big finish."

"Something has changed in you these past few months. True, one might miss it at first glance because of your outrageous antics and behavior, but it's all in the details. Your grades have improved and you're more focused. You got a job at school and you still help your father at the store. Now that I know the timeline, I can see things started to come together when you began spending time with Angela. It seems you have found someone who brings out the best version of you and inspires you to strive even further. Believe me when I say that finding that type of connection and influence- be it romantic or otherwise- is no simple feat." He offered a kind smile and put his hand on Eric's shoulder. "I for one think you'd be a fool to let that go so easily."

"Even if people turn against us?"

"Very few things worth having come easily and you and Angela need to decide if a relationship is worth that risk."

Eric nodded slowly, processing his mentor's words. "I guess you're right. I need to go talk to Angela." He jumped up at ran for the door.

"Oh, Eric," Mr. Feeny called after him.

"Yeah?"

"Do you have time for one more piece of advice?"

"Shoot."

"Shower first. Then talk to her. Outside of those who live and work on farms, I doubt any romance began with the scent of fertilizer in the air."

He realized his clothes were dirty and he reeked. He held up his hands, which were still covered in the gardening gloves. "Did I touch my hair with these things?"

"Yes."

"Ah!" He threw the gloves to the ground. "Bye, Feeny! Thanks!"

/

/

"Just a second," Eric called out when the bell rang again. He quickly ran the towel over his hair. He wanted to get rid of the visitor and go see Angela before it got too late and he'd have to wait until tomorrow. He opened the door with the towel still covering his face. "Make it fast."

Angela was prepared for many things when she rang the bell: Jack answering, Rachel answering, even Shawn being there to see his brother. Eric coming to the door wearing his bathrobe with a towel on his head wasn't on that list. "Get all gussied up just for me? I'm flattered."

He quickly ditched the towel and tossed it behind him. "Oh, hi. I was-uh-I was just coming to see you."

"Dressed like that?"

"Well, no. I was gonna wear clothes and-and pants." He looked down, remembering his current state of undress. "I'll be right back. You can take whatever from the fridge if you want."

Once she was alone Angela wandered around the apartment. It was weird. This was the first time she's been here in months. So many memories of being here were wrapped up in Shawn. They made out. They watched movies. They celebrated Thanksgiving with family and friends. They loved here. They fought here. Eventually her gaze fell on the door and one of the worst of times came back to her. He shoved her against that door. True, he had been drunk and she knew he'd never soberly act that way, but it still scared the crap out of her when it happened. That wasn't why she was here, however. Angela was here because she was done with the past. She wanted to move towards the future. She did, however, need to know what role Eric wanted to play in that future.

"Sorry about that," Eric said as he came back into the room. He hesitated momentarily, trying to pick the best place to sit- with her on the couch or in the chair- before ultimate choosing the couch, though the opposite end of it.

"That's okay. So, why were you-"

He spoke simultaneously. "What are-" They laughed. "You go."

"No, it's okay."

"All right. I was going to ask what you're doing here. You?"

"Why were you coming to see me?"

Eric reached for his backpack on the side of the couch and took out his quiz. "I wanted to show you this. It's better than I've been doing on pop quizzes, especially in statistics."

She accepted the paper and smiled when she read it. "I knew you could do it."

"Let's not get too excited. It's still a C."

"C+ and only one percentage point below a B. I bet you get a B next time."

"We'll see."

"Stop selling yourself short. You're working hard and it's paying off."

Seeing her so enthusiastic made him a little more hopeful. "Professor Hayes did say if I keep it up it's not crazy to think I could end the year with a B, a low B, but still a B."

"That's great. I'm so proud of you." She handed the quiz back and shifted closer to him on the couch. "Tell you what, when you do finish the year with that B you'll get a night out, my treat. Seriously, whatever you want to do: dinner, museum, movie, concert…you pick. I'll even go to one of those blood and guts zombie movies you like so much."

"Really?" While she was fond of action and fight movies, Angela wasn't generally crazy about zombies. She'd willingly sit through one for him?

"You deserve it."

"So, this dinner and bloody zombie movie…would it be two friends hanging out or would it be a-a…"

"A date," she finished.

"Yeah, that."

"What do you want it to be?"

"I asked you first."

She took a deep breath. Her heart was beating so fast it was pounding in her ears. She was sure Eric could hear it as well. "I've been thinking a lot about us…our situation."

"So have I."

"You have?"

"It's been hard to think about anything else lately," he admitted, a sheepish expression on his face.

"For me, too."

"What have you been thinking?"

Angela sat up on her knees and stared at him. "I've been thinking about how much I like you. You treat me better than anyone has in a long time. I like the way I feel when I'm with you. I like the person I am."

"I like who I am with you, too. You encourage me and make me feel like maybe I'm not a total idiot."

"You're not, not at all. You're so smart. It just comes out in more creative ways."

Eric reached for her hands. "Are we saying what I think we're saying?"

"I am."

"Even if people give us hell?"

"If they're really our friends they'll get over it and learn to accept us in time. Besides, how will you ever know if something is worth having until you have to fight for it?"

Mr. Feeny said something very similar earlier this evening. "Good point."

They stared at each other, almost awkwardly until Eric began to laugh. "What is it," she questioned.

"I feel like I should have a varsity jacket to offer you or a class ring…something. I don't know, what's the college equivalent of deciding to be boyfriend and girlfriend?" He laughed again. "That sounds weird, too."

"You could agree that you're never getting your sweatshirt back."

"It's yours'."

"Thank you." Angela got as close to him as she could get and wrapped her arms around his neck. "You are forgetting one very big bonus to this whole boyfriend and girlfriend thing."

He rested his hands on her waist, hesitant at first. "What's that?" Her response wasn't verbal. She crushed her mouth against his and he wondered how a kiss could be gentle yet so passionate at the same time.

She broke the kiss just long enough to say, "We get to do this whenever we want."

When her hands tangled in his hair Eric tightened his hold on her hips and pulled her into his lap. "Definite bonus."

Angela wanted the little voice in her head- the one that said they were moving too fast- to shut up, but when she felt Eric's hands under her shirt and going up her back, she knew she had to listen to that voice and get control of the situation. It was too soon. She put her hands on his shoulders and reluctantly pushed away, pleased to see he looked just as bowled over as she felt. "We should slow down a little."

He leaned his head back and rested against the back of the couch. "Yeah, you're probably right."

"Just so you know, sex is…it's going to be a while."

That wasn't what Eric had been expecting her to say. Not that he was expecting anything. "I'm sorry, what?"

"We need to talk about it first: our pasts, safety, preferred methods of protection and birth control…all that stuff. Nothing happens until we have that conversation."

"I didn't think anything was going to happen tonight." Though, he wasn't going to lie, it thrilled him to know she was thinking ahead already.

"Good." Her hands played with the hair at the nape of his neck. "I just…I've been burned in the past by jumping all in too soon. It might be a while before I'm ready."

"That's okay. I'd never want to rush you into anything you're not ready for. Can I ask you something?"

Angela steeled herself for a question about just when she would be ready. "Sure."

"You don't have anything to do this Friday, right?"

"Um…no, no I don't," she stammered out, confused. "Why?"

"Because if we're together I think the only acceptable thing for me to do is take you out on a date."

She matched his smile. "That would be the only acceptable thing."

"In that case, will you go out with me on Friday?"

"I'd love to."

"Great. Be ready at 10AM."

"In the morning?"

"Is there another 10AM I don't know about?"

"What on earth could we be doing that early?"

"It's a surprise."

"Oh, I don't-"

"Come on, you said you loved my creative thinking and imagination."

"Yes," she slowly responded. "I did. But-"

He brought a finger to her lips. "No questions. Just trust me." He wasn't going to say anything else, but figured one tip was needed. "And wear comfortable shoes."


	11. Chapter 11

Rachel was coming down the hall when something flew out of Eric's room and landed at her feet. She picked it up and peered inside. There she saw her roommate standing in front of his mirror and talking to himself. That alone wasn't so unusual, but he had a shirt in each hand and a pair of pants over each shoulder. He took turns holding them up before ultimately tossing them aside as well. "I'm sure whatever disagreement is going on between you and your wardrobe can be worked out. No need to turn violent." She retrieved a white shirt from the floor and waved it. "They surrender."

Under normal circumstances Eric would probably be laughing at the joke, but not now. Right now he was fighting a case of butterflies in his stomach. Well, when he woke up this morning they were butterflies, but now it feels like they morphed into hummingbirds- hundreds and hundreds of hummingbirds. It was odd. He wasn't normally nervous. Though he hadn't slept well last night and he assumed that wasn't helping. He kept having dreams of all the different ways he could screw this up. "That's really not helping me right now." He went to his closet and took out another shirt. He briefly held it up before throwing it towards his bed.

"What are you doing?"

"I have a date."

"With who?"

"Angela."

She felt dumb for even asking once she heard his answer. "Oh, Jack didn't tell me that you guys were dating now. Not that it's a surprise. I saw how you were looking at each other when you got back."

"I didn't tell Jack yet. We wanted to get at least one date in without the risk of Cory and Shawn finding out and trying to follow us."

She could hardly blame them for that reasoning. "I think it is sweet you woke up early to fret over your date, but-"

"I didn't. I'm picking Angela up in-" He glanced at the alarm clock. "-crap, I only have an hour left. I knew I shouldn't have spent so much time on my hair!"

"You're taking her out this early? What is your plan, a matinee and an early bird lunch special? I know we're getting older, but don't rush it."

"Rach, if you're not going to help then, no offense, get the hell out."

Wow, he was nervous. "I will help if you tell me what you need."

"Isn't it obvious?" She shrugged. "I don't know what to wear," he exclaimed, gesturing wildly. "At first I was thinking the green shirt with my jeans, but then I thought maybe the red shirt with the khakis, but then I realized that my blue shirt with my brown pants was-"

"How many different outfits have you tried?"

He looked at the clothes scattered across the room and tried to remember all the combinations he'd tried. "Um…fourteen?"

"And coming from a guy that normally thinks he could make a potato sack work-"

"You can go now, Rach, but thanks for…oh, right…you did nothing! Thanks for that. I'll figure it out."

"Oh, sit down, you big baby. I'll help you. But first I need details."

"What details?"

"Where are you going for your date?"

"I can't tell you. It's a surprise."

"It's a surprise for Angela, not for me. You can tell me."

"You won't run and blab everything to her?"

She wanted to point out that the odds of her even seeing Angela today- let alone in this hour before their date- was slim to none. Instead she simply said, "I promise."

He hesitated for a few moments. "Okay." Eric leaned forward and whispered the details in her ear. "So, what do you think?"

Rachel wasn't sure why he felt the need to whisper. They were the only two in the apartment. Jack was in class all morning and manning the coffee counter in the Student Union this afternoon. "That sounds like a great first date."

"You think?"

"Very creative. Angela is going to love it."

"I hope so."

"Trust me. She will." She patted his arm before going over to the mess of clothes on his bed. "Wow."

"I told you nothing looked right."

"I'm sure we can find something suitable." She dug around the clothing pile to see what there was to work with. "Can I ask you something?"

"What?"

"Why are you so nervous?"

"Hello, first date remember?"

"It's Angela. You guys have been getting together for months."

"Yeah, but…first date," he repeated. "What we were doing before, that was just hanging out and having fun."

"And dating means good-bye to fun?"

No, but it's real now."

"Look at it this way: you've practically been dating for months."

He jumped up. "Oh, god, you mean I was supposed to be trying to impress her all that time, too?"

"No! Seriously, what the heck is going on in your head? I've never seen you nervous for a date, even the dates where it was obvious that there was never going to be a second. If anything you were almost too confident."

"Yeah, and look where that got me. I don't have the best luck with girls and dating. Things are usually good and fun at first, but then after a couple weeks they get tired of me." He picked up a pair of balled up socks and tossed them around. "Angela's different. She likes me- the real me. We spent two weeks together- a lot of that time tired and stuck in a car. It may come as a surprise to you, but I'm not always the wonderful person you see every day. I can be annoying."

"You don't say," she deadpanned.

"Don't get me wrong, it's not Cory levels, but still, I can be unpleasant and get on people's nerves."

"Did Angela get on your nerves?"

"Not really…well, maybe once or twice. But she wasn't that bad. She had control issues with the radio and tried to be crazy punctual when it was time to switch to her music- like she tried to change over in the middle of a song- but she was okay. We snapped at each other maybe once or twice."

"That sounds pretty good for a long car trip. You've seen each other in less than glowing circumstances and you still want to date. A lot of people never get to that level in a relationship because they bail the second things aren't happiness and perfection every moment. Seeing the less than perfect, human person scares them."

"Angela doesn't mind me being silly, goofy, and a little crazy, but it has to be genuine. She can see through any bullshit deflecting and not being authentic with her."

Genuine? Deflecting? Authentic? Rachel wasn't sure she had ever heard him talk like that before, well talk like that and have everything make sense. Before he would throw big words into conversations, but they were either used in wrong context or were the wrong words altogether. "Isn't that good?"

"It's scary." Eric watched as she mixed and matched a few options. He glanced at the clock every few seconds just to be sure he wasn't late. It occurred to him that this was the first conversation Rachel has initiated with him in at least a week. "Does this mean you're not mad anymore?"

"Mad about what?"

"The bet? You seemed pretty pissed."

"I wasn't really ma- okay, I was furious. But I talked it out with Jack and I understand why he was afraid to say something the more time went on."

"You know, just because things started as a competition, that doesn't mean the feelings were fake. Jack took the time to get to know you and he really cares about you."

"And how do you feel?"

"I care about you, too, at least as a friend."

"Me, too."

"So you and Jack are okay?"

"We're getting there. I'm not happy that our relationship started the way it did, but I realized I either had to accept it or not be with Jack anymore. And I'm not ready to throw in the towel just yet."

"Are we okay?"

"We will be."

"I'm really sorry."

"I know." She smiled and held up an outfit. "What do you think? This maroon button-down over a t-shirt and your darker blue jeans- casual yet put together."

"Do you like it?"

"I do. It says you care about your appearance yet didn't spend the entire morning worrying about your clothes."

"That last part is a lie."

"No one needs to know that. Don't be so nervous. You and Angela have been hanging out for months. You're just putting a proper label on the relationship."

"I suppose."

"It's going to go great and I want details when you get home. Date details, you can spare me the kissing stuff."

"Don't worry, Rach, I'll be sure to fill you in before I write all about it in my diary," he said sarcastically.

She hit his arm. "Did you need anything else? I have to run to the store. My backpack decided it couldn't hang on the last six weeks of school."

"No, I should be good now. Thanks."

"Anytime. I'll see you later. And remember…have fun."

Eric rushed around to finish getting ready. Maybe Rachel had a point. Maybe it would be easier to imagine they've been dating all this time. But if things didn't work out between him and Angela, it wouldn't be because of some idiotic behavior on his part. It would be because of him, the real him.

/

/

Angela examined her reflection in the portable vanity mirror that was on her desk, hoping she hadn't overdone her makeup. She opted for a more neutral lip gloss but played up her eyes just a little with a shimmery eyeshadow. Deciding what to wear had been trickier. It was a morning date and, while unusual, she assumed that automatically meant casual. Jeans? A skirt or dress? She appreciated that Eric wanted to surprise her, but she wished he'd given a hint, something to tell her how to prepare for their date. His advice to "wear comfortable shoes" didn't exactly help her. Hopefully her chosen outfit of a green abstract print dress that fell just above her knees, paired with a denim jacket and black Converse was acceptable.

Aside from the clothing choice she was rather calm. There were none of the nerves she'd expected; no apprehension, no second thoughts…nothing. Not that she was typically shaking like a leaf before a first date, but there had always been an uneasy feeling mixed with that anticipation. Would she like the guy? Would he like her? Would they have enough in common to be able to have a real conversation?

Maybe that was the benefit of starting out as friends first. She and Eric had the luxury of knowing they already liked each other and they always had plenty to talk about. They had a good time together. It was fun. And there was never any pressure.

She was double checking that everything was in her purse when her phone rang. "Hi, dad," she said, having checked the Caller ID before answering. "What's up?"

"I'm just returning your call from last night. Sorry I didn't get back to you earlier. It was a long day and I fell asleep before I even ate dinner."

"You shouldn't work so hard."

"It's the military, sweetheart. No half-assing anything."

"Something tells me even if you weren't in the military you wouldn't half-ass it."

He conceded her point. "You're welcome for passing my strong work ethic onto you. And as I said when you were here: I only have three years left. Once this contract is up that's it, I will retire."

Angela was quiet. He's been promising her he would retire and get another job for years. She wouldn't hold her breath. If he couldn't do it when she was a kid and needed him around, why would he be motivated to do it when she was virtually an adult? "We'll see."

"Angela, I-" He stopped himself, realizing that she would only believe his retirement was a fact when it actually happened. "What were you calling to tell me last night? You said something about me not being surprised?"

"Eric and I…we're together now. Or rather, we've decided we want to be together. He's actually picking me up for our first date in about twenty minutes."

"You're right. I'm not surprised. And what do you mean he's picking you up in twenty minutes? It's still morning."

"I know, but that's what he said. Neither one of us have Friday classes, so why not take advantage? He won't tell me where we're going because he wants it to be a surprise. Which, coming from Eric could mean anything from a trip to the museum to a personalized concert or magic show."

Alvin smiled at the enthusiasm in his daughter's voice. It was nice to hear her so happy. "Have fun and be careful."

"Okay, dad."

"I like Eric and I can see that you two care about each other, but if he hurts you he'll have to answer to me."

She chuckled. "I can take care of myself."

"I know," he stated in a slightly somber tone. "You've always known how to take care of yourself." She'd learned to be self-sufficient at a young age. She had to.

"You taught me well. You're insane crazy work ethic isn't the only thing you passed on. I'll call you later, okay?"

"Okay. I love you, sweetheart."

"I love you, too, dad. Bye." She put her phone in her purse and turned around to leave the room only to find Topanga standing in the doorway. "Oh! Hi, I didn't hear you come in."

"You and Eric are dating?"

"Yes. Were you eavesdropping?"

"I heard you when I came in. I didn't know entering our dorm was eavesdropping."

"What's your problem?"

"I don't have a problem."

"Really, because judging by your tone-"

"I thought we were telling each other things again. After our talk a few nights ago I figured that we were back on track…best friends."

"Topanga, it took us a while to get to that point and it will take some time to get back to it." Angela sighed. She really didn't have time for an argument. "Look, Eric and I didn't tell anyone yet. So if you look at it that way, you're the first to know! Well, second after my dad." Topanga still looked upset. "We wanted to at least have one date without having to look over our shoulders for Cory and Shawn. I'd love to think that they wouldn't spy and interfere, but-"

"And I'm just a big blabbermouth who tells her fiancé everything?" She crossed her arms and stared at the floor. "You can't trust me?"

"That's not what I meant. I just… we're all living in such close quarters and are all right on top of each other. Is it wrong that I wanted something kept to myself for a while? We're about to go on our first date. I'm sure you remember how exciting that is. Don't you think Eric and I deserve the chance to see where this goes without everyone all up in our faces?"

"You're right. I'm sorry." Topanga sat down on her bed and covered her face. "I'm just having a weird morning. I didn't mean to take it out on you."

Angela eyed the time. She had to meet Eric outside in fifteen minutes. "What's wrong?"

"No, really, it's okay. Have fun on your date."

She took a seat next to her friend. "Spill, girl."

"It's my parents."

"Are they still fighting?"

"They're still being weird. You know how they're supposed to be coming to town towards the end of May to help with wedding stuff so I can pick a date and finalize things?" Angela nodded. "Well, mom called and said it might just be her. Dad doesn't know if he can get the time off."

"He's got to work. That's understandable."

"We've had our 'wedding plan week' scheduled for a while. He had more than enough notice to get some time off."

She wrapped her arm around Topanga's shoulders. "I'm sorry, but every relationship hits a rough patch now and then. No one can be happy all the time."

"My parents are." She closed her eyes, willing herself not to cry. "Or at least they were."

"Tell you what, pick a day this weekend where it's just you and me. We'll do our nails, give each other facials, and just talk. We'll talk about everything."

"You and Eric don't have plans?"

"We're dating, not joined at the hip. At least not yet," she added with a smirk. "I'm making him wait a bit for that part." They laughed. "Okay?"

She smiled and wiped her eyes. "That sounds perfect. Now go! Go have fun on your date."

"Do I look okay- clothes and make-up aren't too much?"

"Where are you going?"

"I have no idea. All Eric told me was 10AM and to wear comfortable shoes."

Topanga gave her the thumbs up. "You look great."

"Thanks."

/

/

A couple hours later Angela and Eric were roaming the streets of New York City. He still had given her no details about his plans, so she was following his lead. She tried to catch a glimpse at the piece of paper he kept checking- she assumed they were directions- but he was quicker.

"Eric, come on. Give me something; a hint, a clue…something. Where are you taking me?"

"New York."

He'd been acting weird since he picked her up; quiet, jumpy, clumsy…not the way he normally acted when they were together. "Well, duh. I can see that. But where?"

"Just have a little patience. We're almost there….at least we should be."

"We should be? Eric, do you even know where-"

"Will you just be quiet and let me think for a minute," he snapped. "I'm not as smart as you. I can't try to read directions and listen at the same time."

She stopped walking and grabbed onto his arm. "Did you just tell me to be quiet?"

"Only so I could focus and not-" She turned on her heel and started walking away. "Hey, wait a second!" He rushed to catch up with her. "Wait. Angela, I'm sorry."

"Forget it."

"No...just…will you wait? Where are you going?"

"Home. I didn't come here to be yelled at." She spun back around to face him. "If you're having second thoughts about us just say so."

How the hell was he blowing this already? Before the date even started? This was a record even for him. "What are you talking about? I want to be with you." She seemed unmoved by his words. "Can we sit down and talk for a minute?" He gestured to a bench a few feet away. "Please?"

Angela was tempted to leave him standing in the street, but she also wanted to know why he was acting so odd. She walked over to the bench and sat down. "If you don't want to be here there's no one making you."

"I do want to be here."

"Then why have you been acting like a freaking weirdo?"

"Because I like you and want to be with you."

"You have a real funny way of showing it."

Eric sighed, unable to look her in the eye. "I'm sorry. I'm nervous. I'm not normally like this before a date, but this morning I woke up with thousands of butterflies that morphed into hummingbirds in my stomach. I guess the nerves turned me into sort of a jerk."

"Why are you nervous?"

"This is a date. I'm dating you. You're dating me. We're dating."

"And?"

"I suck at dating! I've been on dates with countless girls and most of them were over pretty quick. If I had a relationship last a month it was a miracle. I wasn't nervous before any of those dates. But with you I had nightmares all night of all the possible ways I could blow this."

She slid a little closer to him. "Go on."

"I really care about you and I don't want to do anything to screw this up. And then Cory and Shawn were-"

"What about them? What did they say to you?"

"To me? Nothing. I overheard them. It doesn't matter. I was an idiot for taking them seriously."

"Eric-"

"Really, let it go. But they were in the dreams watching me wreck this with sodas and popcorn like they were at a movie."

"Do you want to know what I was thinking last night and this morning?"

"Were you wondering how I'd screw it up, too?"

"Will you stop that self-deprecating, putting yourself down crap? I don't want to hear you talk like that."

"Sorry. I guess it's one of those self-preservation things they covered in the one psychology class I took. You know, make people laugh with you before they can laugh at you?"

She closed the gap between them. "You don't need to do that with me."

"I know. I'll try to remember."

"Can we get back to what I was thinking?" He nodded. "I was thinking about how, for once, I wasn't nervous."

"Really?"

"Yes. I was completely happy and looking forward to today."

"Until I ruined it?"

She ignored the comment. No need to further feed his fears. "I think there's something empowering about going after what you want. It's freeing. For the first time in a long time I'm putting my wants and my needs first. I'm not worrying about Shawn or what will make things easier and less dramatic on the group of us. I'm getting what I want and going after what will make me happy."

"And that's a relationship with me?"

Angela clasped his hand between hers'. "Yes. You make me happy and I can't wait to explore and see where this goes."

He squeezed her hand in return. "Me, too."

"And do you want to know the fastest way to not screw this up?"

"What?"

"Talk to me. If communication goes down we fail. Tell me when you're nervous or insecure because I can almost guarantee that I've been there and totally get what you're feeling. Relationship insecurity is a neighborhood I've visited often. Hell, I could give you the guided tour."

"You really haven't been nervous at all?"

"Of course I have, but mostly it's been good nervous, anticipation nervous."

Eric wrapped his arms around her and held her close. "I think what scares me most is losing our friendship if things don't go the way we want them to."

"Me, too."

"What do we do about that?"

"We put our friendship first. Don't get me wrong, we know all the perks of kissing and the hints of physical intimacy we've shared, but that's not a whole relationship. If we continue to work on our friendship in addition to everything else I'd like to think we'll be okay."

"And if it seems like we stop being friends?"

"Then I hope one of us is able to recognize it and we can sort things out-even if it means ending the romantic part-before we end up hating each other."

They sat quietly together for several long moments, ignoring the looks of passersby. "I'm sorry," he said, breaking the silence.

"You don't need to apologize anymore."

"I hate that I turned our first date into the day we also had our first fight."

"At least we got it out of the way. That's one less thing to worry about."

"I suppose."

"We've still got the whole day ahead of us. What was your plan?"

Eric dug the folded piece of paper out of his pocket. "I was going to take you to The New York Public Library."

"You were?"

"You said you've always wanted to go."

She grinned. "You remembered?"

"Of course. I wanted to do something you'd like, but leave it to me to get lost," he grumbled.

"Maybe I can help. Thanks to my dad I'm pretty good at directions." Angela took the paper and took turns looking at it and examining their surroundings. "You're not as lost as you think."

"What do you mean?"

"It's that building right there across the street."

"Oh…I knew that."

"Sure, you did," she remarked, growing serious when something occurred to her. "Are you sure this is where you want to go? We don't have to. We can find something else to do."

"But you've always wanted to see this place."

"I know, but you're not much of a library guy. This is our first date. Not just mine. I want it to be fun for you, too."

"Are you kidding me? We'll soon be in the same place Peter Venkmen and the other Ghostbusters stood. I know most of it was filmed in a studio in L.A., but some of it was here. Trust me, this is sacred space."

"Well, if you're sure…" She really did want to go inside.

"I am."

"Okay."

"So?" He stood before extending his hand to her.

"So what?"

"Would you like to continue this date with me? I promise it gets better."

She linked her arm though his. "There's nothing I want more."

"Then what are we waiting for?"

"You know," she began as they crossed the street, "I'm sure there must be other Ghostbusters sights nearby that we can check out. We can print them out on the library computer."

"Really?"

"Sure. I liked the movie, too."

"Promise me something?"

"What?"

"Don't roll your eyes if I tell someone, "Back off, man, I'm a scientist." I've always wanted to say that."

She chuckled, holding his arm tighter as they ascended the stairs. "You know it's going to be true one day, right?"

"What is?"

"You're majoring in environmental science. That means when you graduate you will-"

"-I'll be a scientist," he exclaimed, finishing her thought.

"That's right."

"That's so cool!" As they continued up the stairs, a man on his way down accidentally bumped into Eric's arm. "Back off man," he said, "I'm going to be a scientist."

Angela buried her face in his shoulder to hide her giggles from the poor, unsuspecting man as he hurried away. "Worth it?"

"This is the best day ever!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why a Ghostbusters-themed date? Why not? :-)


	12. Chapter 12

Topanga poked at her homemade face mask. "How much longer am I supposed to let this sit?"

"Ten minutes," Angela responded.

"And why did you get the strawberry mask while I got stuck with avocado?"

"Because I tend to break out in the warmer months and you said you needed to moisturize."

"Fine, but yours' smells good and I'm stuck smelling like guacamole. If anyone walks by with tortilla chips I'm in trouble."

"Topanga, it's only ten more minutes."

"Okay, you're right. Let's get back to you and Eric. Did he really take you on a Ghostbusters themed date?"

She lie back on the floor and propped her legs up on her bed. "He didn't intend for it to be Ghostbusters themed. He was just going to take me to the library. Looking up other movie sights was my idea."

"That doesn't sound romantic."

She frowned. "Eric put a lot of thought into coming up with something I would enjoy and remembered me saying I wanted to see the New York Public Library one day. I think it's very sweet that he remembered and pays attention to detail like that."

"Okay, but-"

"I didn't want the date to be all about me, so we checked out other locations- because I knew he would love it. Maybe it wasn't traditional romance, but it was so much fun, the most fun I have had in a long time." She examined her nails, admiring the way the dark red polish Topanga had chosen for her looked in the light. "We danced by the fountain in the middle of Lincoln Center as music from the orchestra practice filtered outside." She smiled as the afternoon replayed in her mind. Eric was a surprisingly decent dancer. He wouldn't be winning any talent contest trophies, but he could hold his own.

"You did?"

"I wasn't sure about it at first, but as Eric said: who cares if we looked ridiculous in front of a bunch of tourists we were never going to see again? Now they had a story to tell their families about the crazy couple they saw during their vacation in New York." She wrinkled her nose. Why did you always get itchy when you weren't able to scratch? "But please, tell me more about your latest dinner and movie exploits with Cory."

"What's your problem? Why are you getting an attitude?"

"You're being judgmental as hell and crapping all over my date."

"No, I'm not. I'm just trying to understand what made it so special."

"The entire time I was with Shawn- or even the couple times I went out with that guy, Ron- you never felt the need to analyze and understand why it was special to me."

"I went on a coffee run this morning."

"And?"

"Eric was working the counter."

She waited for Topanga to elaborate, but there were no other details forthcoming. "I'm going to need a little more information. He normally works in the Student Union Sunday mornings."

"He was determined to deliver croissants to some students by balancing the plate on his head like some sort of trained seal. Or a supermodel practicing their posture," she added after a beat of silence.

Though she now understood why he acted the way he did, Angela hated when he made himself look a fool. She knew it was insecurities and a deep-seated desire to be liked and accepted, but she wished he would go about it in ways other than making himself the butt of jokes. "Was he successful?"

"It took him two tries, but-"

"Only two?" She grinned. No need to delve deeper into this issue with Topanga. This was Eric's business. "Impressive."

Topanga frowned at her friend. "Seriously?"

"Are you kidding? I'd probably still be trying to balance the plate on my head."

"But he-"

"What happened to the friend who said she'd be supportive of me and my new relationship? Because you've already dissed my boyfriend and our date and we're not even two hours into girl time."

Boyfriend? They were using exclusive terms already? "I also said it would take me some time to get used to the situation. I want to see what you see in Eric. Really, I do. I'm trying to see it." She snapped her fingers. "I've got it. We'll double date. What better way to see what you see in him than to see how Eric is when he's with you?"

"Oh, I don't know."

"Why not? I can see this new and improved Eric and we can hang out again. I don't see any negatives."

"From where I stand there's one big, curly-headed elephant in the room just begging to be mentioned."

"What's wrong with Cory? Eric is his brother and you're his friend. He should be thrilled for you."

"'Should be,' being the operative phrase."

"What does that mean?"

"Don't play dumb. You know why this is a bad idea. Cory has spent every waking moment trying to reunite me with Shawn. Honestly, given the amount of time he has invested I'm shocked he hasn't flunked any classes."

"But what better way to get Cory over this fixation with you and Shawn than for him to see how good you and Eric are together?" Honestly, Topanga wanted to see them together, too, because try as she might, she still couldn't picture it. She wanted to. Angela's seemed so much happier lately and she knew Eric was the reason, but the image of the two of them didn't compute in her mind. They didn't fit. The term polar opposites may as well have been invented for them. She hoped seeing them interact as a couple would change that.

Angela debated her answer, trying to decide what would be the gentlest approach. She couldn't say what she really thought, that she feared letting Cory into this part of their lives would only make him more insane on Shawn's behalf. This needed to be done in a diplomatic fashion. "Maybe in a few weeks, okay? I need to talk to Eric about it first."

"But-"

"We're still getting used to dating each other and feeling this whole thing out. Besides, no one really knows that we're together yet. I mean, I told you and he told Rachel, but that's it. Well…actually, I think Mr. Feeny knows, too, but he knows everything so that shouldn't be a surprise."

"You are planning to tell people soon though, aren't you? This isn't something that can be kept secret forever."

She sighed in resignation. "Is that your way of saying you already blabbed to Cory but could only buy us limited silence?"

"No," she responded, not bothering to hide her offense that Angela even assumed such a thing. "I promised I wouldn't say anything and I haven't. I'm just reminding you that it's a very small world and things are bound to come out….especially when you consider that we all hang out in the Student Union and you guys aren't subtle about the way you look at each other."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm honestly amazed I never put it together before, but I've been thinking about whenever we've all been together over the past few months whether hanging out, getting coffee, or studying."

"You've got all those times cataloged in your brain?"

"I've got a good memory and, well, hindsight is a remarkable tool."

"And what do you remember?"

"I remember that before you guys even went to your dad you'd be watching Eric or he'd be sneaking looks at you."

"Really?"

"There was one day in particular when we were studying for our economics midterm and I asked to borrow your notes on the Federal Reserve and after the third time and you still didn't hear me I-"

"How do you even remember such a random moment?"

"It stood out because it was so odd. I turned around to see what had you distracted and you were watching Eric behind the counter. You weren't even subtle about it that time. You were practically gawking at him."

"I was?"

"I asked if everything was okay or if he was doing something crazy. You said he had been attempting to juggle coffee mugs again- only he was successful that time."

She didn't remember that. "And even after you caught me "gawking" at him and saw him sneaking glances at me you were still surprised that we started dating?"

"I thought he caught your attention by doing something stupid and Eric-like, not that he-"

Angela sat up. "Watch it," she warned, pointing a finger at her friend. "Don't ever call him stupid. Eric is not stupid."

"Okay, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that."

"He's creative and thinks outside of the box. I, for one, find it refreshing."

"All right, I get it. I'll be more careful with what I say."

"Thank you."

The next several seconds passed silently before Topanga spoke again. "So I guess you're pretty serious, huh?"

"What do you mean?"

"You and Eric? If you're this protective of him already-"

"Whether or not we're serious is beside the point. Even if he was some guy I just met on the street and decided to go out with once I'd like to think my friend would have enough respect for me to be nice and not call him stupid. Actually, you should respect Eric enough to not call him stupid. He's supposed to be your friend, too, after all."

"Angela-"

"I'm going to wash this stuff off my face." She grabbed a towel and hurried out of the room.

Topanga sighed and balled up a piece of paper before throwing it towards the garbage can. It danced around the rim before falling to the side. Why not? That pretty much summed up how it seemed her life was going lately. She was itching to be done with her first year of college, which was odd because she normally loved school, but summer couldn't get here fast enough. She hadn't been prepared for how challenging some of the courses would be and how strange living on her own would feel. Her parents were still acting odd. That was a distraction. And if Cory wasn't bugging her about Shawn and Angela he was on her to pick a date for the wedding and she couldn't do that until her parents came to town. Nothing was going right and no one was happy. She thought having a girls' day with her best friend would be the perfect remedy but apparently she couldn't say anything to Angela without putting her foot in her mouth. Topanga didn't mean to knock Eric. She truly wanted to see what her friend saw in him, but he's been acting like an idiot for so long. It would take more than a few days and a few conversations to change her perspective.

/

/

"Thanks for coming in! Don't forget our big sale on camping and fishing gear that kicks off Memorial Day weekend!" Alan cringed as soon as the customer was out of sight. He hated having to get those little shameless promotions in, essentially beg people to come back. But in all his years working retail he'd found that it often paid a lot to kiss a little ass. The bells above the door jingled again, but instead of a customer it was Eric. "Hi, son, what brings you in? Or should I say, how much?"

Eric rolled his eyes. "I'm not here because of money, dad. Or…not just because of money."

"What's going on?" The door jingled again, this time alerting him to the presence of his wife and infant son. "Is it family hour at the wilderness store?"

"Joshua actually napped this morning and was in a good mood so I thought we would get out of the house and bring you some lunch." Amy held up the bag with her free hand. "We got a little of everything from the deli around the corner." She looked to eldest. "Hi, Eric, this is a nice surprise. There's enough food for you, too, if you're hungry."

"No, thanks, mom, I'm just stopping by during the break between my morning and afternoon classes."

"How is school lately? You haven't said anything about grades. Didn't you turn in an English paper a couple weeks ago? I know Angela said she was sure it was an A even if you were thinking B."

"I got an A-. So it was an A…barely."

"That's fantastic! I'm so proud of you. I always knew if you settled down and focused that you could get-"

"I'm kind of pressed for time, mom, remember?"

"Right, so what did you want to talk to me about?"

"Well, since you're both here, I'll start with this: I'm dating Angela."

Alan took out his wallet and handed Amy a ten dollar bill. "You win."

She smiled. "Was there ever any doubt?"

Eric looked back and forth between his parents, confused. "You bet on us?"

"It's more like we wondered how long it would take you to start dating. We're not surprised it's happened."

He wasn't sure how to react to that. "Huh."

"Give us some credit. We noticed the way you two were acting when you dropped off dad's car a couple weeks ago. You were practically sitting on top of each other and constantly sneaking little looks and finding reasons to touch. Those are the telltale signs of a blossoming romance."

"Oh. I didn't even notice we were sending out signals to other people."

"You usually can't see it when you're in the middle of it. The other tipoff was that Angela was wearing your sweatshirt. I remember the fights that would break out between you and Cory when he would borrow something from your side of the closet without asking. Eventually you started making him sign a contract guaranteeing the safe return of your clothes." Amy shook her head at the memory.

"I got tired of getting my stuff back with chili dog stains or tire tracks from his bike. That's if they didn't get ripped playing sports."

"Still, I can't believe you wrote up a contract."

"It kept Cory's grubby hands off my stuff, didn't it?"

"After that you never let people borrow your things- outside of Morgan when she was little."

"So when Angela was wearing my hoodie…"

"That was unusual and my motherly instincts told me that something was going on."

"I told her she could keep it. What do your motherly instincts say about that?"

"They say that Angela must be very special to you."

He nodded. "She is."

"And you've considered everything?"

"What do you mean, dad?"

"Don't get me wrong, if you and Angela are happy then I am happy for you, but you have to know that this is going to cause drama with Shawn and Cory and maybe with your other friends, too."

He sighed and shoved his hands into his pockets. "I know. Trust me. I've already heard Cory whine all about it."

"Is he giving you a hard time? Because if he is we can talk to him and-"

"It's nothing I can't handle. If he starts bothering Angela he's going to be the one with the problem, though."

"Still, a relationship with Angela is worth risking friendships and causing Cory to be on your case?"

"We already talked about that. For us the bigger risk is never finding out where this could go because we were too afraid of what other people would think. Are we taking a chance? Yeah, but we're going after what we want instead of worrying about what other people think. We're putting ourselves first for once." Eric checked his watch. "Can I get to why I came over? I've only got an hour left before geology."

Alan glanced at his wife. Their son was being uncharacteristically serious today. "What's up?"

"I want some more hours around here, not just you calling whenever it's busy with twenty minutes notice and wanting me to show up. I need more money, but I want to earn it. I'm not asking for a handout. If you can't give me a more regular schedule, fine, but I need to know so I can try to beat the summer break job search rush." He ran his hands through his hair and chose to focus on the canoes displayed on the wall past his father instead of looking at him. He'd practiced the speech the entire drive over, but now it was a jumbled mess in his brain. The worst part was Eric didn't understand why talking to his parents like this made him so nervous now. Had he gotten so lost in his façade of craziness that being normal around anyone but Angela was beyond him now? "Working at the Student Union pays, but part of that goes towards tuition. I've got rent, insurance, gas, and I think it's time I start looking for a car you can actually start with a key and has airbags." Angela hadn't said anything, but he could tell she was a little nervous whenever she was a passenger in his car.

"I can always use the help around here. And hell, I miss hanging out with you."

"I was hoping to be on more of a partner level than employee. Let's face it you can hire a couple high school kids over the summer to work the register and do the crap work. I don't want to be just another person you're bossing around."

Alan's eyebrows were raised so high he was surprised they were still attached to his face. It was a relief to hear his son talking like this again, to be ambitious and taking things seriously instead of treating life like a game. "Sure."

"Great, because I'd hate to bring up that you and mom took more than half of my college fund to buy this place and use that to get my way. I know it was during the time when I didn't know what I was doing with my life, but..."

Amy glanced at her husband, unable to tell if his expression was one of pride, amusement, annoyance, or a combination of the three. "Wow, I thought we'd be picking a retirement home before you chose to hold that over our heads."

"Retirement home? Amy, please, I'm sure we'll be moving in with Eric."

"I don't know, dad. I'm not sure how much room I'll have once I take in Mr. Feeny."

The elder Matthews shook his head and smiled, wondering if his neighbor had any clue of the retirement plans that had apparently been made for him. "I'm sure we can work something out with the schedule and figuring out what your duties and salary will be. What's so funny," he asked when he heard Eric chuckle.

"You said duties," he responded, still laughing quietly.

Okay, maybe he wasn't completely grown up yet. "Like I said, we'll figure it out."

"And leave you with plenty of time for your schoolwork," Amy added. No need for his newly improved grades to suffer. "And you'll work with his schedule in the coffee house at the college, right, Alan?"

"Sure."

"Great. Thanks." This had gone better than Eric expected. "There's just one more thing."

"Oh?"

"No Fridays, at least not right away."

"Why not? I didn't think you had classes that day?"

"I don't. But Angela doesn't either and that's my regular day off from working the coffee counter. So even if the rest of the week is crazy busy and giving us hell, we have Fridays. Even before we started officially dating, Friday was our hangout day. Now it's date day."

"All right, no Fridays. Why don't you come over for dinner some night this week and we'll work on setting up a schedule for you."

"You can even bring Angela if you want," Amy interjected. "I'd love to get to know her better."

"I'll check with her and let you know." He looked at the time again. "I have to go. It's actually a fun lab today. We're studying out objects that were hit by lightning and seeing the damage it caused; like rocks and trees that were split open."

"That actually sounds interesting."

"Yeah, and if I don't get there early I'll get stuck in the back of the lab room with the crappy equipment, so bye."

They stared at each other for a few moments after Eric left, still trying to process the change in his attitude. "Wow."

"I'll say."

/

/

"…and we saw pieces of trees that exploded because the sap cooked inside after the lightning hit and it had to get out somewhere."

Angela smiled at him from her spot on the couch, watching as he went about the nightly clean up routine. She found that she joined him more often than not on the nights he closed the student union. It was more time to spend together. "That sounds pretty cool."

"And I though rocks would just be destroyed because you'd think if a tree snaps, what chance does a rock have, right?" She nodded. "Most of them just had a few burn marks."

"I think you've just convinced me to take a geology course next fall. You certainly talk about the class enough."

"Definitely do it. It's one of the best classes I've ever had. I wish they started covering geology stuff earlier. It would've made science classes in grade school and high school more fun." He hit a few buttons on the dishwasher. All that was left was the drying cycle. "I hate that I wasted so much time before."

"What do you mean?"

He came out from behind the counter and sat next to her on the couch. "It almost feels like a repeat of high school. I spent so much time goofing off and slacking on the work and now I'm playing catch up. But now that I'm taking things seriously I'm seeing how fun some subjects can be. I thought I learned my lesson when I barely graduated high school, but I didn't. I started goofing off the same way again."

"You got scared. You caught it in time. And look, you still have a whole year of college left to prove to yourself just how much you've got a handle on things."

"What's going to happen when I'm out there in the real world with a job? I can't play around and not do the work. I'll get fired, not given second, third, and fourth chances to get my shit together."

Angela draped her legs across his lap and held his hands. "I think your problem before was that you didn't know what was wrong and why you were acting the way you were. Now you know the signs and actually appreciate what happens when you put in the effort."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean I won't get scared again."

"Everyone gets scared sometimes. You just have to make sure you have someone in your life you feel comfortable talking out those fears with before you spin out."

He laced their fingers together. "Are you volunteering for that job?

"No."

His heart sank to his gut and he wanted to throw up. "No?"

"It's not a job. A job makes it sound like a meaningless obligation. I'm going to be there for you because I want to be. I want to help you and see you reach your full potential. That's one of the best parts of being in a relationship. We can grow together and help each other."

"Don't scare me like that. When you said no I thought maybe-"

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." She held his face in her hands and pulled him close for a kiss. "Better?"

"It's a start."

Angela kissed him once more before settling against his chest with her head resting over his heart. She pulled his arm around her and snuggled close. She felt safe. "I hate that the only times we get to be alone lately is when I hang around while you close up."

"You can always come to the apartment and hang out in my room. And get that look off your face," he continued, not even needing to look at her. "I have a TV in there. We can watch TV or a movie, listen to music…whatever."

"It's definitely more privacy than we'd get in my dorm."

"Especially with Cory sniffing around right across the hall," he added in a sarcastic tone.

"That's something we do need to talk about."

"What? Cory? Why?"

"No, not just Cory, everybody. We have to tell them about us. They already think something might be happening, but the longer we wait the more difficult it's going to be. And that conversation was always going to be…I'll say challenging."

Eric sighed. "I guess."

"What, you don't want to tell people?"

"It's not that, but I don't think I realized how much I enjoyed having our secret little friendship until we got back from your dad's and suddenly everyone was sticking their noses in our business. It was fun hiding in plain sight."

"I know what you mean. I miss it, too."

He held her a little tighter. "Maybe the talk won't be that bad. Rachel and Topanga already know and they're pretty rational."

"And you told Mr. Feeny, right? He can help put anyone in their place if they give us trouble."

"Yeah, they'll listen to him. Ooh, plus my parents know. I told them today when I talked to my dad about getting more hours at the store."

She sat up at looked at him. "And what did they have to say?"

"They seem happy for us. Oh, the next time I go to the house for dinner mom wants me to bring you along."

"Oh."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing…it's just that I've never really had to do a meet the parents thing with the person I'm dating."

"What are you talking about? You know my parents already."

"Yeah, but now it's different."

"Why?"

"Trust me, it just is."

He shrugged. "If you say so. Either way, it's still two more people on our side. That leaves telling Jack, Cory, and Shawn. I think Jack will be cool with it. The other two…we may need to go into the Witness Protection Program until things blow over."

"At least we'd have privacy," she joked before turning serious again. "I think I should talk to Shawn first. It seems mean to have him find out with an audience, even if it was an audience of close friends."

"I guess I can understand that. Are you sure you want to talk to him? I can do it."

"No, I will. He's going to take it bad no matter how he finds out, but I think it would be worse coming from you. I wouldn't want him to try and hit you."

"What, don't think I could take him?"

"That's beside the point. I'd like to avoid any physical altercations."

"I'd take a punch for you."

"That's sweet…I think…but completely unnecessary. I will handle it."

"Fine, but I will be nearby in case he takes it bad and you need backup."

"Backup for what?"

"We really need to work on your teamwork and compromising abilities."

Angela leaned up and kissed his cheek. "If it will make you feel better I will talk to him outside in the courtyard, okay?"

"Thank you." The dishwashers buzzed, meaning the last of the mugs were dry. "I should go put that stuff away."

"Need any help?"

"I think I got it." He reluctantly moved Angela's legs off of his lap and got up from the couch, going behind the counter.

She followed closely behind. "Can I watch?"

Eric laughed. "Dorm life so boring that you need to look at coffee cups and dessert plates? Maybe a few forks and spoons tossed in for variety?"

"Who said my eyes would be on the dishes?"

/

/

"Aw, man!"

Shawn stopped walking at the sound of his best friend's pained exclamation. They had just returned from the movies and were walking up to the school. "What's wrong?"

"Rocky road."

"Huh?"

"Rocky road, Shawn! Rocky road."

"I'll take possible titles of my autobiography for six hundred please, Alex," he responded with a smirk. "And make it a true Daily Double."

Cory rolled his eyes. "Do I look like I'm in the mood for Jeopardy humor right now?"

"I give up. What's the deal with rocky road?"

"You know how Topanga's been in a funk lately?"

"Yeah, she hasn't been herself."

"I was going to cheer her up and surprise her with a pint of her favorite ice cream but we walked right by the store and I forgot. How could I be so dumb?"

Shawn gave his best friend an incredulous look. "You know the store's not closed yet, right? Just turn around and walk the whole one block back."

He felt like an idiot. That hadn't even occurred to him. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"Probably because of overthink everything."

"Ha-ha. You coming?"

"Nah, it's been a long day. I'm going to try and finish that reading assignment for English then go to bed. I won't complain if a candy bar follows you home for me, though."

Cory nodded. "Got it."

Shawn was only half paying attention as he approached the Student Union, but as he was about to open the door some movement caught his eye. There were two figures standing by the counter and it took him no time at all to realize it was Eric and Angela. He was putting away the coffee mugs and she was just standing there, watching and talking. Something was different about her, but damned if he could put his finger on what it was. Shawn took a few steps back so he could continue to observe them without being seen.

It didn't seem real. He felt like he was caught in a bad dream and, any moment now, the Ghost of Relationship Future would pop up and present this scenario as inevitable if he didn't change his ways and become the man Angela deserved. But there were no ghosts arriving in a mysterious black cloak surrounded by fog to save him. This was happening. The nightmare was real.

Though he couldn't hear what was being said, conversation seemed to come easy to them and was punctuated with frequent smiles and laughter. Angela was a very tactile person and every time she ran a hand down Eric's arm, through his hair, or squeezed his fingers with her own Shawn remembered when it was him in that position. And he could almost feel the hair being brushed out of his face as her hand danced along his cheek.

It suddenly hit him what it was about Angela that seemed so different: she was smiling. She looked happy. He certainly hadn't given her much to smile about these past several months…ever since they started college actually. Shawn was about to open the doors and alert them to his presence, but when Eric pulled her closer in a move that could only lead to a kiss, he turned around and walked away.

/

/

"Feeny!"

George Feeny looked up from his newspaper at the sound of Eric's voice and was not surprised when the young man joined him at his table. "Good morning, Eric."

"Whatcha doin'?"

"I was enjoying the paper and a cup of coffee before my first class. Is there anything I can help you with?"

"No, but I can help you."

"I may regret asking, but how?"

"Do you want to know what would make that paper and coffee better?"

"What?"

"If the Dean was sitting here sharing it with you! Come on, man," he exclaimed, exasperated. "It's been months. "How have you made no progress?"

"Eric, if I were interested in Dean Bollander, and I'm not saying I am, but if I were, I would need to lay the groundwork."

"Dude, you're old. You don't have time for groundwork."

"Excuse me?!"

"Go get yours!"

"This is a lovely conversation for the girlfriend to walk in on," Angela stated as she approached the table. "Good morning, Mr. Feeny."

"Good morning, Angela. This is quite the project you've taken on."

"Hey!" Eric stood and placed a quick kiss on his girlfriend's lips. "I was just telling Feeny if he likes the Dean to tell her that."

"Oh, in that case I agree with Eric. Why waste time? What's the worst that could happen?"

"George," Dean Bollander called out from across the room, "George, good I'm glad I caught you."

"This is your cue." Eric nudged him with his elbow. "Go get her, tiger."

He took a deep breath and met her halfway. "Yes, how can I assist you?"

"First, if it is an inconvenience, just say so, but I was wondering if you'd be willing to have a guest speaker for one of your classes next week."

"Of course. Who did you have in mind?"

"My ex-husband, Curtis. He's an archeologist and just returned from a dig and has the most fascinating stories to tell and artifacts to share. I thought it would benefit your anthropology students before the final."

'Ex-husband,' Mr. Feeny thought to himself.

Eric, however, didn't keep his thoughts quiet. "You have an ex-husband?!"

"Eric!"

Lila laughed. "It's okay, Angela. Yes, Eric, I do. The marriage didn't work, but Curtis is still the most interesting person I have ever met. His stories are out of this world. Now, I really do need to call him. Thank you again, George."

"You're welcome," he stammered out, not knowing what else to say as he watched her leave. He was snapped out of his trance when Eric slapped his arm. "What are you doing?!"

"There's an ex-husband? Do you know what this means?"

"No, but I bet you'll tell me."

"It means….dun, dun, dunnnn! You have competition. Time to step up your game. For real now."

He looked to Angela. "I don't suppose you can inject a little sanity into the conversation?"

"Sorry, I'm with him: dun, dun, dunnnn!"


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mention in the chapter Mr. Feeny teaching an anthropology class only because I could never quite figure out what subject he was supposed to be teaching when they were in college and made my best guess based on what was discussed in class. If it's actually said, please let me know. Anthropology seemed to fit as well as anything else, lol.

When Angela and Topanga walked into their anthropology class Monday morning the last person they were expecting to see was Eric. "Eric, what are you doing here?"

"I missed you," he offered. "It's been forever."

"We literally just saw each other for breakfast."

"Oh? Well, that good-bye kiss you gave me did go on for a while. It must have robbed some oxygen from my brain and made me forget. I just had to see you again and refresh my memory." He flashed her his best smile. "Are you buying this at all?"

She matched Eric's grin, but shook her head. "Not a word."

"Damn."

"I appreciate the effort thought." She gave him a quick kiss before pulling back. "Now spill."

"Okay, I figured since my first class isn't until ten I would check out the Dean's evil ex and see exactly how much competition Feeny has."

"Eric-"

"Please? I'll be in the back and won't disturb the class."

"I don't know."

"I'll sit behind you and whisper in your ear and call you pretty."

"That would work for you, not me," she reminded him.

"I'll sit behind you, shoot threatening looks to the guy who drops his pencil by your desk every day and asks you to pick it up, and I'll work on the knot in your left shoulder you were complaining about."

"How about you trip the pencil guy?"

"Done."

"And I still get the shoulder massage?"

"Two hands, no waiting," he answered, holding up his hands.

"I'm sold. Topanga?"

"Well, I slept weird and have a little pinch in my neck that could use..." She realized both Angela and Eric were staring at her. "...I mean, so long as he stays quiet it should be fine."

/

"…and the cursed ruby of the Zau Kwai now resides in the Turkish Museum of Natural History diagonally across from The Hot Rod Café. The end!"

Eric sat bewildered as the class applauded and clamored for more of Dr. Kincaid's stories. And if he was up against anyone besides Mr. Feeny, Eric would be singing his praises as well, as much as he hated to admit it.

Topanga shook her head in awe. "That was…wow."

"Tell me about it," Angela agreed. "He's impressive. How many people do all that and live to tell the tale?"

"Hey, traitors, whose side are you on anyway?"

"You know we're Team Feeny, but there's something to be said for a man of action. I love Mr. Feeny, but he's a man of intellect. That's not a bad thing. It's good; different, but good."

"You're wrong. Feeny's a man of action! He's nothing but action. Watch, see…he's going back up to the podium. Get ready for some serious action."

"Thank you, Dr. Kincaid, for that, uh, vivid story that holds absolutely no bearing whatsoever on the rest of our curriculum. It does provide a fine transition to today's assignment."

"I believed in you," Eric cried out over the class's collective groan. "You're dying, man!"

He peered at his students from over his glasses. It didn't go unnoticed that they were no longer on the edge of their seats. They weren't clinging to his every word as they had for Dr. Kincaid. No, they were slouched in their chairs and watching the clock. "Eric, you're not even in this class."

"How can you expect the kids to learn by reading a book," the archeologist lamented to his ex-wife. "After you've had these experiences firsthand it's a little hard to swallow."

"George is a fine educator, Curtis."

"I suppose not everyone can be out there facing the wild unknown. As the saying goes, "those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. George clearly teaches."

Angela and Topanga each gave the guest lecturer the side eye. "Did he just-"

"Oh, yes, he did."

"No one talks about Mr. Feeny like that."

Eric breathed a sigh of relief. "Glad to have you back on the team, ladies. Just one question: how do we stop Indiana Jones? How do we help Feeny get the Dean? And what-"

"You're on your way to three questions."

"I really don't see how that matters," Angela said in defense of her boyfriend.

"Right, sorry."

He shrugged off her apology. "We've got bigger problems. Didn't you just hear what the Dean said? She invited what's his face to talk at Mr. Feeny's classes for the rest of the week."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I read her lips when they were talking and I heard everything. If Mr. Full of Himself is here all week and the Dean keeps looking at him like that, Feeny isn't going to stand a chance. Something has to be done, fast."

"Like what?"

"Oh, sure, now it's on me to come up with all the ideas?"

She glanced at the clock. "Isn't it almost time for your first class?"

He jumped up. "Crap, and it's all the way in the arts building. I'm going to be late." He planted a quick kiss on Angela's cheek and ran for the door. On his way out he pulled Mr. Feeny aside. "Work on your game."

"What game?"

"Exactly."

"What?"

"You're dying! It's like when you play Super Mario and you're trying to save the princess but you only have one life left and you get to the castle and you're face to face with evil Bowser but then he brings out the wand and-"

He sighed. "Eric, I beg of you, focus, please."

He stared at his mentor and said, "Win the heart of your princess or you're a dead man: an old, lonely dead man."

/

/

"Iced coffee?"

Angela nearly jumped out of her skin when the large cup of coffee appeared in front of her face and Jack's voice invaded her subconscious. She hadn't heard him approach. "Did I order this? It's been a long day, but normally I remember my coffee needs."

"No, Eric said if you're ever here when I'm working to make one appear. He said something about it being step one in my magician's training. I didn't even know I was in training, so-"

She smiled. "Oh, that's sweet. Thanks."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"You were pretty spaced out."

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine. It's just been a long day. Classes are hectic since professors seem to be getting into review mode to prep us for finals and Eric is hell bent on fixing up Mr. Feeny with Dean Bolander. I want to help, I think they'd be good together, but Mr. Feeny seems afraid to take that final step, you know?"

"And that's the big one."

"Right, that's the step you have to take yourself." She shook her head. "Hopefully it works out. Anyway, how much do I owe you for the coffee?"

"Nothing."

"Jack, come on."

"No, really. Employees get free beverages and discounted food and Eric's been forfeiting his free coffees and putting them aside for you for months."

"Seriously? But we've only been dating for a couple weeks." Come to think of it, coffees have just magically shown up lately whether Eric was working the counter or not. And no one would take her money. Most would just wave around a coupon they said a previous student left behind. She never really thought about it. She was a poor college student. Freebies, especially of the caffeinated kind, were appreciated.

"And might I say I think it's an improvement. Maybe his brain is one that is hurt by the effects of caffeine. Wait a second, did you say dating? Like officially boyfriend and girlfriend dating?"

Crap. "Umm…"

"That's a yes?"

"I'm sorry. Don't be mad at him. We were going to tell everyone soon. We just wanted to have some time to ourselves before Cory and Shawn found out and-"

"-and started stalking you?"

"Sort of."

He nodded in understanding. "Sorry about that."

"I should be the one apologizing to you. Eric's your best friend and Shawn's your brother. I can't help but feel like I'm putting you in an awkward position."

"No, it's okay." Jack looked around and was glad to see it was relatively empty. Most people were still in afternoon classes. "Actually, I think I'm the one who owes you an apology."

"What are you talking about? This is probably the longest conversation we've ever had. How could you have anything to apologize to me for?"

He took a seat on the couch. "See? There's one thing right there. You were dating my brother for almost a year and we never had a single conversation. I should've tried to get to know you and I didn't. I'm sorry about that."

"It's not like I was going around begging for your life story either so I guess that makes us even." She patted his arm in a not completely comfortable manner. "No apology necessary."

"Fine, maybe not for that, but the other thing…"

"What other thing?"

"When you and Shawn were together and he…he…" He shifted around and rubbed the back of his neck. "I mean, you know."

"I do?" She had no clue what he was talking about, but he seemed really nervous. The more nervous he got, the more confused she became. She wracked her brain trying to come up with some slight, even imaginary, he could've committed, but came up empty. "Jack, trust me, whatever you think you did, consider it forgiven. If I can't remember it couldn't have been a big deal."

"But it was a big deal, Angela," he started in a voice louder than he intended. "It was." How difficult was it to say, 'I'm sorry I just stood there like a statue and did nothing when Shawn got drunk and put his hands on you?' Apparently it was very difficult because every time he tried to say the words they wouldn't come out. Still, he wanted to apologize. He felt like he owed her at least that much no matter how much time had passed. "Okay, you see-"

"Actually, can I take a rain check on whatever this apology is for?"

"Huh?" He realized she was focused on whatever was behind him and turned around. Shawn was getting situated at one of the tables in the courtyard. "Oh, sure, if that's what you want."

"I'm not blowing you off, but I sort of planned on telling Shawn about Eric and me today." She knew Eric wanted to be nearby when the conversation happened, but she had a feeling things would go better if he wasn't around.

"Oh, right."

"Yeah. And I know Shawn had his poetry club meeting today and after the meeting he always-"

"-sits outside and works on poems."

Angela nodded. After their breakup she switched poetry clubs. It was too difficult for her to be in the same one with him at the time. She always thought it ironic considering she was the one to introduce him to poetry in the first place. He had her book of sonnets to thank for his interest. Yet she was the one who made the change. "It would kill him to know he's become so predictable, but it works to my advantage today."

He got up and headed for the counter. "I'll be in here if anything…if he takes it bad."

"I think I can manage."

"Oh. Okay."

It did seem strange to her that Jack was trying to be friends now, but the effort seemed sincere so she supposed it was only fair that she tried, too. "But thanks."

/

The paper seemed to taunt him. Normally Shawn had no problems writing after poetry club let out, but this week's three possible prompt choices had him stumped. Normally there was one he could work with, but this time they all seemed designed to bring him maximum amounts of pain. He could write about falling out of love, which he hadn't yet managed to do. He could write a poem about his worst personality trait- no shortage of potential landmines there. Or he could write about something he saw this past week that has stuck with him. The only image that has stuck with him was seeing Angela and Eric behind the counter in the Student Union. He really didn't want to immortalize that with words.

"Shawn?"

He laughed humorlessly when he saw Angela standing there. "And the hits just keep on coming."

"Excuse me?"

"Forget it. What do you want?"

"Can I sit down?"

He almost said no, but realized at least this way he'd get to be with her, just the two of them, for a couple of minutes. That never happened anymore. "Sure." It wasn't lost on him that she chose the chair farthest away.

"I need to talk to you."

"Uh-oh, you're using your serious voice. Something wrong?"

"No, well…I don't think so. I'm not sure how you'll feel about it though."

"Is this about you and Eric," he asked, deciding to spare her any further attempts to jump through verbal hoops.

She frowned. "Why are you asking me that?"

"If you're going to try to sneak around and make out, you probably shouldn't do it behind the counter where any random person could walk by. I don't even want to guess how many potential health code violations you guys were committing."

"How did you-"

"I saw you the other night when me and Cory were coming back from the movies."

"Oh."

"Cory didn't see you."

"I'm sure I would've heard about it by now if he did," she said in an attempt to make a joke. He didn't laugh. "Look, Shawn-"

"You and Eric are dating," he concluded.

"Yes."

"So you were lying to me when you first got back and said not getting back together with me had nothing to do with him?"

"What? No, I wasn't lying. Eric and I weren't together then. And even if we weren't together now I still wouldn't be with you."

"Wow…thanks."

"Don't be like that. You know very well why we didn't work out. Or do you need me to run down the reasons once more?"

Shawn shook his head and briefly put his hands over his ears. "No. The knell conversation of our relationship is still burned into my brain." He didn't need to hear her say she was over him again, didn't need to be reminded that he had no one to blame but himself.

"I'm not trying to hurt you, but-"

"Then you wouldn't be screwing around with someone I used to consider a friend. I didn't think you were that type of girl."

"That's not fair. It's not as if we planned this." Angela was puzzled when he started to laugh. "What's so funny?"

"I'm just trying to imagine what a romantic evening with Eric must be like. Did you get free tokens at Chuck E. Cheese when you told them it was your first date?"

"Stop it."

"Ladies first when entering the ball pit," he guessed. "Oh, then again, that might be too bold a move for a first date. Ball pit sounds more like a third or fourth date kind of an activity."

"Shawn-"

"He at least spotted you a few hundred points with Skee-ball, right? Because that is one thing I can say for Eric, he kicks major butt at Skee-ball. Even I can't beat him."

Angela crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. "I'm serious. Knock it off."

"I can't imagine the conversation is that stimulating, unless, of course, you managed to find subtext in Bugs Bunny cartoons. And I know you, Angela. I know you. You need to have something to connect with him on at intellectual and emotional levels or else this will fizzle out in a week or two. Huh." He sat back and smirked. "I guess Cory was right. This is all about revenge."

"What?"

"You're still mad at me for calling it quits in the first place and for not being able to commit again at Christmas, which, yeah, I was a total jerk. I admit it. What better way to get back at me and make me suffer than to go after a friend?"

She seethed, words failing her.

"It's okay," he continued, "I know it's hard when someone close to you points out a truth that's difficult to face, but it's not really fair to Eric for you to do this to him and make him believe you're falling-"

"You're really so self-centered that you think a decision as serious to me as who is my boyfriend - a subject you know I don't take lightly given my past and trust issues- is just a mind game to get back at you or make you jealous? Who the hell do you think you are?"

"That's not what you're doing?" Before Shawn could process what was happening, he found himself drenched in Angela's coffee. Thank god it was iced. "So no?"

"Go to hell. And when you get there, feel free to get a life and quit worrying about who's in mine."

"Everything all right out here," Jack asked. He watched the entire conversation from inside and could tell from body language it wasn't going well, but when Angela dumped her drink over his brother's head he took that as a sign to intervene. "Angela?"

"I'm sitting here attracting bees and you're asking how she is?"

He chose to ignore Shawn. "You okay?"

She tossed her bag over her shoulder and headed for the door. "The ambience is great. The company, however, leaves something to be desired."

"I'll get you another coffee."

"What about me?" Shawn stood.

Jack threw him a towel. "Here."

"What am I supposed to do with this? Why are you helping her and not me? I'm your brother!"

"Right now she's a paying customer and you're the non-customer who pissed her off enough to make her waste a large beverage." So he bent the truth a little. Shawn didn't need to know her coffee was free. Jack hurried back inside and caught Angela just as she was leaving. "Hey, wait a second! Sorry about…about whatever happened out there."

"That's okay. It actually went a little better that I thought it would," she admitted, continuing to head towards the exit.

"Don't you want more coffee?"

"It's fine."

"No, really, this one is on me."

She turned around to face him. "Why?"

"What?"

"Why are you being so nice to me today? It can't just be because I'm dating Eric. You didn't give a damn when I was with Shawn. Why now? What's so different this time around?"

"I'm just trying to right a wrong…that's all."

"And coffee will make us even?"

"It'll be a start."

"Jack, really, whatever it is-"

"Just shut up and let me give you damn the coffee, okay?" When her eyes narrowed and her gaze fixed on him, he was unsure if that had been the appropriate response. "Please?"

"Fine," Angela relented with a sigh. Caffeine was needed after a double dose of the brothers' Hunter. "If it will make you feel better, I'll take the coffee."

"Thank you." Without even asking if she wanted it, he wrapped a cinnamon Danish in tissue paper and placed it on the counter beside the tall to-go cup. "There, Eric said you like Danishes, too."

"Well, yeah," she started with a smile, "the coffee gets lonely otherwise."

Jack shook his head, realizing that's exactly the kind of thing his best friend would say. "Careful, you're starting to sound alike already."

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

Once Angela was gone and the rush of students coming out of afternoon classes had been served, Jack went to check on Shawn. He was scribbling furiously in his notebook, seemingly oblivious to the rivulets of coffee soaking the pages. "My Own Worst Enemy," he said as he read the title aloud over his brother's shoulder. It only seemed to get worse as it went on. "Yikes. That's a tad on the dark side, don't you think?"

He pulled the notebook closer and covered the page with his hand. "It's supposed to be dark. One of the prompts is to write about our worst personality trait and I have them all and…and I use them to hurt the people I care about most and damage every relationship in my life until there's nothing left and no one to lash out against. Eventually the only person left to hurt will be me."

Jack sighed and sat in an empty chair. He hated when Shawn got like this. It was exhausting and he had no clue how to help. "Don't you think you're exaggerating a little?"

"I've lost Angela for good, and to Eric of all people."

"Yeah, I heard." He tossed the extra towels he brought onto the table.

"You knew?"

"I didn't know for sure until five minutes before she told you. What did you tell her that made her dump coffee on you?"

He shrugged and said, "Whatever I could think of that would make her mad."

"You upset her on purpose? Why?"

"Angela's beautiful when she's angry and fired up," Shawn answered with a ghost of a smile on his face. "She's beautiful and passionate and full of life. I needed to feel that energy again, even if it was just for a minute."

"But she's mad at you now. I don't understand how that's a good thing."

He ripped the page out of his notebook and crumpled it up before tossing it in the garbage. "Me either. Look, I'm going to clean up before I attract every bug on campus."

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm as okay as I get."

"Shawn?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. You need to lighten up. Don't worry so much."

"I'll work on that," Jack muttered to himself as Shawn walked away. At the moment he felt like drowning his own head it a vat of coffee. For all his talk about how neutral and Switzerland he planned to be about this situation he knew that was crap. Eric was his best friend. Shawn was his brother. How the hell did he think he could get out of this without picking a side?

/

/

"She actually used the words, 'I'm dating Eric'?"

"No, but-"

"Then there's still hope, Shawnie! If she didn't say it exactly like that there's hope."

"Cor, the only reason Angela didn't say it exactly like that was because I didn't let her. I said it for her."

He smacked his best friend upside his head. "Why the heck did you go planting stupid ideas like that in her head?"

"The ideas were already there. She confirmed them. Face it. Angela and your brother are…they're…they're dating." Shawn fell backwards onto his bed and covered his face with his hands. "I blew it. It's over."

"What do you want to do?"

"What can I do? It was one thing when she was single and I tried to win her back. But if I chase after her knowing she's with someone? Tell me, Cor, how do you think Angela would take that?"

He took a seat next to his friend. "She'd probably get a lot more coffee to dump on you, and that's if you're lucky. Worst case she'd stop talking to you all together."

"Right."

"So what now?"

"I pray like hell that it's a fling."

"I'm right there with you."

"Are you sure?"

"What do you mean?"

"Eric's your brother. Right now it sounds like you're rooting against him."

"No," Cory scoffed, "I'm not rooting against Eric. I'm rooting for you. Big difference. Sure, if he was any kind of friend to you he never would've gone after Angela in the first place, but no, I'm not technically against anybody." He clapped his hands together. "Now get that pout off your face. We've got cupcakes to sell."

Shawn groaned and sat up. "How did I let you rope me into this?"

"Simple. I said, 'Shawnie do you want free cupcakes?'"

"And why are you doing this?"

"Because Dean Bolander said it would look good to the university board while I'm on probation to have charitable acts on my record."

"What is the bake sale raising money for?"

Cory was silent. He hadn't been paying attention during that part of her speech. He just heard the words bake sale and volunteered, figuring it would be easy. "Something worthy, I'm sure."

Shawn opened the door and was startled to find Eric on the other side, getting ready to knock. "What the hell do you want?"

He frowned. "Hello to you, too. Is Cory here? I need to talk to you both." Eric tried to step around him to enter the room, but he wouldn't move aside. "Shawn, what the hell?"

"I know."

"You know what?" He wrinkled his nose. "Did you wash your hair with coffee or something? It's a little much."

"A mocha shower courtesy of your girlfriend," he snidely replied.

"My girl…oh." He told Angela to wait until he was around to have this conversation. "Look, Shawn-"

"I don't want to hear it. In fact, I don't want to hear anything you have to say ever again. Just get out."

"I can't."

He took a deep breath. "I swear you-"

Cory decided to intervene. "Eric, maybe you should stay away for a few days, at least until tempers die down a bit, okay?"

"Mr. Feeny needs our help."

"What? Why? What's wrong?"

Eric explained what had been going on the past few days with Mr. Feeny, Dean Bolander, and now her ex-husband. "This is Mr. Feeny. He has never turned his back or given up on any one of us, has he?"

"No," Cory and Shawn answered in unison.

"So don't we owe it to him to help him find love and happiness? This might be his last shot."

"What do you expect us to do?"

"I don't know, some of that dumb Cory and Shawn crap you did in high school."

"Are you crazy? I'm on probation. I hit a teacher, remember? I get even one more strike and I'm out."

"Then we don't get caught. Come on, Feeny is family. Who deserves to be happy more than him?"

"You'll stay the hell away from me after this," Shawn asked.

"If that's what you want, yeah, I'll do my best."

"Then fine, I'm doing this for Mr. Feeny and only for Mr. Feeny."

They had a lot of things to discuss, but Eric knew those issues would have to wait until later. "I understand. Cory?"

He sighed. "If Shawn's in, I'm in."


	14. Chapter 14

"…and I clung to the edge of the cliff with my right hand while in my left I held the priceless jeweled crown of the ancient queen. I was losing my grip and-"

"Your grip with reality," Eric muttered to Cory and Shawn who were sitting in the seats in front of him. It was the following day and they were in Mr. Feeny's class.

"-and I had to make a choice. Or, should I say, most men in my position would've made a choice: save themselves or save the crown. But, my friends, I am happy to say that I saved us both and the jeweled crown of the ancient queen is now on display at-"

"At some museum none of us are ever going to visit, you Indiana Jones wannabe!"

"Eric, shush," Cory admonished. "We're here to blend in." Whatever animosity he felt towards his brother was taking a backseat at the moment. Helping Mr. Feeny was the focus. "You're bad at that on a good day."

"Nah, I'm with him," Shawn broke in amidst the cheers and applause. "Indy's gotta go."

"Of course he does but ranting and raving like a lunatic won't accomplish that."

"I hate to admit it but the guy is an impressive story teller."

"I know. It kills me, but-"

"Not you guys, too. We're Team Feeny. Why are you buying into what he's selling? He's the enemy."

"We know that, but…"

George looked out from the podium and noticed Eric, Cory, and Shawn bickering in the back of the room. They snuck in just as class was beginning, but since they kept quiet- mostly- he said nothing. He had a pretty good idea what they were doing here. While he appreciated Eric's intentions, this wasn't a situation that could be forced. When their conversation seemed to pick up volume he approached. The next instructor would be in to teach a class in just a few minutes and didn't need to listen to the rantings of these three stooges. "In case you missed it, I dismissed the class five minutes ago."

"Show's what you know. We're not even in this class, Feeny."

"Yeah, I think he gets that, Eric."

"Care to tell me what's prompted this sudden interest in my class? There are times you three barely pay attention to the classes you are actually enrolled in."

"Oh, is this your class?"

The educator sighed. "I'm really not in the mood for the runaround right now, boys. So if you'll excuse me-"

"Mr. Feeny, wait," Eric said, stepping forward. "You're going to blow it. That smug jerk just waltzes in to steal your girl and you're not even putting up a fight."

"Dr. Kincaid is not stealing anything. Lila is not a prize to be won or stolen. She is a human being."

"Lila?"

"Um…well…," he stammered, "…that is her name and what I've heard others call her."

"Sure, maybe people who have got the hots for her. Like you!"

"You will not reduce my feelings for the woman, if there are feelings, to hots. Unless…did she use that term?"

"Oh, come on, Mr. Feeny, you've got it bad. Everyone can see that."

"Look, Lil-Dean Bolander is a very complex woman and this is a delicate situation. You can't rush these things."

He snorted. "No danger there. You practically need life support to stay in this race, buddy. Every second lost is just another clogged artery."

"My cholesterol was a little high at my last doctor's appointment," he acknowledged.

"There you go. Don't you want someone to be there to pound your heart back into working order when you have one fancy cheese too many? That could be the dean."

"Fancy cheese? On my salary?"

Cory pushed Eric aside. "Mr. Feeny, what my less than tactful, lunkhead of a brother is trying to say is what's wrong with telling the dean how you feel? Hiding your feelings is only going to lead to heartache and misery. I mean, look at Shawn."

"Hey! I'm standing right here."

"Sorry, Shawnie, I love you, but you made a major romance faux pas no matter how many times I told you to tell Angela the truth. Come on, Mr. Feeny, don't be a Shawn."

"Why am I here if you're just going to rag on me?"

"Boys, the dean is like an orchid. And orchids have to be tended to with care. Trust me, I'm a gardener. I know these things."

"Stop using your flowers and fancy words to hide your pain. Focus on what you feel."

"I would, but…well…the only appropriate course of action is to let her resolve things with her ex-husband before pursuing anything."

"If you keep waiting around the next booty that explorer dude is bringing back to his trophy room is hers'. That guy is stealing your booty."

"She's not my booty," he exclaimed. "And even if she was, I would prefer not to talk about it with the three of you. You are students, I'm a teacher, and Dean Bolander is in a position of authority. It's wholly inappropriate that we are even having this conversation."

"We're just trying to help you the same way you've always helped us," Eric said. "You don't give up on us. We don't give up on you."

"I appreciate the loyalty, I do, but again, this is a very difficult situation."

"Come on, Feeny, don't you remember what you said to me when I was confused about things with Angela?"

"Apparently I am invisible today," Shawn whispered to Cory.

"You said I would be dumb to let go of someone who brings out the best in me and inspires me to want to be a better person. You said finding that kind of connection is rare."

"I did."

"You also said that we had to be the ones to decide if being together was worth the risk of pissing others off and pushing them away. And most things worth having don't come easily."

"Yes, but that was a different situation. You and Angela were on the same page. You talked about your feelings and knew the other felt the same."

"Does it say kick me on my forehead," Shawn asked, louder this time. He wasn't sure how he felt knowing Mr. Feeny encouraged Eric and Angela's relationship.

"Come on, Feeny," he continued, ignoring Shawn, "does the dean make you happy? Does she make you want to be a better person? Is she worth the risk?"

It was so much easier to give advice than to be the one getting it. "She…I mean, I…I have a meeting to get to." He rushed to the desk and stuffed papers into his briefcase. "Thank you for the conversation and I appreciate your concern, but-"

"You're running away?"

"I have a meeting. Very big…important stuff to be looked at and…and gone over and..."

They thought he was going to keep talking, but he turned tail and left instead. "I'm going to keep working on him," Eric said. "You guys go do your thing."

"Our thing? What's our thing?"

"I don't know, whatever it is that you do! You said you would help. I thought you guys came up with something. I told you where Kincaid is stashing the artifacts. Maybe you'll get inspiration there."

"Solid plan you put together," Shawn fired back sarcastically.

"Just…whatever, Hunter. Remember, don't tell Angela or Topanga. We don't want them getting in trouble. They need that plastic liability."

Cory scrunched up his face in confusion. "What are you-" Suddenly it hit him. "That's plausible deniability, you moron."

Eric stared down his brother before coming forward so they were eye to eye. "This whole fighting thing is cute and all, but how about we finish helping Mr. Feeny before you two go back to being pissed, okay?"

He wasn't sure if that was a challenge, but decided not to risk it. He was pretty sure Eric could still kick his butt in a physical fight. It was mental sparring where Cory had the advantage. "Fine."

/

/

"Do you have any idea how lucky you guys are," Angela lectured as they all sat in the student union later that evening.

"Yeah," Topanga chimed in. "You could've gotten suspended, or Cory, what about you? You risked expulsion."

"It was for Mr. Feeny so it was worth it." It was almost too easy how it all came together after a rather shaky start. He and Shawn were searching around Dr. Kincaid's artifacts when a couple things broke. It ended up working to their advantage. Pin things on Feeny as a crime of passion to show the dean his true feelings. What they hadn't planned on was the killer bee escaping, nearly stinging her, the doctor only caring about the bee, and Mr. Feeny having to make the save and take the sting anyway. "And two weeks cleaning windows isn't that bad."

"I just wish we didn't have to wear those jumpsuits," Eric lamented. "They make us look like prisoners….or the Kool-Aid Man."

"If that's the worst that happened to you just shut the hell up and accept it. Some artifacts did get damaged after all," Angela pointed out as she took a seat on the arm of the chair he was sitting in.

"At least we helped Feeny. After all the times he's helped us we finally got to repay him a little."

Shawn couldn't help but watch as Eric's arms went around Angela's waist and how she leaned into him in response. He could tell they weren't doing it in an attempt to show off or rub their new relationship in his face. The movements…the closeness…it came naturally. That almost made it worse. They were just acting like a couple. It would be easier to deal with if they were trying to rub his nose in it. If they were doing it on purpose he could call them jerks and storm off. And he'd be completely justified in doing so. Instead Shawn could see he was the farthest thing from their minds.

"So I was thinking how about pizza? My treat," Eric added when he was met with silence and stares. "You know, celebrate Feeny and the dean…pepperoni style?"

"I'm in," Angela replied.

No one else was answering, so he kept talking. "Okay…how about bowling? I'll get us a few large orders of nachos and-"

"You've got to be kidding me," Shawn scoffed before getting up and leaving the common area.

He wasn't sure whether to acknowledge what happened or just keep talking. After a few moments he decided it was easier to keep conversation moving. "Okay, I guess it's the four of us. Don't worry, Cor, I remember: jalapeños on the side, not mixed in with the cheese."

"Are you serious?"

"What, you like jalapeños in the cheese now?"

"Pizza? Bowling? Nachos? What the hell are you trying to do?"

"What do you mean? Since when is it bad to offer to buy dinner…or bowling if that's what people-"

"Oh, shut up with the bowling," he exclaimed as he jumped up. "No one wants to go bowling with you."

"Cory-"

"No, Topanga, I'm sorry, but if they can't see what's wrong with flaunting their relationship in Shawn's face…come on, Eric. Even you can't be that stupid." Angela was on her feet and in his face before he had a chance to process what was happening. For every step he took backwards, she stepped forward. He didn't stop until he was backed against the doors. "Did someone miss the day they covered personal space in kindergarten?"

"I want that to be the last time I hear you call Eric stupid," she warned in a low voice.

"Please, you know I didn't mean it like-"

"I don't care how you meant it. I don't want to hear it." She wanted to tell him that Eric cared, probably too much, about what people said and thought of him. Behind that carefree, jokester façade was a deeply insecure person who took to heart every insinuation that he was stupid, whether they meant it or not. She wanted to say those things. But she didn't. It wasn't her place. Besides, there was no telling what Cory would do with the information. Nine times out of ten she'd trust that he wouldn't try to undermine Eric, but he wasn't thinking rationally right now. He tended not to where Shawn was concerned. "Do you understand me?"

He laughed nervously and moved to the side. "Yeah."

"Good." She walked back to Eric and again sat on the arm of the chair.

"I'm going to go check on Shawn." He stopped long enough to stare at his fiancée. "Topanga?"

"I'll catch up."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I'll catch up."

"Fine." He sighed and stalked off.

"I suppose it's going to be a while before Cory's ready for that double date," Topanga joked after an awkward silence.

"He's not the only one."

"The pizza offer is still good if you want to join us," Eric said.

She weighed her options. If she went to dinner Cory would freak. If she didn't, she'd disappoint Angela. Someone was going to be upset. But who was going to be more understanding? "Can I get a rain check?"

He was unfazed, expecting that to be her answer. "Sure."

"But we should set something up in the next week or two. I'll twist Cory's arm."

"Sounds like fun…the arm twisting anyway."

Topanga looked to her roommate, finding the glare she expected. She didn't know why Angela was upset. She wasn't enthused when Topanga suggested a double date last week and still didn't appear too keen on it now. "Do you want me to leave the door unlocked or-"

"No, don't wait up. I'll be late."

"Okay. Have fun."

"Don't you think you were a little rude," Eric asked once Topanga was gone.

"Cory didn't deserve polite. I held back on him." She crossed her arms. "He deserved worse."

"I'm not talking about Cory." He couldn't hear what she said to his brother, but had a pretty good guess. "I mean with Topanga. You could've been nicer."

"Maybe, but she's constantly saying that she misses hanging out with me and feels like I'm pushing her away and you invite her to dinner and she bails?"

"And if she came with us she would've had to deal with Cory when she got back. I love Cory in that 'he's my brother so I have to,' way and he's generally a good guy, but he can be a neurotic nutcase…especially when things don't work out the way he thinks they should."

"Believe me, I know."

"So can you really blame Topanga for wanting to avoid dealing with the crazy?"

"Considering I've been doing all I can to avoid Cory's crazy lately, I guess not."

"Us being together is going to take time for them to get used to. I think we just have to give it that time."

"And if they don't come around?"

"We can bungee jump off that bridge when we get to it."

"Don't you mean cross that bridge?"

He shrugged. "My way is more fun."

"If you say so."

"You know, Jack and Rachel are out tonight." He nudged Angela's arm with his shoulder and smiled.

She ran a hand through his hair and pushed back against him. "Really?"

"Yep, supposed to be gone all evening."

Aside from the night they decided to be a couple, they hadn't had a chance to have the apartment to themselves. Angela hadn't been back to the apartment since then actually. They've either gone out or she's helped him close up the student union. Alone time was rare. "So we could get a pizza, go back to your place, and…"

"…rent a movie, and watch it…or not. Whatever."

"Why did you go through all the drama of inviting those three to dinner? We could've been half way to the apartment by now."

"I was trying to be nice."

"Next time don't, especially when we have a shot at privacy."

"Lesson learned. You know, the longer we sit here and argue the less time we'll have to not watch a movie."

"Right." She jumped up. "Race you to your car? Winner picks the movie?"

"Now you're talking."

/

Cory was exited his dorm and was about to knock on Topanga's door when he saw his fiancée coming down the hall. "Oh, thank goodness you came to your senses! For a minute I was getting nervous that you were actually going to go to dinner with them."

"And that would be a bad thing?"

"Uh…yeah!"

"Can you explain that to me?" She unlocked the door and went inside. "Why would joining Angela and Eric for dinner be bad?"

"Because it's Angela and Eric. It's not supposed to be them. They don't belong together."

"But they are together, Cory. Like it or not they are a couple and seem pretty serious about each other. It's still a little weird to me, too, but-"

"See, even you know it's wrong."

"I didn't say that. I said it's weird, but I'm trying to accept it. Why can't you even try?"

He took a seat at Angela's desk. An open envelope of recently developed pictures caught his eye. He could see most of the one on top and was itching to see the rest. She wasn't in the picture. It was Eric and her father sitting inside a really old looking car. His brother was hamming it up for the camera and Sgt. Moore tried to look serious, but Cory could tell the man was amused and fighting back a smile. They were an odd couple if there ever was one.

"Cory?"

He jumped. "Huh?"

Topanga went to the desk and picked up the envelope of pictures and put it safely in Angela's drawer. "Now answer my question: why can't you try to get used to Angela and Eric being together?"

"I'm not going to betray Shawn like that. He's my best friend."

"And Angela is mine. Why doesn't that seem to mean anything to you?"

Cory sighed and sank into the chair. "Shawn doesn't have anyone. He needs me. I just want to be a good friend to him."

"Why does being a good friend to Shawn mean you have to become a bad friend to Angela and an even worse brother to Eric?"

"I'm not-"

"Maybe it's not your intention, but that's what is happening. You were a real jerk out there. Eric was trying to extend an olive branch and you broke it in half and threw it in his face."

"I'm sorry. I'll try harder."

"Yes, you will."

"Great, we're in agreement. Now are you done being mad at me and Shawn?"

"I'm not mad at Shawn," she said, "at least not about what just happened. It's not easy to see the person you love with someone else. I know that. He is going to need time to get over it."

"But you're mad at me?"

"At the moment, yes, I am. I don't know when, but we willbe going on a double date with them at some point."

"But-"

"No, Cory, no buts. This is not negotiable. Angela is my best friend and we are supporting her in her new relationship. We'd be doing so even if your brother wasn't involved."

It was evident that he didn't have a leg to stand on in this argument. He was not going to win. "Fine." Leave it to Eric and Angela to send the group into chaos. "I was going to get some dinner. Do you want your usual from the Chinese place?"

"No."

"Then what do you want?"

"I'll grab something from the cafeteria. My parents are paying for the meal plan after all." She received a lecture from her mother the other day about responsible spending when she called to ask for more money. "I should use it more."

"Topanga, come on."

"No, I don't want to eat with you and Shawn. I feel like being alone tonight."

He reached for her hands. "Are we okay?"

"You're not going to try to make me pick sides against our friends, are you?"

"No," he responded, realizing as soon as it came out of his mouth it didn't sound very convincing. "I'm not."

She cupped his cheek in her hand and kissed him. "Good. It won't bode well for you if you did."

Cory was afraid to ask what that meant. "I'll get some extra spring rolls in case you change your mind."

Topanga shook her head. "I really do want to be alone."

He kissed her back. "Okay."

"However, I won't complain if the spring rolls find their way across the hall and to my desk."

"You got it." He walked over to the door. "I love you."

"I know. I love you, too."

"Even when I'm acting like a jerk?"

"Yes, even then."

"And I promise I'll try to be nicer to Eric and Angela next time. Okay?"

"I hope so." After the door was closed and Cory was gone Topanga lifted a framed photo from a shelf. It was taken after graduation but before everyone went their separate ways for the summer- well, before she went to Pittsburgh and Angela left to see her dad on his base in Kentucky. Or was it Tennessee? Anyway, Jack had insisted on throwing Shawn a little graduation party. It didn't matter how much the latter protested and threatened not to show up, the bash took place. Mr. Turner was the surprise guest and Shawn even donned a silly party hat, albeit under duress. Before everyone left for the night the group of friends- Eric and Jack included- crammed onto the fire escape and Mrs. Matthews snapped one last picture.

Now, nearly a year later, their group was splintering and Topanga was left wondering how it happened so quickly. The waves and fractures were subtle at first, starting when Shawn decided to break up with Angela and she let him think it was mutual. Months of back and forth, lies, misunderstandings, and hurt feelings finally lead to Angela saying enough and pulling the plug for good after Christmas. Objectively Topanga couldn't blame her. Shawn didn't always treat her very well and if it was anyone but him she would've been leading the charge to keep him away. But, as was often her fiancé's defense, it was Shawn. She couldn't just erase Shawn from her life. Even if it was possible, she didn't want to. He was still a good friend and she loved him. He just didn't always make the best decisions and at times seemed hell bent on destroying any happiness that came his way. So she and Cory made constant attempts to include him and help him realize what it was he really wanted.

In their endless efforts to help and reassure Shawn, neither of them noticed that Angela was pulling away unless it directly affected a wedding plan or a matchmaking scheme. Then they noticed. At the same time they failed to notice that Eric was spending less time with the group as a whole because of the growing relationship between Jack and Rachel. It certainly never occurred to anybody that they were spending time together, that mutual feelings of bitterness and alienation towards their friends would foster a romance. And now that they were together she could see only more dissention among the group for the foreseeable future.

Topanga looked back at the photo in her hands. She remembered how she felt that night- like she was ready to take on the world with Cory and her friends by her side. She would give anything to be that innocent and carefree again. She thought nothing would ever tear them apart. Was it too late to get that back?

/

/

"What made you choose this movie anyway?"

"Honestly? I sort of picked randomly. I saw Tom Hanks' name on the box and figured anything with him had to be at least half way decent." Eric had been in such a rush to get to the apartment so they could enjoy their alone time. But now that they were here it was a little weird. He kept thinking about the times he and Jack would come home in the middle of a date between her and Shawn. "Why? You don't like it?" They were cuddled close, she was practically in his lap and her head was on his shoulder, so he couldn't read her expression.

"No, it's not that. It's a good movie, but I'm going to have these songs stuck in my head for days. Oh, here comes the music again. How many state fairs do they hit?" Angela softly sang along with the title track to That Thing You Do! and he did background vocals. She smiled when he went all out for the drum solo, head-banging included. "You would kick butt at karaoke."

"Karaoke? Like singing in front of people?"

"Yeah, you've never been to a karaoke bar?"

"Nope."

"We should go one of these days. It's a lot of fun. You can sing by yourself or we could do a duet."

"I don't know…just the thought of getting up and singing in front of strangers-"

"This coming from the guy who convinced me to dance in the middle of Lincoln Center because our audience was strangers we would never see again?" Just thinking about that day brought a smile to her face. Their first date had started off a little rocky, but it was a beautiful memory. She leaned over and kissed him, disappointed when he pulled away after a few short pecks. He'd been doing that all evening. It certainly wasn't the behavior of someone who invited her over to not watch a movie.

"Those people couldn't boo us off of a stage."

Despite getting to really know each other for all these months Angela was still surprised when Eric would turn shy on her. Even she could forget that his outgoing behavior was sometimes a front. "You can just watch," she reassured, seeing he wasn't sold on the idea. "That's worth it, too. Trust me. Some people really go all out with costumes and everything. There was this one guy- you'd swear he thought he actually was Elvis."

"I didn't know you were big into karaoke."

"I've only gone a few times. But it's always been fun."

He thought about it for a few seconds before nodding. "Okay, I'll go with you sometime, even if I do just sit and watch."

"Thank you." Angela closed the minute gap between then and slid into his lap before wrapping her arms around his neck.

His hands automatically went to rest on her waist. "If I go to karaoke with you, will you go camping with me? Well, not camping, but hiking? Like a day trip up to the mountains?"

"Sure."

"You mean it?" Eric was surprised. She was a self-professed non-outdoorsy person.

"You're checking out something new for me. It's only fair if I return the favor. Getting out of our comfort zones is good, remember?"

"You mean you would've said yes if I had asked you to go camping?"

She laughed before responding. "No. Sorry, but my sleeping quarters must have indoor plumbing and need to be free from the risk of being attacked by a mountain lion."

"Please, the odds of running into a mountain lion in Pennsylvania are slim. You'd have a much better shot at being mauled by a black bear."

"What?!"

"Eh, I've only encountered them in person three times. And one of those was at the store with my dad when I was dumb enough to hire a show bear. The other times the bear was all the way on the other side of the lake." She looked more freaked out the longer he talked. "But don't worry. Black bears almost never attack humans. You're more likely to be struck by lightning first."

"Is this supposed to be making me feel safer?"

"I promise I'd protect you."

"And how would you propose to do that against a bear? Because, I'm sorry, but in a fight I'd be putting all my money on Yogi."

He thought for a moment before an idea came to him and he grinned. "Allow me to demonstrate." He gently pushed her back until she was lying on the couch and covered her body with his. "See? I'm a human shield."

She smiled up at him and shook her head. "And this will protect me from the bears?"

"Totally, and huddling together like this will help prevent hypothermia, too. It may be springtime, but it can still get pretty cold up in the mountains."

"In that case," she began, as she wrapped her arms around him pulled him down until their foreheads were pressed together, "we'd better practice generating body heat. You know…just to be safe."

"See," he said in a husky voice between kisses, "you're getting the hang of camping already."

She had been so caught up in the sensations stirred up by Eric's lips on her own, then her neck, and back again, and his hands seemingly every place else on her body that when he sat up and pulled away without warning it was a shock. "What, why are you stopping," Angela asked, trying to catch her breath. "Do you hear Jack and Rachel?"

"No."

"Then what?"

"I...I thought you wanted to watch the movie," he feebly replied.

"That's not what you're thinking about."

He sat back on his knees. "Angela-"

"Come on, you've been stopping all night. Is it because we've agreed we're not quite ready for sex yet so you're putting the breaks on before things go too far?"

"No. Although, now that you mention it-"

"What is it then? I think I deserve an explanation."

He sighed and ran a hand over his face. "It's stupid."

"If it's something that is legitimately bothering you then no, it's not. Just tell me."

"Does it feel weird for you to be here?"

"What do you mean?"

"Almost every other time you've been in this apartment you were dating Shawn. Hell, there were times Jack and I would come home and interrupt a date."

Realization dawned on her. "So you thought..."

"I don't know: same apartment, same living room, same couch..."

"To be honest I did have a few moments of déjà vu when I first walked in."

"Oh," he said, his gaze falling to the floor.

Angela squeezed his hands and made him look into her eyes. "Hey, yes, I briefly flashed back to when I was with Shawn, but you're the only one on my mind now."

"Really?"

"Yes. Look at it this way: I'm sure I'm not the first girl you've made out with on this couch. You've had other dates here, right?"

"Uhh..."

"I'll take that as a yes."

"Maybe."

"Are you thinking about any of them right now?"

"No."

"The same goes for me. We've both been with other people and have had relationships before. It just so happens that this apartment shares a lot of that history." She held his face in her hands and kissed him deeply, hoping to give him the reassurance he needed. "We are the only people in this apartment. I promise. No ghosts of relationships' past here tonight."

"I'm sorry." Eric ran his hands through his hair. He hated feeling like this, like he wasn't good enough for her. "I guess being around Cory and Shawn for the past couple of days trying to help Feeny got to me."

"What did they say?"

"Forget it."

"Eric-"

"Really, it's not important."

"Don't listen to them, okay? Their opinions on us don't matter. They don't get a say in this. Only we do." She lay back on the couch. "I like you and want to be with you."

Eric framed her face with his hands and captured her mouth in a kiss. He was content to keep it slow at first, to let the moment build. They had the next few hours to themselves. No need to rush anything.

Angela played with the buttons on his long sleeved shirt, hesitating only momentarily before working them through the holes to reveal his white tee beneath. The chuckles that escaped him a few seconds later when her fingertips danced along his sides caught her by surprise. She looked up at him. "You're ticklish?"

"A little." The glint in her eye matched her smirk. And neither one were innocent. "Please don't use this information for evil."

She grabbed onto his shirt and pulled him back down to her, wrapping her legs around his waist so they were as close as possible. "I make no promises."

/

"That was fun," Rachel stated, as she and Jack exited the elevator.

"Yeah, it was. Thanks for talking me into going. Sorry again about trying to wear the lifts. I would've looked stupid trying to dance in those things."

She gave him a quick kiss. "I told you they weren't needed. No one stared at us like we were a freak show."

"She's too tall for you," an elderly neighbor exclaimed, passing them in the hall.

"Ignore her."

Jack shook his head. "Forgotten already." He dug his keys out of his pocket, unlocked the door, and opened it. He took half a step inside before backing out and closing it again.

"What," she asked. "What's wrong?"

"Eric and Angela are in there," he whispered.

"So?"

"They're on the couch."

Rachel shrugged, perplexed. "Okay?"

"They're going at it on the couch!"

She gasped. "What?"

"They're making out."

"Are they dressed?"

"What kind of question is that? Of course they're dressed."

"Then why are we out here talking about them?"

"Because it's going to be really awkward to go in there."

"Maybe a little, but we can't stand in the hall all night, so let's go."

"But-"

"Jack, no. We've been dancing all night. My feet hurt and the only bra that works with this dress is the one with the underwire that is out for revenge. So, sorry, but we're going in." Rachel pushed Jack aside and led the way into their apartment. He wasn't kidding; Angela and Eric we going at it. She cleared her throat, startling the both of them. "Hi, guys," she greeted with a grin. "Have fun?"

"Hi…um…we were just…um…" He glanced at Angela, saw she was straightening her clothes, and tried to fix his own. "You're home early, aren't you?"

"It's 11:00."

"Oh. Well, you see-"

"You're enjoying the perks of dating, although I'd be happy to forget this happened."

"Sounds good to me."

"Well I'm going to go to bed," Rachel said, "I have an early class."

"Me, too. Goodnight."

"Hang on a second, guys," Eric called out.

"Yeah?"

"What are these? I found them on the couch when we came back here tonight."

Jack winced at the sight of his lift shoes. "We went dancing tonight and I was feeling a little self-conscious about my height so I was going to wear those. But I just looked stupid."

He nodded. "I could see that."

"Be nice," Angela admonished. "I think you made the right call, Jack. You look much better just as you are."

"Thanks, Angela." There were a few beats of awkward silence. "Goodnight, guys."

"Goodnight." When they were alone again she slid back over to Eric and wrapped her arms around him. "We should go dancing again."

He hugged her close. "I like dancing: holding you close, moving to the music…what's not to like?"

"I heard about this new club that opened that is eighteen and up until midnight."

"I'm twenty-one. It doesn't matter for me."

She gave him an incredulous stare. "Maybe, but I'm still only eighteen, remember? I won't be nineteen until the end of June."

"Oh, right. I guess I am robbing the cradle, huh?"

"Just a little bit."

He rolled his eyes. "Gee, thanks."

/

/

Topanga strode slowly down the hall to her history class. She didn't sleep very well last night. Angela didn't get back to the dorm until after midnight and she was dressed and leaving as Topanga was waking up this morning. She was getting to class even earlier than normal today, hoping for a chance to talk to her best friend for just a few minutes. Those hopes were dashed when she saw Angela already conversing with another classmate, Breanne. She had a few classes with the girl and was a name Topanga heard mentioned with some regularity. She hadn't been spotted yet, but could hear their conversation.

"…definitely. It sounds like a plan. Let me talk to Todd and find out what night works for him."

"Let me know. I talked Eric into going to karaoke. Maybe just the idea of sitting in the audience won't make him nervous if there's another couple there."

Topanga backed out of the classroom, suddenly not feeling very well. Angela was making plans with other friends and other couples? Was it already too late? Had she already lost her friend?


	15. Chapter 15

"Ugh, I think my brain is going to explode," Angela muttered before laying her head to rest on her text book.

Eric looked at her from his spot in a bean bag chair on the floor. "You're the dumb-dumb who decided to take both chemistry and physics her freshman year. Why would you make a bonehead choice like that? You want to be a writer, not a scientist."

"I did it to help your brother."

"What does Cory have to do with your class schedule?"

"When we first picked our classes he was Mr. Over-Confident and chose the hardest ones he could find in the catalogue- honors this and advanced that. Then reality hit and he came crashing back to earth in epic Cory fashion and Topanga, Shawn, and I rearranged our schedules and gave up a class so he could have one."

"I don't understand."

"I have scholarships that require me to carry a full course load. So I had to scramble to find another class to fill the void. I wanted to get an extra English class or creative writing, but those were gone. I had no choice but to take an extra science."

"Next time let Cory deal with his own idiot decisions instead of making things harder on yourself."

"I was trying to be a good friend."

"And look at you now: beating your head against a book. Take it from someone who knows, the book always wins." He looked at the time before tossing his own text book aside. "We're long overdue for a break anyway."

"No, just a little more reading. I want to make sure I have the laws of thermodynamics straight."

"You've been studying nonstop for almost three hours. Why are you obsessing so much? It's not like the test next week is the final."

She sat up and spun the chair around so she was facing him. "Maybe not, but the professor said whoever has a 90% in the class going into the final can opt out and if I do well on this test it will bring my 88 up so I wouldn't have to worry about a stupid chemistry final."

"So the test on Monday could be your final if you play your thermodynamics right."

"Exactly, at least assuming I don't bomb any assignments or lab work in the next couple weeks. Unfortunately I don't think my brain can hold any more information." She tapped her head with the pencil eraser. "I've reached maximum capacity. If I try to learn anymore I may spontaneously combust."

"Do you think you'd get extra credit points for spontaneous combustion? That would be cool."

She glared at him. "No offense, but if you're not going to help, shut up."

"Relax. Lucky for you I have a cure for your stress. It's very top secret information, but I'm willing to share."

"That is lucky for me. What is it?"

"I call it The Eric Matthews Foolproof Study System."

"Foolproof?"

"Foolproof. Many people have passed tests listening to me. Lesson number one is…" Eric tried, and failed, to get up. He tried two more times before rolling to the side and landing on his hands and knees on the floor. "Okay, new lesson number one is no one looks cool getting out of a bean bag chair, not even me."

She didn't bother to hide her laughter. "I don't know, you pull out those moves on the dance floor tomorrow night and you'll attract all sorts of attention."

"Do you want my help or not?"

"Yes, please." Angela was skeptical when he took her hand and led her over to his bed. "What exactly is this plan?" Instead of answering, he sat beside her and pressed his ear against her head. That was different. "Um…"

"Shhh, shhh. "

"But what are you-"

"I'm listening to your poor brain scream its little heart out from chemistry overload." He stroked her hair. "I hear you, brain. It's okay. Don't worry, we can fix it."

"Eric, what the hell are you talking about?"

"Give me your left shoe."

She pulled away from him. "What?"

"Give me your left shoe."

"How is that going to help my overloaded brain?"

"Do you want to hear the magic behind The Eric Matthews Foolproof Study System or not?"

"Yes…I think." She took off her shoe and placed it in his hand. "Now what?" Moments later she watched him throw her shoe on the floor before taking off his own left shoe and tossing it next to hers'. "Okay, Vanna, I need to buy a vowel because I can't solve this puzzle."

"This works better with a larger group, but the idea is you grab a shoe that doesn't belong to you, find the owner, then take them to a movie. And by the way, you ask Pat to buy the vowel. Vanna just flips the letters and looks pretty in her dresses."

"And none of this explains how going to a movie will help me study."

"It doesn't. But it helps you relax. And relaxing helps your brain remember all the studying you already did."

"I don't know."

"You already said you can't study anymore or else you will break your brain. And I'm guessing a broken brain would suck for your scholarships, too, right?"

"Yes, but I just don't feel like going to a movie right now. It's getting late."

"It's only eight-thirty, grandma."

"I'm not up for a movie. Sorry." She laid her head against his shoulder. "Do you need any help with your homework?"

"No, I think I'm good. My brain is done for the night, too. I took one of the practice tests and checked my answers in the back of the book. I only missed three questions. If it was a real test I would have an 82%. That's three points better than the quiz I took Tuesday."

She leaned up and kissed his cheek. "See, you keep working hard and it's paying off."

"You give me some excellent motivation."

"Please, I don't do anything."

"Yes, you do. You do a lot. You help me break down all the big numbers and words in a way that actually makes sense to me. You make me flash cards so I can study even when I'm working. And hey, who is the one who discovered that I had a desk in here?"

"Isn't it amazing what you can find when you actually clear away the laundry, magazines, and dishes instead of piling them to the ceiling?"

"Totally. You…I like how happy you get when I get a good grade. I work harder because I don't want to let you down."

"The only person you need to worry about is you. These are your grades. They're not mine, your parents, or even Mr. Feeny's. Ultimately our feelings don't matter. I just want you to try your best. You have to want it and do it for you."

"I know, but sometimes it doesn't seem like enough to just do it for me. I need the extra inspiration when I start to panic and the words jumble together. And knowing if I pass I get to show off the grade to you is that inspiration sometimes." Eric lay back on the bed and covered his face. "Okay, I didn't realize how lame and cheesy that was until I said it out loud."

"I think it's sweet."

"Please."

"No, really." She lay beside him and propped her head in her hand. "Don't get me wrong, it's approaching Cory levels of sap-"

"Ouch."

"-but I may have to face the fact that the sappiness just might be a genetic trait in you guys."

"What do you expect from people whose parents address bad love notes to Pooh Bear and Boom-Boom but terrible sap?"

"Pooh Bear and Boom-Boom?"

"Apparently those are mom and dad's secret pet names for each other."

"I'm not sure I needed to know that."

"We're not thrilled about it either. Let's just agree right now- no cutesy, schmoopy nicknames."

"You'll get no argument from me," Angela agreed, resting her head on his chest.

"Great, because the minute one of us says Pookie-"

"Oh, if I ever call you Pookie feel free to run. I will not blame you. Just make sure you drop me off at the hospital before you go so I can be checked for brain damage."

"Ditto." They laid together in amiable silence for several minutes. Eric noted how weird it wasn't hanging out with her in his room, in his bed. It wasn't that he'd had a lot of girls in his room before, though there had been a few. But he had always felt a certain amount of pressure with them. Maybe that was a benefit of being friends first. They were comfortable with each other and weren't rushing things. "If you don't want to go out we could always watch a movie in here."

"Huh? Sorry, I think I dozed off for a minute or two," she admitted, snuggling closer to him. "Did you say something?"

"Uh-oh, bad sign if I'm boring you already."

"Not boring…you're comfortable. Safe. Secure." She tilted her head up and kissed the side of his neck. "Trust me, not boring."

"Sounds like a lie, but I'll take it. Do you want me to drive you back to campus?"

"No, not yet. What were you saying before?"

"I asked if you wanted to watch a movie here. We could make popcorn and raid Rachel's candy stash."

"We're not taking her candy."

"It's clearance stuff she bought after Easter. She has bags of it."

"No."

"I'll swipe you some peanut butter cups."

"Well…."

"That's the spirit!"

"Oh," Angela exclaimed, sitting up, "I know what we can do."

He followed her lead and sat up as well. "What?"

"You've been promising me a performance of your one man show: Eric Matthews: Look at Me, Look at Me! Do it tonight."

"You really want to see that?"

"Yes."

"It was panned by critics that included Mr. Feeny and my parents. Hell, my parents fell asleep...my parents. You know, those people who are supposed to love, honor, and lie to me shamelessly and tell me I'm brilliant 'til death do they part?"

"What do they know," she scoffed. "Please?"

"You're sure?"

"Yes."

"Will you tell me I'm brilliant after even if it's a lie?

"We haven't lied to each other yet. Not that I think I will have to lie. I'm sure I won't, but would you really want me to start now?"

"In that case will you at least be nice?"

"That I can do."

"Okay, just let me get set up. We'll do this is the living room. There's more space for me to act out the windmill of emotional turmoil I felt when Cory was born."

"Windmill of emotional turmoil…but weren't you like three?"

"You have met my brother, right? Imagine how needy and whiny he was as an actual crybaby."

"Fair enough. I'm making popcorn. Something tells me this show calls for popcorn."

"Don't throw it at me."

She rolled her eyes. "I wouldn't waste popcorn like that. Oh, one thing. Can I take off my other shoe or is the one shoe thing part of the whole experience?"

"No, that's over. But you're more relaxed now, right?"

"I am no longer stressed," Angela stated as she added her right shoe to their discarded footwear.

He wrapped his arm around her and led her out of the room. "That's another success story for the Eric Matthews Foolproof Study System in the books. And to think you thought I was nuts when I told you to take off your shoe."

"I did, but you were right. It made all the difference."

/

Angela was adding butter to the popcorn when Jack and Rachel came in. "Hey, guys. How was the library?"

Rachel groaned and tossed her backpack on the chair. "I wish I thought like you and Eric and didn't schedule Friday classes. I don't want to take my Linear Algebra test tomorrow."

"What are you whining about? You have it easy. I have to give a presentation in economics."

Angela almost smiled when she saw Jack lugging a large poster board into the apartment. It brought back memories of grade school and science fairs. "I thought you loved money and economics."

"Yes, when it's logical and makes sense. But this semester the professor is focusing on game theory and creative applications in business. It's too abstract for me. I'm not the creative ideas guy. I'm the numbers guy. I like the bottom line."

"Wouldn't you need to learn to be creative to stay one step ahead of other businesses?"

"Sure, take the teacher's side," he grumbled. Just then he noticed the large bowl of popcorn. "You and Eric watching a movie?"

"Not exactly. He's been promising me a performance of his one man show and tonight is the night." She frowned when she saw the look on his face. "What?"

"Good luck."

"What does that mean?"

"I've never heard this play, but I have seen the script. It rivals the phone book in size. And considering Eric wrote it-"

"Before you say anything else- don't. You might not be creative, but Eric is. I think it's very brave of him to be willing to open himself up like this and bare his soul. Is it going to be perfect? Probably not, but I'm still going to be supportive. If you can't do the same…no one is forcing you to stay and watch."

Before he could even be annoyed about practically being ordered out of the room in his own apartment he felt Rachel come up behind him.

"Of course we can be supportive, right, Jack?"

Two against one. There was no winning here. "Sure thing."

"Besides, even if it's not perfect it's Eric," she reassured her boyfriend. "At least it's guaranteed to be entertaining." They all looked around when the lights flickered off and on. "What the-"

"Show starts in two minutes," Eric announced.

Almost exactly two minutes later they were sitting in the dark living room. Suddenly, a lantern switched on and the sounds of a baby crying filled the room.

"June 24th, 1978," Eric began as he slowly emerged from a black turtleneck, "I…am…born! Sadat and Begin win the Nobel Prize. John Paul I I is declared the new pope."

"Um, Eric," Jack interrupted.

"Shh, it's not the audience participation part yet, Jackie."

"But your birthday is February 9th."

"I took a little creative license when I wrote it. I was feeling more like a Cancer than an Aquarius that day."

"But-but it's your birthday. How do you take creative license with a factual event like your birthday?"

Angela picked up a handful on popcorn and threw it at him. "You're done talking." She gave Eric an encouraging smile. "What happens after the new pope?"

He stood up and moved the stool aside before striking a pose. "A new dance craze sweeps the nation…"

/

"At least they made it longer than my parents before they fell asleep," Eric said, gesturing to Jack and Rachel on the couch.

"They were working at the library all night. They were tired."

"I saw you yawn a few times."

"We studied all evening," she argued half-heartedly.

"It's okay. You can tell me it sucked."

Angela shook her head. "No, it didn't. Don't get me wrong, it needs a lot of editing and condensing, but I think it was a very solid first effort. Not many people would be willing to lay themselves bare like that- embarrassing moments and all. I think the main issue is that your life is still in Act One yet you tried to drag that out into a whole play…a really, really long play- five acts. I mean, do you need a ten minute song and dance routine for the first time you met Mr. Feeny?"

It was humorous how she was doing verbal somersaults to spare his feelings. "It was a life changing event." He sighed and went to grab a drink from the fridge. "The problem is that it's boring. My life was boring. I was at a crossroads and I still feel that way now even though I'm in college and sort of have direction. I'm still trying to make sense of things."

She followed him to the kitchen. "I think college is supposed to be about crossroads. This is when you try and determine your path."

"Does that mean in twenty or thirty years when I find my way and do things worth writing about you'll watch the play?"

"I'll be there opening night, front row center."

Eric took her hands. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"You're one thing in my life that makes sense. Sometimes it's still weird to me because I didn't see this coming-"

"-that makes two of us."

"-but it's still true." He wanted to say more, about how she made him want to be not just a better student, but a better person in general. But it felt too big, too heavy an admission to make right now. "And…and I'm very happy about that. It's nice having something that makes sense for once."

"I feel the same."

"Good. It would suck to be on different pages." Eric was babbling and he knew it. "I should probably drive you back to campus now," he said as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

Angela's arms immediately went around his neck. "Probably. No matter how quiet I try to be I always seem to wake Topanga and I know she has a class in the morning." She stood on her toes and kissed him. "I had a lot of fun tonight, after the studying anyway. Thanks for saving my brain from spontaneous combustion."

"No problem. If you're going to be combusting it definitely shouldn't be over homework. Wait a minute," he started when she began to giggle. "That came out dirtier than how I meant it. I didn't mean it like that."

"Eric, it's okay. I'm not offended. Anyway, you're right. There are much more fun ways to…combust…than over chemistry homework." Her hand went below the collar of his shirt and ran across his back. She'd be lying if she said she didn't get a thrill when goosebumps appeared on this skin almost immediately at her touch. There was something empowering about knowing someone wanted you, especially when the feeling was mutual. "Although when we do experiment with other ways to combust something tells me there will be some form of chemistry involved."

"Is that so?"

"Yep: chemistry, biology, physics…all the best parts of science."

"And earlier tonight you thought science was evil," he pointed out.

She closed the distance between them. "Clearly I was mistaken."

"Just kiss already!"

"Jack!" Rachel hit his arm. "Ignore him," she said to Eric and Angela when she saw them take a few steps away from each other.

"What? It's really late and I have to go to bed." He fell asleep during Eric's little skit, but woke up to him and Angela talking in the kitchen. He had been waiting for them to be distracted enough so he could sneak out of the room, but they kept talking. "Sorry, didn't know you guys were into weird science flirty talk. What is that, man, the Albert Einstein school of foreplay?"

Angela shook her head and laughed. "I'm going to get my books from your room."

"All right." Eric waited until she was out of sight before he whipped a roll of paper towels at his roommate.

"Ow! Watch it!"

"You didn't have to be a jerk."

"I wasn't trying to be a jerk. I was being what I am- a guy who can barely keep his eyes open trying to get to bed."

"Next time shut up and go to bed."

"Next time shut up and kiss her."

/

/

"Good morning, Mr. Matthews."

Cory looked up from his late breakfast and saw Mr. Feeny standing across the table. "Oh, morning. Sorry I was late for class today. And I promise I'll have that homework to you by the end of the weekend, Monday at the latest. Actually, you know what, I have a paper due Tuesday so could we make it Wednesday?"

"And what about the homework I assigned today that is due Wednesday?"

He sighed and looked at the stack of books beside his plate. "I guess I am a little behind."

"May I join you?"

"Sure."

The educator pulled up a chair and sat down. "Is there something on your mind?"

"No, it's not something. It's a lot of things."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Topanga's freaking out about her parents coming to town at the end of next month to do wedding planning. She's convinced something is wrong and nothing I say makes her feel better. I try to get her to talk about other things besides her parents, but she doesn't want to pick a date, a hall, or even her dress until they get here."

"I can see how that can make it hard to focus on what should be a happy occasion."

"You can say that again."

"Anything else?"

"I'm trying to keep Shawn from crumbling to pieces with this whole mess with Angela and Eric." He slammed his mug onto the table.

"Ah, so I'm guessing you're preoccupied about eighty-five to ninety percent of the time on Shawn's problems, the other ten to fifteen on Topanga, and maybe you're leaving about half a percent for you…for your school work?"

His eyes were wide. "Don't tell Topanga it's that uneven."

"I trust she already knows."

"Yeah, you're probably right. I don't know what to do, Mr. Feeny."

"I do have a suggestion, though you may not like it."

"What is it?"

"Focus on yourself and what will directly affect your future at the moment. That means from now on until the end of the term school needs to be where your attention lies. College is not like high school. You can't play catch up and hand everything in right before the final exam and expect to pass. You're not a child anymore.

"Whenever you have a stern grasp on your education, talk to Topanga about the wedding. Listen to her concerns and acknowledge them. I suspect that is all she wants."

"What about Shawn?"

"Cory, just as you need to focus on yourself, Shawn needs to learn how to handle things himself. And, perhaps more importantly, you need to learn to let him."

"I'm just supposed to abandon my best friend after he's been stabbed in the back by my brother and the only girl he ever loved?! Are you out of your mind?"

"You're acting as though they got together specifically to spite him."

"How do we know they didn't," Cory challenged. "Eric's too dumb to think up something like that, but it's cunning enough for Angela. Shawn hurt her bad. What better way for her to screw him over than rebound with someone he thought was his friend?"

"Hmm."

"What?"

He held up his hands. "All I said was hmm."

"That was a pretty loaded hmm."

"Think about what you just said. You admitted that Shawn hurt Angela badly."

"So?"

"You consider Angela a friend, yes?"

"Of course."

"Do you typically wish for friends to return to relationships where they were treated poorly?"

"Well, no, but…come on, Mr. Feeny, this is Shawn we're talking about here."

"Yes, and it is also Angela and your brother. I admit this is a complex situation and a very gray area, but perhaps it's time you stopped thinking of them as enemies out to get Shawn. As far as I can tell that is not what happened. They were friends for a long while and developed stronger feelings for one another. It's not right and it's not wrong. It just is."

"But Shawn-"

"Eric came to speak to me before he and Angela became official, for lack of a better term. He was concerned about whether or not it was right to pursue it. Part of that was because he was worried about Shawn, because they had been friends and roommates."

Cory mindlessly added more sugar packets to his coffee. "It just doesn't match the picture in my head. It's supposed to be me and Topanga and Shawn and Angela- two couples in love surviving college together. When we graduate we're supposed to by homes next door to each other, have kids together, raise them together- you'll teach them by the way, take vacations, retire, and then when we turn one hundred we'll count to three and die at the same time so we're never apart."

"That's…remarkably codependent."

"Oh, and I was going to get it in writing for the four of us to be cremated and all stuffed into one big jar. The kids can trade off custody of course."

Mr. Feeny's eyes widened. "Of course. That would be the only sensible thing."

He sank down in his chair. "I sound like a lunatic, don't I?"

"To put it mildly, yes."

"I like when things are predictable and make sense. Shawn and Angela make sense. Angela and my brother…they don't."

"You don't get to be the judge of that. Only Angela and Eric can make that call."

"What do I do?"

"It is possible to be a friend to Shawn, a friend to Angela, and a brother to Eric all at the same time."

"I don't think so."

"Have you tried?"

"Not really."

"Try."

"But if I turn my back on Shawn he'll have no one."

"No one is asking you to turn your back on him. Just as I hope no one is asking you to turn your back on Eric or Angela."

"Good. As I said, there is no enemy here. Perhaps it's time you stop acting like there is." He checked the time. "If you'll excuse me, I need to get to my next class."

"Right. Thanks, Mr. Feeny."

"You're quite welcome. And remember-"

"I know. You're always here to talk."

"No…well, yes, but do your homework. I want that late assignment by the end of the weekend."

/

/

"Oh, good, Topanga, you're here," Angela said when she opened the door to their dorm and saw her friend parked at her desk. "What are you doing?"

"Plotting the demise of my philosophy professor, that's all."

"What's wrong?"

"He handed out topics for our finals today."

"This far in advance? Ooh, it's gotta be bad, huh?"

"I have to write fifteen pages on whether or not there will ever be World Peace."

"Couldn't you just type no in really big font?"

"You don't think it's possible?"

"Have you seen this world," she scoffed. "Please."

"I'd like to think it's possible. My parents always told me it was."

"Yeah, but your parents are hippies, girl. I'm an army brat whose dad was always being shipped off to a war zone. Trust me, World Peace? Not happening. It's a nice dream though."

Topanga frowned. She knew Angela had a more cynical view of the world, but she hadn't realized how much they differed. "Why were you glad to see me when you came in?"

"I'm going shopping and wanted to know if you wanted to come. I'm going out with Eric tonight to that new club- you know, the one that's eighteen and up until midnight, one on weekends?"

"Yeah, I heard it's supposed to be a lot of fun."

It went against her better judgement, but Angela heard herself saying, "You and Cory could join us if you want."

"I'm not sure. I have to check with him. When I saw him a little while ago he told me Mr. Feeny read him the riot act for a late assignment he wants in his hands by the end of the weekend.

"Oh…okay. Well, I wanted to get something new to wear for tonight if you're interested in coming along."

She momentarily eyed the work on her desk. Normally she was the type to get started brainstorming right away, but what harm would it be having a little fun before getting to work. Besides, she and Angela haven had a ton of time to hang out just them lately. "Sure, sounds great."

"Good. Let me just call Breanne and tell her we will meet her outside in a few minutes."

"Breanne is coming?"

"Yeah, she's driving. You don't mind, do you?"

She shook her head and plastered a smile on her face. "No, not at all. It will be nice to get to know her."

/

Despite her initial annoyance and trepidation, Topanga did find herself starting to like Breanne. She was smart and had a good sense of humor. She also came from a military family and spent much of her childhood moving around, so she and Angela bonded over that. It was readily apparent, however, that Breanne knew far more details about Angela's relationship with Eric than she did. That stung. It made her feel like an outsider.

"Man, stupid big mouth Jack! What would've happened if he didn't interrupt?"

"Probably nothing," Angela admitted as she held up a shimmery gold blouse and looked in the mirror. "Nothing beyond what Eric and I have already done anyway."

"So you're stalled out at second base?"

"We're not stalled out. And trust me, there is a whole lot of fun to be had on second if you know what you're doing."

"And does Eric?"

"Let's just say I'm not complaining and leave it at that." They laughed. After a minute or two Angela realized Topanga was standing a good distance away, absently looking through some shirts. "Topanga, you okay?"

"Great, just checking out the sales' table. You never know when you'll find a good deal." She walked over with a plum colored halter in her hands. "What do you think about this?"

"That's pretty," Breanne began, "but I don't know. I still like the gold one."

Angela held them up side by side. "Purple- it would work best with my dark jeans, the ones with the subtle glitter you can only see from certain angles. Let me try it on to make sure it fits." She quickly disappeared behind a curtain.

"So, are you and your fiancé going to the club tonight?"

Topanga jumped. She had been having a petty vindication party in her head that her fashion choice was selected over Breanne's. "What's that?"

"Are you going out with Angela and Eric tonight?"

"I'm not sure. Cory's behind on some assignments. It will depend how behind I suppose."

"That sucks. My boyfriend and I were supposed to double with them again, but Todd got called into work because another waiter got sick and tonight is my little sister's birthday and she insists I be there for dinner even though I'm going to her party Sunday."

She and Cory were last minute, second choice invites? "That's too bad. It's not like the club is going anywhere though."

"That's true. You're engaged to Eric's brother, right? He's the really overdramatic guy with the curly hair?"

"Yes."

"You guys should definitely come with us the next time we go to karaoke. It was so much fun."

"Y-yeah, we'll have to work something out with our schedules."

"It fits perfectly," Angela declared as she stepped out of the dressing area. "Let's pay and get back to school. I still have no idea what I'm doing with my hair and makeup." She looked around and saw that Topanga was already heading towards the register. "Is she okay?"

Breanne shrugged. "I don't think I said anything wrong."

/

/

Later that night Topanga was in bed thumbing through a bridal magazine. She was hoping to get ideas for centerpieces, but in reality she was reading the same paragraph over and over. It was one thing to know you were drifting apart from your best friend but it was something else entirely to see them bonding with someone else. A knock at the door removed her from her lonely musings. She got out of bed and was surprised to see Cory on the other side all dressed up. "Cory? Did we have a date tonight that I forgot about?"

"Not exactly."

"Then what is all this?" She eyed him cautiously and reached out and touched his hair. "Did you gel your curls?"

"Mousse."

"Why?"

"I like the way it smells."

"Why are you dressed up and smelling good?"

"Because I've been a jerk and I figured you probably really wanted to go out with Eric and Angela tonight but assumed I'd say no so didn't even bother to ask me. So…" He twirled around. "Surprise. All dressed and ready to go."

"Cory, I don't know if they want us there. Angela asked but I think it was a pity invite. I don't know if they meant it."

"Then it's because of me, not you. I haven't been willing to give them a chance."

"But you're willing now?"

"I'm willing to try."

"Why?"

"I can see that you're upset and you miss Angela and I don't like to see you upset."

"I'm not sure."

"Will you at least give me a chance to prove I can see them and not freak out?"

She took a deep breath and nodded. Cory was willing to try. This was big. "What about Shawn?"

"He's working at the photography studio, busy all weekend." He hated that Shawn was working for that photographer again, the same guy he wanted to work with instead of going to college. Ever since he started there again he had been taking his classes less seriously. But at the same time Cory was glad his friend had something to occupy his mind. "I'll tell him later."

"Okay. Let me make myself pretty and presentable."

He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. "You could go like this and be the most beautiful woman there."

"That's very sweet, honey, but I have zit cream on my face. So I know there's a good chance you're lying."

"Never."

/

"I thought it would be packed," Angela said as she observed the crowd. There was a good number of people, but there was still some room to dance and walk without being sandwiched between strangers. It was the exact opposite of any other club she's been to, especially on a Friday night.

"It probably will be once all the under 21s are gone."

"Oh, so it's my fault," she teased.

"Completely." Eric held her hand and led her to a quiet corner of the dance floor. "Have I mentioned yet how beautiful you look?" Ever since she pointed out that he called any woman he found attractive "hot", he tried not to use that word for her- even when it was the only way to describe her. For her it was a term he used interchangeably that held no meaning. He never wanted Angela to think she was interchangeable to him.

"You have, but I won't stop you from saying it again." The chill that went up her spine was involuntary as his fingers traced patterns along her bare back as they swayed to the music.

He stared into her eyes. Her heels had put them on a more even level and the lights from the club almost gave her the effect of a halo. "You look gorgeous."

"Thank you. You look good, too," she whispered in his ear. "I love the green. It really brings out your eyes." She wrapped her arms around him and held him close- there was no space between them. Her head was on his chest and she found herself moving more to the beat of his heart than to the music. For the moment it was as if they were the only two people in the club.

After a few dances they decided to take a break and get something to drink. They were nearing the bar when someone called out.

"Oh, my, Angela! I thought that was you! See, I told you it was her."

"No, I told you it was her. Of this I am sure."

Eric was confused as the two bickering men approached and held Angela closer. "Do you know those guys?"

"I'm not…oh, my, god. No way! Sergio? Nunzio? What are you doing here?"

"This is our club, silly," they answered in unison.

"Really?"

"Yes, our grandfather died and left us money, so-"

"-so we decided to forego college and focus on what we love most- money and dancing."

"Wow, it looks great."

"Yes, well so do you." Sergio looked at Eric. "This was not your boyfriend before, no?"

"Oh, no, Shawn and I broke up last fall. This is Eric. We've been together for a little while now."

"Well you certainly traded up- in looks and dancing ability."

She pointed at Nunzio. "Be nice. We didn't work out romantically but Shawn is still a friend."

"You're right. Where are my manners?" He slapped his own hand. "Bad, Nunzio!"

"So sorry to chat and run but we must mingle with other customers, make them feel like friends so they come back."

"Of course."

"Nice meeting you, Eric."

"Yeah."

"Save us a dance, Angela."

"Sure."

"And don't worry, you can stay beyond one if you like. Of this I am sure…because I am the owner."

"We are the owners. And whatever you order from the bar, on us."

"Thanks." She could feel Eric's eyes on her as Sergio and Nunzio walked away. "I know, they're a little eccentric, but they're very nice."

"How do you know them?"

"Topanga and I worked with them last year at that Mexican restaurant. We all used to go out dancing after work sometimes."

"Oh."

"You're not jealous, are you?"

"No, they're just…I'm not sure. They have strong personalities. But I guess it works to run a club."

"They're Sergio and Nunzio. I don't think they'll ever change." The song playing morphed from a fast, upbeat one to something slow you could sway to. "You want to dance again?"

"I'd love to. Something tells me once they get you out there I won't see you for the rest of the night."

She chuckled and leaned forward for a kiss. "They've got nothing on you…of this I am sure."

/

"Wow, this is nice," Topanga exclaimed.

"Yeah, it is, a little crowded though."

"I know, but it's a nightclub. What did you expect?"

He craned his head and looked out over the sea of people. "Do you see them?"

"Not yet." She held onto Cory's arm for leverage as she stood on her toes in her heels. "Oh, there they are."

He followed where Topanga was pointing and saw his brother and Angela wrapped in each other's arms and swaying to the music. Every once in a while one of them would say something- whisper in the other's ear to make them laugh or smile. In one instance he'd even swear he saw Eric blush after one of Angela's comments. He couldn't deny that they looked happy though, happier than he had seen either one of them in a long time. If only seeing them together didn't feel so wrong. It still felt like a betrayal to Shawn.

"Cory?"

"Huh? Sorry, what did you say? I didn't hear you over the music."

"Shouldn't we go say hi?"

"I don't know. I just realized maybe the surprise factor of my plan wasn't such a good idea. I'm sure they'll be happy to see you, but me? I might require advanced warning. They seem to be enjoying themselves right now. I could ruin that."

She looked away. "Oh. So, did you want to leave?"

"No, no there's no need to waste this look. How about we have a dance or two and then go to that all night diner on Melrose and share a banana split?"

"I'd love to. It's been so long since we've done that."

"Yeah, sorry. I guess I've a little preoccupied with stuff lately."

"That's okay. So have I."

Cory held out his hand. "So, we dance?"

"We dance."

/

/

"No way! Sergio and Nunzio run the club," Topanga exclaimed. She had decided to try and get past her little funk over Angela and Breanne from yesterday. Maybe if Cory's offer to try to accept Angela and Eric's relationship was legitimate, her friend would be more forthcoming about details of her life again.

"Yes. They still love to dance and they asked all sorts of questions about you. They insist I bring you with next time."

"Definitely I will be there, right, Cory?"

He made a face. "Sergio and Nunzio?" He never did like those guys. They were always a little too chummy with Topanga and Angela.

"Cory…."

"Whatever you want, dear."

Shawn entered the Student Union and froze up when he saw Eric behind the counter and Angela on the couch talking to Cory and Topanga. He was tempted to turn around and leave, but Jack called and asked to meet him here.

"Hey, Shawnie," Cory called out. "Join us for coffee."

"Um, no thanks. I'm meeting Jack outside." He was about to head for the doors when his brother came in with Rachel through another entrance.

"Goody, you're all here," the redhead cheered. "I have something very exciting to announce."

"What is it?"

"Next weekend Jack and I are hosting out first dinner party and you are all invited."

"A dinner party?"

"Yes, it's going to be great. We'll get dressed up and eat good food. It's very sophisticated and fun. I promise. Anyway, here are the invitations." She went around the room and handed them out.

"Rach, I know where you live," Eric remarked with a smirk.

"It's a grown up dinner party and for grown up dinner parties you have invitations!"

He patted her head. "Okay, settle down Big Red. Should I RSVP with the fridge magnets or leave a message on the bathroom mirror?"

"The magnets will be fine."

"Cool."

Jack took Shawn aside and gave him an envelope. "I know it's lame, but Rachel really wants to do this and she wants you there, too."

"You do realize you're asking me to spend the night with…with them."

"I know it's not going to be easy, but-"

"Oh, it's going to be really easy because I'm not going."

"You can't even try? Look, Shawn, I don't ask you for any favors, but I'm asking for this. Do I think this dinner party is lame? Yes. But it's important to Rachel. And Rachel is important to me. I'd like to think after all this time I've become a little important to you."

"I'll think about it."

"Fine."

"If I show up it will be for the free food."

"Great."

"I might even eat on the fire escape."

"I'm sure you'll have great weather for it."

"I sure as hell am not talking to anybody."

"You say that like people will be surprised."

"Can I go to work now?"

Jack stepped aside. "Be my guest."

"Is he coming," Rachel asked, walking over as soon as Shawn was gone.

"I have no idea."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *I say Eric took "creative license" with his birth date because the show gave him two. In season 3 his birthday was celebrated in the episode Stormy Weather, which originally aired February 9th. In the season 4 episode An Affair to Forget he says June 24th. I always go with the February date because it came first.
> 
> *And I don't know why Sergio and Nunzio, lol. They just popped into my head while writing.


	16. Chapter 16

"Eric! What did you do?"

He looked away from the display he was setting up and saw his dad coming towards him. He did not look happy. "I'm just arranging the summer stuff the way you wanted. What's wrong?"

"We just got our deliveries in."

"Today is delivery day, so that's good."

"No, not good. Do you want to tell me how the hell we ended up with twenty-four cases of these utensil sets," Alan demanded, holding a package of camping cutlery in his hand.

"You told me to order them."

"Not this many I didn't."

"Yes, you said to order twenty-four units. That's what I did."

"A unit is the individual product and for this product there were twelve units in a case. Meaning you should've ordered two cases. It is listed plain as day when you place the orders. Do you know how far over budget this mistake sets me?"

"I'm sorry. I guess I got mixed up."

"We've gone over this. Do I have to stand over you and hold your hand to make sure you don't screw up the deliveries?"

"I already said I'm sorry. What do you want me to do?"

"You are going to get on the phone and you're going to stay on that phone until the distributor agrees to take the extra cases back."

"Fine, I'll do it after my lunch break."

"No, you get lunch when you fix this. Go call the distributor."

"But Angela's coming over and we're going to get something to eat between her classes. It's the only free time we had to see each other today. And I haven't really seen her in a few days because-"

"Oh, well. I need this taken care of." Alan spotted a couple of customers standing near the lanterns. They looked a little lost. "We're not done talking about this."

After his dad walked away Eric saw Angela standing on the other side of the counter. She was early. "So my day's going great," he stated sarcastically, shoving his hands into his pockets. "How about you?"

She smiled sympathetically and walked over to him. "You okay?"

"Please, it's not like it's the first time dad's yelled at me for screwing up."

"In front of customers?"

"Been there," he answered with a wave of his hand. "He flipped his lid when I brought a live bear into the store. I told you about the time I got the genius idea to hire a show bear to attract customers, right?" She nodded. "He got right in my face, too, and let me tell you- bears have really bad breath."

Angela knew this was bothering him more than he let on, his rambling was proof. She saw the look on his face while his dad was ranting. "In front of your girlfriend?"

"He didn't know you were there. Besides, how else were you going to be broken from the spell that I am utter perfection?"

"Oh, so this was an elaborate piece of performance art to remove my rose-colored glasses?"

"If I say yes will you believe me?"

She squeezed his hand. "I'm going to go around the corner and get us some sandwiches."

"That's okay. You don't have to do that." He shook his head. "What kind of idiot mixes up the units and cases?"

"You're human. You made a mistake."

"An expensive one," he added before muttering, "can't believe I did that."

"You'll fix it."

"I'm glad you think so. But let's take a rain check on lunch. I don't want you to listen to me grovel to the distributor over the phone."

"Do you want some good news?"

"Definitely."

She reached into her bag and took out some papers that were stapled together. "Check it out. The Eric Matthews' Full Proof Study System has another success story."

He smiled and skimmed her test. "Hey, you got a 98!"

"That's right. This brings my average up to a 93 which means-"

"No chemistry final!"

"Assuming I don't blow up anything during the labs that is."

"Just don't ever bring me to your labs and you'll be safe."

He was joking, but she still didn't like it. She took a few steps closer and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Have I ever told you how much it pisses me off when people put down my boyfriend? I get angry and protective and-"

"-and you beat them up? Because seeing that would be hot."

"Let's just say I'm tempted and leave it at that."

"Sounds scary."

"Oh it is…for the other person."

"I think I get what you're saying."

"Good. I'm still bringing you a sandwich."

Her tone left no room for argument so he didn't even bother. Eric quickly looked around and saw that his dad was still occupied with customers. He decided to take advantage of these few moments of freedom and leaned down to capture Angela's mouth in a kiss. When she tried to pull back he brought his hands up to cup her cheeks and deepened it instead. Her arms were still around his waist and he was caught off guard when her hands wandered, ultimately settling in his back pockets. She'd never done that before. He liked it.

The bells above the front door jingled and Angela remembered where they were. She reluctantly broke the kiss. "Your dad," she whispered against his lips.

"I'm already in trouble. How much worse could it get?"

"Eric! Did "call the distributor" sound like "make out with your girlfriend"? Get on the phone!"

He sighed and kissed her one last time before pulling away. "Sorry."

"That's okay." She quickly ran a thumb across his lips to eliminate all traces of her lip gloss. "I'll be back with your lunch." Once Eric disappeared into the back Angela found herself alone with Alan. It amused her to no end that he seemed just as uncomfortable as she felt. "Well…bye."

"Sorry about your date, but Eric will never learn if he doesn't fix his screw ups."

"Maybe things would be different if you stopped expecting him to fail."

"Excuse me?"

"Try having some faith in him." Eric had mentioned to her recently that it seemed like his parents were just waiting for his next crisis to occur. He didn't blame them based on his past behavior, but admitted it was exhausting to have people watching and waiting for a mess to clean up. "It's just something to think about." She shook her head. She didn't come here to get into a disagreement with Mr. Matthews. "Goodbye."

/

/

"Do you even go to school here anymore or are you just taking up half a dorm?"

Shawn barely acknowledged his friend when stormed into their room. Instead he remained focus on the book in his hands.

"Hello?" Cory whipped a pillow across the room. He was only mildly satisfied when it hit Shawn in the face. "Are you listening to me?"

"It's kind of hard to tune you out."

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

He sighed and put his book aside. "What's up?"

"You missed classes again."

"I know."

"You know?"

"Yes, Cor, I know."

"Where were you?"

"I woke up this morning and asked myself a question. Did I want to go sit in a classroom for hours listening to teachers drone on and on about shit I don't care about or did I want to go take pictures of hot girls and make money?"

"The photography studio again? Come on!"

"No, you come on. Everyone always says go to college to get a job that gets you money, but if you can skip the classes and go straight to the money what kind of idiot would say no?"

"You'd be the same idiot who is my best friend and promised to go to school with me."

"I said I'd give it a shot. The shot's been taken." He took a slip of paper out of his pocket and held it up. "I like the side that gives me money."

Cory's eyes grew wide when he saw the amount on the check. It was definitely more than he got helping out his dad on the weekends. "Yeah, that's great and everything, but-"

"Let's face it, I figured out the loophole. I beat the system. I'm making money now. For once in my life I am ahead of the curve. Who needs college?"

"What are you saying? You're dropping out before we even finish freshman year?"

"I haven't officially decided yet, but-"

"No! Nope! No, sir. It's not going to happen. Not on my watch."

"It's not your decision."

"Is this all because of Angela and Eric?"

"It's everything, Cory. This year has sucked big time. I lost the only person I've ever really loved, my dad died, I found out that I'm basically a charity case to Jack's rich stepdad, and-"

"That's not a reason to drop out of school and throw your life away."

"Throw it away? I have a job- a job I'm actually good at- that gives me money and allows me to hang around hot women...sometimes they're in next to nothing."

"It doesn't matter how many hot women there are or what they're wearing or not wearing. You're still not going to have the woman you really want."

"This isn't up for debate. It's my choice."

"Debate, good idea. Maybe we can discuss it as a group at Rachel's dinner party Saturday night."

"I'm not going to the stupid dinner party."

"Why not?"

"Hmm, let's see…three happy couples and me? That's not my idea of a good time."

"So bring a date. Who knows, maybe Angela needs the jolt of seeing you with someone else to realize how much she misses you." He could already imagine Topanga's reaction to what he just said. She'd been on him to be more welcoming and supportive of his brother and Angela and he was trying, but this was Shawn's future at stake. This was sudden death overtime. Anything goes.

He had to admit it wasn't a terrible idea. "Who would I bring?"

"You were just bragging about hot models. Bring one."

"I don't know if Jack and Rachel's dinner party is a model's dream hangout."

"Then show up to a class or two and meet a girl and bring her."

"Is this just an elaborate set up to get me back into the classroom?"

"If it works out that way I won't complain. Will you just promise me something?"

Shawn sighed, feeling a guilt trip coming. "What?"

"At least finish the year. We're so close to the end of our freshman year. Go to the rest of your classes and take your finals. It would be a waste if you stopped now."

He hated to admit it, but Cory had a point. He'd still be stuck owing Jack's stepdad money for this year anyway- the man said he was happy to help and wasn't expecting to be paid back, but Shawn refused to be indebted to Jack's family. "If I do this and I decide not to come back next fall you won't have a meltdown?"

"I'm not making any promises, but at least you'll have one full year under your belt."

"Whatever," he mumbled.

It was as good as a concession in Cory's eyes. He opened his backpack and handed over a sheet of paper. "Here: I wrote down all the assignments you missed."

Shawn put the paper aside and moved towards the door. "Later."

"Where are you going now?"

"I've got to find a date for Saturday, right?"

Cory lie back on his bed and put a pillow over his face. He just wanted one day without drama. Was that too much to ask?

/

/

"So today was fun," Angela said as Eric led her into the Student Union. There were more people milling around than she expected on a Friday night. Shouldn't they be partying? After their missed lunch the other day they'd both been looking forward to Friday- their day. They went to the science museum, had lunch, he indulged her with a trip to a new bookstore she's wanted to check out, and she returned the favor by going to the arcade and watched him play his favorite game. They still weren't ready for the day to end so they had dinner followed by a movie and some ice cream. "By far the best eleven hour date I've ever been on."

"Me, too. I usually get tired of a person after like…hour four, but not with you."

"That's always good for the girlfriend to hear." She linked her arm through his and debated momentarily before speaking again. "You want to come back to my room?"

It was the first time she's asked him that. "What about Topanga?"

"She's out with Cory. They went to a stage adaptation of some book they're reading for English." Topanga said something about it being extra credit, but admittedly Angela hadn't been paying much attention. She checked out of the conversation once she realized she'd actually get to have some privacy with Eric for a change. They needed some alone time. "They won't be back for a while."

"Sure."

She nodded. "Good."

Eric didn't know why he was nervous. He was going to Angela's dorm. He's been in dorms before...in girls' dorms. Hell, he's been in her dorm before. Granted, that was only for a few minutes here and there- mainly if she needed help carrying something. And she's been in his room multiple times and they were together in her room at her dad's. But this was the first time she'd actually invited him inside to stay awhile. Something about having an invitation made it feel different. Usually they had to worry about Topanga and Cory, not to mention Shawn across the hall. Angela fumbled with her keys and he wondered if she was a little nervous, too. He held no expectations for what the night would bring, but it was still a step forward in their relationship.

"Here we go," Angela said, pushing the door open. "Sorry. The lock sticks sometimes. We put in a request to get it fixed, but you know how long that stuff can take."

"It's better than having a lock that doesn't work at all." He looked around. Nothing had changed much from the last time he saw it, although Topanga's side of the room was notably messier. "What happened over here? Pangers get robbed?"

She smiled. "Contrary to the vibe she puts out, Topanga is not always the neatest person in the world. If she knew you were seeing this she'd freak."

"Cool."

"You want something to drink?"

"Sure."

"Water or soda?"

"Soda's fine."

She retrieved the drinks from the mini-fridge and placed them on the nightstand. "What are you doing over there," she asked, confused to see Eric sitting in her desk chair.

"Sitting."

Angela gestured to her bed. "Plenty of room here." She reached for his hands and pulled him to his feet.

"Sorry, didn't want to assume or-" His words were cut off when she kissed him. Eric didn't know if it was the thrill of finally being in her room or if it was because this was the first time they'd been alone all week, but her kiss felt different. It was more intense. And much like she did the other day, her hands snaked around his waist before finally drifting lower. Only this time she didn't merely rest her hands. She squeezed, she pinched, she pulled him right up against her. He liked it. He liked it a lot. "So this is new," he said when he had to pull away for air.

"What is?"

He mimicked her actions and rested his hands on her behind. "Not that we haven't gotten a little grabby sometimes but..."

She covered his hands with her own, encouraging him to hold her tighter. He was a quick study. "Do you want to stop?"

"No!" Crap, he probably sounds too eager. Hell, he was eager. There was no way Angela didn't know how she was affecting him right now. "No. I like new- especially with you. New is good."

"There's nothing wrong with experimenting with new ways to have a little fun, right?" She smiled before kissing him again.

"I'm always up for some fun. Er-wait a second. Let me rephrase that."

"It's okay," she interrupted with a chuckle. "I know what you mean. And it probably seems weird to you that I'm ready to...advance our fun but not for all the way sex. It's a bit of a mystery to me, too, but it's like I said: I've been burned before by rushing all in too quickly." She played with the buttons on his shirt and tried to find a way to verbalize what she was feeling without hurting him. "It's not that I don't trust you, I do, but-"

"I'm not going to say it's easy. There have definitely been more cold showers ever since we got together, but you're worth it. I want that next level and I want to be closer to you. I may use up all the cold water in Philadelphia, but I don't want to rush and mess things up between us. We can take all the time you need."

"Thank you."

"No problem."

"And just so you know, I don't think it will be much longer."

_Stay calm. Breathe...just breathe._ "Oh?"

"I mean, we do need to discuss it first, but you're not the only one who wants to be closer. It's not easy to kiss you goodbye at the end of the night." She grabbed onto his shirt and pulled him flush against her. "But lucky for us we don't have to say goodnight yet."

"Yeah," he whispered, awestruck when she undid the buttons on his shirt and slid it off of his shoulders. Angela had never been timid with him, but this boldness and open desire to be with him was hot as hell. "Lucky us." Eric moved back half a step and the back of his knee hit her bed. He looked at her, waiting to see how she wanted to proceed. Seconds later he was on his back and Angela was climbing on top of him to straddle his lap. This was usually when his alarm clock interfered and the dream ended. He ran his hands up the outside of her thighs. She definitely felt real. If this was a dream it was his best one yet.

"Are you okay? Do I need to move or-"

“You're perfect.” He tightened his hold on her thighs and held her in place. "I'm...this is good."

She tried in vain not to squirm as his fingers found their way up under her top and danced along the skin of her waist. He found a sensitive spot along her ribcage and she shifted back slightly in his lap, involuntarily pressing against him. She gasped at the sudden contact. "Is this revenge for me discovering you're ticklish the last-" Before she could finish her thought Eric sat up and hugged her close, crushing her against his chest. The fervor of his kiss took her right back to their first. He'd been surprisingly take charge and dared her to match him in intensity. She was happy to oblige then and even more eager now. Their mouths dueled for dominance and she grinned when he relented and lay back against her pillows.

He was either being rewarded or tortured. At the moment Eric couldn't decide which. Angela was in his arms, her lips were on his, and they were all alone. He remembered to breathe- barely- when she removed her sweater and tossed it to the side in one fluid motion. The red lacy fabric they lay beneath it left little to his imagination. She trailed kisses down his neck and across his collarbone and chest, catching him off guard with an occasional nip of her teeth. He wanted to do something…kiss her…touch her…anything to reciprocate some of the pleasure she was giving him, but she would return his arms to his sides, content to focus on him at the moment. She was somewhere near his navel when it occurred to him that they might be going too fast. Of course then she glanced up at him with a coy grin that made his stomach do flip flops. He was completely at her mercy. If this was torture it was the absolute best kind. When he felt her hand graze his belt he realized he needed to regain control of the situation.

"Ang-Angela." His instincts were waging war within him; his body telling him to shut up and encourage her to continue her path. It had been too long since he’d been in this position. His conscience, however, were saying this wasn't the right time. She wasn’t ready. “Angela, wait.”

She kissed her way back up his chest before settling again on his lips. "I'm having fun, how about you?"

He moved her hair out of her face and tried to steady his breathing. "I am...lots of fun. But if nothing is happening tonight we need to-"

"Oh, uh…" She was unable to meet his eyes. "I'm not-"

"We just have to slow it down. That's all." He was confused about how she could not be ready, yet do whatever this was they were doing. But ultimately that didn't matter. Eric didn't want to do anything to rush her or wreck their relationship. He brushed his knuckles along her jaw and kissed her gently.

She returned the kiss before rolling to her side to lie beside him, pressing a warm palm to his chest and laying her head against his shoulder. His heart felt as if it could leave his chest at any moment it was beating so fast. It was a rush to know it was all because of her. She felt lightheaded, like she did that time sophomore year of high school when someone spiked the punch. It was intoxicating to know your partner wanted you. Getting that carried away hadn't been part of the plan, not that she had a plan. Planning would've required rational thought and she had been operating solely on instinct...with a healthy dose of hormones and emotion thrown in as well.

Eric's mind had drifted to baseball, his grandmothers, his grandmothers playing baseball...though how Nana Boo Boo would be able to round the bases in her wheelchair was a real head-scratcher. Would it work to her advantage or would it be easier for players to tag her out. And what about Grandma Bernice? There's no doubt in his mind that she'd drive her RV onto the field if needed: Bernice was ruthless. Despite the inanity in his brain he heard Angela's whispered thanks. "For what?"

Unable to look at him, she reached for his hand instead and laced their fingers together. "Most guys would be mad at me for starting something and not finishing it. They'd call me a tease or worse. Then they'd try to pressure me and lay guilt trips. Thank you for not making me feel bad."

"It sounds like something that's happened before."

She shrugged. "It never got them the results they wanted."

He was overcome with the urge to go beat up these faceless guys who pressured her. He hoped he never made a girl feel like that and it bothered him that he couldn't say for sure. "I'm not mad. Frustrated or disappointed, maybe, but not mad."

"You're sure? If you are and want to leave it's okay. I'll understand."

"Why would I be mad? My girlfriend wants me!" He laughed when she did, relieved to see her tension start to fade. "Trust me, there's no bigger turn on than that."

It seemed they were on the same page there. "Even if it's not happening tonight?"

"Even if it's not tonight. We just-we have to work on our signals. It would probably be a good idea to check in with each other before we're half naked." She nodded. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why did you think I was mad?"

"You were pretty quiet. That's an obvious sign with you. You're only quiet when you're upset."

"I was thinking."

"About what?"

"Nana Boo Boo and Grandma Bernice playing baseball," he admitted. "I think they'd both play dirty and cheat to win."

"I'm trying not to take that as an insult, but why are you thinking about them?"

"Because I'm a guy and when a guy is in this situation there are two outs: baseball and grandmothers. Don't ask me why. It's just the rule. So, you see, it's not an insult." He ran his hand along the curve of her hip and smiled when she automatically shifted closer. "It's a compliment. I need baseball and grandmothers. You have that much power."

"Very smooth."

"I thought so."

"Although 'I'm flattered' seems like the wrong response."

"Do you want me to go home?"

She shook her head. "Stay."

"You know, we could try again if you want. How else are we going to figure out our signals if we don't practice?"

"Practice? I suppose that's one word for it. Sure you can handle it," Angela teased.

He rolled over and draped his arm across her stomach. "Oh, I'll be fine. You on the other hand…" Eric traced the outline of her bra and removed one of the straps from her shoulder. He failed to hold back his grin when her breath hitched. "…what do you think of revenge?"

/

/

"Come on, Topanga, don't you think you're overreacting," Cory exclaimed, following his fiancée down the hall. "People fall asleep in the theatre all the time."

"Yes, but most people don't snore loud enough to disturb the actors on the stage!"

"I'm sorry. It's been a long week. Finals are coming soon, we're trying to plan a wedding, and Shawn is being Shawn. I'm tired. And you have to admit that the lead actor guy was boring. He had no personality."

She couldn't argue with him there. By the fourth monologue it was all she could do to stay awake herself. "Okay. I suppose the most important thing is that I got my extra credit and can keep my spot as number one in the class."

"That's the most important thing?"

"You got your extra credit, too. That will boost your average solidly to the middle of the pack."

"Wow. Okay, here I was going to say that the best part was we got out of this school and spent the evening together. It was school-related, but we still got out."

She came to a stop in front of her dorm. "You fell asleep."

"And your shoulder was my pillow," he said, taking hold of her hand. "What's more romantic than that?"

"I suppose it was nice to be out and once finals are over and summer is here we have some serious dating to catch up on."

He smiled. "I do like the sound of that."

"And I like the sound of you saying I do," she said, placing a hand over her heart.

"I do, too."

Topanga dug her keys out of her purse. "Tomorrow we devote the day to wedding planning so we can say it for real and soon."

"I do look forward to that. Too much," he asked when she wrinkled her nose at him.

"I do believe so." She put the key in the lock and struggled to turn it. "I swear, by the time maintenance comes to fix this thing we'll be old and gray, sending our kids here."

"Kids?" Cory moved to take the key. "Let me try."

"No, you're too noisy and Angela might be sleep-" The door finally opened and Topanga's jaw dropped at the sight that greeted her. Angela was in their room but there wasn't any sleeping going on. Cory's gasp was audible and she didn't need to look at him to know there was an epic freak out coming. She wasted no time shoving him back out into the hall and closed the door.

"Oh, my God! Topanga did-did you…oh, my God! They were-they-"

"I know. I have eyes." She pushed him around the corner and into the bathroom. "I guess she forgot to put a rubber band on the doorknob."

"A rubber band? That's what you're focusing on?"

"What would you rather I focus on?"

"I don't know, how about betrayal!"

"What betrayal?"

"Betrayal to us and our retinas, but mostly to poor Shawn not even twenty feet away." He rubbed his eyes. "We'll call it a tie between Shawn and my retinas. Ahh," he shrieked, rubbing harder.

"Did you poke yourself in the eye again?"

"I wish! It's them…the image of them. It's not going away!" He ran over to the sink and stuck his face under the faucet. "Make it stop!"

Topanga tried to decide what to do next. She couldn't very well hide out in the bathroom until Eric left, but she didn't want to barge in. Cory would cause a scene, a big one, without hesitation. She had visions of campus security being called, maybe men dressed in white with big butterfly nets, too. "I'll be right back."

He spun around to look at her, oblivious to the water he tracked all over the floor. "Are you going to confront them when they're in the middle of…" He scrunched his face up. "Oh no I just pictured it again!"

"Cory, quit it. They're two legal adults in a committed relationship."

"No, we're in a committed relationship. They should still be passing notes back and forth asking if they like each other. In the land of commitment they know nothing!"

"You need to calm down. I know you're surprised, me, too, but relax. Besides, if it makes you feel better I'm pretty sure they both still had their pants on."

"Oh, thank you, that's just what I need- more visuals in my head. And how hard were you looking if you saw pants?" Instead of offering another counter, she headed towards the door. "Where are you going?"

She shook her head. "I'm going to call Angela."

"Something tells me she's not going to answer."

"Then I will call until she does. I'll tell her I forgot my key and ask her to unlock the door for me in about a half hour when we get back to campus."

"But we're already here, Topanga."

"No, we're not. You're taking me out for pie."

"I am?"

"Yes, you are. That should give them enough time to...not be doing that."

Cory wanted to argue, but was silenced by the look on her face. "I'll have some pie. But you're paying."

"Fine."

"And I'm getting ice cream on the side."

/

/

"Cory, are you in here," Topanga called out as she entered the bathroom the following morning. "We were supposed to meet at eight to discuss wedding stuff. I just got off the phone with our top places. I need you to look at these dates. Venues are filling up fast."

"Nope, I'm wet and naked."

She followed his voice to one of the shower stalls. "So am I."

He peeked out from behind the curtain. "Liar!"

"Cory-"

"I can't look at wedding stuff when I'm naked. Now if we were talking the honeymoon that'd be different."

"Cory, there will be no wedding until I buy my dress and choose flowers. And I can't buy my dress or choose flowers until we pick a date. And if there is no wedding do you know what else that means? No honeymoon!"

"Will I ever get to see you naked?"

She rolled her eyes. It had been a while since he'd gone off on a tangent about them dying virgins. She suspected walking in on Eric and Angela last night was the trigger for today's rant. "Someday."

"Ooh, Sunday?"

"Cory!"

He turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. "I need a gesture of good faith. Show me your tushie!"

"You're being ridiculous."

"I'll show you mine."

"Nice butt, Cor."

"Ah!" He turned around and saw Angela standing there with a smirk on her face. "Don't you have another Matthews' butt to ogle?"

"What?"

"Nothing." He triple knotted his robe. "Just quit treating me like a piece of meat."

She shook her head and went over to the sink to brush her teeth. "It's too early for you to be this Cory."

"Cor, great news, I got a-" Shawn froze when he saw Angela. "Oh, hi."

She smiled at his reflection in the mirror. "Morning. So, what's the good news?"

"It's nothing."

"You sure?"

"Cory, here." Topanga pulled a razor out of her toiletry bag. "I ran out of razors so I borrowed yours'."

"You used my razor? The one I use on my face?"

"I needed to shave my legs. You don't mind, do you?"

"Mind? Don't be ridiculous! That only brings us much closer. I'm very happy about this newest development in our relationship."

"Good." She placed a legal pad on the bench. "Now please look at those wedding dates."

"Sure thing, my smooth one." As soon as she was around the corner he made a gagging noise and ran to the sinks. "I'm going to be sick."

"What?"

"She used my razor!"

"What's the big deal," Shawn asked. "I think it's sexy."

"I do, too," Angela chimed in.

"Her stubble on my face is sexy? You're all sick!"

"Topanga," she called out, "Cory's freaking out because you used his razor."

"Shut up you big liar."

"Why wouldn't you have just said something?"

"I don't mind." He laughed nervously. "I think you using my razor is very sexy."

She could tell he was lying through his teeth and held up the razor. "So, if I were to use this razor right now to shave under my arms, you'd be okay with that?"

"Sure." He watched in horror as she brought the razor to her underarm. "Oh, the humanity! Please don't!"

"Why wouldn't you have just told me the truth?"

"You don't want to hear the truth."

"Cory, if we're gonna be married, we have to be able to be totally honest with each other. We should learn from this." She nodded, her mind made up. "From now on: total honesty."

"It's a trap," Shawn hissed.

"So you're saying I can tell you the truth about everything?"

"Trap, trappity, trap, trap…"

"Yes."

"Trap. Such a big trap, you stupid idot."

Cory ignored his friend. "I can tell you exactly what I think with no fear of repercussion or lots and lots of yelling?"

"Knock yourself out."

"Topanga If you don't mind; keep your paws off my razor."

She handed it back. "Done."

"Huh. Honesty all the time. Okay. Don't drag me to anymore chick flicks. I hate them."

"All right, I suppose we can take turns picking-"

"And the Ice Capades! Hate 'em."

"Dear lord it's like watching a runaway train," Angela remarked to Shawn as Cory continued to list things he no longer wanted to do.

He nodded. "He's going to crash and never know what hit him."


	17. Chapter 17

"Do you think we expect Eric to fail?"

Amy looked up from feeding the baby. She'd barely gotten a good morning from her husband. He has been relatively quiet these past few days. She knew he was brooding over something, but wouldn't say what it was. "What are you talking about?"

"I told you about how he screwed up the deliveries a few days ago, right?"

"Twenty-four cases instead of twenty-four units. Yes, you did. What's this about expecting him to fail?"

"Angela showed up when we were discussing things."

"Were you discussing or yelling," she challenged.

"I don't see how that matters. But I can't get what she said to me out of my head. It's been bothering me. She said that maybe Eric wouldn't make so many mistakes if we didn't expect it from him."

"The last few years have been so back and forth with him I have whiplash."

"But he seems better lately, doesn't he? I mean he came to us to ask for more responsibility at the store. And his grades have improved so much."

"He definitely seems to have settled down over the past several months."

"What if it doesn't last? How many times have we hoped that he's grown up only to be let down? This is Eric that…" He realized what he was saying. "…that we're talking about." He sighed and fell into a chair. "Damn it, she's right."

"I don't know if I agree with her," she said after thinking it over for a minute. "It's not that we expect it, however, we are familiar with his past behavior. He set an unfortunate pattern over the years. It's more like we expect Eric to be, well, Eric." She lifted the baby to her shoulder to burp even though he was nearly asleep. "Although I will say these past few months have been a wonderful surprise. I could get used to this Eric. I feel like he's finally starting to scratch the surface of his potential and I think he realizes it, too."

He moved from the chair and sat beside her on the couch. "I suppose I could just not have him handle ordering and deliveries. That's where he keeps getting mixed up no matter how many times I walk him through it. New Eric or not, it seems impossible for him to keep all those numbers straight."

"I'm not implying you do it on purpose, but it seems like asking him to do that stuff is putting him in a position to fail. What does he do well at the store?"

"The displays are great since he started setting them up. He's pretty creative with that. And he can talk people into buying just about anything, and not in a slimy, shoddy, used car salesman type of way. He's just good at relating to them and getting them to let down their guard. Last week there was this guy that came in wanting the cheapest products and tried to get me to drop prices even more. I got fed up and dumped him on Eric. Twenty minutes later he's at the register paying for, not the highest end, but definitely more expensive stuff. I was ready to throw him out and Eric turned it into one of the biggest sales of the week."

"That doesn't surprise me. Eric has always known how to talk to people. When he was little he would talk to every random person we saw no matter how many times we told him not to. He has never met a stranger. Do you remember what he told me when he was about five?"

"What?"

"We were out getting him a new pair of shoes for his first day of kindergarten and he started talking to some woman. I warned him yet again about strangers and how not everyone feels like having a conversation with him. And he looked me right in the eye and said, 'Mommy, there are no strangers. I just haven't met all the people in the world yet. And when I do, they will all talk to me because I will be their friend."'

"That sounds like him."

"I marveled at his self-confidence. Maybe that's what you have to do: play to his strengths and have him do what he's good at, relating to people."

"But that's not going to help him learn the business side of things."

"Honey, Eric is not interested in the business. I know when we first took it over you had visions of you two working together side by side, buddies first and father and son second."

"That was only because he was flailing around without any direction. He wasn't even enrolled in college. The store was a safety net for him, for us. It was a guaranteed future."

"I don't think he needs a safety net anymore. He graduates in a year and he hasn't taken a single class that would prepare him to take over one day. It's not where his passions lie."

"Is he even passionate about anything aside from Angela lately?"

"Oh, no," she stated in mock disbelief, "a twenty-one year old guy wanting to spend every available moment with his girlfriend? I'll call Ripley's Believe it or Not. Or better yet, how about I get the Guinness Record Book people on the phone? They'll want to hear this."

"I get it."

The baby stirred in her arms and Amy got up and placed him in his bassinet. No need to wake him. "Let's just be glad Angela is a good influence and motivates him to do better. As far as his ambitions go, he still seems committed to this weatherman thing. It makes me feel bad for all the times we laughed at him when he brought it up as a kid. Although every time I ask him about school all he talks about is his geology class so maybe he could do something with that. It falls under his major."

"Yeah."

"There's something else on your mind."

"What do you mean?"

"It just seems like you're taking Angela's words to heart when she was likely just trying to stand up for her boyfriend. Considering how intense you can get when you're angry that took some guts on her part."

"I don't get intense."

"Yes, you do. While you're prone to overreact it takes a lot to get you really angry. But when you hit that point you're not exactly the most rational man to deal with."

Alan wanted to argue with his wife's remarks, but decided to let it go and stay focused. "Let's face it, if she thinks we expect Eric to fail she didn't get there all by herself, not based on the one disagreement she witnessed."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning Eric thinks we expect him to fail and told her that."

"I hope he doesn't believe that." She frowned. "I don't want him to think that."

"Neither do I. What do we do so he doesn't think that?"

"I think all we can do is be supportive, or more supportive."

"We've always supported him." He flashed back to what he told his eldest once about waiting too long to take off the kid gloves and let him grow. If anything they were guilty of supporting him too much at times.

"I guess we need to show him that we still do, no matter what."

"I don't know how to be more supportive of him."

"We still have to try. We're failing somewhere if he thinks we expect him to fall on his face. I'll call him later and tell him to come over for dinner and to bring Angela, too. I don't know why he hasn't brought her over yet." Amy covered her mouth to suppress a yawn. "Would you like to win the title of World's Best Husband and support me for a little bit?"

"I thought I already had that title in the bag."

She patted his hand. "Fine, then earn bonus points to keep your crown."

"What do you need?"

"I've been up with Joshua since four and-"

"Go take a nap." He also woke up with the baby, but the screaming child wanted only his mother- to be in her arms as she walked around the room. If she sat down he started crying again. Eventually Amy told him to go back to bed, that at least one of them should get to sleep in on a Saturday. "Sleep as long as you want."

She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "You've just secured the title for the next year."

"Good to know. Now get upstairs before Josh's radar goes off and he senses you're leaving." Once she was out of the room he checked on the baby before turning on the television. He kept the volume low and caught up on baseball highlights. When Morgan entered a few minutes later he gestured to the bassinet behind the couch so she would know to keep quiet.

"You and mom messed up at the hospital," she quipped, taking a seat next to her father on the couch.

"What do you mean?"

"You guys didn't bring home a baby. You brought home a car alarm that never shuts up."

Alan wanted to laugh, there were days he and Amy made similar remarks. "That's how babies are. You were the same way." She expressed disbelief before going back to her cereal. "Morgan, you know I'm proud of you, right?"

"Huh?"

"With school, all of your extracurricular activities, and hobbies- you always try your best and you never give up when stuff gets challenging. If something doesn't work out the way you want you give it another shot. You're never afraid to try something new."

"Dad, what's going on? Why are you getting all mushy? Oh, man," she exclaimed, "you and mom changed your mind about letting me go on vacation with Steph's family this summer, didn't you? That's not fair! You're saying this stuff so I won't be mad."

"Keep your voice down. And no, you can still go on vacation with your friend and her family."

"Then why are you being weird?"

"I just wanted to make sure you know that I'm proud of you. I'm always going to be proud of you no matter what you decide to do with your life. You know that, right?"

"Duh, dad, I'm not a moron."

Sometimes Alan forgot that his little girl was approaching her teen years. Then she said stuff like that to remind him. "Good. I just wanted to be sure."

"Can I have the remote and put on something people actually want to watch?"

He rolled his eyes but handed over the remote. All things considered she was still much easier to deal with than her brothers had ever been. As if on cue, Josh began to scream from his bassinet. Alan jumped up to get him before Amy came down. He walked in circles around the room, the baby fussing in his ear. "I should've had all daughters."

/

/

"Angela, can I…oh, sorry, I didn't know you went back to bed." Topanga closed the door quietly. After the encounter in the bathroom she got breakfast with Cory so they could discuss wedding venues. She didn't expect to come back and find Angela sleeping again. She was wearing an eye mask and there was an ice pack and ear plugs on the nightstand. "Migraine," she asked in a hushed voice.

"I think I caught it in time. Medication is kicking in. I'm just resting my eyes."

"Do you want me to go so it's quiet?" While she didn't experience the crippling headaches herself, her mother did and every so often would retreat to her room, needing absolute quiet and darkness. "I'll tell Cory and Shawn not to make a peep or risk my wrath."

"Thanks, I appreciate that, but I'm fine. I was going to get up in a few minutes anyway."

"Well, if you're sure."

"I am."

She placed her bag on the chair and sat down at the foot of Angela's bed. "Can I run something by you?"

"Sure. What's going on?"

"You know this honesty pact I'm doing with Cory?"

"You mean the thing that is going to blow up in your faces?"

"What does that mean? Why do you think it's going to go badly?"

She sat up and removed her eye mask, wincing as she adjusted to the light. "What about the honesty pact?"

"I'd like to think that Cory will tell me the truth no matter what, but how can I be sure?"

"You can't be sure and he probably won't be honest all of the time. You won't be either. There's going to be little white lies, lies of omission, and-"

"I think if anyone could do it, it would be us. But just to be sure…I have an idea."

Angela listened to Topanga explained her plan. It was all she could to keep a neutral expression on her face.

"Well, what do you think?"

"Honestly?"

"That is the name of the game, so yes."

"You're going to make yourself look ridiculous on purpose and then he's going to have to either tell you that you do look ridiculous or he'll say you look great no matter what. And the ironic part is you'll be mad when he tries to be nice to you because he loves you so much."

"Because it will be a lie."

"But he's not going to want to say you look bad. He's going to spare your feelings."

"Not if he's honest with me."

"It's not very fair. Cory's not always my favorite person and lately he's been a gigantic pain in my butt, but you are putting him in a no-win situation."

"If he's honest then it's not no-win, it's we both win."

She shook her head. "Wow."

"What?"

"I don't know if I've ever seen such an intelligent person act so stupid."

Topanga thought that statement was especially ironic coming from Eric's girlfriend. Sometimes he still acted like a trained circus seal when Angela wasn't around, though he was getting better. She knew better than to say any of that to Angela, however. "I think you're wrong. This exercise can only bring me and Cory closer."

"And I think you're asking for trouble."

"Does this mean you're not going to help me?"

"Help you?"

"Renee- you've met her, she's in my advanced geometry class- anyway she has a hair crimper I can borrow."

"I want no part in this insanity."

_'Again, another ironic statement coming from Eric's girlfriend,'_ Topanga thought to herself. "Fine, I guess I'll see if Renee wants to help me."

"That's probably a good idea." She got out of bed and went to the closet.

"What are you doing?"

"I think I'll head over to the apartment now."

"This early? It's barely noon and we're not supposed to be there until seven. Did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me?"

"I just don't understand why you're looking for trouble. You know how Cory is. You know he's going to take your honesty pact one step too far. Why give him ammunition?"

"You're looking at this the wrong way. If Cory is honest about something as sensitive as looks, then I know he won't hesitate with the bigger things."

She shook her head. "For the record, I'm reserving the right to say 'I told you so' when this blows up in your face. And it will. Spectacularly."

"I guess I have more faith than you do."

"Faith…naiveté…whichever."

"You don't have to leave just because you disagree with what I'm doing," Topanga said as Angela continued to move around their room. She was putting her clothes into an overnight bag.

"I'm not. I'm going to see if I can give Rachel a hand. If she doesn't need help then I'll just hang out with Eric. We didn't get to see each other much this week aside from our date yesterday."

"And the clothes?"

"I'm not getting dressed for a party now. I'll change there."

"How was your date last night?" When she finally got back into her room Eric was still here. He was with Angela in her bed and they claimed they had dozed off while watching TV. Even if she hadn't walked in on them, their disheveled clothes gave them away. Still, she gave no indication she saw anything. "You never told me about it. Did you do anything fun?"

"We went to the science museum, arcade, I finally got to check out that bookstore I've wanted to go to- a former warehouse filled floor to ceiling with books. I was in heaven. We got lunch, had dinner, and there was a movie in between. Then we came back here and fell asleep watching TV."

"Wow, that's sounds like three or four dates crammed into one. No wonder you guys fell asleep."

She shrugged. "We have a lot of fun and enjoy being together. Why not take advantage of that when we can? Especially with how crazy our schedules are lately."

"It wasn't a criticism. What are you looking for," she asked when Angela was moving things around the room.

"I can't find my makeup. Is it on your side?"

Topanga looked around before ultimately finding the cosmetic bag on her dresser, under a few folded sweaters. "Here you go."

Angela was about to take it when it was pulled back. "What?"

"Are you sure you don't want to help me with my hair?"

She retrieved her makeup bag from her friend's grasp. "I'm steering clear of this train wreck. You're on your own. I just hope you know what you're doing."

"I do. You'll see."

/

/

"What the heck are you doing?" Jack came down the stairs and saw Rachel hunched over the counter. "I thought we were having a dinner party, not a lunch party. Why are you doing all this now? Ooh, appetizers," he said, grabbing a few vegetables from the tray.

"I want everything to be nice for our friends tonight. I'm making radish roses. See?" She held one up to him. "Pretty."

He took the radish and popped it into his mouth. "Mmm, good."

A look of horror came across her face. "What did you just do?"

"I'm trying your beautiful radish roses." She did not look happy. "Is that not the right answer?"

"There were no radish roses. Not yet. There was only the one so far."

Oops. "I'm sorry. If it's any consolation it tastes great, best radish I've ever eaten." Jack could tell from her glare that his compliments were of no consolation to her right now. "But I'm sure you'll be able to make more. How long could it take to carve one of these babies- five minutes?"

"It took me a half hour to do just the one," she said, exasperated.

"Oh…I'll help you make more."

"Yeah, you will."

Jack was relieved when the doorbell rang a few minutes later. He'd been struggling with carving the rose petals and was desperate for a break. "I'll get it." He jumped up and ran for the door. "Angela, hey."

"I know I'm extremely early, but I thought I'd come by and see if Rachel needed any help." She was surprised when Jack grabbed her arm and pulled her inside the apartment. "Okay, hi, how are you?"

"Help me," he whispered, before going back to speaking at a normal volume. "See, Rach, it's going to be okay. You have someone to help with radish roses."

"I know I do," she responded in a voice entirely too sweet to be natural, "I have you."

"Crap, should've figured it wouldn't be that easy."

"You got that right," Rachel continued. "Actually, Angela, I think I have a good handle on things right now. The Cornish hens are marinating and those don't have to start going into the oven until four. The baked potatoes will be easy enough, but if you want, I could use some help later to make the parfaits. I'm saving those for last."

"Sounds great. I guess I'll go hang out with Eric. Is he in his room?"

"No, he's working the coffeehouse today. You didn't see him?"

"I didn't get coffee this morning. That explains my migraine," she said, mostly to herself, "no caffeine yet. I forgot he was working today."

"He'll be home in a little while. You can hang around if you want."

She smiled. "Thanks."

/

"That was the longest six hour shift ever. Please, no one mention the word coffee," Eric declared when he entered his apartment, but realized he was talking to no one. Jack and Rachel weren't around and it was silent. That was weird. When he left for his shift this morning she was panicking about finding a way to get all the food cooked in time when they only had the one small oven. He expected her to be having an even bigger freak out when he got back. Just as he was about to swipe a few chips she bought for appetizers he saw a piece of paper with his name on it taped to the fridge. _'Eric,'_ he read aloud, _'went to the store. DO NOT touch the food for tonight. I will know. And I will hurt you.'_ He was still tempted to take the chips, or even a few carrots, but thought better of it. Rachel really wanted tonight to go well. He got a pack of Pop Tarts from the cabinet and headed for his room. There was enough time to get in a nap before people got here.

There was another surprise waiting for him when he entered his room: Angela. Not just Angela, but Angela in his bed, under his blankets, and with her head on his pillow. He wanted to think this was meant to be a romantic surprise, but since she was sleeping he figured it wasn't. After ditching his shoes and trading the button-down he had to wear at work for a T-shirt, he lay down beside her. She immediately gravitated towards him. "Hey. Didn't mean to wake you up."

"That's okay."

"Am I dreaming or are you really in my bed right now?"

She scooted closer and laid her head on his chest. "How can you be dreaming if I'm the one sleeping?"

"Good point."

Angela kept her eyes closed. She heard him come in but had been having the nicest dream and was reluctant to leave it. She and Eric were driving in his car, no destination in particular in mind, they were just driving. And there was no one around for miles: no Cory, no Shawn, no Topanga, no jobs, studying, or classes. It was only them. "Sorry I just showed up."

"You don't hear me complaining, do you?"

"Thanks." She tightened her hold on him and nuzzled his neck. "Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"How would you feel if I used your razor?"

"What?"

"Would it gross you out?"

"Did you run out and need to borrow one?"

"No."

Eric made a face. "This is a really random question. Why would you ever need to use my razor?"

"Let's say I wake up here one morning and need to take a shower before class."

"I'm loving this mental image."

"I figured you would. So I need to take a shower and forgot to pack a razor. Would it bother you to share?"

"The truth?"

"Of course."

"Part of me thinks it would be hot- at least legs. Anything else you shave I don't need to know about."

"Very mature."

"But any hotness would be over the second I cut myself. You'd dull the blade and I'd end up walking around with little bits of toilet paper stuck to my face. That's not so hot."

She raised her head to look at him, a smile on her face. "A rational explanation, thank you."

"Where did all this razor talk come from?"

She sighed. "Topanga and Cory made an honesty pact."

"What does that mean?" She filled him in on what happened in the bathroom this morning. He laughed. "Man, is that going to blow up in their faces. Cory doesn't know when to quit."

"I know, but they are determined to tell each other truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth."

"So help them God?"

"They're definitely going to need somebody's help." She told him Topanga's plan for tonight.

"But it sounds like she's trying to trap him into saying the wrong thing. He can't win."

"That's what I told her, but she insists everything will be fine."

"It does make you think though. Is there such a thing as too much honesty? If so, where is the line?"

"I don't know if there's such a thing as too much, but presentation goes a long way."

"What do you mean?"

"Like if I thought the shirt you were wearing was ugly I wouldn't say it that way. I'd say you'd look better in another color that brings out your eyes."

"What shirt of mine is ugly?"

"It was just an example."

"It was a very specific example. Be straight with me: it's this shirt, right? It's a boring, white t-shirt. How can you hate it?"

She propped her elbow on his chest and rested her head in her hand. "Are you kidding me right now?"

"Sorry," he said. "I guess I see what you mean: be honest, but don't go out of your way to try and hurt the other person while you do it."

"Pretty much, yeah, and accept the fact that people lie even without meaning to sometimes. There are lies of omission, little white lies, and-"

"The lies people tell to keep the peace and avoid hurting each other," he filled in. "I'll try not to do any of that."

"Me, too." Angela groaned when her phone rang, expecting it to be Topanga. She was just going to let it ring, but figured if she didn't get it the calls would keep coming. "Hello? Oh, hi, Nan. Yes, I know. It has been a while."

"Your grandmother," Eric whispered. She nodded in response.

"Actually this isn't really a good time. I have a lot of homework and studying to do. You know how crazy it is with finals coming up." She listened to her grandmother. "I know. Can I call you next week when things aren't so busy? We can make a plan to get together then. Okay. I'll call you next week. Yes, I promise…Nan, I said I will. I will! Okay. Yes. I love you, too. Bye." She ended the call and placed the phone back on the nightstand.

"What did she want?"

"She wants me to come over, says she has something important to discuss with me."

"Why are you putting her off?"

"I'm not. I'll call when I'm less busy."

"Come on, Angela, I think that's one of those white lies or lies of submission."

"Omission," she corrected.

"Whatever. There's more than enough time before dinner that if you wanted to go see her now I could drive you."

"I can't deal with her right now. I already told you we're not close. We haven't talked much since I moved out and started college. She talks to my mother, after everything she did to me Nan still sees her. As a general rule I don't associate with people who are in contact with that woman."

"I know it's your mother, but it's still her daughter. I can understand why it would be hard for your grandmother to walk away from that."

"My mother had no problem separating herself from her daughter."

"Angela-"

"No. I don't want to talk about it."

"But you should-"

"I said no." She rolled away from him and sat up. "I don't want to talk about it so we're not talking about it now."

"I didn't want to talk about my parents, working at the store, and crap with my dad last week but you made me. How is that different from now?"

She got out of his bed and walked around the room. "It's different because I was helping."

"That's what I'm trying to do now but you're not letting me."

"In the interest of honesty- you're being really annoying right now."

"Right back at you." The silence seemed to stretch forever, but couldn't have been more than thirty seconds or so. "I'm sorry."

"Me, too. I don't like arguing with you," she admitted, leaning back against his dresser.

"I don't like it either."

"I'm sorry I called you annoying."

"Eh, I've been called worse."

"Don't talk like that."

"I'm just stating the truth."

"That doesn't mean I like it." Angela walked back over to the bed. "But I do like that we can have a stupid little disagreement and not have it get out of hand."

Eric reached for her hand and pulled her into his lap. "You're happy we got on each other's nerves?"

"I'm happy that we can call each other out on it and not fall to pieces." Her arms went around his neck. "I think that's the important part. Neither one of us stormed out or had a fit because we didn't see eye to eye."

"I guess you're right. I still don't like arguing though."

"Me either." She leaned her forehead against his before kissing him softly. "Making up, though…"

He smiled. "Oh, yeah, making up is the fun part. You want a celebratory Pop Tart?"

"Wait, what?" She pulled away from him. "Is that a euphemism or something?"

"Huh?"

"What do you mean by Pop Tart?"

He reached behind her and grabbed the foil package, holding it up to her. "Pop Tarts. They're the s'mores kind- the best kind."

"Oh," she replied with a chuckle, "you mean an actual Pop Tart."

"Yeah. I didn't get to eat lunch and I'm hungry. What did you think I meant?"

"Not a Pop Tart."

"Then what…oh! You know, one thing I love about you is that your mind goes right to the gutter almost every time."

"It must be your influence. You're corrupting me."

"Then my plan is working perfectly." They both jumped when the sound of a door slamming echoed through the apartment. "Jack and Rachel must be back from the store." Next they heard pots and pans banging around. "And it sounds like she is still in panic mode."

"Maybe I should go out there," Angela said, not moving from his lap. "I said I'd help her with the parfaits. It's dessert," she added, noting his confused look.

"Yummy." He tightened his hold on her waist when she tried to get up. "Wait a minute."

"What?" The sounds of pots and pans continued. "We should go out there and make sure Rachel doesn't go nuts and kill Jack in the process."

"You're right. If Jack's dead I'd have to pay more for rent."

/

/

"Okay, Cory, I get it," Topanga exclaimed, exasperated.

"Is the _'I stuck my finger in the electrical socket'_ look in now?"

He'd been making comments since they left. "You tell me, Brillo head!" She rang the doorbell.

"Hey!"

"Can we move on now?"

"You can't get mad at me. Honesty pact, remember?"

Topanga forced a smile on her face when Jack opened the door. "Hi, and yes, Cory has made his dislike of my hair well known."

Jack wasn't quite sure how to respond to that. "Um…hi? And okay."

"No, honey, I don't dislike your hair."

"You don't?"

"No I hate…well, hate may not be strong enough." He thought for a moment. "Nope, hate sums it up perfectly! I think whoever did this to you should be taken outside, tied down, and made to look at it." Cory saw that Jack looked bewildered by his comments. "Don't worry, we have an honesty pact. Nothing bad can happen to me."

"Good luck with that."

/

Angela could hear Cory ranting away as she and Eric came down the hall. She couldn't help but laugh.

"What," Eric asked.

"It sounds like Cory and Topanga got here and I think I get to tell her I told you so."

"That's always fun. Hey, wait a minute." He reached out and held her hand. "Are you going to be okay tonight?"

"What do you mean?"

"This dinner: Shawn being here, Cory being obnoxious…"

She smiled at his concern. "I'm fine. Is it going to be weird for you?"

"I think I'll be okay."

"Let's just hope they behave. For their sake they'd better."

"We should kiss for luck just to be sure."

"You know you don't have to invent weird excuses to kiss me." She found herself being pulled closer before their lips met. "See," she whispered, kissing him again, "no excuses."

"So we can just head back to my room and continue this?"

"Sorry."

"If things get ugly in there can we sneak out the fire escape?"

"Please." She kissed him once more before leading him down the hall. "I'll be half way out the window before you even realize things have gone to hell."

/

"I like your hair, Topanga," Rachel said hesitantly.

"I don't!"

The doorbell rang. "Oh, please let that be someone with a gag," Jack muttered under his breath. He opened the door and saw his brother on the other side. "Shawn! You're here."

"I said I was coming, didn't I?"

"I wasn't sure if you meant it." It was then he noticed that Shawn wasn't alone. "You brought someone?"

"That's okay, right?"

"Sure. Hi," he said, smiling at the mystery guest. "I'm Jack, Shawn's brother."

"Hi, I'm Shawna."

"Shawn and-and Shawna?"

"Yeah, we just met the other day. We were both getting coffee off campus and the barista mixed up our cups," she explained.

"Well, come on in. Hey, guys," he announced, "Shawn's here and he brought a date."

He elbowed his brother in the back. "Thanks for calling attention to us."

"What?"

"I mean…" He caught sight of Angela and Eric coming down the stairs hand in hand. "I-I don't want her to feel uncomfortable meeting a bunch of new people all at once."

She chuckled. "That's very sweet, Shawn, but I'm a communications major. Talking is my life. I can handle meeting your brother and your friends."

Cory rushed over. "Hi, Shawna. Oh, hey…Shawn and Shawna? How cute is that? I'm sure I don't even need to introduce myself. I'm sure Shawn has told you all about me. Cory?"

"Um…nope, sorry, he hasn't mentioned you once."

" _What?!_ "

She hit his arm. "Relax, I'm joking. He's talked more about you than he has himself. I am, however, confused about what a Topanga is. Is it a type of bird?"

"That's her right over there," he said, gesturing to the couch. "Smile and wave, honey. Yep, that's my fiancée. Come on over and I'll introduce you to her hair. I hate it."

"Oh, my god, Cory's like a dog with a bone," Angela remarked, having watched the scene from the kitchen. She was relieved to see Shawn brought a date. Maybe he was finally moving on and things will be less awkward.

"Yep, I say Topanga beats him over the head with a newspaper before dessert," Eric said.

"Rach, you okay? Jack noticed his girlfriend had paled considerably and was staring at the food. "What's wrong?"

"There are eight people."

"What?"

"Eight people! I only made food for seven. I have seven Cornish hens, seven baked potatoes, and seven parfaits. Seven of everything!"

"It will be okay," Angela reassured.

"How?"

"Eric and I will share. This way nothing gets ruined."

"Whoa, wait a second, when did we hit the food sharing stage of the relationship? Is this because I gave you that Pop Tart? That wasn't meant to be the gateway to all my food. I was just being a nice guy."

She rolled her eyes. "Look at it this way, if you share food with me there will be more room on your plate for tater tots."

"Ooh, good point…genius, actually. I do love the tater tots."

"See, Rach," Jack said, putting his hands on her shoulders, "everything is going to be okay. This party will go off without a hitch."

She took a deep breath. "You're right. I'm sorry I freaked out."

"That's okay. I've gotten used to it."

"What?"

"But that's okay. You're cute when you freak out."

"You're such a bad liar," she said with a smile before kissing his cheek. "But I appreciate it." She got up from the stool and walked into the living room. "Okay, everyone since we have a little bit of time before the food is ready I thought we could play a game."

"What's the game?"

"Well, listening to Cory and Topanga go on and on and on about honesty made me think of this game we used to play in high school. It was an honesty game. We put our names into a hat and whoever's name you draw you can ask them anything you want." She could see everyone looked skeptical. "Come on, who's afraid of a little honesty?"

"Cory and I aren't," Topanga spoke up.

"That's right," he agreed. "Honesty's a cinch for us. Bring on the game!"

"Great. I'll get the hat."

"Get an extra one for Topanga!"

"You're such an idiot," Shawn whispered into his friend's ear.

"Come on, Shawnie, it's an evening of honesty among friends. What could possibly go wrong?"


	18. Chapter 18

"How do we decide who asks first?"

"Well, we can go clockwise," Topanga suggested, "counterclockwise, or we can make it easy and go alphabetically."

"Let's do that one," Angela said.

"Says the person whose name starts with an A," someone called out sarcastically.

"You say that like it's my fault."

"I figured this would be a debate," Rachel said, holding up two hats. "The baseball cap is for determining who gets asked questions and I will draw names from this hat to-"

"Hey, I didn't say you could borrow my Goofy hat. He autographed it for me and everything. See, right under the ear is his signature. It was the first time in my life where someone writing to me in red ink wasn't a bad thing."

"Don't worry, Eric, we won't damage your hat. Okay, I'm pulling a name to see who asks a question first." She dug into the Goofy hat and pulled out a piece of paper. "Looks like it's sort of alphabetical to start. Angela, you ask first." She held out the baseball cap. "Draw a name and then think of a really personal question."

"Can I make a suggestion," Shawna asked. "I mean, I know I'm a guest here, but..."

"It's okay. What is it?"

"I've played these kinds of games before, too, and the questions people always ask are about your relationship. What do you dislike about your partner or what would you change...stuff like that. It made it boring. No one asked anything else. What my friends would do is after the person doing the asking got their question answered, they and their partner each had to answer a relationship question. This way there was a healthy variety." She glanced at Shawn, realizing they couldn't add to this particular topic. They'd only just met. She wasn't even sure this could be considered a date. "It's just a thought."

"No, it's good. I like it. We'll do it."

"Gee, Rach, you're not going to poll the room first," Cory teased.

"My dinner party my rules. If you don't like it you know where the door is." She smiled when he held up his hands in defeat. "Come on, Angela, draw a name."

She closed her eyes and shuffled the scraps of paper around the hat before choosing one. "Ooh, Topanga."

"Uh-oh. You are my roommate and best friend. You know too much about me."

"Let me think of a good one." After a minute or so she snapped her fingers. "I've got it. Topanga?"

"Yes?"

"How exactly did you become valedictorian?"

"What do you mean? I studied hard and worked my butt off."

"Oh, is that why the fiancé has yet to see it? It's disappeared? And here I thought it ran away from the atrocity on your head you're calling hair."

"Cory, I swear, you are on such thin ice right now."

"Honesty pact. You can't-"

"Most people would take studying and hard work at face value," Angela continued, "but then most people wouldn't remember you whining about how after all the work you put in you were still either going to tie or come in second to...what's his name...the blond guy with the glasses?"

"Stuart?"

"Minkus," Cory broke in after noticing Angela didn't recognize his first name.

"Yeah, Minkus. I can never remember that," she muttered and shook her head. "Anyway, you were upset you might have to share the valedictorian title, if not "settle" for being salutatorian depending on your grade point averages. And then one day you were no longer upset. You said whatever happens, happens and we have to wait and see. A few days later you were named valedictorian."

Topanga narrowed her eyes and stared down her friend. "Angela, what are you getting at?"

"All I'm saying is that when Minkus claimed you did something you did not deny it. You didn't confirm it either, but you did not deny. You just told him to go count those A's again."

"Yes and when he did he found that I had one more than him."

"But how?"

She glanced around the room and shifted in her chair. Everyone was staring at her. "You remember that last assignment Mr. Feeny gave us? The essay he said wouldn't count towards our grades?"

"Vaguely."

"I demanded an A for it," Topanga stated with a smirk and a shrug. She only hoped she gave off her typical aura of confidence. "He knew I deserved it so he gave it to me."

"Yeah," Angela answered slowly, dragging out the syllables, "I don't buy it."

"Excuse me?"

"There is no way he would let you intimidate him into giving you an A especially when no one else was even getting a grade, especially students with poor grades who could've benefitted from it- like Shawn."

"Hey!"

"It was a meaningless A, a vanity A. That's why he had no issue giving it to me."

"It was an A that could have tipped the scales in deciding who was going to be valedictorian. Mr. Feeny would not just give that away. He is nothing if not a fair man."

She shook her head. "I changed my mind. I don't want to play this game."

"But you already agreed to the rules," Rachel said, torn between wanting to keep the peace and find out what Topanga was hiding. "Besides, you and Cory are our 'honesty's the best thing ever' ambassadors."

"This whole honesty thing was your idea." Shawn was initially going to keep quiet, but Topanga brought this on herself. It was almost funny. He thought this was going to bite Cory on the ass, not her. "Remember what you said to Cory- total honesty. Now what, first question and you're going to be the one to bail?"

"I didn't do anything," she said, barely keeping the growl out of her voice. "I deserved to be valedictorian." She crossed her arms and stared directly at Angela. "I hate you for asking this, you know?"

"I'm just playing by your all honesty, all the time rules. If you have nothing to hide then what's the big deal?"

"For the record I would like to emphasize that I, personally, did nothing. Okay? Is that clear? I didn't even know anything had been done until afterwards. In fact I still don't know if anything was done. The guy could've been bluffing."

"What are you talking about," Cory asked.

"Do you remember Philip?"

"Was he the guy that carried a telescope everywhere?"

"It was a microscope. He kept it with him in his backpack in case he saw something he wanted to investigate."

"That doesn't make it any less weird."

"He was in my computer class and heard me talking about being neck and neck with Minkus. He'd hated Minkus ever since he lost to him in a chess tournament and said he could fix things for me so I was valedictorian. I thought he was joking so I laughed it off. A couple days later the announcements were made. I was valedictorian and Minkus was salutatorian. We were separated by one A and a tenth of a point in our grade point averages."

"Philip changed your grades?"

"That's what he claimed. I asked what he did and he said he added extra credit assignments to my English class. He swears he didn't change anything with Minkus's grades."

"How did he even know how to change grades?"

"I didn't ask any questions. I still wasn't sure he was serious."

"Why didn't you tell Mr. Feeny?"

"I had no proof. All I had was the word of a weirdo with a microscope. There was just as much a chance in my mind that Mr. Feeny gave me my bonus A. Besides, I worked my whole life to be valedictorian. I had come too far to come in second place or share the title. I deserved it."

"So did Minkus."

"What are you going to do, turn me in?"

"It's a little late for that." Cory shook his head. He knew his fiancée could get insanely competitive in her quest for academic perfection, but sometimes he forgot how much being the best mattered to her. "You were wrong, Topanga."

"But I didn't-"

"A lie of omission is still a lie. I think this falls into that category. Even if Phillip didn't change anything the possibility is out there. Now it makes sense why you had Shawn give the speech- you felt guilty. If you truly felt like you deserved it you would've delivered the speech you've had written since fourth grade."

"Yeah, she pawned the speech off on someone even less worthy than her," Shawn teased and lightly punched Topanga in the arm.

"It's not like Minkus is doing poorly. He got a free ride to MIT and according to Mr. Feeny already has a summer internship lined up at NASA. That's huge. He's going to be fine."

"That's some nice rationalization," Angela remarked.

"Why did you have to ask me about that," Topanga snapped. "Graduation was almost a year ago. Why bring it up now? I had finally stopped feeling guilty."

"Your guilt has nothing to do with me. I was just playing the game. The whole point is to get intimate and personal with these questions, right?"

"In that case, I believe it's yours' and Eric's turns to each answer a question about your relationship. Eric?"

"Yes," he responded with a hint of apprehension, not knowing what was going to follow.

"Name one thing you would change about Angela."

"Uhh-" He glanced at his girlfriend. "Something I'd change?"

"Eric, it's okay. I'm not perfect. There's got to be at least one thing that drives you crazy."

"Your pants."

She almost spit out her drink, not expecting that to come out of his mouth. "Excuse me?"

"I don't care about your clothes one way or another because you look amazing in everything. And it's not even the all the colors on them…although there are _so_ many…but they're shiny. Why are your pants super shiny? It looks you raided a clown's pajama drawer."

Angela laughed before leaning in to kiss him. "You really don't like them?"

"I'm this close to giving you a rainbow wig and a big, red nose, Bozo."

"Okay."

"Nope, sorry," Rachel broke in. "We're going to need a little more than that."

"But I hate her pants. I answered the question honestly."

"I know you did. And you gave it that special Eric flair, too, but this is about getting to know each other better. There's got to be something else about Angela that irritates you."

"Come on," Angela said. "Let me have it."

He took a deep breath. "We were talking about this earlier, but you need to respect when I don't want to talk about something and just leave it alone. God help me if I press you when you're not ready to deal with a situation. You flip out. So I try to step back. I really wish you would give me that same respect instead of trying to make me talk. Sometimes I need to think things out for myself first. If I want to talk to you and get your opinion I know where to find you."

"You're right," she said. She took his hand and laced their fingers together. "I only do it because I want to help, but you're right. I need to respect you and give you space when you don't want to talk the same way to try to do for me. I'll work on that."

"Thank you."

"Angela, same question: what would you change about Eric?"

She debated momentarily before answering. "I wish you would let more people see the Eric that I get to see. You're such an amazing person with so much to offer. I'm honored to be the one you let in, but it kills me that you keep so much of yourself hidden from the world."

"Speaking for the world," Cory interrupted, raising his hand, "some of us have seen more of Eric than we'd care to lately."

"Cory!"

"Ow! Don't pinch me with your nails!"

"Topanga, what is he talking about?"

"We sort of walked in on you guys last night."

"Oh." She looked to Eric who simply shrugged. "Oh. I thought it was weird that you called saying you forgot your key. Now it makes sense. So, who's next?"

"That's all you're going to say," he exclaimed. "I may have been scarred for life. I still see you guys when I close my eyes. We're talking permanent retinal damage here."

"Cor," Eric broke in, "unless you're going to ask for make out tips- because I'm guessing you're a little boring in that department-"

"Hey! Topanga, defend me."

She buried her face in her hands. "Oh, my God!"

"If you're not asking for pointers then it's time for someone to pick a name from the hat."

The evening went on, the game continued amidst the appetizers and Rachel's apologies for the dinner delays. The oven was small and could only handle a couple hens at a time. She thought she had given herself enough time to cook them all. She hadn't. "This is a disaster," she cried.

"Come on, Rach, no, it's not. People are having fun."

"Only half of us have our dinner. That's the definition of a failed dinner party."

"We fed our guests first. That's important."

"Angela's a guest and she's not eating yet."

"Rachel, I'm good," she reassured her. "I'll eat with you guys and Eric. Besides, I'm sharing with him anyway."

"See? Everyone is happy."

"I'm not. You promised me tater tots and I haven't seen one sign of a tot."

"Eric, we only have one oven and you broke the deep fryer a few weeks ago when you filled it with marshmallows."

"Oh, yeah, forgot about that."

Angela frowned. "Marshmallows in the deep fryer?"

"I couldn't sleep, it was two in the morning, and the guy on one of those cooking shows did it and it worked!"

"Yes, but he also prepped them first," Rachel said. "That's the part Eric forgot. He just dumped an entire bag in. Jack and I woke up to this terrible smell and the smoke detector going off. And then the shouts of, 'go back to sleep, it's fine.' You know, real reassuring stuff especially coming from him."

"What do you mean especially-"

"Let's keep playing the game," Eric interjected. He appreciated how quick Angela was to come to his defense, but sometimes he just did stupid stuff- like marshmallows in the deep fryer at two in the morning kind of stupid. "There are just a couple names left, right?"

"Yeah, I can wait for more heart stopping revelations like Jack not being able to stand that I leave hair in the shower drain," Rachel teased. Jack sighed. "Come on, it took you twenty minutes and that was the best you could come up with. I don't buy it."

"Fine. I hate when you put me on the spot in front of people like you're doing right now. You do that all the time."

"See? That's real. That's all I wanted." She kissed his cheek before picking a name from the Goofy hat. "Topanga, you're turn to ask."

"Finally." She reached into the baseball cap and picked up the first piece of paper she felt. "Shawn."

"Oh, geez. This is almost as bad as Cory asking me a question."

One question popped into her head and, though a little voice told her not to ask, that it would only lead to trouble, she couldn't seem to help herself. "Shawn, if you could spend one night with anyone, no strings attached, who would it be with?"

"Anyone in the world with no strings?"

"Yep and remember, be honest."

"In that case I'd pick Angela."

"What the hell?" Eric slammed his glass onto the table before standing. "Are you kidding me right now?"

Angela grabbed his arm. "Eric, wait." She pulled him away from the group and into the kitchenette. "Just wait a minute."

"What?"

"Do you trust me," she asked, taking his hands.

"Yes, but…"

She kissed him briefly, cutting off his response. "Then trust me."

"Angela…"

She pivoted on her heel and went back to the living area. "So with no strings, no commitment, and no emotional attachment you'd have sex with me?"

Shawn took a deep breath. "Yeah." He had nothing left to lose at this point. "What do you say to that?"

"Let's go."

"What," he choked out in response, sputtering the water he'd been sipping.

"You heard me."

He looked at Eric, but seething rage had been replaced with confusion. "I don't-"

"This is what you wanted right? Should we go into a bedroom or…no, I know, we'll do it right here, right now." Angela fell backwards and lay on the red couch. "Come on, Shawn. What are you waiting for? You do remember how this part works, right?"

"Why-"

"Why not? You obviously have such little respect for me and my relationship that it shouldn't matter where you take me."

Shawn was well aware that the entire room was watching him. "Not like this," he mumbled.

"You sure about that?" Angela jumped at the sound of a door slamming, the force of which shook the apartment. It took only a few seconds for her to realize that Eric was no longer here. _Crap._ She got up and dashed for the stairs.

"Where are you going?"

"I have to tighten the knots in my strings."

"Okay, I think it's time to ask the asker a question," Rachel jumped in, trying to keep things moving. "We'll do this together. Topanga, Cory, what would you change about your relationship?"

Cory put a finger to his chin and pondered the question. "Let's see, what would I change about a relationship that, to paraphrase Mary Poppins, is practically perfect in every way? That is a head scratcher."

"Come on, Cory, just make your joke about how we're going to die virgins so we can all move on with our lives."

"Actually I think I'd change your crazy need to be perfect all the time."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah, you need to lighten up, Topanga. Relax a little."

"I don't need to be perfect."

"Please," he scoffed. "From preschool to college you have been obsessed with being the best at everything. You've always had to be number one. In fact you may have indirectly screwed Minkus out of being valedictorian in your quest for perfection."

"Oh yeah, if I want to be perfect so badly then why did I give up Yale? Why am I here with you?

"What?"

/

"Eric," Angela called out as she knocked on his door. "Can I come in?" Silence. "Eric?" She took a chance and turned the knob. Upon entering his room she found him sitting up against his headboard, arms crossed, and staring straight ahead. "You can't be that mad if you didn't bother to lock the door."

"I forgot. I guess I'm just stupid like that."

She took a seat on the bed and reached for him. "Hey, don't say-"

He shifted away from her. "Get. Out."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm mad as hell and really don't want to see you right now."

She got up to give him some distance, but wasn't going to leave. Not until they talked about this. "Are you mad at me or Shawn?"

"You. I mean, yeah, I'm pissed at Shawn, but this is all on you."

"You know, technically, Topanga's the one who asked him the question. So she's the one who started it." He simply glared at her. "You said you trusted me."

"Uh-uh, no, don't pull that crap. You left out some fine print when you asked me that question. I didn't know when I said yes that I'd be watching you offer yourself up to your ex-boyfriend."

Angela winced. It sounded so much worse when she imagined it from his point of view. "I'm sorry. I was just trying to prove to Shawn that no matter how much he may have thought he'd want to-"

"I believe I told you to get out."

"But Eric-"

"What if he accepted?"

"What?"

"What if he took you up on your offer? Then what?"

"You don't honestly think that I'd-"

"Five minutes ago I'd say no, but then I saw you lying on my couch and telling Shawn to come get it."

Did she really say it like that? "So you don't trust me?"

"What if our positions were reversed? What if some old girlfriend was trying to get me back and I said what the hell? Let's have one more hook up."

Just the thought of any other girl touching Eric made her skin crawl. "I get it."

"We could even carpool with you and Shawn for a date. Relive some memories and save gas money. Benefits all around, right?"

"Okay! You made your point. I screwed up."

"Yeah," he scoffed, "big time."

Angela decided to take a chance and once again sat on his bed. When he didn't object she slid her hand into his and held it tight. "I made a mistake. I just…I wanted to call him out on his bullshit then and there. He gets away with stuff constantly and I didn't want to let him off the hook this time. He was disrespecting us and our relationship. He shouldn't get to slide on that." She shook her head. Vilifying Shawn's actions didn't justify her behavior. "It seemed like a good idea in my head but I guess I was too impulsive and didn't think it through."

Eric chuckled quietly and rolled his eyes. "I definitely know the feeling. I wrote the book on that."

"I wasn't trying to hurt you. I'm sorry I did."

"I know."

"You forgive me, right?"

"Give me time to get some images out of my mind, okay?"

"That sounds fair." A wave of relief washed over her when he squeezed her hand. "You know it doesn't matter what Shawn thinks, don't you?"

"You reacted the way you did and now you're saying-"

"Hey, I'm not claiming that I had a mature reaction. I just wanted him to answer for his behavior for once in his life. I know I handled it wrong. Either way what he thinks has nothing to do with us. He can want to be with me and want to get me back into bed all he wants, but that doesn't mean it's going to happen. If I wanted to be with him I would be, but I'm not, am I?"

He shook his head. "No."

"That's right." Angela brought her free hand up to his cheek. "I'm with you because I want to be with you. I really like you and being with you. I like the person I am when I'm around you and I like the way you make me feel. I only hope that's mutual for you. Shawn can think whatever he wants. It has nothing to do with you, me, or us. And that's where my focus is, on us. Not him or the past."

"Okay. I get it. And for the record, yes, all that good stuff is mutual for me, too."

She smiled. "Good." She drew him closer for a kiss and frowned when he pulled away. "What-"

"Images in my head…you gotta give me more than a few minutes."

"I'm sorry." She kissed his knuckles instead. "I was stupid."

"If I can't call myself stupid then you can't call yourself stupid either. What you did was stupid, no doubt. It probably ranks up there with some of my best in the stupid hall of fame-"

"Boy, I can feel the love."

"-but you are not stupid."

"Thanks. So what do you want to do now? Should we go back out there?"

"Oh, I don't know."

"Come on, we can hang out in the kitchen and stay away from Shawn, okay? Who knows, maybe Rachel finally got your tater tots in the oven." His stomach growled at the mention of food, making them both laugh. "You can't lie and say you're not hungry."

"Fine, I'll go back out there but if Shawn says anything-"

"If anyone says anything then we come back here. We won't engage. We'll just walk away."

Eric reluctantly stood. "I'm only doing this because I don't want Rachel to think her first dinner party is a disaster. I know how important this is to her."

"You're a good friend."

"Do you think you could get her to spell that out in tater tots?"

/

"I knew it! I knew you resented giving up Yale for me."

"I gave up Yale for us, Cory. There is a big difference."

"Who wants parfaits," Jack asked, trying to break the tension. "Rachel and Angela made them. They've got fruit and some kind of cream and…" He realized no one was listening to him. "…all kinds of good stuff."

"I was just trying to prove a point," Topanga continued. "I wanted you to see that you were wrong."

"If you have to go that far to prove a point then maybe you should've gone to Yale. Maybe time apart would've been good for us."

"What does that mean? Like maybe we wouldn't be engaged right now? God, Cory, why do you have to take everything to the extreme? Rachel, thank you for a lovely evening but I'm leaving." She crouched down to retrieve her purse. When she stood up again she saw Angela and Eric coming back into the room.

"No, wait, you started this whole honesty thing," Cory continued, blocking the door. "You can't leave because things are getting uncomfortable."

"I would honestly rather discuss this with you in private."

"What's wrong, Topanga, can't handle the heat when it's your feet to the fire?"

She turned around and found Angela staring at her, arms crossed. "I don't know, I think I held my own pretty well when you lit the match earlier."

Everything suddenly made sense to her. "That's why you asked Shawn the question. You already knew what his answer would be but you were upset with me for the valedictorian thing."

"I earned the right to be valedictorian. How dare you try to take it away from me?"

"I'm not trying to take anything away from you. I was just curious."

"Topanga, please don't leave just yet," Rachel pleaded. "There's still dessert and…and look, each hat still has one name left."

"Rach, I think it's time for the game to die," Jack whispered.

She pulled a name from the Goofy hat anyway. "Cory! It's finally your turn to ask a question."

"Oh, goody," he fired back sarcastically. He took the baseball cap from Rachel and mimed swirling papers around before making his selection. "Gee, I wonder which one I should pick."

"Knock it off and pick the name."

He jumped, not used to hearing Rachel snap. "Jack."

"Don't ask a question about me," Shawn whispered. "Don't ask a question about me."

"Shawnie, what makes you think I'm asking Jack about you?"

"Because you're about as subtle as a sledgehammer to the skull."

"Well, I wasn't going to ask about you."

"Then what's your question?"

"Uhh…"

"I knew it."

"You know nothing. I've got a great question that has nothing to do with you. Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"What is one thing you've always wanted to say to someone in this room but haven't?"

"Anyone," Jack asked as he scanned the group.

"Anyone…could be your brother…or not your brother…whoever."

"Cory…"

"Anyone in this room," he repeated.

The elder Hunter exhaled. There was only one person that came to mind, but it wasn't going to be easy. He'd tried to have this conversation on a few different occasions but was either interrupted or lost his nerve. He got up and maneuvered around the chairs until he was standing in front of Angela. "Hi."

She smiled awkwardly, unsure of what else to do. "Hi, Jack, what's up?"

"Angela," Cory questioned with a frown. "There's nothing you have to say to your brother?"

"You're the one who said it could be to anybody in this room and I have something I need to say to Angela."

"What is it, Jack?"

All of a sudden he realized this was not something he wanted to say with an audience. "Can we go talk in the hall? Or maybe out to the fire escape?"

"What?"

"Well what I have to say I'd rather say in private, so-"

"Nope, no, if the rest of us got raked over the coals why should you be spared?"

"Because I think there's been enough drama for one night," Jack said in his own defense. "I don't want to add to it. Rachel worked hard to put together this dinner party and I don't want a part in ruining it."

"Thanks, honey, but I think that ship has sailed. Not because of you," she added, "but the rest of these people…well, I'm already writing this off as a disaster."

"It's okay, Jack," Angela said. "You can say whatever you need to say right here."

He rubbed the back of his head and shifted his weight back and forth between his feet. This was a bad idea. He knew it was. But everyone was telling him otherwise. "I'm sorry."

"Again with this? Look, I swear to you, whatever offense you think you committed couldn't have been that big a deal because I don't remember it. Whatever it was, consider yourself forgiven. Really, it's okay."

"It's not okay with me. I should've done something even if it was my brother. Instead I let you get hurt. Then I didn't even make sure you were okay before you left."

"What are you talking about?" She was starting to wonder if maybe he had a dream and imagined a scenario where he slighted her. It was the only thing that made sense. They never spent enough time together for him to-

"I'm sorry I didn't help you when Shawn got drunk and shoved you into the door." He got it all out in one breath, figuring if he didn't pause he couldn't chicken out. "I should've intervened but I didn't. I was in shock, frozen in place like a statue."

"Oh."

"I'm really sorry, Angela. I hope you can forgive me."


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're almost done with the dinner party/honesty stuff. Promise. It spread out across more chapters than I realized, but we will be moving on soon. And I hope people are enjoying the story. To say Angela and Eric are an unlikely pairing is quite the understatement, I know. But sometimes it's fun to explore the unlikely. :-)

_"I'm really sorry, Angela. I hope you can forgive me."_

She was staring at him, eyes wide. It was clear this wasn't what she expected to come out of his mouth. "I've always wanted to say something and apologize," Jack continued, "but there never seemed to be a good time."

"But right now in front of everyone was the perfect moment," Shawn exclaimed. "Are you freaking kidding me?"

Eric wrapped his arm around Angela, who was extremely tense. She didn't respond to him, however, her focus on Jack. "When the hell was this," he asked. "I don't remember it."

"You weren't here. It's ironic because even though you and Angela weren't together then I'm sure you would've done something. Even when you act like a doofus you're always the most human among us."

"Jack," Cory broke in, "are you sure this is the right place to talk about-"

"You didn't do anything either."

"What?"

"You stood next to me and watched it happen. Neither one of us did anything to help. Topanga went after her, but came back a couple minutes later."

Topanga stared at her hands which were folded in front of her. She had gone after Angela and, after checking that she was okay, made sure she knew that this wasn't Shawn. It was the alcohol. That wasn't the guy she had known since the playground. Topanga spent more time trying to convince her of Shawn's true character than assessing her well-being. It's no wonder she insisted on getting herself home after that. What was it Angela said not too long ago? _'What Shawn wants, what he thinks, what he feels…that's what matters around here.'_ Did it start all the way back then? Had it always been that way?

"I apologized," Shawn said in a defensive tone. "I went to that counselor like we all thought I should, and I haven't had a drink since." He didn't like to think about that day, about how he hurt someone he cared so deeply for. It happened all too easily: a few too many beers, a disagreement, a flash of anger that made him see red, and before the rational part of his brain caught up with the rest of him the sickening thud of Angela hitting the door rang in his ears. The fear in her eyes in the immediate aftermath still haunted him. So did the way she recoiled when he took half a step forward to apologize and then fled the apartment before he could get the words out. It was painful to think about. So he didn't. He buried it deep down with everything else that haunted him. "Angela forgave me. This is in the past. Why do you have to drag it up now?"

"Yeah, I'm with Shawn," Cory agreed, though nowhere near as enthusiastic as he otherwise would be. Was Jack right? He tried to replay the scene in his mind, but found he had blocked most of it out. Did he really just stand there? "It's in the past. Angela forgave him. Right, Angela?"

All eyes were on her and Angela had never been more tempted to run in her life. The only things keeping her from fleeing were the security of Eric's arms around her and the fact that the door was on the complete opposite side of the apartment. She'd have to make it past everyone to leave. She spotted the window out of the corner of her eye. Going out the fire escape had only been a joke earlier, though it certainly held appeal now. Just as her brain was fumbling to come up with some sort of answer that would stop all of the stares, the oven timer dinged. She jumped up and went to the kitchen. "I'll get it."

"Oh, that's okay," Rachel said. "I can-"

"No, I got it." She grabbed a pot holder and opened the oven.

"Really, it's not a big deal."

"Rachel, it's fine, I-ow!" She dropped the pan onto the stovetop, scattering tater tots everywhere. "Damn it."

"Did you burn yourself?"

"No, Cory, one of the tater tots tried to fight back and bit me," she fired back sarcastically. "What do you think, Sherlock?" Angela went over to the sink and stuck her hand under the cool water.

"It was just a question," he mumbled.

Eric went to the kitchen and came up behind Angela. "You okay," he asked, putting his hand on the small of her back.

"I'm afraid your tater tots have seen better days."

"I don't care about them. You on the other hand…"

She relaxed against him. "It's nothing."

He shut off the water and carefully dried her hand with a paper towel. "Come on, we have a first aid kit in the bathroom."

"You don't have to-"

There were a million questions he wanted to ask her about what just happened, but he wasn't going to do it with an audience present. "Just shut up and let me take care of you, okay?" He took her uninjured hand and led her up the stairs.

"Wow, with that stellar bedside manner how can I refuse?"

"You can't."

The remaining members of the dinner party stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually Rachel spoke up. "God, this party sucks. I'm never doing this again."

"Don't say that, Rach. Next time we just won't invite these people."

"Oh, please, Jack," Cory scoffed, "you put the final knife in the heart of this disaster."

"You harpooned it with your question!"

"You all can go now." Rachel collapsed into a chair in defeat. "Thank you for coming. I'll never forget this night."

"Rachel, don't-"

"Please take a parfait on your way out. Angela and I worked hard on dessert and I'd hate to have them go to waste."

The guests took their desserts and quickly left the apartment. "So be honest," Jack began as he locked the door, "how much did I screw up by trying to apologize to Angela in front of everyone?"

"Do you mean in terms of our dinner party or in general?"

"In general."

"Oh, hon, it was so bad. What were you thinking? Did you see the look on her face? You completely caught her off guard. And trying to apologize in front of Shawn…why? How was that supposed to help?"

"I don't know. Cory asked me the question and Angela was the only person I could think about. And I figured at least this way I could finally apologize without chickening out." He sat on the couch and put his head in his hands. "I'm so stupid!"

"Jack, no, you're not stupid. Your heart was in the right place…mostly. You just didn't think it through. Come on," she said, kissing his cheek. "We didn't get a chance to eat yet."

"I don't deserve food."

"Maybe not, but you'll need it to give you energy in order to clean up this mess."

He looked around the apartment. "Are you speaking metaphorically or literally right now?"

"Let's focus on the literal mess first. You can worry about the rest of it tomorrow."

/

"What are you doing now," Angela asked Eric as she watched him move around the small bathroom. He had sat her down on the closed toilet and wouldn't let her move.

"After cool water and burn cream comes the bandage," he explained. "Haven't you ever burned yourself before?"

"Yeah. I ran it under cold water and got on with my life. I'm fine with a regular Band-Aid. You don't need all that gauze."

"You can't use a Band-Aid. What if the sticky part gets on the burn? Besides, it's on the side of your hand by your thumb. A Band-Aid won't stay."

"Okay, but I don't think we need three miles of gauze."

"What happened to shutting up and letting me take care of you?"

"Why are you making a federal case out of this? I mean really, I've had worse paper cuts."

"Hold out your hand." She did what he asked and he slowly wrapped her extremity in the gauze. "I want to take care of you. Isn't that enough? I'm sorry I wasn't here before but I'm here now."

"What do you mean you weren't…this is about Shawn and what Jack said? Is that it?"

"No, I-"

"I don't want your pity or misplaced guilt."

"It's not pity."

"Weren't you angry at me anyway?"

"What?"

"Shawn said he'd bed me with no strings attached, I stupidly called his bluff, and you stormed off. Shouldn't you still be mad?"

"That doesn't seem important right now."

She shook her head. "No, don't do that. I'm not some victim who needs to be treated like a delicate flower. I got through it. I survived. If you're mad at me, be mad. I can take it."

"I can be upset and still care about you at the same time. It's not an either/or situation."

Angela was used to guys running hot and cold. It was all or nothing. They loved her or didn't want her around. There was no in between. She just assumed all her relationships would be that way. She knew Eric was different, but it never occurred to her that this part would be different, too.

He cut the gauze before securing it with a clip. "There you go. Just don't get that wet."

"Thanks. This is pretty good. Were you a nurse in a previous life?"

"Making all that coffee in the Student Union has caused some burns. Plus all of the stupid stunts I've pulled didn't come without dumb injuries. I can ice and wrap a sprained ankle in record time."

"Impressive."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"What's to talk about? You saw it. I wasn't paying attention to the pan I was taking out of the oven."

"You know what I'm talking about- Shawn? Jack's apology? I saw the look on your face. I know how tense you got."

"He caught me off guard." She squeezed past him and vacated the bathroom. "I'm allowed to be surprised, right?"

"Angela, come on." He followed her down the hall and to his room. "I just want to understand."

"There's nothing to understand. Shawn was drunk, hadn't been to school in a few days, and Jack and Cory decided to stage some poorly thought out intervention."

"I'm guessing Shawn didn't react well?"

"A group of people ganging up on him-no, that would've pissed him off sober. I could tell he was getting agitated so I thought I'd have better luck if it was just the two of us. I tried to get him to take a walk with me but he didn't want to go. He insisted he was fine and couldn't understand why people were worried about him." She went to the closet and took out one of Eric's shirts at random and held it close. "I tried again to get him to come with me. He told me not to touch him," she said quietly. "He said to leave him alone. But I didn't. I just had to reach for his arm."

"Please don't tell me you blame yourself."

"Most of the time no, but every once in a while I wonder what I could've done differently. It didn't even seem real, you know," she continued. "Everything happened so fast and Shawn didn't even look like himself. His eyes were cold…there was nothing there but anger. That's what scared me more than anything. It was like something else had taken over and it wasn't even him. I didn't know what he was going to do next. I didn't bother sticking around to find out. The minute I was able to think I told him to stop drinking and then I ran."

"And no one did anything?"

"It happened so fast. They were as surprised as I was."

"That's a no?"

"Topanga followed me into the hall and made sure I was okay. She kept repeating over and over again that that wasn't the Shawn she'd known since childhood. I think she thought if she said it enough it would erase what he did. I didn't want to hear about the Shawn she knew so I said I wanted to be alone and walked home."

"By yourself?"

"That's what alone means, so yeah."

"Were you okay physically?"

"I had a couple small bruises, nothing that didn't heal within a week or two. People have survived much worse."

"Just because someone else had it worse that doesn't take away what happened to you. Wrong is wrong."

"I know."

"I wish I'd been here to help you when it happened. I'm sorry I wasn't."

"It's not your fault."

"I'm still sorry."

Angela didn't fight it when he pulled her into a hug. She sank against him and rested her cheek against his chest. The way his hands gently moved across her back seemed as if they were trying to avoid the bruises that were no longer there. True, she wasn't helpless and didn't need anyone's pity, but it was nice to have someone who wanted to take care of her. Tonight was the first time there was any regret expressed over what happened during the failed intervention. Apparently it had been eating away at Jack for a while, but no one said anything to her. Even when Shawn apologized later, he was focused mostly on himself and his intention to maintain his sobriety instead of what he did to her. She let him get away with it, too. Why did she do that? Eric, on the other hand, kept apologizing because he wasn't there when it happened. She didn't know what to do with that.

"What do you want to do now?" She jumped in his arms. Neither of them had spoken in a couple minutes. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

"That's okay. We should probably eat something. Though I did just drop your tater tots," she said, wincing. "Sorry about that. I'll replace the bag."

"Don't worry about it. But I meant what do you want to do about tonight and what Jack said."

"I'll talk to Jack tomorrow, but nothing else is changing."

"How can you say that?"

"It's the same as when I told you about my mother. Maybe you just found out but it's old news for me. I have no desire to drag it all out again. It's in the past and I'd appreciate it if you kept it there."

"But Angela-"

"No. Can you please just drop it? Talking won't change anything."

"But if you want to talk-"

"-then I know where to find you," she finished, reminding him of what he said earlier during the honesty game. "Okay?"

He nodded. "All right, I don't like it, but fine."

Angela leaned up and kissed him before pulling away. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. I guess I'll go see if I can find some food for us."

"Okay." She took a seat on his bed, hesitant to ask her next question. "Can I ask a favor," she called out, just as he was about to open the door.

"Sure."

"Would you mind if I spent the night?"

"Here?"

"You know, to sleep. It's just…I don't feel like dealing with Topanga, Cory and Shawn tonight." It was taking him a little too long to answer. "I can sleep on the couch if it's a problem."

"No, it's fine. I was going to ask if you wanted me to take the couch."

"I'd like to think we're mature enough to handle sleeping in the same bed even if nothing else is going to happen tonight. As tempting as that other stuff is I'm too exhausted and we still haven't had the sex conversation."

"Angela, it's okay. I'm an adult. I can handle it. How about I get that food now," he asked, pointing towards the door.

She flashed him a grateful smile. "Sounds good, thanks."

/

/

Cory and Topanga spent the drive back to school in awkward silence. He tried to pick up their argument from earlier in the evening, but Topanga wasn't engaging. Before he knew it they were standing in the hallway between their respective dorms.

"Goodnight, Cory."

"Wait, that's it?"

"That's all I have to say to you right now."

"No offense, Topanga, but tough."

She crossed her arms and her eyes narrowed as she stared him down. "Tough?"

"I don't think letting our discussion simmer will help, do you?"

"Based on what you said I thought you wanted to spend some time apart from me…like four years."

"Come on, Topanga, are you serious? That's not what I meant and you know it."

"You said some things tonight that made me really angry."

"Ditto. So doesn't it make sense to talk it out now before you resent me even more than you already do?"

"I don't…ugh! Did you listen to anything I said tonight?"

"Yeah, that's why I think we need to talk."

She opened the door to her dorm and walked inside before throwing her purse down and taking a seat on her bed. "Well, are you going to speak or not," she questioned when he didn't start talking.

"Can I have a chance to close the door and sit?"

"Fine."

Cory pulled out one of the desk chairs and turned it around so he was facing her. "I guess my main question is do you resent giving up Yale for me?"

"For the last time I didn't give up Yale for you. I did it for us."

"You see, it's your wording that confuses me. You forever go on about doing it for us, but you never flat out say that you don't resent me for it."

"What do you want from me, Cory?"

"I want the truth. Good or bad I think you owe me that much."

"I don't resent you, but I can't lie, there's a part of me that wonders where I'd be right now if I'd gone to Yale. It's one of the best schools in the world and I was accepted. How many people can say that? It's nothing to do with you or us and everything to do with me as my own person. I know we forget a lot of the time but we still are separate people."

"If Yale meant that much to you why turn them down? I saw your face when you found out you got in."

"Academically speaking, I'm going to be fine wherever I go. I always have been."

"You're definitely the smartest person I know."

"But there was one thing Yale didn't have."

"Mr. Feeny?"

She chuckled quietly. "Okay, fine, two things. But the main one was you."

"You know I would've been willing to do the long distance thing."

"I know, but four years? Especially in college those are important years. People grow and change and I was afraid of what would happen if I left. What if we grew apart instead of together?"

He moved to sit beside her on the bed and wrapped his arm around her. "That wouldn't happen to us, Topanga."

"You don't know that. The very thought of it terrified me. What if part of the reason I'm as successful as I am is because of you, because I have your love and support and constantly cheering me on."

"You're a success because you're you. I'm just the guy lucky enough to have a front row seat and bask in your glory."

She smiled at him before pulling him close for a slow kiss. "At the end of the day we were more important than anything I could learn at Yale. I chose us. I'm sorry if I didn't make it that clear to you before."

"I'm sure you did. Maybe I wasn't listening. But thanks for saying it now."

They sat in companionable silence for a couple of minutes before Topanga spoke up. "Cory?"

"Yes, darling?"

"Can we talk about what was bothering me earlier?"

"We didn't just cover that?"

"No."

He took a deep breath. "I'm almost afraid to ask, but what was bothering you?"

"If we're about to get married why are you so hesitant to share stuff like razors with me? I want to share every aspect of our lives. What's mine is yours' and what's yours' is mine."

"That's getting pretty up close and personal, Topanga."

"Exactly. You had a meltdown over a razor. What are you going to do when I use your toothbrush?" She rolled her eyes when he made a gagging noise. "Very mature."

"But it's my toothbrush! And you…just…yucky!"

"Yucky? You just kissed me and had your tongue in my mouth. That's not getting up close and personal?"

"I'm not going on a search for plaque!"

"It's no different."

"Maybe not, but like I said, it's personal…especially coming from someone who freaks if my hands accidentally wander from the approved zones when we're making out."

"So what, you're not going to share with me until after we have sex?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying." Cory got up and moved to Angela's side of the room. "It's just weird that you want to share all of my intimate, personal objects but you have such strict rules on when I get to be intimate with you. It's a double standard. Like it's okay to share our lives so long as you say it is. I have no say; you're using my razor whether I like it or not. You're calling the shots and I'm just along for the ride."

Topanga was quiet, considering everything he'd said. "You're right."

"I am?"

"Yes, I've had all the power and I haven't given an inch. So what do you want?"

"Excuse me?"

"I want you to feel more comfortable with me using your razor or toothbrush. What can I do to help you get there?"

This had to be a trick. There's no way she'd be giving him a free pass. "Can I ask you one more question first?"

"Sure."

"And you promise to answer it honestly and not get mad?"

"That is the theme of the evening."

"The evening's been a gigantic disaster, so pardon me for not wanting to follow the theme."

"Fair enough. What's your question?"

"You remember prom night last year?"

"Of course. What about it?"

"Well we had decided that prom would be when we…you know…"

"Had sex?"

"Yeah. And I know why we didn't that night, because my parents are freaks and chose to go to the one hotel where they knew our prom was being held! Like there are no other hotels in Philadelphia? Seriously?"

She reached for his hands. "Cory, focus."

"Right. Sorry. Like I was saying, I know why we were delayed that night, but it seemed like you went from saying it would happen when the time was right to it's not happening until we get married. If you changed your mind, fine, but you never explained what changed. You know I'll wait for you, but I'd like to know why you suddenly moved the goalpost."

"It was your parents."

"If I can get over seeing my mom in that nightgown then I think you can-"

"No, not that. They had a baby."

He started to laugh. He couldn't help it. It was one of the dumbest things she's ever said. "Well of course they had a baby, silly. That's how they got to be mom and dad in the first place."

"No, what I mean is your parents, at their age and vast life experience, had a birth control oops and got pregnant. If it could happen to them just imagine how easily it could happen to two inexperienced morons like us."

"First you'd have to let me touch something. Otherwise you getting pregnant at this stage would get us a write up in a holy book."

"Cory!"

He took her hand and led her back to sit on her bed. "I get it. Why didn't you just explain that to me?"

"It's kind of difficult to do in between the constant jokes about us dying virgins."

"Maybe I wouldn't have made the jokes if you'd told me your reasons for wanting to wait. Or I wouldn't have made as many of them. I think I've proven myself to be a pretty understanding guy."

"Okay," she said through a drawn out sigh, "I suppose the one thing we can learn from this honesty day from hell is that we aren't as good at communicating as we thought we were."

"Agreed. We need to keep working on that. I promise I'll keep trying and not in an annoying way like I was about your hair tonight. Sorry about that. Well, not sorry for what I said because your hair? Hideous. But-"

"Cory-"

"-but I shouldn't have been obnoxious about it."

"That's okay. I brought it on myself. All right." She clapped her hands together. "Have you decided what you want?"

"What?"

"What's going to make you feel better about the razor? What level of intimacy is it going to take?"

He thought back to the shower this morning. "Truthfully, I'm never going to be comfortable sharing any of my personal items with someone who won't even show me her butt."

"That's it?"

"Yep. You want my toothbrush? No tushie, no brushie."

Topanga mulled it over for a few seconds before saying, "I think that's fair."

"Wait…what?"


	20. Chapter 20

"Which side of the bed do you sleep on," Angela asked Eric after he returned to his room after brushing his teeth. He shrugged in response. "You don't know?"

"I kind of just fall and sleep where I land. I don't pay attention. What about you?"

"I've only ever had a twin mattress. Anything bigger would've been a hassle in all the military moves."

"You can have dibs. It doesn't matter to me. I can sleep anywhere."

"Oh, trust me," she said with a chuckle, "I know."

"What does that mean?"

"We've taken a road trip. I've seen you sleep in weird positions and through the worst storms I've ever witnessed. When we stayed with my dad he'd run the blender or drop crumbs on the carpet to run the vacuum just to see how long it would take you to wake up, he was so amazed. I've never seen anything like it either really."

"You're just jealous of my siesta skills." He stuck out his tongue at her. "I told you, I've been studied. I beat the poor little mouse and everything. The doctor was impressed."

She rolled her eyes but was unable to keep the smile off of her face. "Whatever. Your alarm clock is on the right and I don't want you reaching over me to turn it off or hit snooze so maybe I'll take the left side."

"That's probably a good idea. I do like the snooze button. But I don't have to be at the Student Union until eleven so it won't be going off super early. We can sleep in."

"Sleeping in is always good," she agreed, climbing into bed and getting under the blanket. "I haven't done that in a while." She shifted around and attempted to get comfortable, trying to be conscious of the amount of room she left for Eric. "I already know you talk in your sleep sometimes and you don't really snore. Is there anything else I need to know?"

"Like what?"

"Are you a blanket hog, sleep walker, cuddly sleeper?"

He switched on the lamp before turning off the overhead light and getting into bed. "I don't sleep walk, not sure about the rest."

"No one's ever said anything to you?"

"To be completely honest I've never spent the whole night with anyone before. I shared a room with Cory until I was nineteen but I don't think he counts."

"What does that mean," she asked. "Have you never…are you a virgin?"

He twisted around to face her. "What?! No! Of course not."

"It was just a question. It wouldn't have been a bad thing. I was going to say you sure fooled me if you were."

"Fooled how?"

"When we're making out you're…you know what you're doing. You're confident."

"You're welcome," he bragged, laughing when she did. "There haven't been a lot of girls, but there have been a few."

"Then how have you never spent the night with anyone?"

"Because someone always had an early class, a roommate who would be worried or coming home soon, or my favorite, 'Quick, Eric, you have to go. I hear my parents pulling into the garage!' That one's a real mood killer. I got pushed out a girl's window once. It's not as fun as it looks on TV. I'm lucky it was only a ten foot drop. You see this scar?" He held out his arm. "That's from the thorny bush that broke my fall."

"I suppose I've never spent the entire night with a guy either. There's only been a couple, but I was living with my grandmother at the time and if I missed curfew or if she caught a guy in my room I would've been dead. So this is sort of a first for the both of us."

"I kind of like that we have a first we can share."

She snuggled closer to Eric and rested her head on his chest. "Me, too."

"So you're not sure if you're a blanket hog or cuddly sleeper either?"

"I'm afraid not."

"I guess it keeps things interesting."

"Thank you again for letting me stay here," she spoke through a yawn.

"You don't have to thank me." He turned off the lamp. She was fading and he was pretty tired, too. This definitely wasn't how he imagined they would spend their first night in the same bed.

"Still…I appreciate it. Especially after the roller coaster this dinner from hell was."

"You just let me know if you want backup tomorrow when you talk to Jack."

"I can handle him. We need to talk. He's been trying to apologize to me for a while. I never knew what for because we always got interrupted. Trust me. I'm good with Jack."

"And the others?"

"That's part of the whole, 'it's in the past and I don't want to drag it up again,' thing, remember?" She moved away from him and lay back against the pillow. "As far as I'm concerned there's nothing to talk about."

"But Angela-"

"Can't we just go to sleep? Something tells me this will still be hanging over our heads to talk about tomorrow, because you're annoying and persistent like that. It must be genetic because Cory's that way, too. He can never let anything go. Remind me to yell at your parents later."

"Hey! That's a low blow. And don't mention Cory or my parents when we're in bed, even just going to sleep- total mood killer. I'll have nightmares."

"By the way, did I tell you my dad called earlier?"

Eric's heart quickened just thinking about the torture her dad would inflict upon him if he knew he was in bed with his daughter right now. Angela's teasing smirk was evident through the fractured glow of the street lights that filtered in through the blinds. And even though her joke caused momentary panic, all he could think about was how beautiful she looked lying there and how happy he was that she wasn't leaving tonight. If he was honest with himself he'd admit that part of the reason he was glad to have her here was because he no longer trusted Cory, Topanga, and especially Shawn. How could they treat their friend…girlfriend…so poorly? How did Angela forgive them so easily? He didn't get it.

After an extended silence she rolled to her side and found Eric staring at her, a faraway expression on his face. "Hey," she said softly as she reached out and ran her hand along his jaw. "Don't worry. My dad would have to go through me to get to you. And I rather like you all in one piece."

He took her hand and held it against his cheek, pressing a kiss to the inside of her wrist. "It's not that. I like having you here. That's all." It was the truth. He just wouldn't mention the part about being suspicious of the others. "I just…I really like it. I'm glad you stayed tonight."

Angela found herself at a loss for words. She could see Eric meant what he said. He was happy simply to be with her…for her. It didn't seem to matter that this evening had been crappy and included an argument. When the dust settled nothing had been a deal breaking moment. No one was looking to bail at the first sign of a challenge. He still wanted her here and this was where she wanted to be. "So am I."

/

/

"I have seen the promised land," Cory declared as he entered his dorm.

Shawn glanced up from his reading, curious about his friend's arms thrown into the air- a move saved for sporting events- and the grin on his face. Nothing that happened tonight was worth celebrating. "What are you talking about?"

"Topanga showed me her butt. She asked me what it would take to share my stuff with her. I said show me your butt. She did. It was glorious."

"Congratulations."

"That's all you're going to say? This is huge, Shawnie!"

"And I'm very happy for you. Really. I'm doing cartwheels inside." He plastered a smile onto his face. "See?"

"Ugh, not the phony, serial killer smile. We've talked about that. If you don't feel it, it's just creepy."

"Well, sorry. I got the ass end of things tonight, too, only not in the good way."

"What does that mean?"

He shook his head. "Never mind."

"I'm guessing things didn't go well with Shawna?"

"You'd be surprised at how big of a turn off it is to find out someone is still hung up on their ex and not only has a problem with alcohol, but gets angry and violent when he drinks. Shawna gave me the whole crap speech about not wanting a serious relationship right now but we can still get to know each other as friends. I gave that speech so many times to so many girls in high school I can recite it by memory."

"Sorry. Do you want me to talk to her for you? You haven't had a drink in over a year. I'll just tell her you're going through a rough patch."

"Rough patch…is that what we're calling my life now?" He sighed and stared straight ahead. "What the hell's the matter with me?"

"Nothing, Shawnie, absolutely nothing."

"Really? I broke up with Angela at freshman orientation even though I still loved her. Hell, I practically gave her the same speech about not wanting a serious relationship and wanting to be friends. Only I added in not wanting to miss out on getting to know new people by being tied down to one person. I had the chance to get back together with her at Christmas. We said we still loved each other. She was willing to forgive me and give us another chance but I just…" He shook his head. "…I couldn't."

"Why not?"

"Now she's with your brother and I'd give anything for it to be Christmas again so I won't be an idiot and make her cry."

"She cried?"

"I kissed her, told her I still loved her, and bailed out on getting back together at the very last minute. How do you think she took it?"

"I'd say you're lucky you can still walk."

"There was a janitor cleaning up. She's smart enough not to do it in front of a potential witness."

"Yeah well I hate to say I told you so, but-"

"Bull. You love to say it."

"Not to you. Can I ask you about something Angela said tonight?"

"I guess."

"When Topanga asked you her question…you know…about who you'd have sex with if there were no strings attached…"

"I remember."

"When Angela was talking what did she mean when she laid on the couch and asked if you remembered how this part works?"

He got up and retrieved his toiletry bag before heading for the door. "I think I'm going to brush my teeth and try that exfoliator Topanga got me before I go to bed."

"Shawn, wait."

"It was a long night. I'm tired. And according to your fiancée I have problematic pores."

"Angela was making it sound like you guys had sex already. But you would've told me that, right? We always promised we'd tell each other this stuff."

"Can't you just leave it alone? Not everything in my life is your business."

"So you did have sex with her?"

Shawn sighed and tossed his bag on his bed, choosing instead to lean against the wall. "It happened right after she got home from spending the summer with her dad. It was the night we doubled with you and Topanga and got burgers and went to the arcade. You finally beat the high score on NBA Jam."

"Oh, yeah! Man, that was an awesome night."

"I walked her home, her grandmother was out, and we talked about how much we'd missed each other. One thing led to another and…" He'd wanted to do it on prom night, but she wouldn't even consider it until they could talk about sex like mature adults. He didn't know how they could talk about something they weren't doing. Then they spent nearly two months apart and by the time she got back he was willing to do a little more talking and conversation suddenly didn't seem as important to her. All they knew was they loved each other and had an entire summer to make up for.

"And what?"

"You know and what. Don't play dumb."

"Shawn! Details!"

"No."

"Wait a minute. You said it happened right after she got back from her dad? Wasn't that just a couple weeks before school started?"

"Yeah, so?"

"So you slept with her and then dumped her? Am I hearing this right? Please tell me I'm misunderstanding you. Damn it, Shawn, I knew you played the field and had fun in high school, but I thought things changed with Angela. She was the one."

"She was! She is. She…she's everything."

"Then explain to me how you go from doing that to breaking up with her because you don't want to miss out on meeting new people."

Shawn took a seat at the foot of his bed, arms crossed and eyes glued to the floor. "I know I talked a good game in high school but I never…Angela was the first…I-"

"How is that possible? I heard all the talk. Hell, half of it came from you."

"I'm not saying I didn't do a lot of things with a lot of different girls, but I never took that last step, seal the deal, cross the finish line, pass go and collect-"

"Okay, I don't need all the lame euphemisms. I just don't get it, Shawnie. If Angela was special enough for you to cross the finish line how did you need new people? You had her!"

"It was too much. It was so intense…all the feelings. It scared me. It was like I was at the top of the mountain and things were never going to be any better than they were right then. I've never felt for anyone else what I feel for Angela and that moment was just so perfect. She was perfect."

When he didn't continue Cory spoke up. "I'm going to need more. Usually perfection doesn't lead to a break up."

"How much longer could it have lasted? Let's face it. I don't get to have perfect. Sooner or later something was going to come along and screw it up and it was going to hurt like hell. Either I'd mess it up or get scared and run away or she'd realize she deserved so much better than a bum like me. And I know I wouldn't have been able to handle it if it was her."

"So you dumped her before this imaginary fear of her breaking up with you could come true?"

He shook his head. "You don't get to judge me. You're a freak who's been handed the perfect life on a silver platter. It seemed like a good idea to end things before we hated each other, this way we could still be friends and be in each other's lives. Besides, I thought the breakup was mutual. She agreed with everything I said."

"That's called saving face, Shawnie. She didn't want you to see how much it was killing her because she didn't want to get in the way of you finding yourself or whatever crap you told her about needing new people in your life."

"I already know I blew it! You don't have to rub in my face how much I hurt her." He put his head in his hands and groaned. "I'm an idiot."

"You just have a lot of room for improvement, a real work in progress, a phoenix that must rise from the ashes…over and over again."

A bitter laugh escaped him. "That's a nice way of calling me a disaster."

"No, you're-"

"Those ashes I'd have to rise from are my life."

"I didn't mean it like that."

"I'm going to bed."

"But, Shawn-"

"Goodnight."

He sighed, deciding to relent for the night. Shawn wasn't going to share any more. "Fine."

"And I'm sorry I ruined the night you saw Topanga's butt with my misery."

"Don't be ridiculous. Nothing could ruin that."

/

/

His left shoulder was asleep. That was Eric's first conscious thought upon waking up Sunday morning. That was quickly replaced with the realization of why: Angela. Apparently she was the cuddly sleeper. Between the two of them he would've put money on it being him. At some point she'd migrated the small distance to his side and he wondered how long they'd been sleeping in a virtual tangle of limbs. Her head was tucked under his chin and her breath tickled his neck every time she exhaled. It was when he tried to shift around to relieve the pins and needles sensation in his shoulder without waking her that he realized exactly where their hands were. One of his was resting on her butt and the other was cradling the side of her breast. Neither region was new for him, but they had both been awake and actively participating in each previous encounter. Angela, however, currently had him struggling to breathe. Her hand was dangerously low on his hip. If she moved even a little bit she'd be touching his-

"Mmm…morning," she murmured, raising her head slightly to kiss the side of his neck. "That's the best I've slept in a long time."

"Me, too. How's your hand?"

"It's a little sore but I'll live." She almost immediately noticed their positions and chuckled quietly. "So we're really feeling each other up, huh?"

"Yeah…sorry." Eric moved both of his hands to her back.

"I wasn't complaining. I think it's funny. Copping a feel in our sleep? Come on- hilarious." She smiled at him. "Even our subconscious minds want each other."

"I don't think our minds are doing the groping."

"Touché."

"Too early for fancy words."

"Sorry. Is something wrong?"

"No, why?"

"You keep making a face and you're squirming."

"You've been on my shoulder all night. It's asleep."

"Oh." She moved so she was no longer lying on his joint. "Sorry. Why didn't you say anything?"

"I don't know. You seemed comfortable."

"Next time say something or at least shove me over. What's the point of sharing a bed if one of us isn't happy?"

"I'm happy!"

"Yeah, at least until your arm falls off."

"Hey, a lot of people get by just fine with one arm. Look at the one-armed man in _The Fugitive_."

"Wasn't he a killer?"

"Yep and he didn't let the fact that he only had one arm stop him."

She burst out laughing. "How does your brain even get there?"

"Get where?"

"From your arm being asleep to the one-armed man in _The Fugitive_? Like…how does that happen? It's so crazy."

He frowned. Crazy wasn't usually a compliment directed towards him. "Good crazy or-or get the butterfly net crazy?"

"Good crazy. I've told you I love the way you think. It's so…not linear."

"Huh? Again, it's too early for fancy words."

"You're so creative. I love that. You don't think like most people."

"Who wants to be like most people? They're boring."

"I agree." She wrapped her arms around her pillow and closed her eyes. "How long do we have before you have to be at the Student Union?"

He glanced at the clock. "My alarm isn't going to go off for another hour."

"Then why are we awake now?"

"I don't know…the groping?"

Angela laughed quietly. "Right. So did you want to go back to sleep…or back to groping…a little of both?"

"Seriously?"

"I figure do something we both enjoy before we leave this room and start our days."

"You are the best girlfriend ever!"

She moved to lay her back and stared at him with a smile on her face. "Then what the hell are you still doing on that side of the bed?"

"Good point."

/

/

"Ooh, French Toast," Rachel exclaimed, dashing down the stairs. She took a plate and moved to get some food only to have Jack slap her hand away. "Hey!"

"Those aren't for you."

"Excuse me? That is your apology French Toast with the fancy bread."

"What are you talking about?"

"Whenever you screw up or feel bad about something the next day you always make French toast, special French Toast."

"I do not," he scoffed.

"You got up early this morning and went to the store, didn't you?"

"Yeah, so? We needed things."

She strolled around the kitchen, noting the items that weren't there yesterday. "I see. Brioche, strawberries, whipped cream, real maple syrup, chocolate chips, bananas-"

"I don't know how Angela likes her French toast."

"And why are you making this feast for her?"

"Because I feel bad about what happened last…" He trailed off realizing his girlfriend was right. "Crap, I do have an apology meal."

"That's okay, hon," she reassured him with a grin. "It's not the worst thing in the world."

"I've done this before?"

"Whenever you screw up; remember right after I moved in and you accidentally threw away the notes for my psych project?"

"Remember? My ears are still ringing from the way you screeched at me."

She decided to ignore him and keep talking. "That was the first time you made me French toast. And what about the time Eric's favorite shirt got mixed up with your laundry and you spilled bleach on it in the laundry room?"

"That was bad. He almost cried."

"You made him French toast."

"Okay, I get it."

"And I thought the breakfast was your way of making me feel better about the disaster of a dinner party last night."

"But you said that wasn't my fault."

"Yeah, but after sleeping on it I realized you did contribute to it going down in flames at the end. It could've just been a bad party. You took it to another level."

Jack slumped down in his seat. "I already said I'm sorry, okay!"

"I know and I'll forgive you, but I'm just saying some breakfast would speed the process along." He shoved the plate across the counter. She clapped her hands and cheered. "Thanks, honey."

"Whatever," he muttered seconds before his head popped up. "Crap, Eric's going to want food, too."

"Probably, but I don't think you need to worry about them yet."

"They'll be awake soon. He's got to work at eleven."

"I didn't say they were sleeping. In fact, judging by some of the noises I heard when I passed his room I'm guessing they aren't."

"Oh, gross."

"Give him a break. He's put up with us for months. He deserves his own happiness and Angela makes him happy."

"I agree, but that doesn't mean I want to hear it."

"Please. Like you expect me to believe that you and Eric never talk about girls and sex?"

"Sure we do…or we did. That changed when you moved in and we thought we both liked you and made that stupid bet. Things got awkward after that." He winced when he realized he mentioned the bet. "Sorry again about that."

"It's okay, I'm over it. On the plus side you and Eric can gossip again."

"Yay," Jack said sarcastically before he got his keys and headed for the door. "I'll be right back."

"Where are you going?"

"I need more brioche if I'm feeding all three of you."

Rachel only shook her head and laughed as she watched him go. A few minutes later Angela came down the stairs, looking disheveled, in one of Eric's t-shirts. The shirt was not only on backwards, but inside out as well. "Morning."

"Hi."

"How's your hand?"

Angela held it up and shook her head. "I'm fine. Eric went overboard with all the gauze."

"Where is Eric? I thought he worked today."

"He does, but right now? Cold shower," she admitted with a sheepish expression on her face. "Very cold shower."

Rachel couldn't hide her surprise. "Oh, I guess I assumed you were already…I mean-you two have been going out for a little while. And with the noise coming from the bedroom-"

"You heard us?"

"You guys weren't that loud. I just happened to be walking down the hall and have to pass Eric's door to get out here." She laughed at Angela when she buried her face in her hands. "Hey, it's better to be heard having a good time than a bad one." She smirked and nudged her with an elbow. "At least I'm guessing it was a good time."

"Honestly, I'm not sure how much longer I can hold out. You know how sweet, kind, and generous Eric is?" Rachel nodded. "He's like that with _everything_. Although he can be very take charge and confident, too. Like our first kiss- for some reason I thought he was going to be timid or passive. He's definitely not either one of those things when it's just us."

"Really?

"Nope."

"Then, no offense, what's the hold up?"

She hesitated momentarily. She'd usually try to talk to Topanga about this stuff, but despite what she said Angela could sense loyalty to Shawn. Plus she could get uptight sometimes when sex was mentioned. It was odd because she wasn't always like that. Breanne was getting to be a pretty good friend and has proved to be an unbiased sounding board for her relationship with Eric, but she had a tendency to overshare. Maybe Rachel would be a good compromise between the two. "I want us to talk about it first. We need to both be on the same page and understand what this step would mean for us. I've rushed into the sex part of relationships before and all it got me was a couple, 'it's not you, it's me,' speeches to go along with a broken heart."

"Shawn," she guessed, her voice tinged with sympathy.

"Shawn was the one that hurt the most because he was supposed to be different. But he wasn't."

"Sorry."

She shrugged off her pity. "It's life experience learned the hard way. Eric's been pretty patient with me. Don't get me wrong, I can tell he's getting frustrated and sick to death of the cold showers and stopping in the middle of fooling around. I am, too. But I just worry that once we have that conversation-"

"He'll be hounding you to get into bed?"

"It sounds nuts when you say it like that because it makes it seem like I don't trust him and I do. I trust him completely. He's never pressured me and I feel 100% safe when I'm with him." Angela groaned and massaged her temples. "Why is this so complicated?"

"Because that's what happens when you mix people, sex, and relationships. You have a past, he has a past, and you've both experienced heartbreak. Would you really appreciate what you have now if it came easily?"

"To be honest I probably wouldn't be able to trust that it was real."

"So maybe a little struggle and complication isn't always a bad thing?"

"I guess not. Maybe that's how we should spend next Friday. Screw going to the movies or a museum. Date day will be talk day."

"I think that's good. You'll feel better about it once you get it all out there."

"Thanks, Rachel. How do you know so much about this?"

"Oh, I'm a natural observer of people," she bragged before turning serious. "That and I've had my own share of heartbreak and can spot it when I see it."

"Sorry."

"That's okay. What was it you said? It's life experience earned the hard way."

"It's a crappy club to be in but I suppose it builds character," Angela said in an attempt to make a joke. "Do you mind if I take a few of those strawberries?"

"I don't care, but I should warn you, all this food is for you."

"Huh?" She listened as Rachel explained about Jack and his apology breakfasts. "That's so sweet, but completely unnecessary."

"I know, but he means well. Plus he makes amazing French toast, splurges on expensive bread and everything."

"In that case bring on the French toast!"

"Can I mention one thing before Jack gets back?"

"Sure."

"Your shirt is on inside out and backwards- quite the feat."

"What the-" Angela looked down and saw the tag under her chin. "How the hell did I miss this?"

"You were blinded by my stunning good looks," Eric declared as he entered the room. "And who can blame you, really?" She threw a strawberry at him, but he caught it. "Ha-ha. I can catch, too." He looked at the counter and recognized the familiar set up. "Ooh, Rach, is this what I think it is?"

"Jack's making breakfast."

"Yes! He cooks much better when he's feeling guilty."

"Be nice to him," the redhead warned.

"Tell me I'm wrong."

"Well…it's still not nice to say."

"Ha, vindication: Eric."

/

Later, once Rachel retired to her room to finish up homework and Eric went to get ready for his shift at the Student Union Angela was alone in the kitchen with Jack. She knew he wanted to talk, he kept looking at her like he was going to say something, but nothing came out. "You can stop walking around on eggshells. I'm not mad at you."

He turned around from where he had been washing dishes in the sink. "Really? I'm mad at me. How can you not be?"

"You were in an unpredictable situation and had a split second to react. I don't blame you for how you handled it."

"I wish I would've done something…just…just something. Anything would've been better than standing there like an idiot. I watched Chet do that to my mother when I was a little kid and I never wanted to see it happen to anyone else. When I saw Shawn put his hands on you for a split second I was four years old watching Chet with my mom again. You had the same look on your face that she had on hers'. I know that's not an excuse, but I think that's why I froze up."

"I sorry you had to go through that."

"It's not your fault."

"And neither Chet's nor Shawn's actions are yours'."

"Yeah, but they're family. Who doesn't feel responsible for family?"

She was quiet, thinking about her own parents. "Maybe, but consider yourself forgiven. I don't blame you now and I never did."

Jack exhaled, feeling as though a tremendous weight had been lifted off of his chest. "Thank you. I appreciate it. Now, about last night-"

"Oh, last night…in front of everyone…why? What were you thinking? That's just bad all around. I don't know how you expected it to play out any differently."

The tightening in his chest was quickly returning. "I didn't want to chicken out again."

"I get that, but seriously next time, don't say something like that in front of a group."

He nodded. That seemed to be where he went wrong. Everyone agreed on that. "Right. I pray like hell there won't be a next time, but I got it. Can I apologize for one more thing?"

"I guess."

"I'm sorry I didn't bother getting to know you better when you were dating Shawn. All the times you would hang out here with him, I should've taken an interest or asked you something. All I did was say hi and bye."

"Jack it's okay. I wasn't going around asking for your life story either. You made as much effort as I did."

"I promise I'll make an effort now."

"I don't want to cause a rift in your relationship with Shawn."

He shook his head and stared down at the frying pan soaking in the sink. "That complicates things, doesn't it?"

"I didn't mean to make things with you guys more difficult."

"I don't think that's possible. Eric's my best friend, he's my brother…I have no clue what I'm doing,"

"I'm sorry."

"I'll figure something out. So…are we good?"

She smiled before leaning forward to kiss his cheek. "We were never bad."

/

/

"Eric, thank goodness you're here."

"What's wrong, April," he asked his co-worker, "big crowds this morning?"

"No just rude, grumpy, or hung over people- the usual."

"Ooh, the Sunday hung over crowd, my favorite!"

"I know. You've mastered that annoying loudness that people want to kill you for yet you smile and sound so happy that they can't."

"I'm pretty awesome, right? They give me extra tip money just to get me to shut up and go away."

"Damn," she muttered, "that's genius. Anyway, I'm taking a break."

He went behind the counter and checked on the various coffee makers and toaster ovens. "Okay, take your time and…" He looked up and saw Cory and Shawn enter and approach the counter. Even knowing they saw him, Eric still and darted back to the storage closet. "What do you mean you forgot where the napkins are? Top shelf, dummy."

"Eric, what the hell are you talking about," April asked, following him back there.

"I need you to go wait on my brother and his friend."

"Are you kidding? I'm taking my break. I've been here by myself for three hours."

"Please? I can't deal with them right now."

"You guys have a fight?"

"Something like that."

"Then don't you think the best way to make up with them would be to bring them a hot cup of coffee and some cinnamon rolls?"

"I'm not the one who needs to do the making up. If I have to deal with them I might hurt them."

She raised an eyebrow. "I want details. I deserve some dirt after the morning I had."

"Sorry."

"Eric-"

"Please? I'll give you half my tips today."

"Really?"

"I swear."

"Fine." She put her purse down and went back to the register. "What do you want?"

"Where's Eric? I know he's here. I just saw him."

"He's getting napkins from the supply closet."

Cory lifted the dispenser. "This is full."

"Your point?"

"I think I'll wait for my brother."

"Cor, let's just get our food and go," Shawn piped in. He didn't want to deal with Eric today. Mainly because he had no idea how he'd react. If their positions were reversed he can't say he'd handle it well.

"But nothing gets solved by-"

"Nothing gets solved by making a scene either."

He sighed. Shawn was right. Besides, Topanga wouldn't be happy with him if he caused drama. "Fine."

/

/

"Well this is a nice surprise," Amy said when she came down the stairs and found her eldest sitting at the kitchen table. "Or is it not a surprise and sleep deprivation made me forget a planned visit?"

"No, I'm a surprise."

"You have been since the pregnancy test came back positive." She ruffled his hair before going to the coffee pot. "One surprise after another."

Eric scrunched up his face. "Ugh, mom, don't gross me out now."

Just then Alan came in through the back door. "Leave it to me to get all the way to the store and realize I forgot the drill I needed to fix that shelf. Oh, Eric, good, I'm glad you're here. I wanted to talk to you about last week with the deliveries. Maybe I overreacted a little and from now on I'll handle-"

"Dad, forget about the deliveries. I'm over that. I need to talk to you guys."

"What is it, honey," Amy asked.

"I don't know, maybe I'm not supposed to get mad about it after the fact, but I want to kill him. It makes you wonder how well you know people." It had been a few days since he hid in the supply closet to avoid confronting Cory and Shawn and he still wasn't feeling any better about the situation. "Can you trust any of them, huh? Tell me."

"What are you talking about? Is everything okay with you and Angela?"

"Rachel threw this dinner party the other night. She made a big deal about wanting to feel like an adult and have nice food and get dressed up- all that."

She almost laughed at that description of being an adult. They'd find out soon enough what being an adult was really about. "That sounds nice."

"The food was taking a while to cook and Rachel got inspired by Cory and Topanga's pledge to tell each other the absolute truth about everything 100% of the time-"

"-oh brother," Alan mumbled.

"Right. Anyway, she's inspired and mentioned this honesty game she would play with her friends in high school. We had time to kill, so we played."

"I'm going to take a wild guess that it wasn't all that fun?"

"It was a disaster even before Cory asked Jack the question. He asked if there was anything he wanted to say to someone in the room, but hadn't. I'm thinking he's going to say something to Shawn, or maybe me or Rachel. You know- dumb roommate crap that's been bugging him. But he starts to talk to Angela instead." He got up from the table and paced around the room. "He says he owes her an apology."

"For what?"

"You guys remember when Cory and Shawn got stupid drunk and peed on the cop car?"

"Unfortunately."

"And Cory stopped after that but Shawn didn't?"

"Yes."

"One day when he was drunk he put his hands on Angela."

Alan crossed his arms and stood a little straighter. "He did what?"

"He got mad and shoved her into a door."

Amy leaned back against the counter. They knew about ditching classes, insulting Mr. Feeny, and angry verbal outbursts, but they were unaware he'd actually gotten physical with anyone. "Is she okay now? Was she okay then?"

"She says she is. It scared her and she refused to talk to Shawn until he got help, which he did. I remember that part. When she took him back she told him if he ever drank again that was it. The only reason she gave him a second chance was because she knew the alcohol added to the situation."

"I can see why you're upset with Shawn-"

"Upset? No, I want to kill him. Or at least shove him against a door a few times and see how he likes it."

Alan understood where his son was coming from. Hell, part of him was tempted to ride shotgun and hold Shawn down so Eric could teach him a lesson. But he knew that wasn't the right way to handle this. "That won't solve anything."

"I know. But it's not just him, it's everyone."

"I don't understand."

"That's why Jack apologized. He, Cory, and Topanga were there when it happened and they didn't do anything to help her. They just let her run out of the apartment." He ran his hands across his face. "Jack always felt bad for not doing anything, but said he was in shock and didn't know how to react."

"No one can predict how they'll handle it when faced with a situation like that. I'm sure it's even more confusing when the person exhibiting violent behavior is someone you love."

"I would've done something," he insisted.

"It's easy to say that when you have the benefit of hindsight."

"No, it's not hindsight. I would've stopped him or helped Angela...something. Anything. No one even gave her a ride home. She had to walk."

"Honey, what does Angela say about this?"

"She doesn't want to relive it anymore. It's over. She made her peace with it."

"Then that's what you have to do as well. It's her call. If she says this incident is in the past then that's where you need to leave it."

"But Shawn-"

"I know, but you need to handle this her way. Don't do it for Shawn or Jack, Cory, or Topanga. Do it for Angela because that's how she wants it. Eric, I know you just found out about this, but it's obviously not something recent. It was dealt with, maybe poorly in some cases, but that doesn't change anything."

He shook his head. "So I just go back to the way things were, like I knew nothing? People who were supposed to be her friends treated her like crap."

"You don't have to pretend nothing happened, but don't let it dominate your interactions. Follow Angela's lead. If there's ever a time she wants to talk to you about it, be there for her and let her talk."

"That seems like doing a whole lot of nothing."

"Never underestimate the value of being there for someone and being their safe place. Believe me, that kind of trust and intimacy in a relationship is priceless." His face twisted in disgust and he covered his ears. "What's that look about?"

"My mommy said intimacy. Yuck."

"That's the only thing you're taking away from our conversation?"

"No," he said with a sigh, "I got it. Although you did just use a bunch of words to tell me I can't do a damn thing about what happened."

"You can't change the past. All you can do is focus on the future you want with Angela and do your best to make sure it's a good one. You're here for her now. That matters."

"I guess."

"Speaking of the future, when are you going to bring her over for dinner?"

"How is that talking about the future?"

"Things appear to be going well for you two and it seems like you're serious about her-"

"I've never been this serious about anyone."

"Right, so I'd like to get to know her better."

"I'll talk to Angela and let you know. Stuff is hectic with everyone is getting ready for finals."

"I suppose that is a valid excuse, but the next time you both have an opening in your schedules, I want you here. Got it?"

"Yes." He checked the time. "Ooh, I have to go. My statistics class starts in thirty minutes."

"How is class going?"

Eric shrugged. "I got a B on my last quiz, so...not bad."

"That's fantastic. I'm so proud of you. You've been working so hard lately."

"Angela's study tips really pay off. I'll see you later. It would suck to be late and have poor attendance bring my grade down. Dad, you still want me at the store tomorrow afternoon?"

"Of course."

"Cool. Bye."

"Wow," Amy muttered, shaking her head.

"What?"

"All those years we grounded him constantly because we thought the girls were negatively affecting his schoolwork. What if that was wrong?"

"Maybe."

She could tell that her husband was distracted and not paying attention to what she was saying. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I need to get back to the store. That shelf won't fix itself."

"You know everything I said to Eric applies to you, too, right?"

"What?"

"Don't go talking to Shawn about what happened right now, leave Cory alone, too. We can mention it the next time they come over in a calm and rational manner, but an ambush would not work."

"I can be calm and rational, you know."

She didn't bother to hide her laughter. "Really, after twenty-two years of marriage maybe you'd like you show it to me sometime."

"Ha-ha."

"I know you. You have a protective streak about a mile wide and if you see an injustice you don't want to rest until it's fixed. It doesn't just cover me and our kids. The protectiveness came out with Shawn when Chet and Virna were coming and going, leaving Shawn with us or Mr. Turner and then when Shawn turned to that cult..." She shook her head. "I swear if it's not one thing it's another with him. The kid is a damn movie of the week."

"You're actually excusing what he did?"

"Are you kidding? Do you know how much restraint I'm showing by not marching over there and yelling at him?"

"I can't believe Cory just stood there. I thought we raised the kids to intervene if they see something wrong."

"Alan, it's Shawn. If he told Cory he was going to kill him our son would not only provide the weapon but give tips on the most effective way to get it done so as to make it easier on him."

He shook his head, realizing she was probably right. "Idiots," he muttered, "the both of them."

/

/

"…and so I was thinking why don't I just sleep over again on Thursday and we can spend Friday talking and stuff." Angela watched Eric from her spot on the couch in the Student Union. He was cleaning up for the night. "What do you think?"

"An all-day talk, huh? Sounds big." He sat near her on the arm of the couch. Now he was nervous. He thought this talk would cover their pasts and preferred methods of protection…stuff like that. What on earth could they cover in an all-day relationship sex talk? It sounded like something you needed to study for.

"Talking wouldn't cover the whole day. We could get take out and rent a movie. I was thinking The Fugitive," she said with a smile. "You know, I kinda keep thinking about the one-armed man."

"But he was ugly. At least compare me to Tommy Lee Jones if you don't think I'm Harrison Ford worthy."

Angela braced her hand on his thigh and sat up on her knees, leaning towards him. "Please, you're way hotter than Harrison Ford."

"That's what I'm talking about." He put his hand on the back of her neck, drawing her closer for a kiss. "And you are way more beautiful than any-"

"That was terrible," Topanga ranted as she entered the building with Cory and Shawn. "I'm sorry, but what reception hall worth their salt offers salsa as an appetizer option?"

"People like salsa, honey." Cory froze when he realized the cozy scene they were walking in on. "Oh…hi."

Angela sighed before she reluctantly sat back down, though her hand remained on Eric's leg. She'd swear she heard him growl under his breath when he saw them. "Hi." For several seconds no one talked. It had been like this a lot lately. Ever since the party there was awkward silences whenever she was near Cory, Shawn, or Topanga even though she told them there didn't need to be. "What were you saying about salsa?"

"Oh, it was awful." Topanga sat beside her friend. "The reception hall billed themselves as a classy establishment but the food on the menu was what you'd expect at a barbecue."

"Was it really that bad?"

"What would you say if I had turkey burger sliders, cheese balls, pigs in a blanket, and bacon wrapped potatoes at my wedding reception?"

"That you let Cory plan the menu," Angela guessed.

"Hey!"

"Bacon wrapped potatoes sound like the perfect food," Eric said. "You should have those anyway."

"That's what I said," Shawn added hesitantly. "The samples were good."

It was silent again. Eric debated how to handle this. He was still upset with the three of them, but he kept hearing Angela and his mom in his head. Angela didn't want to drag it up again and mom said to follow her lead. He wasn't quite sure he could do that, but it was challenging to carry a grudge when he had to see them every day. Besides, if Angela could move on and still be friends with them- though he didn't understand how- he owed it to her to try as well. "There's a bag of muffins and scones in the back that are supposed to be tossed if they're not eaten by the end of the day. You-you guys want some?"

Topanga was the first to speak up. "Sounds great."

"Yeah," Cory added, "thanks. Right, Shawnie?"

"Uh-huh."

Angela smiled at Eric and squeezed his hand. "Just don't press your luck with coffee. Those dishes are already done."


	21. Chapter 21

"Ooh, what are we doing," Topanga asked upon entering her dorm and finding Angela with what seemed to be her entire wardrobe spread out on her side of the room. "Then again, who cares? If it involves picking an outfit it must be fun."

"I need help."

"That much is clear. What's going on? Where's Eric taking you tonight?"

"To meet his parents," she mumbled. Eric had talked to her again about his mom's open dinner invitation and she tried to put it off, but then Amy personally called her to let her know she was welcome anytime. It was impossible to say no after that. The woman was too sincere.

"Um, Angela, you know Mr. and Mrs. Matthews. You've met them a bunch of times. Heck, you spent Christmas at their house, remember?"

"First of all," she began, pointing a finger at Topanga's face, "Christmas sucked. My dad was halfway around the world and me and Shawn...well, it just sucked. I don't want to think about Christmas anymore."

"Fine, but that doesn't change the fact that you've still met the Matthews."

"I've met Cory's parents. Tonight I'm meeting _my boyfriend's_ parents."

"They're the same people."

"Maybe, but it's not the same situation. I've never had to meet parents before. What do I do? Tell me what to do!"

"Okay, first we're going to breathe," Topanga ordered. She wrapped an arm around her friend. "Deep breaths in and out. There you go," she soothed when Angela took deep breaths. "Feel better?"

"A little. Sorry. I just don't have experience with parents, mothers especially."

"You don't have to worry. Mr. and Mrs. Matthews are the most welcoming, understanding people in the world."

She thought about everything they had done for Shawn. They never hesitated to step in where his parents failed him. "I know."

"They're going to love you whether you're in their house as Cory's friend or Eric's girlfriend. You were welcomed for the holidays with open arms even after you and Shawn-"

"Topanga…"

"Sorry. The point is you have nothing to worry about. They are going to love you."

"Thanks." She took another deep breath. "Were you this nervous the first time you had dinner at their house?"

"The first time I had dinner at their house I was probably three."

"I meant as Cory's girlfriend."

"Again, probably three."

Angela thought back to what Eric said so many months ago, about how Cory and Topanga constantly rewrote the history of their romance and falling in love. "Right."

"To be honest the one you're really going to have to win over is Morgan. She's the critic of the family."

"I know even less about siblings than I do parents. You've got a sister. Help me out."

"Sister," Topanga scoffed. "Are you talking about Nebula Stop-the-War Lawrence or Sister Mary Hildegard of the Sisters of Mercy?"

"Um…either…both? How are she and the other nuns doing?"

"Oh, fine. She's not an official nun yet, still in training, but she's helping to run an orphanage in...crap. I don't remember where she is now."

"You sound a little bitter. I've never been a religious person and I couldn't commit myself to the lifestyle, but nuns generally do good, right?"

"I'm not bitter. I just miss having my sister be _my_ sister. Now she's the world's sister." Topanga remembered one night about six years ago, she woke up to doors slamming and loud yelling. Her sister and parents were fighting again. But that night was different. When she went out to investigate she found Nebula in her room, crying and throwing her belongings into a suitcase. After a tearful hug and a promise to stay in touch, she was out the door. The events of that night were never mentioned again and her parents acted as though their eldest child never existed. Nebula seemed to take the happy, carefree, hippy spirit of the house with her when she left. Nothing was the same after that.

"Topanga, you okay?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine." She resumed looking through Angela's wardrobe. "This just reminded me that I need to send Nebbie a birthday card before next week. I know my parents won't. So...what were we talking about?"

"Morgan's a tough critic."

"Right. I haven't spent a lot of time with her lately, but if she's anything like she was when she was younger just talk to her and she'll be happy."

"Just talk to her? That's it?"

"She used to like it when I would do fun things with her hair, but she's probably over that now. She's not six anymore."

"Thanks, that helps a lot," Angela said sarcastically.

"Sorry. Okay, I say wear this peasant top with those jeans and…ooh these are cute. Wear these." She picked up a shoe from the floor. "I don't remember seeing these ankle boots before."

"I went to that new outlet mall with Breanne and her dorm mate the other day and couldn't pass these up. We should go sometime. The peasant top came from a thrift shop there."

More time spent with other friends. It was hard not to feel put out. "Yeah, sure. What are you doing with that," she asked when Angela took a small duffle bag out from under her bed.

"I, uh-"

"You're not coming back tonight," she concluded.

"No, I'm not."

"Have…fun? Is that the right thing to say?"

"Eric and I have plans all day tomorrow. It just makes more sense to spend the night." She would love to talk to Topanga, to confide in her how serious things with Eric were getting, but she couldn't. There was no guarantee that she wouldn't tell Cory. And once Cory knew everyone else would know, including Shawn. Those three had always been the worst version of the game _Telephone_. While she didn't care what anyone else thought about her relationship, it was _her_ relationship. Whatever happened next was between her and Eric.

"Right." She couldn't help but laugh when she saw the pajamas Angela tossed in the bag. "Still trying to impress him, huh?"

"What?"

"Cute pajamas."

"Thanks. They were another score at the outlet mall."

"No, I mean you're bringing cute pajamas to sleep over at Eric's. That's kind of romantic."

"They're just pajamas. No different than the ones I regularly wear. Nothing about them says romance. The shorts have ice cream cones on them for crying out loud."

"And who has a bigger sweet tooth than your boyfriend?" She smiled. "When you think about it, it's almost more romantic than if you had gone out and bought lingerie."

Angela examined the contents of her bag. Everything was new. Everything was cute…or at the very least it matched. Hell, the pajamas were even blue. Eric's favorite color was blue. "God, you're right. How the hell did I miss this? Maybe I should just pack something else. I mean I don't care what anyone thinks about me or their opinions on my clothes."

"Eric's not just anyone to you. It's not a crime to want to look good for him. He does it for you."

"What do you mean?"

"He's not running with Jack at the crack of dawn for himself."

"He's running?"

"Jack does almost every day-I think he said he scheduled his classes around getting his work outs in- but Eric joins him a few times a week. They usually get back to the gym when I'm on the treadmill. After he lifts weights for a little while he rewards himself by attacking the heavy bag like a madman and pretends he's Rocky." Topanga was grateful for the entertainment most mornings. It was an excuse to laugh and a needed distraction from the dreaded treadmill, decorated with pictures of wedding dresses for inspiration. "His trash talk is pathetic, by the way."

She laughed. That sounded like Eric.

"Of course then he swings from the bag and yells like Tarzan, so…" She shook her head. "…anyway, you see? You're not the only one out to impress."

"Thanks. That kind of makes me feel better."

"Good."

Angela checked the time. "Oh, I have to finish getting ready if I'm going to catch the bus."

"You're not riding with Eric?"

"He's working at the store with Alan today so I'm meeting him at the house."

"Oh. Well, have fun. And like I said, you have nothing to worry about. Even if tonight was the first time you were meeting the Matthews they'd still love you."

"Thanks."

/

/

"No, not tonight."

"Come on, Shawnie, come to the movies. Jack's stepdad got passes to an early screening of some new Julia Roberts' romantic comedy…or drama…not sure. The previews didn't make it look funny. Is dramedy a word? If it's not I'm inventing in because it should be. Come see the romantic dramedy with us. I think Hugh Grant's in it, too. We can talk with fake British accents and annoy Topanga the rest of the night. Payback for dragging us to a chick movie."

"You're double dating with my brother? That's weird."

"Topanga and Rachel cooked it up. I think they wanted to smooth over last week's dinner party from hell. There's still two extra passes. So come with us."

"And have you guys blind date me with that last leftover pass? No, thanks."

"There's no blind date. Rachel invited a friend from her algebra class, but it's not a-"

"Not happening."

"But Shawn-"

"No. You're the one who's been on me to finish out freshman year before making any decisions about next year. You see this stack of books?" He gestured to the books in front of him. "I have to catch up on this if I want to pass."

Cory sighed. At least Shawn was doing homework instead of going to the photography studio again. "All right, but we're doing something tomorrow after class, okay?"

"Fine."

"Maybe we'll go to the arcade. It's been a while since I beat you in _Street Fighter II_."

"You mean it's been a while since I let you win."

He sat up a little straighter. "Is that so?"

"That is so."

"That sounds like a challenge, Hunter."

"Maybe it is."

"Arcade, two o'clock before all the annoying little kids get out of school. I'll get the tokens and you buy the vending machine candy. Best three out of five, loser buys dinner."

"Deal."

"Hi, honey," Topanga said, coming up from behind and kissing Cory's cheek. "What time are we meeting Jack and Rachel?"

"Twenty minutes. You're a little late."

"Yeah, sorry about that. I was helping Angela get ready. She and Eric are having dinner with your parents tonight. She's so nervous. It was kind of cute." She realized a few seconds too late she may have said too much in front of Shawn. "Sorry."

"That's okay. So…they've hit the 'have dinner with the parents' stage already?"

"What do you mean stage? Angela knows my parents. There's no milestone to hit with them."

Shawn shook his head. "No, trust me. It means something."

"Come to the movie with us," she offered.

"No, thanks. I'm up to my ass in homework."

"If you're sure…"

"I am."

"Okay. See you later," Topanga said, offering a small wave.

"Bye."

"Arcade tomorrow," Cory reminded him.

"Two o'clock. I got it."

Shawn was about twenty minutes into studying when he decided it was time for a coffee break. He wasn't paying attention, however, when he backed up his chair and bumped into someone. When he turned around to apologize he saw Mr. Feeny, bent over and holding his shin. "Sorry, Mr. Feeny. I didn't see you there."

"That's okay, Mr. Hunter. At least it seems you were lost in your school books instead of whatever else seems to have been holding your attention lately."

"Can I buy you coffee…or a bag of ice for the bruise?"

"Coffee will be fine, thank you."

"Here you go," Shawn said, returning a couple minutes later with two coffees. "Sorry again about your leg."

"It's nothing. So, those are a lot of books you have there. Cramming for finals?"

"More like playing catch up so I can take my finals and finish up the year."

"Ah, yes, a lot of students find the first year of college to be a challenge. The good news is that they are more prepared and have an easier time the following year."

"What about the ones who decide to cut their losses?"

"I'm afraid I don't follow."

"What would you say to someone who is considering not coming back to college in the fall?"

"Ah, now I follow."

"This year has sucked. A lot of it has been my fault, but a lot of it wasn't, and I feel like I need something fresh…something different. I have my job at the photography studio. I'm making good money and I like it a lot. I'm good at something and don't feel like a failure."

"Shawn, you're not a failure. I don't want you to think of yourself as one. I know your father's death was a shock, especially since your relationship was never that great and-"

"It's not just my dad. I destroyed my relationship with Angela and shoved her away for good. Now she's with Eric and lucky me has had a front row seat to the whole damn thing." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "And school…let's face it, I've always been a crap student."

"When you apply yourself and focus on the work you can be good."

"I feel like I need to do something, like I need to hit some sort of reset button on my life. And whatever I do I don't want to be indebted to Jack's rich stepdad for it."

"And leaving college is that reset button?"

"It's all I can come up with. Let's face it, the only reason I'm here in the first place is because Cory nagged me. I wanted to work fulltime at the studio right after graduation."

"It sounds to me like your mind is already made up."

He rested his chin on the stack of textbooks and he tapped the pencil eraser against his temple. "Do you think I'm making a mistake?"

"Shawn, I am the first one who will tout the benefits of a college education. I think it's a good thing and can only open more doors for you. However…"

"There's a however," he asked, his eyes wide in shock. "Coming from you? You realize this is about me leaving college, right?"

"I gathered that, yes. I was going to say that you have had a rather tumultuous year and sometimes a break- or reset- is needed to reevaluate the state of your life. Do I want you to stay in college? Do I believe it can only help you? Yes, but if your heart isn't in it and this isn't where you want to be then perhaps it isn't where you should be right now. That doesn't mean you can't decide to come back later, but staying and going through the motions will be of no use to you."

"I can't believe you're saying this. I thought you'd be giving me a whole list of reasons to stay."

"That isn't my place. I'll help guide you to make the decision that is best for you if you ask for advice, but ultimately the choice is yours. You don't need my permission to leave nor do you need me to talk you into staying."

"Really?"

"Really." He offered a kind smile. "It's your life and I trust that you are capable enough to make this decision on your own. If you need to speak with me you know my door is always open, but I cannot tell you what to do, not anymore. It's time for you to take the reins and control your own destiny."

"Destiny? You're all about facts and logic. Since when do you talk about destiny, Mr. Feeny?"

"Are you ready, George?"

Shawn looked up and saw Dean Bolander standing behind his longtime teacher. "Big date tonight?"

"I wish," she lamented. "There is this dinner for area college deans. Honestly, it's the most boring evening. At least this year I have someone to complain to and to nudge me awake if I start to doze off during the speeches."

"Yes, but who's to save me if I fall asleep?"

"Oh, don't even think about it. If you fall asleep you are in so much trouble."

"Don't worry, Dean, I loaded him up full of coffee for you just now."

"Good. George, if I fall asleep tonight, it's on you."

He got up and followed her towards the door. "So much for personal responsibility. I should be the one allowed to fall asleep. You are dragging me to this boring affair after all."

"Payback for the opera last week."

" _La Traviata_ is not boring! You just have no appreciation for…"

Shawn laughed quietly to himself as they continued to bicker on their way out the door. They already sounded like they'd been together for years instead of just a few weeks. Or had it been a month already? No, it's been longer than a month. He really needed to look at a calendar every once in a while instead of just doing what he needed to get through that particular day. He pulled out his biology book next. The entire time he studied he worried about how to break the news to Cory that he was closer than ever to his decision about school without his friend going ballistic.

/

/

_Did she go in the front door or walk around to the back?_ Angela was halfway up the walk to the Matthews home when she realized she didn't know which door to go to. Sure, traditionally you go to the front door when you go to someone's home, but nearly every time she has come here she has been led in through the back door. Granted, those times she was with Eric or with Shawn, Cory, and Topanga. This was the first time she was here alone. Would she be asserting some familiarity that wasn't hers' to own? Still, the kitchen seemed to be the central area of the house, the heart of the home. Someone was always there. With that in mind she decided to take her chances and walked around to the back of the house.

Just as she suspected Amy was in the kitchen. She moved effortlessly from the counter to stove to check something below in the oven. A few seconds later she was at the table to look over what she could only assume was Morgan's homework. It was so domestic, so normal…such a typical family moment to have. She had vague memories that went back about ten years of being in a similar situation with her own mother. She pushed those to the back of her mind, however. No good came from thinking about that woman. It only led to heartache. Just as she was about to raise her hand to knock, Morgan spotted her standing outside and pointed to her mom. Seconds later the door opened and Angela found herself being pulled inside. "Hi. Sorry, I guess I'm a little early."

"Sweetie, no, you're right on time. In fact this dinner is long overdue."

She supposed that was her fault, given how she kept avoiding it when Eric would tell her about his mom's open invitation. The whole family thing- mothers especially- made her nervous. She couldn't help it. "Sorry about that."

Amy sensed the young woman's apprehension and squeezed her hand. "Stop apologizing. I'm just glad our schedules finally matched up."

"I brought you flowers," she said, holding up one of the bags in her hand.

"Why," Morgan asked from her spot at the table.

"Um…I thought it would be nice?" Did she mess this up, too? "You know, hostess gifts and all that. Never show up empty handed."

"Oh, these are lovely," Amy exclaimed, taking them out of the bag, "and they'll really brighten up the table. You didn't have to bring anything. Just you being here is enough, but I do appreciate these. Morgan, go get a vase out of the china cabinet."

The girl mumbled something on her way out of the room, causing Angela to ask, "Is she okay? Did I do something wrong?"

"You're fine. She's thirteen and today she's particularly good at being thirteen."

She nodded in sympathy. "Ah, I've been there. I definitely don't miss those days."

"Here, mom, the vase."

"Thanks, honey."

"Oh, Morgan, I figured you wouldn't care about flowers and I think I remember Eric telling me the peanut M&Ms were your favorite. I hope that was right."

"Definitely!" She snatched the candy out of Angela's hand. "Thank you."

"Save it for after dinner."

"It's a king sized bag, mom. That means some for now and some for later."

"Morgan…."

"A few for now?"

"Provided you share a few with your mother, sure."

"Deal," she relented. "So Angela, what's with the duffle bag? More hostess gifts?"

Was there a dignified way to tell someone you were spending the weekend with their brother and son? "No, it's uh-it's…"

"Morgan, it's almost time to eat. Go put your books upstairs. Dad and Eric will be here soon."

"But, mom-"

"Just go," she ordered, pointing to the stairs.

"Whatever."

"And if you could do it without sighing and rolling your eyes as if I'm asking you to move a pyramid that'd be great, thank you," Amy lectured after her daughter as she disappeared up the stairs. "Angela?"

"Yes?"

"You can put your bag by the coat rack. You don't have to hold it all night."

"Right. Thanks." She dropped the bag by the back door, grateful that she didn't have to come up with an excuse for why she had it. Though she suspected Amy had already come to her own conclusions. "Is there anything I can help with?"

"The pot roast is practically done. It just needs to sit for about twenty more minutes. I was just about to make a salad." Just then the baby began to cry from his bassinet in the living room. "Okay, plan B. Do you want to keep an eye on Josh or peel and chop vegetables?"

"Vegetables," she answered with no hesitation.

Amy nodded. "Cutting board is in the drainer, vegetable peeler is in the drawer to the left of the microwave, and the knife block is behind you. The veggies are already washed. I'm going to check his diaper and then I'll be back."

"Do you want them cut a certain way: sliced, diced, chopped, Julienne, Jardiniere, Paysanne?"

She wasn't even sure what those last few were. "So long as they're cut up and in the bowl it doesn't matter to me. Go crazy."

"Wow, fancy," Morgan remarked when she came back down the stairs a few minutes later. "Where did you learn to cut like that?"

"I lived with my grandmother in high school. She loves to cook. She was an executive chef when she was younger, but some days her arthritis is bad in her hands and it's hard for her to handle a knife. I did the cutting and chopping those days." Before she moved out Angela gifted her grandmother with one of those easy choppers you'd see commercials for on TV. She seemed to like it well enough. "She taught me all different ways to cut fruits and vegetables. One of her favorite sayings is 'Food is fifty percent presentation. If it looks like garbage, people will assume it tastes that way.'"

"It's the prettiest salad I've ever seen." She swiped a carrot from the counter. "I might actually eat it tonight instead of hiding it under potatoes."

"Thanks." The silence that followed was awkward. Angela had never been alone with Morgan and didn't know what to do. She remembered Topanga's advice: talk to her. "So are your teachers overloading you with homework as it gets closer to the end of the year, too? I know mine are."

"It's like they have a quota to meet," the teen scoffed.

"What homework were you working on before?"

"I have this stupid poetry assignment for English class."

"Poetry is not stupid. It's one of the oldest forms of expression. You can say so much within just a few lines. Anything can become the subject of a poem if you look at it the right way."

"Could you stop talking and gesturing when you're holding a knife?" She held her hands up and backed away from the counter in a mock surrender. "I promise I won't say anything bad about poetry anymore."

Angela chuckled and set the utensil aside. "Sorry, I get pretty passionate about the subject. I love it. I've been in poetry clubs since high school."

"And you're telling me you can really turn anything into a poem?"

"Anything."

"Even this salad?"

"Yes, even salad could become a poem."

"Prove it," Morgan said, sliding a legal pad across the counter.

She was about to start writing- a few ideas came to mind almost instantly- but she thought better of it and put the pen down. "Do your own homework."

"Darn it, I thought that was going to work. It worked once with Topanga. She got halfway through an essay of mine because I bet her that she couldn't stretch the topic into four pages. And you know her…"

She nodded. "Topanga has to prove she can do everything."

"For someone so smart she was dumb enough to take the bait. How did you know?"

"You're not the first Matthews to try and trick me into doing their homework. Don't get me wrong, Eric's negotiation tactics are a lot more fun, but-"

"Ew, gross! I don't need to hear your secret code words for making out with my brother."

"The point is I can help you after dinner if you want. I won't do the assignment for you, but maybe I can give you a hand."

"Really?"

"Sure."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

A few minutes later Amy was taking the pot roast out of the oven while Morgan set the table. All the while baby Josh sat happily in his swing, babbling at some toys that dangled above his head. Angela was putting the finishing touches on the salad and was again struck by the domesticity of it all. When her phone rang a moment later she was going to let it go to voicemail, not wanting to take herself out of the moment, but when she saw the caller id she felt compelled to answer. She apologized to Amy before inching towards the door. "Hi, Nan, how are you?"

"Dad, all I'm saying is you need to start paying me a commission," Eric said as he and Alan came in the back door. "I've brought in a lot of money this month because you shove all the annoying customers onto-"

"Shh," Amy whispered harshly. Angela hadn't quite made it out of the kitchen, instead stopping in the nook between the stairs and second entrance to the living room. Eavesdropping wasn't the intention, but she couldn't very well leave her dinner unattended. Let alone her infant.

"I know, I miss you, too, but I've just been really busy with school. It's like I said the last time you called, finals are almost here and I'm trying to prepare." Angela was quiet as she listened to her grandmother on the other end of the phone. She squeezed the bridge of her nose, already feeling a headache coming on. Seconds later she felt a supportive hand resting on the small of her back. How Eric knew she needed that right now she had no idea, but she was grateful for his ESP, no matter how temporary. She sighed and fought the urge to completely relax against him. "What," she startled, standing a little straighter, "no, Nan, I'm still here. Yes, I'm listening." She loved her grandmother, but as with most things in her life, their relationship was complicated. "Look…once I know what my schedule looks like for next week I will give you a call and we can get together, all right? Great. I love you, too. Bye."

"Your grandmother again," he concluded, his hand still on her back. "What did she say?"

"Same thing- she wants to see me. There's something we have to talk about."

"Did she give you any hints?"

"Nope."

"Why don't you just go and get it over with? Then at least you'll know what she wants to tell you. I can give you a ride whenever you want."

"I'll figure something out and maybe see her next week. I'm just-it's a busy time…prepping for finals."

"What's your excuse to not see her going to be when finals are over?"

"We're not discussing this right now. And frankly, it's none of your business anyway so butt out."

"But, Angela, I just want-"

"Dinner's ready," Amy interrupted. "Everyone go wash your hands. Upstairs. Now."

Morgan, Eric, and Alan- knowing better than to argue with his wife on this- made their way up the stairs. Angela was about to follow after them when she was pulled aside. "Mrs. Matthews, what-"

"First, call me Amy. Second, you helped me make dinner so you can use this sink."

"And third, you just came up with that lame excuse to get them out of the room," she guessed.

"Maybe. I'm not prying and you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, but are you okay?"

"I'm sure I sound like a terrible person for putting off my grandmother, but our relationship is very complicated and no, I'd rather not get into it."

"No, you don't sound terrible. And if you don't want to talk about it I'll respect that, but if you ever change your mind I'm here." She wrapped what she thought would be a supportive arm around her son's girlfriend and was surprised when the young woman shied away from the gesture. It wasn't taken personally, however. Amy had long assumed that, much like Shawn, she was rife with parental drama and abandonment issues. "I'm a good listener. I can keep a secret better than anyone. And I'm always around."

"Thanks, Mrs…Amy. I'll keep that in mind."


	22. Chapter 22

"…and you and Cory are going to help us over the summer get Josh into Morgan's room and finally set up your old room for Morgan." Due to the baby's premature birth, they never did get around to setting up a nursery for him. And they've been too exhausted since he arrived to do it.

"Yeah, because the entire pregnancy and the past three months haven't been nearly enough time," the girl remarked with a roll of her eyes.

"Morgan-"

"I know, mom, it's been busy and you and dad are tired." She added more of Angela's salad to her plate. "But I can decorate however I want, right? That was the deal."

"Dad and I have veto power. And no, you can't paint the walls black."

"Wow, I'm jealous," Angela said to Morgan. "I never had a chance to go crazy and decorate my room."

"Are you serious? What kind of mean parents do you have if they wouldn't let you decorate your room?"

"Weasel-"

"It's fine," she said, cutting Eric off. "My dad's in the army and we lived in military housing. If we painted we had to put it back the way it was before we moved again. And we moved around a lot. I got to paint my room a few times when I was little, but it was never the colors I really wanted because it had to be something easy to cover.

"When I was six I decided to surprise my parents and take care of my room myself." Her family had just relocated to South Carolina- their third move in two years- and her dad was occupied with work on the base and her mom was busy trying to unpack and calling around to find temporary work. Little Angela was left to entertain herself in her room. She could usually be trusted not to get into mischief. "I gathered up all of my markers and finger paints and decided to decorate the walls. It said washable so I thought it would come off the walls easily like it did my hands."

"Oh, you must've made such a mess," Amy exclaimed, remembering when her own kids would get into similar situations.

"When I went to show my parents I was so excited for them to see my masterpiece. They weren't as happy about it as I was." Her dad, while exasperated, didn't yell. Despite his image as the stereotypical, tough army man he rarely raised his voice to her. Instead he gently explained that she wasn't allowed to color on the walls and made her help him clean it up. Her mother…didn't say a word. She looked at the walls, then to her husband and daughter, before turning on her heel and leaving the house. Angela didn't see her again until breakfast. "My art supplies were locked up for a long time after that and I had to ask permission to use them."

"That sucks."

She shrugged. "It's okay. I was still able to put up pictures and posters. I figure one day when I get my own place I can go nuts with colors. Still, if you don't mind I might live vicariously through you when you're decorating your new room."

"I've got a bunch of magazines and catalogues in my room if you want to take a look."

"Sure, you can show me right after we work on your poetry assignment."

Morgan shrunk down in her chair. "Oh…you remembered, huh?"

"She never forgets about homework," Eric quipped. "She's a weirdo like that."

"The guy who now has a dance for each time he gets a higher grade on a test is calling _me_ a weirdo?"

"Hey! You said you loved the dance."

"No, I said it was cute. And it is. I was just pointing out the-"

"Don't call me cute in front of my parents."

"But honey you are cute."

Eric made a face and covered his ears. "Ugh. You can't say that in front of my girlfriend. It's a million kinds of creepy."

"I can't help it. Just look at this face." Amy reached out and pinched his cheek. "Even when you were a baby people would always comment."

"Really?" Angela was getting a kick out of how embarrassed Eric seemed right now. This was definitely a side of him she hadn't seen before. It was, to use the word of the moment, cute.

"Oh, yes. He was born with a full head of hair and was just a very pretty baby. He was mistaken for a girl a lot his first year. Little old ladies would stop me all the time just to wave at him. And being the little ham that he is he loved all the attention- such a little flirt."

He buried his face in his hands. "Mooom…." It was one thing to brag about yourself, but to have your mom do it? And to your girlfriend? There were no words.

"Relax. It's not like I'm whipping out the photo albums. Unless…" She looked to Angela. "Do you want to see the photo albums?"

"Don't forget the video we have of him at about two, walking around with the seat from his potty chair on his head and said it was his crown. King Flush…isn't that what you wanted us to call you? No, it was Sir…that's it…Sir Flush."

His head hit the table. "Thanks, dad!"

She was tempted, very tempted, to see pictures but Eric had been tortured enough for one meal. "Maybe next time."

"Finally, some sanity! Thank you."

Morgan rested her chin in her hand. Weren't they just talking about her room? And her homework before that? How did the topic of conversation shift so quickly to Eric? Then again that tended to happen when her brothers were around. Eric, Cory, it didn't matter. They found a way to turn the conversation back to themselves. Josh was too young to do it on purpose, but he sure did cry at inconvenient times.

"…and I don't care what my date said, she was the one who rigged the game to steal all the tickets, remember Weasel? She collected Pez dispensers and wanted the Chuck E Cheese one for her collection."

"Is that true, Morgan?"

"Morgan, hello."

"Hey, Weasel, wake up," Eric said, shoving his sister.

"Ow! What did you do that for?"

"I was telling Angela about the time we got held by security in Chuck E. Cheese jail."

"Oh, yeah, because you broke the machine to steal the tickets. Shouldn't you be telling stories that make you look good?"

"I didn't…" He sighed. "You were there! You know it wasn't me. It wasn't me," he insisted.

"I'm going to finish my homework." Morgan got up from the table and made her way to the stairs. "Save me dessert."

"You still wanted my help, right," Angela asked.

"That's okay. I'm sure my stuff isn't as interesting as all the Eric stories."

"Please, I can hear stories of his mishaps anytime. It sounds like there are plenty of them."

"Hey, that's a little harsh."

She rubbed the top of his thigh under the table to show there was no malice behind her words. "Sorry. Did I say mishaps? I meant adventures."

"That's better."

"I promised Morgan I'd help her with a poem for her homework."

"Good thinking, Weasel. Angela knows poetry. She even likes the ones that don't rhyme."

"The best ones don't rhyme."

He shrugged. "If you say so."

/

"So?"

Angela read over what Morgan had written. "I like it. Good use of metaphors, similes, and the overall allegorical meaning behind it."

"Huh? Alle-who?"

"I understand what you're saying in your poem. I get what it's about." It was a little dark, but she remembered being thirteen. That was the time you started to experiment and test the boundaries of dark and cryptic, especially in artistic endeavors. "Do you really feel like this; lost and forgotten, or is it just for the poem?"

She closed her notebook and shoved it into her backpack. "I don't know. It depends on the day."

"And what is it today?"

"Today you said a poem can be about anything and some of the examples in my book were pretty depressing so that was the first thing that came into my head."

"Okay. You know if there's a day when you feel that way not just for the poem…I don't know…you can...if you want to, I mean…you can talk to me. I know what it's like to feel lost and forgotten about."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"I'll think about it. I still don't know you that well and I don't spill my guts to just anybody."

Angela nodded. That was something else they had in common. "That's fine. No pressure. Just if you want to talk…so where were those catalogues you were telling me about for your room?"

"On my dresser. I marked the pages with stuff I like."

"You like turquoise?" It seemed to be a common theme in her top favorites.

"A lot of colors go with it. Which bedding set do you like?"

"My favorite doesn't matter. Which one do you like the best?"

"I'm stuck between two favorites. I need another opinion."

"Well, without knowing which two are in the running, I'd have to go with the turquoise with the purple and hot pink accents."

"It's fuchsia."

"Sorry, fuchsia."

"That's one of my favorites."

"I can see why." She thumbed through the next few pages of the catalogue. "I'm so jealous. I dreamed of doing this when I was a kid. You have a blank slate to work with."

"You want to see what's going to be my room? I already know where I want the furniture."

"Sure."

/

"…Eric and Cory had their beds along this wall but I thought with the built-in shelves it would be better to put my desk here," Morgan explained. When Cory moved out for college her parents gave her his full sized bed and moved the twin beds back into this room. "My bed could go over there." She pointed to the far wall.

"That's smart. And it would keep the room nice and open. It sounds like you have it all planned out."

"This was supposed to be done before Josh was born so I've had time to plan."

"Hey, Weasel, telephone," Eric said, appearing in the doorway.

"Who is it?"

"Courtney, Stephanie, Brittany…something like that."

"You just named three of my friends. Which one of them is it and what do they want?" She assumed, like most nights, a friend had forgotten something for homework.

"She wants you pick up the phone! I don't know. I'm not your messenger."

"I'm so lucky to have you for a big brother," she deadpanned.

"Thanks, I think so, too."

"Maybe next I'll tell Angela about all the times you used me to help you get dates."

"What?"

"Hi, I'm Morgan and this is my brother Eric," she began, reciting the lines burned into her brain in the same robotic manner she did as a child. "He's very shy. My brother thinks you're _so_ cute."

"Go answer the damn phone." Once his sister was gone he took the opportunity to observe Angela as she looked around the room. She examined pictures left on the walls, books left on the desk, and glanced out the window to inspect the treehouse. "You're making a fantasy come true right now, you know?"

"Oh?"

"Do you know how many times I dreamed of having a girl in my room?"

"It's Morgan's room."

"Not yet." He reached for her hand and pulled her close, wasting no time before he crushed his mouth against hers'. Eric had been waiting all evening to kiss her. "Where the hell were you when I was fifteen," he muttered between kisses.

"When you were fifteen? I was…uh…" She didn't know how he expected her to think now, with his lips on her and his hands wandering under her top. The only thing that kept her from completely losing herself in him was the knowledge that his parents and sister were just downstairs. "I was tw-twelve and…and in seventh grade."

His hands fell from under her shirt to rest on her hips and he held her at arm's length. "Don't say stuff like that."

"What?" The sudden loss of contact was a shock. "What are you talking about?"

"It sounds wrong when you put it that way."

"Put _what_ what way?"

"That you were twelve when I was fifteen. You were in seventh grade and I was a freshman, maybe even a sophomore! It sounds dirty. And not the good kind of dirty, the call the police kind."

Angela was confused as to how they went from making out a few seconds ago to this. "If it makes you feel better I was probably more like twelve and a half."

"Not even a little."

"I don't know what you want. I'm the same age as Cory, a few months younger actually. So however old he was when you shared this room is how old I was."

He took a few steps back and covered his ears. "Ugh, quit talking. You're just making it worse."

"What do you want me to do? I'm stating facts."

"Can you state facts that don't compare you to my brother?"

"I could point out that Morgan's in seventh grade right now but I don't think that would help," she teased.

"Do you want me to fling myself out the window? Because I will, aim for Feeny's little picket fence to break my fall and everything."

"There definitely wouldn't be a need for a sex talk tonight if you did that, depending on your aim at least."

"Thanks for your concern."

"Oh, stop it, you big baby."

"First you torture me and then you call me names? Nice."

"Can I make it up to you?"

"You can try. It won't be easy though."

She turned away from him and looked at the other side of the room. "Which bed was yours'?"

"Huh?"

"Which one was yours'?"

"We switched them around a few times, but usually that one," he said, pointing to the one closest to the door. His heart beat a little faster when she took a seat. A girl on his bed in this room was another fantasy fulfilled. Now she just needed to agree to make out with him in that bed to top it off. "God, you look hot sitting there."

She smiled at him in return. "So how much longer do you figure we have to stick around? Not that I'm not having fun, but this is the first time we've been alone in days."

"Mom's getting dessert out now. Trust me. We don't want to miss that. She baked peanut butter brownies."

"Wow…yum."

"You're welcome."

"For what? She's the one who cooked."

"Yeah, but when she asked me what your favorite dessert was I wasn't sure but said you loved peanut butter cups. So she made peanut butter brownies."

"Thanks for the assist, but I think I'll give your mom most of the credit."

"I can live with that. Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"How did you sneak the duffle bag in?"

"I didn't sneak it."

"Then what did you say when mom asked why you have it?"

"Oh, you mean I wasn't supposed to tell her I'm spending the night with you so we can have the big sex talk and then I get to have all kinds of dirty, bad, naked fun with her son?" She nearly laughed when his eyes bugged out. "No?"

"You did _not_ say that to my mommy!"

Angela hooked a finger through a belt loop on his jeans and pulled him closer. "You don't think she'd appreciate knowing that that we're talking it over first?" She wrapped her arms around his waist and peered up at him with a teasing smile, resting her chin against his abdomen. "It's a testament to good parenting that you're being so responsible."

"I don't think she'd see it like that. To her I'm still five, watch cartoons, eat Cocoa Puffs, and wear Velcro shoes."

"But you still eat Cocoa Puffs and I saw you watching cartoons last week. In fact, you ate the Cocoa Puffs while you watched Bugs Bunny."

"Yeah, but I've been tying my shoes for years."

"Mom wants to know if you guys want- oh jeez!" Morgan stopped in the doorway. "You really have to do that in my room?"

They quickly separated. "One, it's not your room yet. And b, we're just talking, Weasel."

"In that position you weren't going to be 'just talking' for long."

"What do you want?"

"Mom wants to know if you want ice cream with your brownies."

"Um…duh. That's always a yes."

"Angela?"

"No, thank you."

She stared at them for a few seconds. "If you're not downstairs in two minutes I'm coming back up here. I'll even bring some of Josh's dirty diapers to stink you out."

"Get out of here."

"Two minutes."

"We should get down there," Angela said.

"But didn't you hear her? We've got two whole minutes." He sat beside her before he gently pushed her back against the mattress. "Come on, let's use that time to make one more of my fantasies come true."

/

"Are you sure you don't want any more potatoes?"

"No, Mrs. Matth-Amy, I mean. Thank you, though. I have enough leftovers to last the whole weekend."

"At least take some more brownies."

Angela watched, silent as Amy quickly unzipped her bag just enough to shove a baggie of brownies inside.

"There you go, your own stash Eric won't find. I love my son, but he has the biggest sweet tooth I've ever seen."

"Thank you." Did that mean Amy assumed she and Eric would be sharing the rest of the leftovers? "And thank you for having me over tonight. It had been too long since I'd had a home cooked meal."

"I'm just happy we finally got to do this. Don't be a stranger now. You're welcome anytime. Even if it's a night Eric is working, if you want dinner- come on over! There's always enough food. I haven't adjusted to cooking for just a few people yet."

While it was an enjoyable evening, she'd had just about all of the family interaction she could handle for one night. Dealing with it without Eric as the go between? "I'll see what my class schedule looks like and let you know. This is the time of year for pulling all-nighters studying for finals."

"Just bring leftovers if you do come to dinner without me," Eric quipped, coming back into the room. "Are you ready?" She nodded. "Mom, feel free to break into my apartment and cook anytime."

"Or you could come over more often, too, you know?"

"I could, but that would make these visits much less special."

"Watch it or the next time Angela comes over all the pictures are coming out."

"All of them?" That could be dangerous.

"All of them, from newborn to present day- most embarrassing ones included."

He threw his arms around his mother. "I love you, mommy! I'll visit you every day!"

She laughed and shook her head. "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

"Dad, you want me at the store Saturday at three, right," Eric asked his father, who had just come back downstairs after putting Josh in his crib.

"Yep, three's good."

"Remember what I said- commission! I sell more than anyone else."

"We'll see."

"Good night, you two. Be safe."

"Good night, Amy, Mr. Matthews. Thank you again for the invitation."

"It was our pleasure. Remember, don't be a stranger…either of you." She stood in the doorway, watching until they were in the car. "I think that went well," she said to her husband as she closed and locked the door.

"You thought it might go bad?"

"We don't know Angela that well so I wasn't sure. But tonight was a good start. I've got a feeling about them."

He sighed. "Not mother's intuition again."

"I'm usually right about these things. I think this relationship is sticking, at least for the foreseeable future."

Alan nodded. He was skeptical at first, unsure of Eric's ability to maintain a relationship, two jobs, and his classes. Not to mention the couple's withstanding the tension among their group of friends, but it seemed they brought out the best in each other. At the very least she brought out the best in Eric. He didn't know Angela well enough to properly see if his son reciprocated, but it seemed he did.

/

"I'm glad your mom tricked you into giving her my cell phone number so she could talk me into dinner," Angela said as she put her bag into the backseat. "I had fun and I got to eat real food again."

"Sorry you got stuck with the Weasel for a while."

"I wasn't stuck with her. I offered to help her. Why do you call her 'Weasel' anyway? It's not very nice."

"I mean it with love. It's just when she was little she used to find her way into things that were none of her business. She'd just weasel her way in- so, Weasel. I've called her that since she was three or four." They got into the car and buckled their seatbelts. "You have no idea how many times I had to drag her along when I wanted to go to the mall or when I'd take a date to the carnival."

"It sounds like you used her to get those dates so it's only fair that she got rewarded."

"She got rewarded! I bought her candy, won her stuffed animals, and she would steal my stuff constantly. Somewhere she has a nice collection of sunglasses and flannel shirts that used to be mine."

"Well, if you want to do that every once in a while now I won't complain. She can go to a movie with us sometime or when they set up the carnival in the park we can take her."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Or I'll be fine some days if you hang out just the two of you."

"Did she say something?"

"No, I just get the feeling that she misses her big brothers. Maybe you should talk to Cory about that."

He groaned. "Him?" He hadn't had a real conversation with Cory since the dinner party.

"Yes…him."

"Fine, if I have to."

"You do."

"What the hell did you guys talk about up there?"

She shrugged. It wasn't so much that they talked. It was more what she read that gave insight into Morgan's thoughts. "Stuff."

That was too vague for him, but Eric got the feeling he wasn't getting a better answer out of her. "Did you catch what my mom said when we were walking out?"

"Good night?"

"No, she said 'be safe.'"

"So?"

"Normally she tells me to drive safe. Why would she change it? Are you sure you didn't say anything about what we're going to talk about this weekend?"

"It was my conversation starter," she said sarcastically. "I find that talking about sex is the perfect ice breaker for dealing with my boyfriend's parents."

"Fine, stupid question."

"No such thing, but do you really think she was trying to throw out a subtle safe sex message?"

He laughed quietly to himself and started the car. "I'm not sure. To be honest it's a little weird to think about so I'm not going to think about it anymore."

"Sounds like a good plan to me."

Eric was just about to drive off when he saw Mr. Feeny pull into his driveway and get out of his car. "Hey, it's Feeny. We should say hi." He rolled down the window but before he could call out to his mentor Dean Bolander emerged from the passenger side, causing his jaw to drop. "Are you seeing what I'm seeing," he whispered to Angela.

She watched Mr. Feeny and the dean walk hand in hand towards the house with a smile on her face. "They look happy."

"They do, don't they?"

"Yeah." Seconds later the serenity was broken when Eric leaned on the horn. "What are you doing?!"

"Woo-hoo," he shouted, hanging his head out the window. "Go, Feeny!"


	23. Chapter 23

"Where are Jack and Rachel?" While it wasn't exceptionally late, Angela was surprised the apartment was dark and empty when she and Eric got in. Jack and Rachel were the ones who had to be awake in the morning for classes. Every week they lamented their early Friday schedules.

"Double date with Cory and Topanga."

"Really?" They seemed like an odd combination to her. Maybe not Rachel and Topanga, but she couldn't picture Jack and Cory hanging out unless Eric or Shawn were with them.

"His stepdad got passes to some advanced movie screening because he owns stock in one of the big theater chains. It was Rachel and Topanga's idea to double." Eric stopped in the kitchen for a minute to stick their leftovers on his shelf in the fridge. "Why? Wish we would've gone to the movie instead?"

"No, I had fun tonight."

"Good. Me, too."

She trailed behind him, watching as he straightened a picture that hung outside Jack's room. He shut the door to the linen closet and tossed all of the mail into the basket on a side table instead of leaving it scattered around the basket. Typically this disorganization wouldn't faze him. Heck it didn't faze Rachel either if Angela thought about it. Jack was the resident neat freak. "You okay?"

"Yeah, why?"

"No reason." Pointing out his nerves wouldn't help matters. Besides, she would be lying if she said she didn't have her own case of butterflies at the moment. Upon entering his room she smiled when she spotted the new sheets and comforter on his bed. They even coordinated with her new pajamas. She supposed it was like Topanga said: they were trying to impress each other in different ways. "Where should I put my stuff?"

"Oh, here." He took her bag and jacket and set them on a chair. "Do you want water or soda…or something to eat, maybe?"

"No, no food, thanks. I'm still full from dinner. Your mom's a good cook."

"Yeah, it's one of the things I miss most about living at home." He kicked off his shoes and went to his dresser for pajamas. "You know she was serious, right?"

She followed his lead and removed her own shoes. "About what?"

"You can go over there for dinner anytime you want, even if I'm working or buried under homework and books. She will be happy to have you there and it looks like Morgan would be, too."

"I'll think about it."

"Just bring me leftovers."

"I promise."

"I'm going to take a shower. You can watch TV or put on some music- whatever you want. You know where everything is by now." He tossed the remote on his bed.

"Wow, normally you don't run for the shower until after we've been making out for a while," she teased. "This must be a good outfit. And I'm not even wearing the jeans you really like."

He smiled as an image of her in those jeans popped into his head. "Well, no…what I meant was…don't get me wrong, all of your outfits are good outfits, but I've been awake and running around since before seven. Worked the coffee house, went to classes, and worked with my dad."

She wondered if he meant literal running with Jack. One of these days she'd have to try and get a glimpse of him working out. "I hate that you overload your schedule on Thursdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays actually. You cram too much in."

"I do it so we can have Fridays just for us. I love our Fridays."

"I love them, too," she insisted, reaching for his hand. "Do you want me to go back to the dorms and come back tomorrow morning if you're tired and-"

"No, stay. I want you to stay just like we planned. But I'm taking a shower because I was feeling gross even before Morgan threw the dirty diapers at us."

Angela wasn't sure whether to cringe or laugh. She hadn't expected Morgan to follow through on her promise that if they weren't out of her soon-to-be room in two minutes she'd bring in Josh's diapers. Yet, like always, they lost track of time with each other and it turned out the girl was very serious in her threat. "Thanks for shielding me. I didn't take a single hit."

"What kind of guy would I be if I let my girlfriend be taken out by a poop diaper?"

"A shitty one?"

"Ha-ha. And maybe I'm imagining it, but I swear I still smell baby crap, so-"

"Yeah, go shower," she said, pointing towards the door.

Eric held out his arms. "No hug first?"

She took a step back. "Touch me and one of us sleeps on the floor. I'll let you guess which one."

"I just vacuumed, so I won't feel that bad when it's you." He ducked when she tossed a pillow at him. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

/

When Eric got out of the shower he realized he forgot to bring his clothes. Did he go get them? Yell for Angela to bring them to him? After debating for a few seconds he decided to just get them himself. They'd already seen each other in various stages of undress while making out and considering what they planned to discuss later, it seemed silly to get shy now. When he reached his room he saw that Angela was already changed and watching TV.

"Yeah, I bet you regret giving up those two lifelines so early now, buddy," she muttered to the screen while she put her hair in a loose braid.

"Hey, I thought I was the one who talked to the TV. Ooh, it's _Who Wants to be a Millionaire_ night?"

"Isn't every night _Who Wants to be a Millionaire_ night?"

"It seems like it."

"Besides, the guy used two lifelines already and he's only at the $32,000 question. He deserves to be yelled at." She shook her head. "The third lifeline already? Don't be stupid."

He read the question and two possible answers remaining. "It's B right?"

She looked at him for the first time since he came back to the room and realized he was only wearing a towel. "I…it's…what?"

"It's B? You know, when in doubt go with B."

"No, it's C: Dostoevsky."

"I still like B. It makes me think of Toll House cookies or those Toblerone candy bars."

"I'm sure that's the legacy Tolstoy was going for." She intended to turn back towards the TV, but only made it about halfway. "Forget the books."

"Chocolate beats _War and Peace_ any day. I dropped a class freshman year because that was mandatory reading. That sucker's huge. Like…if you hit someone on the head with it you'd kill 'em."

"Why would you hit someone on the head with _War and Peace_?"

"They tried to make me read it? I don't know." After scanning the room for his missing pajamas and boxers, they appeared folded on top of his pillow. He sat down and reached across the bed to retrieve them. Out of the corner of his eye he spotted Angela watching him. "Did the guy guess the right answer?"

"What guy?"

"The dummy who used all his lifelines, did he give the right final answer?"

"I have no idea. The show on this side of the screen was better."

One thing Eric appreciated about their relationship was their openness with their physical attraction for each other. He'd been with girls in the past who would chide him for simply looking at them. Or they got embarrassed if they were caught checking him out. It was dumb to him because if you were with someone, didn't that mean you liked how they looked? He didn't have to worry with Angela. They had no qualms letting the other know how they felt when it came to that. "Wow, I distracted from _Millionaire_? That's a big level of hot."

"Definitely."

She slid over to him with a smile on her face and placed her hands on either side of him, making it impossible for him to move. He closed the minute gap between them and kissed her, putting his hand on the back of her neck to deepen it. When she leaned into him and brought her hands up to his chest warning bells went off in Eric's head. "So I just remembered I'm only in a towel," he admitted with a laugh, reluctantly breaking the kiss. "We should stop before I have to take another shower."

Angela kissed him once more before she pulled away. "Right. Sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry for." He rubbed her leg. "Nice ice cream cones," he teased, running a finger under the hem of her pajamas.

She held up his boxers. "Says the guy with ducks on his underwear."

"Hello: duckies rule! They're the horsies of the sea."

"Wouldn't sea horses be the horsies of the sea?"

"I'm not having this conversation again. Why does no one else understand," he muttered to himself. "The point is ducks are awesome. Deal with it."

She rolled her eyes, but found it impossible not to smile. It was such a bizarre topic to be passionate about. "Just don't make fun of my pajamas."

"I wasn't making fun. I love ice cream! So you and ice cream…two of my favorite things." He snatched his boxers out of her hands as he stood. "I'm going to get dressed. You can have the bathroom when I'm done. Feel free to ogle me as I leave the room."

"Ogle, huh? That thesaurus I got you has really come in handy."

"Indubitably."

/

"I just scared the crap out of Jack," Angela said when she came back into Eric's room a while later.

He laughed. "Cool. How?"

"I came out of the bathroom as he was walking past the door. I didn't know he could jump that high."

"Yeah, poor guy scares easy. It makes Halloween and April Fool's day a lot of fun."

"Be nice to him." She tried to be serious, but it was hard. Jack's reaction had been funny, even Rachel doubled over, hysterical at his jump and shriek.

"Can I ask you something? I get if superhero pillowcases aren't your thing, but did you really have to bring your own? I mean, who doesn't love Batman and Superman?"

She walked over and took the pillow from his hands. "I don't hate your superhero pillowcases. I love them. They're very you. But the silk is better for my hair. This way it doesn't tangle or dry out."

"But I thought that's why you wrapped your hair up in the scarves."

"Yeah, but I don't feel like doing that every night. Plus sometimes they come loose."

"So you don't hate Batman?"

"No, I don't," she reassured him, leaning forward to kiss his cheek. "I'm just trying to protect my hair. Although, why do you still have the superhero pillows if you bought new bedding?" She saw his surprised look. "Yes, I noticed."

"I went to the store and I told the lady to show me the most grownup bedding they had, but it had to be blue and not boring. Because blue is my favorite color and I am not boring."

Angela could almost imagine him going up to some poor, unsuspecting salesclerk in his quest for 'grownup' bedding. "Of course."

"But almost all the full-sized bed stuff that I could afford only came with two pillow cases. And they weren't even normal pillow cases. They have fancy material on the sides."

"Shams."

"For sure, cause I definitely got shammed at that price and no real pillow cases. At least they gave me all the sheets." He got into bed as she was shifting around, trying to get comfortable. "You're still good with sleeping on the left side or do you want to switch?"

"It doesn't matter to me. You just make sure you wake me up or shove me over if I fall asleep on your shoulder again. Don't lay there in pain."

"What pain? There are worse ways to wake up than cuddled with you."

"I'm already in your bed. Quit laying it on so thick."

"Sorry. I guess I'm still not used to actually getting the girl and having it last this long. Part of me is afraid I'll wake up in the morning and find out this was all a dream and you'll be gone. Sometimes I can't shut off that voice in my head that says I have to impress you 24/7 to keep you."

Angela moved over to his side, wrapped her arms around him, and rested her head on his chest. "Well, you got the girl and the only place she's planning to go tonight is to sleep."

"I know."

"And you're not the only one who gets scared. The more serious we get…"

"…the scarier it gets," he finished.

"Yeah."

"But it's a good scary, you know, at least most of the time." Eric ran his hands along her back. "For me it's like being on a roller coaster. I don't know where all the dips and curves are, but I'm screaming my head off and having the time of my life."

She considered how apropos that was. You could be at the highest point and it took very little to upset the car and send you crashing down to earth again. "I think that's the most fitting relationship analogy I've ever heard." Angela held onto him a little tighter. She didn't want to think about what would happen when their car started to freefall. Unfortunately she knew it wasn't a matter of _if_. The highs didn't last forever. She'd been in that car flying down the track too many times to believe otherwise.

"So what the hell do we do when the roller coaster makes us feel like throwing up?"

She rested her elbow on his chest and propped her head up in her hand to look at him. It was comforting to know that he thought about this, too, and wanted to prevent it. "We do what we said we would do when we got together: put our friendship first and never stop talking. If communication goes down we fail."

"Never stop talking."

"Right."

"Let's talk now."

She sighed. "Eric, that's a big talk to have on no sleep."

"No, not the sex talk. Tell me something else, something I don't know about you."

"Like what?"

"Where were you born? I don't think I know that."

Angela lay back down and tucked her head under his chin. It was a question no one else had ever asked before. "I was born in Belgium while my dad was stationed there. We lived there until I was about a year old. After that he was transferred to Spain for two years. I could list all the places I've lived but then we'd be up half the night. You should see my passport."

"That's so cool. I was born in Philly and have never lived anywhere else. I'm boring compared to you."

"It's not boring to have roots."

"Yeah, but I want to travel. I want to see things."

"You should. There's a lot of world out there just waiting. As tough as it was sometimes for me to adjust to new schools I loved getting to explore new places."

"Maybe we can take another road trip this summer," he suggested. "You know, after your visit with your dad is done."

"Where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere. Everywhere. I was thinking we could throw a dart at a map and travel to wherever it lands."

"That sounds like fun. I would love to do that. It's the exact opposite of the way my dad traveled. Now I believe it's my turn to ask a question, find out something about you I don't know."

"Take your best shot."

"What's your favorite place that you've been so far? And no, right here, right now doesn't count."

"There's a spot in the mountains where we go camping, right alongside this lake. It's so beautiful there. If you go in the fall when the leaves are changing it's something else. My favorite time is just after the sun has gone down and the stars are coming out. Combine that with a fire and s'mores- it's perfect."

"Sounds like it."

"I've seen a few shooting stars up there. No one ever believes me, but I see them."

She fought back a yawn and forced her eyes to stay open a little longer. "I believe you."

Somehow, he knew she would. "Thanks."

"I'm jealous. I've always wanted to see one. What do you wish for?"

"Oh, you know…stuff," he said quietly, holding her a little closer.

"You might convince me to go camping one of these days after all." She started to drift off. "I love s'mores and stars."

He kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes. "I know you're almost asleep, but I'm holding you to that."


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As with everything I write, I try to keep it realistic vs. the TV/movie magic version. That includes when characters discuss their relationship/sex. I don't know if I quite hit the tone I was going for with Angela and Eric's talk, but I tried to keep it real. So, no TV cheery, perky, everything is always so special and perfect here.

Angela rolled over in bed, attempting to get away from the sunlight that was robbing her of extra sleep. Instead of Eric, she was met with an empty bed, which woke her up further. She could smell coffee and was torn: sleep or caffeine? Life's necessities taunted her from opposite sides of the spectrum. The choice was all but made for her when she heard the door open.

"Hey, sleepyhead! I got breakfast."

"Coffee," she mumbled, extending her hand.

"Yes, I got that, too," he said, handing over the cup. "I'm not that stupid."

After a few sips of coffee she started to wake up a little. She looked at the clock and saw that it was just after eight. "How long have you been up?"

"Half hour, maybe a bit longer, but not much."

"I was on your shoulder again, wasn't I?"

"It's not a big deal."

"It is if it chases you out of bed. I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it. I was waking up anyway."

"Maybe we should try switching sides next time and see if it happens when I'm on the right. Who knew I'd be such a cuddly sleeper? Between the two of us that seems like a total you move. I'm selectively affectionate. You're a big teddy bear."

"Well then that explains it," he began, as he sat down beside her and rested his head on her shoulder. "I'm so sweet and lovable you can't help but be drawn to me, even in your sleep. I'm that irresistible to you."

"I'm not awake enough to be this cutesy."

He kissed her cheek before he got up and went to the desk. "There's breakfast. It's not fancy, but even I can scramble a few eggs and make sausage."

She accepted the plate and began to eat. "Why are you being this nice?"

"I'm always nice. It's part of that whole sweet, lovable, teddy bear thing I've got going on." He flashed her his best smile. "Remember?"

"Yeah, or you're nervous about the talk."

His grin faded a bit and he took a seat at the desk. "Maybe a little."

"It's just us talking the way we always do. What's so different?"

"It's more personal."

"Why? Because it's about sex?"

"Uhh…yeah! Anything where you get naked is instantly more personal."

"To me all of the conversations we've had where we really got to know each other- even before we were together- that's the real deep down personal stuff."

"But that was just talking."

"No, it was connecting on an emotional level. We bared our souls. I don't know about you, but that doesn't happen for me with most people."

"Me either."

"That doesn't happen with everyone. Sex is… two random people on the street can hook up on any given night and sure, they'd be connecting physically, but it would meaningless in every other way."

"I guess."

"I already know it won't be meaningless for us because we've already connected on all those other levels; emotional, intellectual, spiritual-"

"Spiritual?" He furrowed his brow. "But we've never talked about religion outside of what it means in some paintings."

Angela went over to him and crouched down in front of the chair, her hands on his knees. "Give me a few minutes to brush my teeth and wake up a little more, okay?" He nodded. She stood and kissed him gently. "I'll be right back."

Eric paced the room. Was this some sort of test? Should he have studied? If so, what was the book?

"Hey, you were holding out on me."

He jumped, not having heard the door. "What?"

"There's donuts."

"You said you don't like to eat junk first thing in the morning, that it's a bad way to start the day."

"Yeah, but a little cheat every now and then is fine, especially when it's glazed."

"Are we really going to talk about donuts right now? Because unless you're about to connect with it on a spiritual level-" He was cut off when she shoved half of the pastry in his mouth. "Hey."

"Don't make fun."

Eric swiped her coffee and finished what was left of it. "I wasn't trying to."

"So are we going to keep dancing around this or are we ready to sit down and talk like two mature adults?"

"I'm following you here."

Angela got back into bed and sat up against the headboard. "First, I want to make clear the reason I've wanted to wait, it's not because I don't trust you. That couldn't be further from the truth."

"I know."

"I trust you more than I've trusted anyone in a really long time, maybe ever. This doesn't have anything to do with you. I mean it does, but not the negative stuff. I'm trying to keep the bad away from us by learning where I went wrong." She fiddled with the bracelet she was wearing. She forgot to take it off last night. "I've gone too far too fast with guys before and have only gotten my heart broken. That stuff makes you gun shy even after you're finally in a healthy relationship."

He went over to the bed and sat beside her. "You're not the only one with a past they're trying to learn from, you know? I've made mistakes and I've been hurt before, too. But I also trust you the way I hope you trust me and I want to keep that going."

"So do I."

"Then why does this suddenly feel weird if it's what we both want?"

She wrapped her arms around him and relaxed against his chest. "I think it's just one of those curves you were talking about last night on our roller coaster track."

/

"Are you okay," Angela asked, laughing as he leaned against the headboard with his hand over his eyes.

"Yeah, fine. You're definitely more thorough than any other girl I've dated. We made sure she had birth control and someone brought condoms. That was about it."

"STDs never came up? Or other diseases?"

"Briefly."

"But it's better to be a little uncomfortable now and know we're safe and protecting each other. I've seen firsthand what can happen otherwise. I grew up with this girl, her mom was in the army and every few years it seems we'd be living on the same base. When we were fourteen she started seeing this older guy. He creeped me out but really swept her off her feet. To make a long story short, she got stupid and trusted him to take care of everything and wound up with an STD and baby boy. Instead of her starting college this year, her kid started preschool."

"Okay, I get it. But it still sucks as a conversation ice breaker."

"No argument here. That was never going to be a fun topic to bring up. It needed to happen though. Will you look at me now?" She attempted to pry his hands away from his face.

"Give me a few minutes."

"Okay. If it will make you feel better I'll go first."

"Go first for what?"

"Talking about our pasts, you know? I don't think we need to get into names or give exact numbers. That seems like a dangerous road to go down, but we can talk. I think we should."

"You sure?"

"If there's a question that we really don't feel comfortable answering then we shouldn't, but otherwise, why not?"

"What kinds of questions?"

"I don't know. Just think of something and ask."

Eric removed his hands from his face and finally looked at Angela. They couldn't keep talking like this and _not_ being looking at each other. "I knew I should've studied for this."

"Ask me anything you wouldn't mind me asking you. I'm not going to get upset."

"Fine." He wracked his brain, trying to think up a question. "How old were you your first time?"

"I was sixteen."

"What made him special enough to be your first?"

She sighed and drew her knees up to her chest. "My life was such a mess at the time. Dad was being transferred again and likely deployed to a dangerous area soon afterwards. I had two weeks to decide whether I was going to move to Las Vegas to live with my aunt or come to Philadelphia to stay with my grandmother. If I fought him or refused to make a choice he would decide for me, but it was happening.

"He'd been stationed in Fort Dix for a while so I- don't laugh," she admonished, interrupting her own story. "It's not that funny a name."

"Yeah, it is." He cleared his throat. "Sorry. Keep going."

"As I was saying, he had been stationed there long enough that I was able to make some friends. I had a boyfriend. Dad wasn't crazy about him, but let's be honest, at that age it was only a selling point. It added to the bad boy image."

"So you slept with him before you left for Philadelphia?"

"I know, clichéd and stupid, but the whole time leading up to the move Brandon seemed to be the only one who cared about what I wanted," she explained, not realizing she'd given his name. "Everyone else was making decisions for me. The whole time was just so overwhelming and chaotic. He was a distraction and I clung to him. When he told me he loved me I really believed it. So yeah, we slept together and made promises to call every night and visit every weekend."

"And you never saw him again?"

"No, actually we were able to keep up the visits for about a month."

"What happened?"

"His _other_ girlfriend called me to say she was tired of losing out on weekends with her man. It turns out the second he found out I was leaving he was looking for other ways to keep occupied on base. He had a home girlfriend and an away girlfriend, like we were sports' team jerseys."

Angela still remembered that phone call, how convinced she was it had to have been a mistake or a practical joke. It was as if the wind had been knocked out of her. He had been her anchor when everything else was up in the air. How could he so easily cast her aside?

"Want me to go kick his ass?"

She laughed before leaning forward to kiss his cheek. "I appreciate the offer, but last I heard he enlisted in the army and he was very into martial arts when I knew him. He could probably take you."

"I find your lack of faith insulting. I sleep with my head on superheroes. That means their powers seep into me while I recharge. Plus my dad won silver gloves in his weight class in the Navy. Some of that could be in my genes."

"After all that drama," Angela started, growing serious again, "I decided why bother with relationships? My parents' marriage ended in shambles, my grandmother has never seemed to recover after my grandfather left when my mother was a baby, and I didn't need to get my heart broken repeatedly to learn my lesson."

"Sex with him…it meant something to you, didn't it?"

"I don't sleep with a guy unless I think it's going to mean something. Sometimes I wish I was the kind of person who could do casual hook ups. Life would be so much easier. But I can't. Casual dating, yes, that I can do, but anything more and I need to believe I can trust the guy. Unfortunately it seems my instincts sucked and each time I've had sex with a guy the end of our relationship wasn't far behind.

"I think that's what scares me so much. Sex changes things in a relationship, yeah, but for me it always changes things for the worst. And when you've only been with a couple people and the relationships end more or less the same way…well the specifics were a little different but the timelines add up…you can't help but wonder is it really them? Are they the jerks that only wanted one thing? Or is it me?"

"You're not-"

"Is there something about me that is wrong fundamentally that makes someone want to run screaming in the opposite direction the second they get close to me? Does caring about me, loving me, does it change a person for the worse?" She was surprised to feel the sting of tears in her eyes and did her best to keep them at bay.

Eric had a feeling she was no long talking strictly about romantic relationships. After all, nearly everyone in her life has walked away at some point. He slid over and wrapped his arms around her. Though she returned the hug it was lacking its usual vigor. "There's nothing wrong with you. Anyone who says there is gets the crap kicked out of them."

"I just don't want this to end with me asking myself the same questions about you…us…me…everything. That would kill me."

In that moment he vowed to be different. He never wanted to cause her to question her worth. "Angela, I'm not like that. If I was only in this for the sex I never would've stopped you that first time at your dad's apartment."

"So you've never broken up with a girl right after you slept with her?"

He looked away, unable to meet her eyes.

"Eric?"

"Once."

She pulled back. "Why?"

"I don't know that I have a good answer besides being young and stupid. I thought it was going to be a casual, fun thing but she didn't. She started asking for more from me than I could handle at the time. Instead of being mature and talking about it I bailed."

"Oh." She was quiet, weighing this revelation in her mind. "And it's only happened the one time?"

"Yes. I swear. I was a dumb kid, seventeen and in over my head."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

She nodded. "We're all allowed a screw up. I slept with my boyfriend knowing I was leaving town. Yes, I did it because everything else was so crazy I was focusing on him to keep me centered, but I can't lie. Part of me hoped if we had sex it would up the odds of us staying together. That's a bad reason to sleep with someone- to keep them."

"So you're not going to hold it against me?"

"I don't like it, but you were honest. You could've lied and gotten away with it so easily, but you didn't. I appreciate that. Thank you."

"I don't want to lie to you."

"Good. I don't want to lie to you either."

He nodded. "So is it your turn to ask me questions now?"

"You don't have any more for me?"

"I feel like we'd be getting into weird territory since your last boyfriend was Shawn. I was around when you guys got together and I know how you broke up. I was in the background your whole relationship. Not that I was paying you guys much attention, but I was there. Unless you think there's something I really need to know I don't want details. It's bad enough that I can pretty much assume he broke up with you right after you guys slept together."

"There were other factors involved, but yeah, not long after."

"Right."

"You want to take a break first? Get some coffee or a snack?"

His eyes widened. "You think I feel like eating right before you stick me under the microscope?"

"Not even a donut?"

"Well, maybe one."

She kissed him before vacating the bed. "Be right back."

/

A few minutes later they'd each had donuts and were feeling more relaxed. "Remember our deal. This isn't about knowing specifics. I don't need that information. Any questions that feel too personal or you're not comfortable answering- just say so," Angela reminded him.

"I know, but it's not like I have any secrets or even that many stories to tell."

She squeezed his hand and kissed his knuckles. "It's not a numbers game. Unless...does it bother you that I've been with a couple guys?"

"No. Will it bother you if I say that I've been with a few girls? Well, wait...I wonder if she counts. Would she just be half," he muttered, thinking to himself. "Maybe I should just take her off my list because I doubt she counts me."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Never start fooling around in the back seat after spending all day at the state fair."

"Why not?"

"Because eventually the chili dogs, cotton candy, deep fried everything, and the million and one other things you ate that day- combined with all the rides you went on- will come back to haunt you." Eric closed his eyes in an effort to keep the images of that night at bay. "Who knew the riskiest ride I'd be on that night would be in the backseat of my dad's Impala?"

"Oh, no."

"Yep. We were getting hot and heavy and Melissa was very happy with the giant teddy bear I won for her playing that strength tester game and wanted to show her appreciation. Things were going well, but because we were parked on kind of an incline the car started rockin'...plus it was hot outside and really warm in the car and well...there's no bigger mood killer than going from half naked and making out to half naked and throwing up."

Her hand flew to her mouth. She didn't know whether to be horrified or laugh at the absurdity of it. "You got sick?"

"We both did. I don't know if that makes it better or worse."

"I would think better. You know, the bond of shared embarrassment? You hope it becomes one of those moments you can laugh at later."

"This definitely wasn't one of those moments. Melissa freaked out and refused to ever speak to me again."

"But why? It wasn't anyone's fault."

"She said I got sick first and she was only sick because of me."

"Is that what happened?"

"I honestly don't remember. But she blamed me anyway. You try living that down after word got out."

"I'm sorry." She raised her head and kissed his cheek before settling back on his chest. "Can I ask one more question before I promise to never bring it up again?"

"Sure."

"How did you explain it to your parents when you got home? I can only imagine the condition the car was in if you both got so sick."

"I told them we must've gotten food poisoning from one of the vendors at the fair. I said I'd pay to have the car cleaned from my paycheck working at the grocery store, but they felt so bad for us mom said not to worry about it. Then she sent me to bed and made me tea."

"They bought your story?"

"I thought so at first, but a few days later dad asked me some questions that made me think he knew there was more going on. But he never came out and directly called me on it which was weird for him. I guess he figured the shame was punishment enough."

"I'm sorry."

"That's okay. I'm over it. Of course, I had almost forgotten all about it until tonight, so thanks for the reminder," he ended sarcastically.

"I promise I will never mention it again."

"Thank you. But you owe me an embarrassing sex story at some point- if one exists. If one doesn't...I promise I will do my best to not give you one to tell later when we finally-"

"Oh, I can take care of the embarrassing story right now. It's a make out story, but still. I was seeing this guy named Mike and he asked me to keep him company while he babysat his little brother. He said the kid would be sleeping by the time I got there."

Eric nodded. "Use the younger sibling- classic move. Hell, if we weren't together I'm sure I would've found a way to use baby Josh eventually...probably pretend he was mine or something pathetic like that."

"I was too young and stupid to see that Mike was using a move back then. Anyway, we're fooling around on the couch and I see something out of the corner of my eye. His seven year old brother was standing there just watching us. I say something and he tries to play it off as the kid sleepwalking and wants to keep going."

"Seriously? Creepy."

"I know! Needless to say the night was over for me and I left. Don't ask me why, but I was dumb enough to go back the next day because Mike said he wanted to take me to an early movie to make up for our night being ruined. Before we could get out of the house the kid asked- in front of their parents- why we were wrestling on the couch last night." She realized he was trying not to laugh. "It's okay. It's funny to me now."

"What did his parents say?"

"They put the blame all on me and I was banned from the house for attempting to seduce their innocent oldest son and for corrupting the precious younger one."

"Wow."

"I dodged a crap ton of crazy there."

"For the record, I am all for being seduced and corrupted by you."

"I thought you were the one corrupting me?" They laughed.

"I guess there's no harm in corrupting each other from time to time."

"It's more fun that way. If you don't mind a bad segue, how old were you the first time you were...corrupted?"

"I was sixteen like you were."

"What made the girl special enough to be your first," she asked, mirroring his earlier question.

"She was hot and had a pulse. Plus she thought I was hilarious, which was a major turn on."

"That's it?"

"I didn't need anything else. She invited me over to her house to watch movies while her parents were out for the night. We had the whole place to ourselves."

"Any regrets?"

"I'm not sure. I was a teenage guy hopped up on hormones and my girlfriend wanted to have sex with me. That was all I needed to know. Was I ready? Hell no, but at the time I thought I was.

"We broke up a few weeks after that. I don't remember who initiated it, but I know it was the most confused I've ever been after a break up. It took longer to get over her and I remember thinking about her a lot and not understanding why when no other break-up felt like that before."

Angela appreciated his candor. "When was the first time it meant really something for you?"

"Her name was Irene."

"Long term relationship?

"No, it was just a weekend thing."

"How could you get that serious about someone during a weekend?"

"Cory and I were on our way back home after a summer road trip and she was a waitress in Pottstown, home of the world's largest yogurt cup. They also had the parade of sprinkles and dancing spoons. I thought it was the most awesome place."

"Tell me what made Irene so special."

"I think it was more what she represented. Right before the road trip I found out I didn't get into any of the colleges I'd applied to. I was scared to death. I didn't have anything to look forward to. My friends were all gone and moved away for school and I was trapped by my own stupidity. My future was this big, empty nothingness. I was afraid to come back and face that. The closer we got to home the more I tried to drag out the trip. That's how we wound up detoured in Pottstown.

"Irene was sweet, pretty, and seemed just as stuck and scared as I was. Everyone there was nice. They were super impressed with me because I was from the big city. I had a few ideas to help them promote their diner and they treated me like a genius, like I was special. I could've been king. No one else treated me like that and it made it very easy to want to stay forever.

"They had predictable lives. They did the same thing day after day. I liked that...the safety, especially at that point when I had nothing going for me." He ran his hand along Angela's back. "If I had stayed I would've been happy for a while." His dad's words from that day echoed in his head. "But I would've been settling...settling because I was afraid to take a chance and fail again."

"What happened to her?"

"I drove back there a few weekends, but...I don't know what happened. She told me to not to come back anymore. I think she thought I rejected her and her way of life when I went home. Which is nuts because she talked about how she might like to get out of that little town and do something, even just a vacation."

"Did she?"

He shook his head. "I took a drive not long after that first night we ran into each other at the museum. Something about our talk inspired me to take a chance and see how Irene was doing. She was wearing a wedding ring and had a huge stomach- married a local and still working in that diner. She said she was happy, but I don't know if I believe her. The smile did not reach her eyes."

"Maybe she was just tired. I imagine being on her feet and waiting tables while heavily pregnant would do that."

"I hope so. We may have just been a fling but she deserved to be happy. I'd hate to think she's stuck somewhere she doesn't want to be...especially if she trapped herself when she's still so young. That's not a way to live your life."

"Ever wish you would've stayed in yogurt town?"

"Pottstown," he corrected. "I don't know. Before you, when school was driving me nuts, yes, sometimes I thought about how easy it would be but I would've been settling. It would've been fake happiness because I was afraid and hiding from real life." He leaned down for a kiss. "I'm much happier now- real happy, not fake happy."

She smiled. "Glad to hear it."

Eric waited for her to say something else, but she didn't. "So what now?"

"What do you mean?"

"Now what happens? I told you I'm following your lead here. We covered diseases, various methods of protection, our pasts-"

"Nothing's happening today."

"I didn't mean for it to sound like I was pressuring you to pick a day. I'm not."

"I know you well enough to know you wouldn't pressure me."

"Out of curiosity, now that we've had this talk, how will we know when we're ready?"

"I'm not sure. I think it's one of those things where we'll just know when it feels right." He nodded. "But there is something else we need to cover."

"What's that?"

"Sex itself."

"What about it?"

"We both have to be prepared for the fact that it might not be…that the first few times…"

"Come on, spit it out."

"It might be awkward."

"Say what?"

"Or even not all that great."

"Goody, and I was worried we maxed out all the embarrassing moments talking about STDs. Why don't you just say it will be over real quick, too? Really put it over the top."

"Well…"

"Oh, my, god!" He threw the comforter over his body and curled up in the fetal position.

"Eric, get out of there."

"No! This is where I live now."

"Seriously?"

"Here's a tip, if a guy ever jokes about something like that, you never _ever_ agree with him. Even if his life depends on that agreement, you let him die. At least he would go out with some dignity."

She sat beside the blanketed mass that was her boyfriend and rested her hand against his back. "The first time is a freebie."

"With such low expectations I certainly hope so." He stuck his head out from under the blanket. "I don't understand. It's good when we make out, right? I thought it was good. It's always hot."

"It's amazing. It's not easy for me to have to stop things in the middle either. I want it, too."

"Then wouldn't that translate to decent sex? Good even?"

"Sex is a little different than making out. It's new territory for us as a couple. We'll be getting to know each other in new ways. Plus I don't know about you, but it's been a while for me."

"Yeah, me, too."

"That's something else. We're a little out of practice. I'm not saying it will be awkward, just that it might be."

He exhaled and stared up at the ceiling. "But now when we're doing it I'm going to feel like you're judging me. And when we're done you'll just be… _eh_ …"

"No, not at all. Would you rather be having this conversation now or do you wish I waited until after we already had sex?"

"If you waited until after we had sex to call it awkward I'd never be able to look at you again. I'd have to move away and change my name. I feel like doing that anyway."

She cuddled up alongside him. "How do you think I felt after I found out about you and ears?"

"This is revenge because I can't stand kissing ears or have anyone kiss mine?"

"No, I-"

"I can give it another shot. I told you, it's that one girl's fault. She had about thirty piercings in each ear but didn't take care of them and they were gross and infected but she still wanted me to-"

She clapped her hand over his mouth. "I don't need to hear that story again. The point is you didn't tell me. I thought I was doing something that turned you on. Instead it disgusted you. I felt stupid because I misread your cues."

"I thought you were into it so I tried to get over my issue."

"I can live without ears coming into play. I don't get the hype either. But the point is you dragged out a situation that could've been fixed in five seconds if you just told me what you didn't like."

Eric sat up and shrugged the blanket off. "Fine, I get it. New equals awkward, but can you not sound like you know it will be terrible?"

"That's not what I think at all. I just think want us to be prepared for it to not be perfect. TV and movies do lie, you know? You're not the only one afraid of not meeting expectations."

"Are you kidding?! You-you're…wow. Do you think I run off to take cold showers for show? I don't. Cold showers aren't fun."

"Sorry we had this conversation," Angela asked after neither one of them said anything for a while.

"Yea-no…No, I'm not. But next time we need to have a big, honest conversation do you think you could do it gradually instead of dumping it on my head all at once?"

"That was a lot to take in, wasn't it?" She took his hand and laced their fingers together, relieved when he held on just as tight as she did. "To be fair I didn't know it was all going to spill out like that. I talked, you reacted, and we were off."

"I know I get dramatic sometimes."

"Sometimes?"

"But look at it from my point of view. You basically put all this pressure on me for our first time to not be a big, giant fail."

"That's not what I'm doing. Or it's not what I'm trying to do."

"It's what it feels like."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to feel that way. " She leaned her head against his shoulder. "I don't want to disappoint you either."

"Impossible. You're you. You're awesome."

"Thank you. The feeling is mutual. I think you're awesome and it's impossible for you to disappoint me."

"I'll try to remember that."

"And you know, I don't think we'll have a problem. Nothing between us has ever been bad."

"At least you're optimistic," he said sarcastically.

"Stop it. There is a bright side to this."

"What's that?"

"We can talk about uncomfortable and embarrassing stuff and know we can handle it. No one ran away."

"I hid under the blanket. That's not handling it."

"But you talked from under the blanket. That counts. We just have to make sure we keep talking. This is just the kind of stuff we were talking about last night."

"Yeah, but I didn't know the roller coaster was going to dip and make me want to throw up so soon."

"Was it really that bad?"

"No." He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. "No, it wasn't. You're right. We need to be able to talk about this stuff no matter how embarrassing it is."

"It wasn't easy for me either, but I want us to be honest. I want this to be different from our past relationships."

"I do, too."

"Great. What do you want to do right now?"

Eric peered down at her from the corner of his eye. "The truth?"

"Of course."

"I really need to get out of this room for a while."

Angela burst out laughing at his response. "I think that's a good idea. You want to try the new restaurant that opened around the corner?"

"Sure. Jack and Rachel went there a few nights ago. They liked it. The stir-fry is supposed to be great."

"Cool."

"And could we not talk? Or at least not talk about anything important? My brain is tapped out on deep and meaningful conversation."

"You want to get a table in the window and make up fake life stories for random people walking down the street?"

He smiled at her. "I love that you know me so well."


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay with this one. Real life has been very demanding lately.

"You and Rachel already slept together, right?"

"What?" Jack was so thrown by Eric's question he nearly tripped over a section of uneven sidewalk. "What did you say?"

"You heard me."

"Yeah, I heard you. Did you hear you?"

"I asked the question, didn't I?"

"Are you sure you really want to hear about me and Rachel? You did like her at one point."

"It didn't mean anything. It was the competition that was the fun part. If you don't want to answer you can just say so." He picked up his pace a little bit and ran ahead.

Jack ignored the beginnings of a cramp in his side and hauled ass to catch up. "No, it's not that. I just didn't want it to be weird for you."

"I'm fine."

"All right. Yeah…yeah we slept together already."

"Did you guys talk about it first?"

"Not exactly. Okay…not at all. It happened really fast." When Chet died everyone was naturally more concerned about Shawn, even Jack. His own grief was an afterthought. Then one day Rachel asked him how he felt, how he was taking it. One minute she was comforting him and the next they were making out on the couch. After that they were in a bedroom- he can't remember if it was his or hers'- fumbling with clothes and falling into bed. "Why? Does this have something to do with you and Angela?"

"She's wanted to wait to have sex until we talked about it and we talked last week."

"Wait a minute. You guys haven't had sex yet?"

"Nope."

"Then what the hell is all the noise coming from your room?"

"We know how to have a good time even when we're making out and visiting all the bases," he bragged, a smirk on his face. "We're very good at all of it."

"Ugh. Shut up. I don't need mental images." He shook his head. "But I don't get it. She's been sleeping over a lot lately."

"Yep… _sleeping_. I kind of like it actually. It's nice having her there when I wake up in the morning. I like the random conversations we have before we fall asleep, too. I've learned the most interesting stuff about her during those little talks."

"Like what?"

"She was born in Belgium and because of her dad being in the military the only continent she hasn't been to is Antarctica. She hasn't lived on all the others, but she's at least visited. She showed me her passport."

"That's cool."

"I know, right? I found out there's this cruise line that takes you to Antarctica. Did you know that was a thing?"

"No."

"How cool would it be if I could take her there one day, give her Antarctica? Don't get me wrong, it's probably going to be at least ten or fifteen years before I can even afford to have them send me the brochure, but-"

"Whoa, don't you think you should slow down a little? You guys have only been together for a couple months and you're already planning romantic cruises and talking ten and twenty years in the future?" It wasn't a surprise to him that Eric had fallen hard and fast. In fact, it was fairly typical of him. Granted his previous relationships never made it far, but for those couple of weeks he was fully committed. Though things with Angela seemed more serious and she appeared to be as into Eric as he was to her, at least as far as Jack could tell. "It's a little fast, isn't it?"

"They're just ideas. But we've got a trip planned for the summer anyway so it's not like we could take a cruise then even if I could afford it."

He slowed as they approached the fountain at the edge of the park. When they reached the bench he sat down and chugged his Gatorade. The cramp he'd been trying to ignore was stronger now. "Where are you going this summer?"

"Who knows? Could be Florida, Montana, Alaska, Colorado, or-or…or any place else we can get in my car. We're going to throw a dart at a map and take a road trip. It's probably not happening until July though, maybe August. Her dad is supposed to be in town for a couple weeks in June so we have to wait until after his visit."

"Angela's okay with something that unplanned and spontaneous with you? She always seemed like a planner."

"Yeah, she likes a plan, but she's not psycho about it. She knows when she's with me anything can happen."

"And she likes that?"

"She loves it."

"Okay, great, but I'm still confused."

"About what?"

"What does any of this have to do with me and Rachel and you wanting to know if we already had sex? You wanting to know- still weird, by the way."

"I just wanted to know if you talked about it first. Are most girls as thorough as Angela or did she just go that extra mile? Because no other girl I've been with was like this."

"What exactly did you guys talk about?"

"First we started with birth control, condoms, and other forms of protection- standard stuff."

"Okay."

"Then there was the delightful detour into STD-land."

"Fun."

"I'm just glad she didn't break out one of those books from high school health class that had all the pictures. I wouldn't have been surprised if she did."

"Those were disgusting."

"Then we talked about our pasts. That was okay and not as bad as I thought it was going to be, but still weird because of her history with Shawn. And now I know about the time right before they broke up and it just makes me want to kill him. I'm sorry," he apologized, prompted by the look on Jack's face. "I know he's your brother, but he hurt her so bad and I want to hurt him for it. I've known him a long time, but nothing I've learned about him lately is good, at least when it comes to Angela."

"I know. He screwed up bigtime with her. No argument from me there. But I can't hold it over his head forever. I have to hope he'll make better choices that improve his life, you know? You'd do the same if it was Cory."

"I'm not thrilled with Cory right now either, but yeah, sure."

"Maybe we can just agree to not talk about him?" He wasn't sure how realistic it was. Shawn was sure to come up again at some point. "Call a truce? For now anyway?"

"I guess."

There was a silence neither one of them was sure how to fill. Eventually Jack spoke again. "So what else did Angela say that has you rattled?"

"Rattled? What do you mean? I'm not rattled."

"If you're still thinking about your conversation after however many days something must be bugging you. Come to think of it, you have been a little lost in your own head for the past few days."

"I have?"

"Do you need a reminder of how many orders you mixed up at the coffeehouse just yesterday alone?"

He sighed. "No."

"Or how you brought up all the stupid, crazy ideas you haven't mentioned in months to get customers their orders faster- roller blades, skateboards, human slingshots?"

"I get it! I'm a little off my game lately."

"What gives?"

"Angela said she wants us to be prepared for the first few times being…not all that great."

"What?"

"But she said it's not a big deal, the first time especially, because supposedly that's a freebie. It's okay if it's weird or awkward or-or…or not great and over real quick."

"She didn't."

"Yes, she did."

"What the hell's the matter with her? Like a guy isn't under enough pressure already!"

"I know!"

"What did you do?"

"I did the mature thing and hid under my blanket."

"Seriously?"

"Would you be able to look at a girl that just said that to you?"

"I'd have pulled a Forrest Gump and started to run. Hell, I'd still be running."

"Thanks, that helps me a lot," he said, his voice thick with sarcasm. "But you know Angela can't be the only girl who thinks this way."

"What?"

"She's just the only one smart enough- or dumb enough, haven't decided yet on that- to say it out loud."

"I don't know what you're getting at."

"She said it might take a little bit for things to be comfortable between us…for it to be good. That's normal apparently."

"Okay…"

"I've been with some girls, not a lot but some."

"And?"

"What if I was never with any of them long enough for it to get good? I mean I usually had fun, but what if they didn't and just didn't say anything?"

It was all Jack could do to stop himself from flashing back to previous partners and retroactively gauging their reactions. _Damn you, Angela._

"It's making me paranoid," Eric continued. "Whenever we've been near each other since then I can't shut my brain off. What if every kiss and every time I touch her is being stored in her brain for grading later? Is she going to give me notes with tips on how to improve? Or is it going to be like the Olympics and she just holds up my score?"

'Time to reign the conversation back in,' he realized. "You're really overthinking this. I can't believe I'm saying this to you of all people, but get out of you head, man. Live in the moment and enjoy it."

"I really care about her. This is the best relationship I've ever been in. I don't think I've ever been this happy."

"I don't know if I've ever seen you this happy, and that counts the day you were the thousandth customer at the taco place and got us free tacos for three months."

He smiled at the mention of that. It was supposed to be free tacos for a year, but they got greedy, eating the cuisine for breakfast, lunch, and dinner multiple times a week to save money. It wasn't long before the restaurant cut them off. "Hey, they still have our pictures up on their wall of fame."

"That's not a wall of fame. That's a _'these idiots took advantage of us and even when they pay, can't have more than five tacos a piece'_ warning."

"Still…people know us."

Jack leaned to one side to stretch, relieved to no longer feel the cramping any longer. "Just keep doing things with Angela the way you guys have been. That seems to be working for you so far."

"I just don't want to screw this up. She-I mean-my life makes so much more sense with her in it."

"Yeah, you make more sense to the rest of us now, too. Who knew all we needed was to find you a girl to act as an Eric-to-world translator?"

Instead of responding Eric checked the time and started to run again. He already knew his behavior for the past year or so was a bit out there. Whenever he thought he'd moved past that there would be a joke, wisecrack, or snide remark. But he couldn't get mad at them, could he? He did bring it on himself. Still, it hurt that most people appeared to believe that the idiot was the real Eric and they were just waiting for him to fall back into that mode.

"Hey," Jack shouted, confused when Eric took off without a word. He hurried to catch up. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, just noticed the time. I have to open the store for my dad in an hour. Then I have a couple classes and close up the coffee house tonight. Tomorrow's the same just flip fop the store and coffee house." He yawned almost in anticipation of an exhausting few days. He didn't mind stacking his midweek as it meant he had Fridays free to spend with Angela. But he couldn't wait for summer and for the load to lighten just a little.

"I'll trade you. I have a test in two hours."

"You studied, didn't you?"

"Yeah, but it's Professor Roche. All her tests have essay questions and she docks you ten points if you miss a comma."

"It is an English class."

"Shut up." They ran quietly for a few minutes. "I'm bringing Rachel to New York with me when I go up for Mother's Day weekend."

"Really? Things are that serious?"

"I don't know. But she's bummed about not being able to see her mom and my mom's dying to meet her. So what better time, right? And my sister wants to know who would willingly put up with me," Jack added, rolling his eyes.

"I agree with Alyssa. You are a pain."

"Whatever."

"And for the record, I still think delivering orders on rollerblades could work."

/

/

"…so x must equal 3," Angela muttered to herself, scribbling notes onto the paper. She flipped to the back of the book and checked the answers of her practice test. Satisfied with the results, she put her books away to join Eric in the Student Union while he closed up. She was almost out the door when her phone rang. The number that flashed across the caller I.D. made her sigh. For a few seconds she considered not answering, but picked it up right before it went to voicemail.

"Hi, Nan." She lay back on her bed. "That's okay. You didn't interrupt anything. I just finished studying." She twirled strands of hair around her fingers as her grandmother lamented her lack of contact. "Yes, I know I was supposed to call you back. I'm sorry. Things have just been so busy and… dinner next Wednesday? Oh, I don't know, I don't think I can…would Thursday work instead," she found herself asking. Maybe it would just be easier to get this visit over with. At the very least it would end these pointless phone calls. "Six o'clock? Great. I'll see you then. My boyfriend? Um…I'll let you know. I have to check with him and see what his schedule looks like. He's working two jobs right now in addition to his classes." She knew Eric would be there for her if she asked, but did she want to involve him in this complicated family drama? "No, I'm not with Shawn anymore, remember? We broke up when college started. Eric and I have been going out for a couple of months. Right, he's the one who drove me to see my dad." She listened as her grandmother continued to talk. "Yes, he's good to me and treats me very well. He's sweet, funny, and kind. Eric makes me happier than I've been in a long time. You don't have to worry about that." Angela smiled when she talked about her relationship. She couldn't help it. "Hopefully he can make it on Thursday so you can see for yourself. You don't have to worry. He's not a picky eater. Just make sure there are tater tots and he'll be in heaven. Okay, I love you, too, Nan. Goodnight."

Now all she had to do was not lose her nerve and cancel the dinner before next week.

/

Eric locked the exterior doors. The last of the students had finally left for the night. He still had to clean up, but at least he got to spend a little bit of alone time with Angela.

"Damn it."

He walked over to where she was standing at the pool table, cue in hand. "What's wrong?"

"I scratched. I was on a pretty good streak, too."

"I know. I was watching."

She smirked before she dropped the cue to the table and turned around to face him. "See anything you liked?"

"The way you got the ball from one end of the table into the pocket all the way at the other end with the stick thingy…impressive."

"Very funny." She wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him closer. "With that professional terminology I'm guessing you play a lot."

"Not since the big Eight Ball Championships in Mexico City."

"Huh?"

"I won the Grand Master in the sixties."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

He moved away from her, picked up the cue, and randomly hit the balls around the table. "Senior year there was this girl I liked but she was only into jocks because she wanted to be with a winner."

"Sounds like a gold digger in training to me," Angela remarked.

"I don't know about that, but I lied and told her I was some big world pool champion. It was easy to trick her because she didn't follow pool."

"And she believed that you won in 1960-something?"

"Yeah."

"She thought this even though you obviously weren't alive at the time?"

"Brains weren't up there on my list of priorities in high school. I just wanted pretty. And she was. Of course, now I couldn't pick her out of a line up but-"

"Eric, you're rambling."

"Anyway, she wanted to watch me play and I had never picked up a stick thingy-"

"Cue."

"Right-cue- in my life."

"What did you do?"

"I did what any rational person would do- played Frankie Stecchino for hours. Neither one of us sunk a single shot."

She chuckled. "God, that sounds hilarious in a really pathetic way."

"Oh, it was painful. But I take pride in the fact that he walked away first. Yes, that's right," he gloated, "the history books will show that Frankie the Enforcer walked away from me, Eric Matthews. I mean sure, he _said_ he had church choir practice, but I could smell the fear."

"So what you're saying is you can't play?"

"I pulled off a pretty cool trick shot once, with no witnesses naturally, but nope, can't play." He put down the cue and went back over to her. "I probably shouldn't even be allowed in the same room as a pool table I'm that bad."

"I could teach you if you want. I'm no 60's Mexican Grand Champion," she said in an exaggerated tone, making him smile, "but I can hold my own."

"Who taught you?"

"The summer I turned nine, my dad came home early from deployment. He'd been wounded. It's the only time I ever remember him coming home hurt." Angela reached for his hand and leaned into him. Even years later she hated to think of her father banged up and bruised. "He couldn't get around well the first couple weeks but needed to do physical therapy to keep moving and help his injuries heal. We started with ping pong and moved up to pool. There was a recreation center on the base and I swear we spent the whole summer hogging the tables. I'm not going to pretend we got to be great or anything, but it was a lot of fun. And I felt so grown up and mature because the doctors made a big deal out of me playing with him and how it was helping him heal. They even gave me a special notebook to chart his progress."

"That's neat."

"I hated to see my dad hurt but I love getting to spend all that time with him. And my mom, too, I suppose," she added after a moment. "That was our last summer before she took off."

"I'm-"

"Don't say sorry," she interrupted. "It's not your fault."

"I know. I still am though." He kissed her temple. "You deserve better."

"Yeah, well, life isn't fair and doesn't always give us what we deserve. If it did all moms would be like yours'."

"You know you can borrow her for mom stuff whenever you want, right? I told you that. She'd love it. She lives for that stuff."

"Thanks, but I've been getting by without a mom just fine."

There was an edge in her voice that wasn't there a minute ago. He thought back to their trip to the mall the other day. The stores were plastered with promotions for Mother's day, which was right around the corner. They couldn't even turn on the radio without a commercial reminding you to take mom out to brunch at one of the seemingly hundreds of restaurants offering specials. Angela tried to act normal, like it didn't bother her, but he could tell that it did. "Anything I can do?"

"Can we not talk about moms? Although…I guess this is sort of mom related."

"What is it?"

"My grandmother called again."

Eric was quiet, waiting for her to continue.

"It was more of the same: she wants to talk, says she has something important to tell me. I told her I'd have dinner with her next Thursday."

"Really? That's good."

"You think? Because I have to be honest, ever since I got off the phone I've been fighting the urge to call her back and cancel."

"Why?"

"It's hard for me to want to associate with someone who sees my mother. I know it's her daughter but I still feel betrayed. Nan must've felt bad about it on some level, too, because she hid their contact from me for so long. I only found out when I overheard a phone call."

"I wish I knew the right thing to say, but I got nothing."

Angela laughed quietly before kissing his cheek. "That's okay. I wasn't looking for you to fix it. I'm just venting. I wish things didn't have to be so complicated between us. I know it's hard to tell, but I do miss Nan. She's a good person, a lot of fun, too. I think you'd like her a lot."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"Oh-oh, no, that's not what I meant. You don't have to. Nan said I could bring you, but your schedule is packed Thursdays and-"

"Do you want me there?"

"Yes." She liked to think that she was completely self-reliant and hated to admit she needed anyone, even her boyfriend. "Please."

"Done." He stood directly in front of her. "What time?"

"Six. But what about your dad? You close the store with him Thursdays."

"He can get Cory to do it. He's always whining about not having enough money for life with Topanga after the wedding. You'd think he would do something about that besides only occasionally helping at the store, but…" In the midst of his rant, Eric noticed Angela was staring at him, an odd look on her face. It wasn't a smile, but she didn't look unhappy. "What?"

She thought she'd be used to Eric's selfless behavior where she was concerned, but it always surprised her how willing he was to simply be there when she needed him. Whether it was sacrificing his Spring break so she could see her dad or letting her sleep over to avoid tension in the dorms- he never hesitated. She'd do the same for him. At least she hoped she would. He hasn't needed her to return the favor yet aside from extra study sessions and help with homework. But studying seemed so small compared to what he's done for her. "You're really rearranging your schedule just for me?"

"I want to be there."

"But you didn't even think about it."

"Don't need to. What's the point of being in a relationship if we're not going to have each other's backs? You'd do the same if it was the other way around and I needed you, right?"

"Of course," she said without hesitation.

"See? Bigtime perk to being us. We're there for each other and you appreciate my crazy."

"You're not crazy. I hate it when you call yourself crazy because I know you don't mean the fun kind."

"Have you taken a poll recently? People don't like some of my ideas to liven up things around here."

"I don't give a damn what other people think. Last time I checked you claimed not to either. You know, I read a quote the other day and it made me think of you."

"What is it?"

"It's credited to Nietzsche, but no one can prove he said it."

"And what does this Nacho guy's maybe quote have to do with me?"

"The quote is believed to be, _"And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music."_ "

"Is that a classy way of saying I'm insane?"

"No! It's…for as long as I've known you, even before I really knew you, you did things your own way. No matter what anyone else thought you were up there doing your thing."

"I don't get it."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and closed the gap between them. "What I'm saying is you're not up there dancing alone anymore. I can hear your music now. We can dance together."

He smiled, not quite sure how to react. "That's either the strangest or sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me."

"Can't we go with sweet?"

"Sure." Eric leaned forward for a kiss. He intended for it to be quick. He did have to finish cleaning up after all. But when he attempted to pull away Angela grabbed at his shirt in an effort to keep him close. Not that she had to try very hard. "The dishes," he whispered against her lips.

"They're not going anywhere."

/

"So how did you get out of being dragged to Atlantic City with dad to see grandma for Mother's day," Cory asked Eric. It was a few days later and they were in the Student Union. "He said it was going to be me, him, Morgan, and Josh."

He gathered empty mugs and plates onto a tray and handed it to Jack behind the counter to stick in the dishwasher. The Sunday morning rush was over, but there were plenty of people in and out, seeking caffeine to fuel their studies. "Too many requested off here that weekend. Plus someone has to check in on the store when dad's in Atlantic City."

"And you're the responsible person for that job," he asked, skeptical. Seconds later, he grabbed his calf. "Ow!"

"Sorry," Angela said in a tone entirely too sweet to be natural. "My foot slipped."

He waited until Eric was out of earshot and delivering orders to other students before he loudly whispered, "liar!"

"Be glad it was only your leg. There are plenty of more unfortunate places my foot could wind up."

Cory quickly vacated the couch and moved to a table. A few minutes later Topanga came in, her arms laden with magazines and a date book. "Good morning, darling. You want to come with me to Atlantic City and save me from mind-numbing boredom?"

"If that's your way of asking me to elope, don't tempt me. I might actually say yes."

"No, I have to go to see Grandma Bernice for Mother's day."

"Sorry, I'm going to Hershey with Aunt Pru. We're meeting up with my mom and Precious Pearl."

"Who's Precious Pearl," Jack asked from behind the counter.

"My grandmother."

"Her parents named her Precious Pearl? Okay, I guess it's no wonder Topanga didn't seem like a stretch for your parents."

She rolled her eyes. "Her name is Pearl. She hated all of the grandmother-type names and since pearls are considered precious…do I have to paint you a picture?"

"No, thank you."

"If you're done making fun of my family and our names could, you please get me the biggest coffee you can make? We're talking world record breaking." Topanga sighed and slammed the books down onto the table.

"What's wrong honey," Cory asked.

"I'm so over wedding stuff and we haven't even gotten into the meat of the planning yet. The hall we like the best is completely booked for next summer. They have a couple of openings in March and April but I'm not getting married one day and have to take an honors trigonometry test the next."

"Yeah, homework would take all the fun out of a honeymoon." He picked up the date book from the stack and skimmed all of the free dates available. "I suppose we could get married over Spring break and then take a proper honeymoon over the summer."

"No, it won't feel real then. It's not what we've been planning."

"Okay, then we've got to go back to one of the other halls we liked."

"But I love this one." She pouted. "I'm tired of searching."

"When you think about it who is a wedding really for anyway," Angela pondered, looking up from her book. "It's supposed to be about two people who love each other making a lifetime commitment. Everything else is just for show. All you need is the bride, the groom, and the person performing the ceremony. That sounds like an ideal wedding to me. Because, really, what else matters? So do it. Go and elope."

"Didn't you say last summer that they were stupid for running away when we all thought they were eloping," Shawn asked. He had entered the coffee house and was going to leave when he saw Eric and Angela, but couldn't help but call her out on her hypocrisy.

"It wasn't eloping that I called stupid," she clarified. "It was the running away part. Running away isn't something mature adults do. Scared little children are the ones who run away."

He wondered if that was a shot at his previous behavior, but he didn't get a chance to question her. Someone flew past him and into the room so fast they nearly knocked him over. He didn't realize it was Rachel until she spoke.

"Jack Hunter you have some explaining to do."

"Psst, Rach," Eric interrupted, "if you're going for a Ricky Ricardo impression you've got to say it like-"

She whipped around and pointed a finger at her friend. "Do I look like I'm in the mood right now?"

He took a seat on the arm of the couch beside Angela. "Sorry."

Jack stayed behind the counter, realizing it was likely the safest place for him at the moment. Rachel was pissed. That much was clear. He wracked his brain and tried to think of what he could've done to upset her so much, but came up empty. She didn't even react like this after she found out about his and Eric's bet. "Hi, honey." All eyes in the coffee house, not just of their friends, were watching them.

"Don't 'hi, honey,' me. Your mom called a little while ago."

"And?"

"She wanted to tell me how much she was looking forward to me spending Mother's day with your family and how excited she was to meet me. Apparently the guest room is already fixed up and waiting. Because, you know, we're not married so she hopes I understand that we sleep in separate rooms while there."

"All right that had to be an awkward conversation and I'm sorry, but-"

"When were you going to tell me about this? And where do you get off making plans for me without discussing it with me first?"

"You're the one who said it would be fun to go to New York to meet my parents and sister and see a show or eat at one of the famous restaurants."

"Yes, for a day trip, not the whole weekend. And Mother's day weekend to boot? No pressure on me there," she said sarcastically.

How had he messed this up so spectacularly? "Look, I'm sorry, okay. I'll call mom later and tell her it was a misunderstanding and that you're not coming to-"

"Sure, make me the bad guy. Make her think I don't want to meet her."

"I guess I assumed that-"

"Yeah, you're right that you _ass_ umed."

Angela looked down when her phone rang. She frowned when she saw it was her dad. "Weird."

"What," Eric asked.

"Dad doesn't usually call me until later in the day." She put the phone to her ear. "Hi, dad."

"Hi, sweetheart, how are you?"

"I'm okay. There's a little bit of drama going down in the coffee house right now with Eric's roommates, but I'm good. What about you? You're not working too hard, are you?"

"I'm fine. Look, I'm afraid this isn't a happy call."

"What's going on?"

"I have some bad news. I-"

"You're canceling your visit here in June, aren't you? I knew it! I knew you'd pick work. You always do. Well, you know what, dad, the next time-"

"Angela," he broke in, "Angela, no, it's not work. Our visit is still on for next month."

"It is?"

"I swear."

"Then what's the bad news."

"Do you remember Aunt Lois? She's your grandmother's sister who-"

"She's the one who always has candy canes in her purse no matter what time of year it is, right?"

Alvin laughed into the phone. "Yes, that's Lois. Anyway, she got my number from your grandmother's address book."

"Why did she need to reach you?"

"It's about your grandmother."

Angela sat up a little straighter. "What about Nan?"

"She died, sweetheart."

"What? But that's not possible. I-I just talked to her the other night. We're supposed to have dinner on Thursday and she wanted me to bring Eric so she could meet him. What happened?"

"They think it was her heart. Lois was picking her up so they could go out to breakfast before church and when she didn't answer the door Lois went to check on her. Nan was still in bed. She didn't suffer," he reassured his daughter. "It happened in her sleep."

"Um…okay. Okay. Thanks for calling."

"Angela if you want to talk we can-"

"Not now."

"All right. I'll call you the second I know what the arrangements are. You just make sure you call me if do you feel like talking. I don't care what time it is. You hear me? That's an order."

"I love you, daddy."

"I love you, too."

She dropped the phone into her lap. Eric was now beside her on the couch. His arm was around her shoulders and he was watching her closely. He wasn't the only one staring. The call seemed to have derailed Jack and Rachel's argument and all of her friends seemed to be waiting for an explanation.

"Your grandmother," Eric questioned, his voice laced with sympathy.

"Yeah. She-uh-she's…she died. My dad said they think it was a heart attack in her sleep. Her sister found her."

"Aunt Lois with the candy canes?"

She nodded. "Yeah, Aunt Lois with the candy canes."

"I'm sorry, Angela," Topanga spoke up. "She was a really sweet person. She always made sure to have rocky road ice cream in the freezer just in case I was sleeping over."

"She had a wicked sense of humor, too," Shawn chimed in. "I remember if she thought I was sitting too close to you on the couch she'd throw a handful of catnip towards me and then for the rest of the night I'd be fending off…what was her cat's name?"

"Sushi," she answered, remembering the old gray and white cat that would occasionally sleep in her bed.

"Right. She used Sushi and his claws to get me out." He laughed a genuine laugh for the first time in a long time when thinking about him and Angela. "That was creative and hilarious."

The rest of the group said a collective apology and Angela hated being the center of attention. She especially hated having people pity or feel bad for her. "Thanks, guys, but I'm fine." She gathered her books and stood. "I'm going to head back to the dorm and clear my head. I think I just need to be alone right now." She vacated the area before anyone else could say a word.

"Jack, can you-"

He waved Eric off. "Go. I can handle things until the next person comes in."

/

"Angela, it's me," Eric said when his knock went unanswered. After several seconds went by he was about to test his luck and see if she left the door unlocked, but then it opened. He thought she made a quick escape to avoid crying in front of everyone, but she wasn't crying now. She looked…dazed maybe? "Can I come in?" She walked away from the door and sat down on her bed. "Are you okay?"

Just hearing those words made her tense. Was there a more hated question? "I think. I don't know." Angela thought about how long it had been since she saw Nan- last summer, not long after graduation. How many times had she called and asked her to visit only to be blown off? Countless. What kind of person does that to their own grandmother? "She wanted to tell me something. Every time she called that's what she said, that there was something she had to tell me. It was important."

Eric tried to wrap his arms around her, but she resisted. "Ang-"

"I could've taken a half hour, an hour out of my life to visit and see what she wanted. Hell, you offered to drive me more than once."

"You had your reasons for not doing that."

For the first time she felt tears stinging her eyes. "Excuses maybe."

"You can't blame yourself." He tried to hug her again. This time she didn't fight it. "You didn't know this was going to happen."

"Maybe not, but now I'll never know what she wanted to tell me."


	26. Chapter 26

"Mom, how come you're not going to Atlantic City?"

Amy moved around the kitchen, bouncing a fussy Joshua on her shoulder. "Because, honey, I've decided after twenty some odd years of mother's days I wanted to spend one doing absolutely nothing. If that means kicking everyone else out of the house for the weekend- so be it."

"That and you hate grandma."

"Eric, I do not hate your grandmother! She's just…she's…eccentric."

"Fancy way of saying hate."

"I hate how unpredictable she is. That's all. How many times did she show up to celebrate Christmas on New Year's Day when you were little? Or tell you kids she only celebrated "half birthdays" as a way to justify it when she forgot the actual day? Didn't that bother you?"

"It got me an extra day of presents. And she said the half birthday thing was so she didn't age as fast as everyone else. Both of those reasons sound cool and spontaneous, like grandma."

"As you get older you'll learn that spontaneous and unpredictable can be fun, but you need stability. You need to be able to trust a person. That's one thing dad has never had with grandma. He loves her because she's his mother and she can be a lot of fun, but he can't rely on her for anything."

"Hey, she's got a condo now, not just the Winnebago. Maybe she's mellowing."

"I guess time will tell."

"Well, don't worry, mom, you and dad aren't spontaneous or unpredictable at all," he said with a smile.

"I'm going to go ahead and take that as a compliment." She sighed as the baby continued to fuss. "Do me a favor and hold Josh while I eat something. If he isn't in someone's arms he will scream."

Eric took the baby from his mom. "I don't know, little brother, is that true? Are you a crybaby or is she just spreading rumors?" Josh fussed and squirmed in his arms. He lifted him over his head and made funny faces. It only seemed to make things worse. "I'm trying to be on your side, buddy, but you're not helping."

"How is Angela doing," Amy asked over the whining.

"She hasn't wanted to talk much. When she does she blames herself for not going to see her grandmother sooner."

"Poor thing."

"I told her not to blame herself. Her family's messed up. It was a complicated situation. I don't know if there was a right way to handle it. I want to help her more, but she's not making it easy. That's kind of why I'm here." He shifted the baby in his lap. "I didn't catch Feeny at school and I need to ask him something about these flowers Angela wants to bring to the wake. They might as well be invisible because they are impossible to find. But if I can get the flowers I think it will help her. I thought he might know where I could get them."

"Keep doing what you're doing, honey, flowers or no flowers. Like I told you before, don't discount the value of being there for someone and being their safe place. I'm sure you're doing more for Angela than you realize, even if it's just standing beside her."

"Or giving her someone to yell at," he asked, as he flashed back to this morning. He had asked Angela how she was and had her usual breakfast waiting at the counter in the Student Union. She snapped and told him to stop hovering. A few minutes later she came back and apologized, but it was still unusual.

"That can help, too. Grief isn't always rational. People can lash out against those closest to them."

"Why? I'd think that would be the time to raise hell against your enemies. It's perfect because who would blame you? No one, because of the grief."

She smiled and shook her head. "I think the reason people can meltdown on someone they care about is, again, because it's safe. They know, at least on a subconscious level, the person will forgive their erratic behavior."

"I guess that makes sense in a twisted way."

"Just be sure to-" Amy jumped when the back door flew open.

"I can't believe you're trying to call shotgun for Friday," Morgan ranted to Cory, who was right behind her. "That's still a couple days away."

"It counts. You know the rules: first one to call shotgun gets it."

"It does not! You have to call it that day!"

"Nope, those rules were never established. Besides, I'm an adult. I'm not going to be cramped in the back of the van with a baby. Plus my legs are longer than yours. So there." He stuck out his tongue. "I win."

"Mom!"

"Is this argument happening? You are too old for this."

"Yeah, Morgan," Cory said.

"Is that why you volunteered to pick up your sister for me? I thought you were just being nice."

"I was, but-"

"Ha-ha." Morgan laughed and pointed in her brother's face. "You're so busted."

"Knock it off or I'll tell your father to strap you both to the luggage rack. And he won't even ask me why. Let's see how easy it is for you two to argue when you're flying down the highway at fifty miles an hour."

"Sorry," Cory and Morgan mumbled in unison, both of them staring at their shoes.

"See, Josh," Eric began, "if you don't quit being a crybaby you'll end up like them instead of a cool guy like me. You don't want that, do you?"

"Hey!"

"You're cool?"

Before he could respond he saw Mr. Feeny through the kitchen window. "Feeny! Gotta go." He dropped the baby into Cory's arms and headed for the door.

"Oh, Eric, can you ask Angela something for me?"

"What is it, Weasel?"

"I have a poem that's due a week from Monday and I wanted her to help me with it. I got an A on the last one she gave me a hand on and this is supposed to be a big part of my grade for English."

"I can't promise she'll say yes because she's going through a lot since her grandma died, but I'll ask her for you."

"Thanks."

/

"Feeny!"

George turned around and saw Eric waving. "Yes?"

"Are you busy?"

He set his briefcase by the back door. "Not at the moment, no."

"You know flower people right?"

"Flower people?"

"Yeah, other people who plant stuff in their yards or sell flowers or whatever the hell else it is you do with them."

George took a seat. "Eric, if you need something just ask."

"Angela wants to bring a certain flower to her grandmother's service. Lily of the Valley, I think she called them. They were her grandmother's favorite. But they're hard to find and crazy expensive."

"Lily of the Valley is one of the most expensive flowers in the world. They're in season for such a short amount of time. It's May, so that improves the chances of finding them slightly, but she'd have to compete with people who want them in their floral arrangements for weddings."

"Not being able to find them is putting her about this close to the edge," he said, his thumb and index finger practically touching. "So I was hoping that you knew a guy who could score me some lilies."

"Like a floral black market?"

He hit his mentor's arm. "Exactly! But make sure it's nothing illegal," he added, leaning in so no one else could hear them even though there was no one else around. "We can't go to jail. I'm sure the food sucks. Plus we've both got girlfriends now and they would miss us."

He rolled his eyes before he answered, "I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks, Feeny. I really appreciate it."

"How is Angela doing?" He intended to talk to her at some point during the past couple days, but it seemed lately she was the last one in the door before class began and the first to slip away when it was over.

"She feels guilty. Her grandmother wanted her to visit for months but Angela kept putting her off. It's complicated family stuff with her mother. It's just a big mess. Anyway, she finally agreed to go over for dinner and then this happens."

"That is unfortunate." George had vague memories of Angela showing up to enroll at John Adams High in the last months of her junior year. It was an uncommon time to get a new student, though not unheard of when dealing with military families. She'd been accompanied by her father and grandmother and was pleasant until George inquired about her mother. Angela gave some sarcastic remark and appeared disinterested after that. "And now I presume she will have to see her mother at the service?"

"No, that's one thing working in her favor. Her Aunt Lois arranged for Angela to have an hour or two to herself before everyone else shows up."

"That was nice of her aunt."

"Yeah. To be honest I'm a little nervous. I think I've only been to two funerals. Well, maybe one. Do I count Jack and Shawn's dad? Because that was more of a roast."

He nodded. Chet Hunter's sendoff was much like the man himself- loud, boisterous, and one of a kind. It was memorable, that was for sure. How many funerals have the cops called because a few family members showed up drunk and started a bonfire in the parking lot? "What makes you nervous?"

"The death part. I've been pretty lucky. I haven't lost anyone close to me. When I was ten, my mom's cousin died. I remember I had to get dressed up and go. Right when we got there Nana Boo Boo dragged me and Cory up to the front and made us look. She said he looked like he was asleep. And yeah, he did, but for weeks after that we would panic if we saw someone sleeping because we were afraid they were really dead."

"Oh, yes, I remember. That was about the time I had to take down my hammock and give up naps out here or run the risk of you two prying my eyes open or dropping water balloons on me from the tree house."

"Sorry about that. If it makes you feel better we did it to everyone. Boy, were mom and dad pissed. Especially since Morgan was a baby and we kept checking her, too."

"Eric, the main thing to remember about wakes and funerals is that these services aren't for the people who have passed on. Not really. They're for the ones left behind."

"So do what I can to help Angela?"

"That's where I was going, yes."

"I'm just afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing and making it worse."

"I don't believe you need to worry about that, but if you're ever in doubt- simply hold her hand."

"Hold her hand? That's it?"

"Hold her hand. Give her a hug. Do whatever she needs to get through the day in one piece."

"So no pressure on me then," he joked.

"You'll do fine. When is the wake?"

"Thursday afternoon."

"Then I'd better get on the phone with my flower people," George said as he stood. "I only have a couple days to track down the illusive lilies."

"Remember, nothing illegal. Neither one of us can afford to go to jail. You're too old and I'm too pretty."

/

/

Shawn wandered down the halls toward his dorm, going over everything the economics professor had covered today. The countdown was on for the end of the semester and while he was ninety-eight percent sure he wasn't coming back in the fall, he didn't want to flunk any classes. He would owe Jack's stepdad for the classes anyway and it would be extra humiliating to pay to fail. As he rounded the corner he saw Angela outside of her dorm. He briefly considered walking away. They hadn't talked much since Jack and Rachel's disastrous dinner party. That night reminded Shawn of a part of himself he hated, an inner demon he wanted to forget existed. It was easier to avoid Angela than it was to face what he did.

"Damn it." Angela's books slipped from her arm and fell to the floor with a thud, narrowly avoiding her foot. "Stupid lock." She kicked the door in frustration.

"I'm pretty sure the school operates on a strict, 'you break it, you buy it,' policy."

She spun around and saw Shawn standing there. "Topanga and I have been asking since we came back from winter break for this lock to be fixed. It's getting ridiculous. I think I'm going to go straight to Dean Bolander. We helped hook her up with Mr. Feeny. If you look at it that way she kind of owes us. I'll collect that favor for the lock." She was confused when he laughed. "What?"

"Nothing, That sounds like Eric's brand of logic talking. Weird to hear it coming out of your mouth, that's all."

"Yeah, well if you look past the delivery, Eric's logic makes sense a lot of the time."

"If you say so," he bristled. His heart twisted in his chest when he noticed the shirt Angela wore under her favorite oversized cardigan. The 76ers tee was knotted at the hip to prevent it from looking like a dress and obviously didn't belong to her. Or maybe it did now. They never hit the 'stealing his clothes' milestone, though he'd always wanted to. He craved the intimacy the gesture seemed to suggest. Sure, he let her borrow his jacket when it was chilly, but he always took it back at the end of the night. He had to. He only had the one.

"Shawn, what do you want?"

He crouched down, picked up her books, and placed them in her arms. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay." He fiddled with the key and after a minute the door finally opened. "Ha! And people thought all those years of having to sneak into places were a waste, huh?" She didn't laugh at his joke. "Here." He handed over the key.

"Thanks."

He followed her into the dorm, but stayed on Topanga's side. "How are you doing after…well, you know."

"I'm fine."

"You sure?"

She slammed her books down onto her desk. "Do you remember how much you hated these questions after Chet died?"

Shawn turned towards the door. "Okay I get it. I'll go."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

"Eh, it's not like I didn't have a few cheap shots coming my way. Don't worry about it."

"I hadn't seen Nan in almost a year. Now she's dead and I'll never get the chance again."

"I get it. I didn't see Chet for a long time before he blew into town just long enough to drop dead on me."

"Yeah, but you had no control over Chet and where he was. That was his doing. Nan called and asked me to visit all the time. I put her off. That's on me. I have to live with that."

"Why didn't you want to see her? I thought you two had a good relationship." He then remembered Nan was her maternal grandmother. "Does it have anything to do with your mom?"

Angela crossed her arms. "It's complicated."

"We used to be able to talk about anything," he said when she didn't elaborate. "I could tell you stuff even Cory wouldn't understand."

"It's not my fault that stopped."

"I know. Still…if you need someone to talk to-"

"I have someone to talk to."

"-someone else to talk to, I mean, someone to understand…" he trailed off.

She was quiet. After everything that had happened between them could she really trust Shawn again, even as a friend? That remained to be seen. She'd dealt with his ever changing moods and drama for too long to believe it would be this easy. "I'll let you know. But thanks."

He offered her a half-hearted smile that he was sure in no way looked genuine. But it was all he had to give right now. "I guess I'll see you around."

"Hey, my geology class let out early so I grabbed lunch so we could hang-" Eric froze when he saw Shawn standing in the room. "Hey. What-uh-what's going on?"

Shawn jumped. "Nothing! I just…I was-"

"My arms were full of books and the stupid key jammed in the lock again," Angela answered. "He got the door open because if it was up to me I would've kicked it down."

"I think the school would charge you for that," he said.

"That's what I told her."

"You know what you should do," he said as squeezed past Shawn and put the food on the desk, "you should just go to the dean. We hooked her up with Feeny. That's got to count for a favor somewhere. Yeah, there are more fun things to ask for than a lock, but you and Topanga need a door that works." Angela laughed. "What?"

"I said the same thing a little while ago."

"You know it's an invasion of privacy to read my thoughts."

"Before you even have the thought?"

"Especially before I have the thought! That makes it super invasion-y." He frowned, knowing that wasn't right. "Invasionist. What the hell am I trying to say?"

"Invasive," Shawn replied, trying to keep the exasperation out of his voice.

He snapped his fingers. "That's the word."

"I'm going to go. I have to be at the photography studio in a little bit so…" he trailed off.

"Thanks again for getting the door open," she said.

He nodded. "Yeah."

"You okay," Eric asked after he was gone.

She lay back on her bed. "I'm as okay as I get lately."

"You should eat something. You'll feel better."

"Nan was an executive chef. I see food and I think of her."

"But it's fast food and that hardly counts as real food."

"I don't know."

He held up a cup and one of the bags. "I got us curly fries and you a chocolate chip milkshake. You have to have these now. At least the burger or chicken tenders you can reheat."

She perked up slightly. "Chocolate chip milkshake?"

"Extra chocolate chips."

"Okay," she relented, sitting up. "You win. I'll have the fries and the shake."

"Cool." Eric handed them over and sat beside her on the bed.

"Did you tell Morgan I'd help her with her poem for English?"

"Yeah, I did. You know you don't have to. I told her you've got a lot going on and-"

"I don't mind. I like Morgan. I want to hang out and get to know her better. Besides, I could use the distraction."

"All right. I just didn't want you to feel like you had to." He watched quietly as Angela put what was left of her shake in the mini fridge and her fries on the nightstand before she laid down. "You okay?"

"Tired."

"Do you want me to go so you can take a nap?"

"I mean…not unless you have to."

"Nope, I don't need to take over the coffeehouse for another two hours. I'm all yours'." Angela grabbed onto his arm and pulled him down until he was lying beside her. Eric hoped that she would talk a bit more. He wanted her to open up to him about this the way they have with everything else. Instead she put the TV on and channel surfed until she came to a sitcom rerun. "Ooh, _Three's Company_. I hope it's the one with the misunderstanding."

"Isn't that every episode?" She wrapped his arm more securely around her and leaned back against his chest. "My dad called," she said a while later, as one episode ended and another began.

"Oh?"

"He knew it was a longshot, but he wasn't able to get a furlough for Nan's service. Apparently the death of a former mother-in-law doesn't rank high enough. Plus his request was very last minute and this weekend is Mother's day so lots of people put in for time off."

"I'm sorry. That sucks." He reached for her hand and held it tight. "You know you're not facing this alone, right? I'm going to be there."

"Eric, I already said that you didn't have to-"

"I want to."

Angela knew she could argue, but by this point it was safe to say she wouldn't win. Hell, she didn't want to win this one. She twisted around in his arms so they were face to face. "Thank you."

"What time do you want to leave for the funeral home tomorrow?"

"Around Two. What about your statistics class? You've been doing so well."

"I told the professor what was going on and it turns out when you're not trying to fool them with a ridiculous lie, they're cool."

"I'm sure it helps that you've been going to class, turning in homework, and passing all of your tests and quizzes for months, right?"

"Totally! Anyway, she said I'm doing well enough she doesn't think missing one class will mess me up since it's mostly review. It might be a first for me. I don't know if I've ever been in a place where I can afford to ditch class."

She smiled, happy to have something to smile about after the last few days. "That's great. Next time we'll have to make sure you miss class because of something more fun."

"Sorry, I didn't mean it to make it sound like I was happy to be missing class."

"That's okay." She sighed. "I tried calling a few more flower shops."

"And?"

"Nothing. One of them said they could special order them, but they wouldn't get here until next week and for the price they quoted I'd have to take out a loan."

"You know if you can't get the flowers it's not the end of the world."

"I know, but at least I would feel like I did something for her. I ignored her dinner invitations for months and kept our phone calls short even though she had something important to talk about. I didn't tell her what was going on with me and I certainly never asked for details of her life." She blinked furiously to keep her tears at bay. "It's a shame she was stuck with such an ungrateful brat for a granddaughter. Nan deserved better than me."

"Don't do this." He held her tight. "You can't keep beating yourself up for the past."

"So I should what, focus on the future? I don't know what your crystal ball shows, but in mine Nan is still gone."

"I just meant-"

She pulled away from him and sat up. "What does it matter anyway? Why are we even talking about this? Talking won't change anything."

"But you'll feel better."

"Oh, yeah, I feel great now."

Eric tried to remember what his mom said about people lashing out against those closest to them because it was "safe." He took a deep breath. "Tell me what the right thing is to say and I'll say it."

"Stop acting like this is something that can be fixed. You can give all the advice and pep talks you want, but it doesn't change anything." Angela lifted a photograph of her with her grandmother off of her desk. "You can't positive think Nan back to life."

"I just want to make you feel better. That's all."

"You can't. Not right now."

"Sorry, guess I screwed up."

She sat back down next to him and didn't fight it when Eric pulled her into an embrace. "You didn't. There's just this thing with you Matthews'. You've always gotta help, always gotta fix. Even when the situation can't be fixed you try. It's a damn birth defect with you people. Your family should be studied for this. You're a bunch of freaks."

"I'm sorry," he apologized, uncertain if he was saying the right thing.

"It's okay. I'll yell at your parents later."

"Get me a front row seat to that show." He smiled but she didn't smile back. "What do you want me to do now?"

"Go to work. I need to be alone. Maybe I'll study or maybe I'll wallow and cry while watching the rest of these _Three's Company_ reruns. I'm not sure yet. But I need to be alone for a little while."

"You'll eat the food I brought?"

"I'll eat something."

"If you need me-"

"I know where to find you." Angela melted against him and rested her head against his chest. "I'm sorry I snapped at you. I don't mean to act like a bitch. You're not the one I'm mad at."

Eric wanted to tell her to not be mad at herself, but worried that would start everything all over again. Instead he kissed her and left for the coffeehouse, albeit reluctantly. All he could do now was pray that Mr. Feeny came through with the flowers and that they make it through the visitation without incident. Was that too much to ask? For Angela's sake he hoped not.

/

/

"That's a pretty sweater."

Angela repeatedly ran her hands over the lavender cardigan, smoothing away wrinkles that were no longer there. "Nan crocheted it for me a few years ago."

"Wow, I knew she was a chef. I didn't know she crocheted, too."

She nodded. "Yeah, it was one of her favorite hobbies…at least before the arthritis got bad. The gray dress is okay, right," she asked, studying her reflection in the mirror. "My only black dresses are either better for a night out or seemed too casual. Although, I don't know why I'm worried. It's not like Nan is going to sit up and start criticizing my wardrobe."

Topanga was quiet, watching as Angela continued to get ready. The distance that had grown between them was never more apparent that it was in these quiet moments in their dorm. "Here, let me." She took the necklace and secured it around her friend's neck.

"Thanks."

"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you? You shouldn't go through this alone."

"I won't be alone. I have Eric. Besides, I'm only going to be there for an hour or so. That's all the time I have before other people start showing up."

"Afraid you're going to run into your mother?"

"Way to state the obvious," she muttered. "No wonder they made you valedictorian. Your knack for words is uncanny."

Her eyebrows shot up at the bite in Angela's words but she reminded herself that it was the grief talking. "I'm sorry. I'm not good with death."

"Show me someone who is."

"Touché. Still, I get tongue-tied and the wrong words come out."

"That's true. I remember the day of Chet Hunter's burial you tried to console Shawn by telling him that at least now he would always know where his dad was."

Topanga covered her face with her hands, still embarrassed by that spectacular faux pas. "See? People die and my foot goes in my mouth. It's practically a reflex."

"Maybe it's Cory rubbing off on you. After all, who says the most awkward things at the worst times more than him?"

"But he means well and you know he'd be at the funeral home, too, if you asked."

She checked the clock. It was almost time to leave. While Angela appreciated the offer of support, they'd been drifting apart for months. In fact, to her it often felt like she and Eric had become their own little island and existed just outside the lives of their so-called friends. She wasn't sure how to fix it, but she knew the time to try wasn't at her grandmother's funeral. "I can't deal with other people right now. It's nothing personal against you, Cory, or anyone but this is how I'm handling it. I'm trying to make peace with how I left things with Nan. All I want to do is make it through today. A crowd of people around won't help me."

"Okay," Topanga relented. She was being petty. Today wasn't about her or their friendship. "But if you need something, all you have to do is ask."

"I know."

"And the gray dress looks nice."

"Really?" Angela smoothed it out once more. "You think?"

She smiled. "Nan would approve."

/

/

"Oh, Eric! Good, I'm glad I caught you." He was afraid he'd missed him and Angela, but then he spotted Eric pacing in the courtyard.

"Cutting it a little close there, Feeny," he lectured.

"Pardon me, but I just spent part of the morning at the warehouse of a major courier company to intercept an international delivery of Lily of the Valley before the rest of the mid-Atlantic region got their hands on them."

His eyes were wide. "Are you serious? You didn't actually break any laws, did you? I was just kidding about the black market stuff. I'm too pretty to go to jail!"

"Eric, be serious. There was nothing illegal involved. I talked to some florists I knew and they let me know when the deliveries usually came in. Then I talked to a former student who is now a supervisor at the courier company." George held out a small bouquet. "It's not much, but I was able to secure-"

"You got my flowers?"

They turned around and saw Angela in the doorway. "Hey, I didn't want to get your hopes up in case things fell through, but-"

"You got my flowers," she repeated, not quite believing what she was seeing. She'd resigned herself to not finding Nan's beloved blooms and letting her down. "I can't believe it." By the time she was standing in front of the two men she was fighting back tears. "Thank you."

George hadn't expected the hug and froze. "Oh, you-you're welcome. But it was Eric really."

"Don't be so modest, Feeny. Yeah, it was my idea, but you made it happen. He risked the floral mafia and everything."

Angela pulled away and wiped her eyes, careful not to ruin her make-up. "Floral mafia? Mr. Feeny, what is he talking about?"

"I haven't the faintest idea. I'm only sorry I couldn't get a larger arrangement."

"No, this is perfect. You don't know how much I appreciate this. How much do I owe you?"

George shook his head. "You don't owe me a dime. I'm just glad I could help." He placed the bouquet in her hands. "I am sorry about your grandmother. If you need to talk my door is always open."

"Thank you, Mr. Feeny." The moment they were alone Angela turned her attention to her boyfriend. "I can't believe you."

"What?"

"Why did you do this?" She held up the flowers. "How did you do it?"

"Anyone else would've done the same thing."

"No, most people would've found replacement flowers or shown up empty handed. Most people don't get their teachers to stalk a FedEx or UPS warehouse to pounce on a flower delivery."

"Hey, that was Feeny. I just asked if he knew a flower guy."

"Still, you asked."

Eric wrapped his arms around her waist. "I care about you and I hate to see you beat yourself up for stuff that's not your fault. I thought if I could get the flowers maybe it would help a little."

"You were wrong."

He deflated just a bit, but tried not to let it show. "Sure, I mean it was dumb to think that flowers would fix anything. Your grandmother is still-" He was cut off when she kissed him. "I don't get it," he said when they separated several seconds later.

"The flowers don't help a little. They help a lot." She stared at the delicate white bulbs. "If anything they're proof that I'm really not facing this alone. I have someone who cares about me enough to…" She wasn't sure how to put her feelings into words. "…well international trade laws may have been broken. That says it all."

"Enough fawning over Feeny. I'm getting a little jealous here," he teased. "What about me?"

Angela kissed him once more. "Thank you," she whispered, more serious than before. "Just…thank you."

"You're welcome." He brushed a few pieces of hair out of her face. "Are you ready to go?"

"I'm more ready than I was before."

/

/

"Angela!"

Eric did all he could not to wince as Angela's nails dug into his arm as a woman approached them in the vestibule of the funeral home. "Aunt Lois," he guessed.

"Yes." She took a deep breath and steeled herself for the meeting. It had been a long time since she had seen her great-aunt, longer than it had been since she last saw Nan. Was it the Christmas before she graduated high school? No, she spent that with her dad. Easter? Yes, it had been Easter. "Hi, Aunt Lois." Angela was not surprised at all to be engulfed in a tight hug. Aunt Lois had always been a big hugger.

"Oh, look at you. How old are you now, nineteen?"

"I will be next month, yes."

"So grown up," she said as she held Angela's hand. "You are the spitting image of your grandmother when she was a young woman."

"I am?"

Lois smiled. "Yes. There are plenty of pictures in the-in the chapel." She reached for tissues in her purse.

"Are you okay? How are you holding up?"

"I'm fine. I think it's finally starting to hit me that this is real and permanent, you know? My baby sister isn't playing the world's meanest prank on me."

"I'm sorry."

"I am, too. Your Nan told me about your upcoming dinner. She was excited."

Angela realized that the dinner was supposed to have taken place today. She felt sick. "She was?"

"Yes. She was so proud of you going to college to pursue your dreams of being a writer. She bragged about you constantly to whomever would listen. She missed you like crazy, but-"

"I missed her, too," she said softly, trying to keep her voice neutral. She leaned into Eric when she felt his hand on the small of her back. "I didn't mean for so much time to pass."

"Honey, don't blame yourself. She didn't. College is your priority. She understood that. Still, she was looking forward to dinner and meeting your young man. I'm guessing that's you," Lois said, pointing at Eric.

"Hi, I'm Eric Matthews." He didn't have a free to extend so he offered up the flowers instead.

She gasped. "You found Lily of the Valley? Even I gave up and told the florist to go with sweet peas."

"Eric got them."

"I had a little help."

"Still, you kept trying after I threw in the towel."

"Any man that can conjure up rare flowers is a keeper. Be sure to hang onto him."

"I intend to," Angela said with a smile.

Lois checked the time. "I will leave you alone to have some time in the chapel. No one else should be arriving for another hour and a half or so. I was very clear that this time was yours'."

"I appreciate it."

"If you need anything I will be around either finalizing some things with the funeral director or getting some air in the parking lot."

"Thank you, Aunt Lois."

"You're welcome."

/

When Angela released his hand upon entering the chapel, Eric decided to stay a few steps behind. Far enough away to give her privacy but close enough to be there if she needed him. Instead he took the opportunity to study the pictures. Lois was right. Angela bore a great resemblance to her grandmother. It seemed Nan lived quite a full life and always had a smile on her face. She looked like a fun person. He couldn't help but laugh when he spotted Sgt. Moore in one of the photographs sporting a mustache. He would have to tease him about that the next time they saw each other.

"Eric?"

Angela was now sitting in the front row of chairs, tissues clenched in her hand. He put the picture down and went to sit beside her. "How are you holding up?"

"I wish you were meeting her at dinner tonight instead of like this."

"Me, too." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "If the pictures are anything to go by she looked like a cool lady. What was her name?"

"Claudia. Claudia Iris Bell."

"That's pretty." Eric noticed that the bouquet they brought was now resting with her. "It's a good name, nicer than Grandma Bernice's name. She's always hated it. It's probably bad I can't remember Nana Boo Boo's real name, right? I think it's Myra. Or is it Myrna? It's one of those." He realized he was rambling and that Angela wasn't paying him any attention. He kissed her cheek. "Sorry."

He wasn't sure how long they sat there. Most of it was spent silently holding hands, but occasionally Angela would tell a story about Nan and no matter how it started they ended up laughing. To him it was a good sign.

"I suppose we should go," she said eventually. "Just let me say good-bye."

"Want me to go up there with you?"

"Thanks, but no. This…this is between me and Nan."

"Okay."

A few minutes later they were walking hand in hand to the back of the chapel. When they were passing the piano Angela couldn't help but reach out and run her free hand along the edge. The moment she realized what she was doing she recoiled, moving away as if the instrument would bite.

"What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "I don't know why I did that. I haven't touched a piano in years."

"It's natural. Seeing all the pictures probably reminded you of-" He was cut off by a commotion in the vestibule.

_"No! You are not supposed to be here yet. I promised Angela."_

_"But, she's my mother! You can't keep me from her."_

"What's going on," Eric asked. She didn't answer. She just kept walking. "Angela?"

"Mom?"

"Angela, hello. I-uh-I didn't realize that you would still be here."

It never occurred to her that she would see her mother, not really. She believed, given the circumstances, the woman would want to avoid conflict. That they would run into each other never crossed Angela's mind as a legitimate possibility.

"I-I'm sorry." She cleared her throat. "But it's my mother and I-"

"Mothers? Like you care so much about mothers?"

"June bug, please."

She flinched at the mention of her childhood moniker and in that moment any grief she felt morphed into white, hot rage directed at the woman who gave her life. "Don't call me that! You lost the right to cutesy nicknames the minute you walked out on me."

"Camille," a man called out as he came through the front door. "Camille, I found your sheet music under the passenger seat." He instantly picked up on the tension in the room. "Is everything okay?"

"Fine, Byron," she responded, her voice strangled. "Everything is fine."

"You-uh…you must be Angela," he said. "I've heard a lot about you."

Angela didn't hear him. Instead she was focused on the two children, a boy and a girl, he held by their hands. There was no mistaking who they were. The resemblance was too strong. She wasn't an only child after all.

"Mommy, I saw a ladybug outside and it was just like the ones on my sweater that Nannie made!"

"That's _my_ ladybug sweater. Nan made that for me for picture day in kindergarten." She thought it was packed away with stuff her dad saved. "What is she doing with it?"

"I saw it at Nannie's house and mommy said I could have it," the girl answered, oblivious to the drama around her.

"It's my sweater."

Camille crouched down in front of her daughter. "I bet it was a pretty ladybug that you saw, Mercy." She could feel Angela's eyes burning a hole into her back but couldn't bring herself to look at her. "Can you do me a favor? Can you and your brother go sit on the couch over there and look at your books so the grownups can finish talking?"

"But I'm eight," the boy spoke up. "I'm not a baby."

"Spencer, just do what I-"

"Eight?!" Angela tried to do the math in her head, but admittedly she was a little off her game. "What, you left me and dad and turned around and started a new family right away?"

Eric put his hands on her waist. "Angela, wait."

"Why should I?"

"They're children," he said quietly. "They didn't do anything wrong."

"She took my sweater. It's mine. I want it back." She stared at…Mercy? Is that what they called her? "Give me my sweater."

"Come on, kids," Lois interrupted, "I have some candy canes in my purse for you." She took their hands and led them away.

"Look, Angela," Camille began, her voice wavering, "I understand you're angry with me. You have every right to be, but please don't-"

"You're giving me permission to hate you for abandoning me? Seriously? How magnanimous of you! Well, you don't have to worry, _mom_ , I don't hate you. I nothing you."

"You nothing…what does that mean?"

"As far as I'm concerned you may as well be in the casket with Nan because you're as dead as she is." Her mother reacted as though she had been dealt a physical blow and Angela wanted to be unaffected, but she could feel the tears stinging her eyes. Still, she refused to show an ounce of weakness to the woman. "Let's go, Eric," she said before bolting out the door.

He caught up with her in the parking lot. She was leaning against his car, staring at the cloudless sky. The innocence on her face rivaled that of the five year old they just met. Her sister, he supposed. "Angela…"

"She's got kids."


	27. Chapter 27

"So why can't I use your car while you're in New York? You and Rachel are taking the train up there. It's not like you're going to need it."

"The last time I lent you my car you hit a pothole the size of Alaska and wrecked the suspension."

"I got it fixed. Uncle Mike even gave you the family discount."

"Yeah, when are you paying me back for that, by the way?" Normally Jack didn't hold Shawn responsible for money owed. Maybe it was because he grew up privileged while his brother was in the trailer park, but he never expected to be paid back any money loaned out. But this was different. Shawn did serious damage to his car. "Family discount or not, fixing a suspension isn't cheap."

"Is it all about money to you? That's typical. I said I'll pay you back and I will. In fact…" Shawn dug into his pockets and took out any cash and spare change he had and dumped it onto the counter. "Let's see…$19.38 and half a pack of Jolly Ranchers. How far will that get me in your world?"

"Are you seriously throwing a fit because I won't-" Anything else Jack was about to say was cut off when the door opened and Eric walked in. He had a backpack over his shoulder and a duffel bag in hand. "Hey. What's with the luggage?"

"Angela's staying here this weekend. I know wakes and funerals aren't happy, fun things, but this was a disaster."

"Right, her grandmother's service was today. How did it go?"

"Didn't you hear me, Jackie? Disaster. Disasters are bad."

"What does that mean?"

Eric loosened his tie with his free hand and headed for the stairs. "It's Angela's business to share, not mine. I'm going to go check on her…make sure she's all right. You guys haven't seen or heard her, have you?"

"No, man, I didn't even know she was here."

"All right."

"What do you think that's about," he questioned Shawn once Eric was gone.

"I don't know." It had to be big for Eric to be acting as serious as he was. If he had to make a guess, he'd say something happened that was related to her mother. Shawn ran his hands through his hair. "Look, about the car-"

"It's fine. Borrow it. Whatever. We'll work out a payment plan for your previous damage."

He slid the candy across the counter. "Do you accept Jolly Ranchers?"

/

"Angela?" Eric knocked once before he opened the door. "Are you…" He nearly tripped over her heels as he walked further into the room. "…what are you doing?" Instead of curled up and crying, like he expected to find, she was sitting in the middle of his bed and wearing his pajamas. "You're watching TV…bad TV."

"Is that a crime?"

"No, but…Jerry Springer? Seriously?"

"There's nothing like watching exes argue over her not wanting to give him back his prosthetic leg to make you feel better about your life."

"I don't even know…wait a minute, there are enough couples to make a whole episode?"

"All I can say is that there are at least three couples like that out there."

"Okay, my new goal in life is making sure we don't become dysfunctional enough for this show." He stared at the screen for several seconds before it became too much. "I got the stuff from your dorm: your books and notes to study and enough clothes for the weekend."

She hadn't mentioned staying here with him, at least not for the entire weekend, but the thought of going back to the dorms held no appeal. As long as she stayed in this room nothing bad could happen to her. "Thank you."

"No problem. I scared the hell out of Topanga when she came back from class and found me in the room."

"What did you tell her?" She shut off the television and shifted around to face him.

"Nothing. I just said you were staying with me and needed your stuff. She's not stupid and guessed that something was wrong, but I didn't say anything."

Angela nodded. That explained the two phone calls from her friend that she let go unanswered.

"She asked me how you were but that was hard to answer because even I don't know. You haven't much of anything since we left the funeral home." He dropped her bags onto a chair and took a seat on the bed. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine."

"Fine," he repeated, disbelief evident in his voice. "You're sure?"

"Yeah, you know I've been thinking about it and I've decided to just be okay with this and live my life."

"How the hell does that work?"

"It's like when you first found out about my past and my mother or when you learned that Shawn got drunk and pushed me."

He unconsciously clenched his fists when she mentioned the latter situation. He still hasn't forgiven Shawn for it and it took quite the effort to remain civil. But he did so for Angela's sake. "How?"

"You wanted to do something but I said no, the situations weren't new, they were new to you. That's what my mother's life is. Her marriage and her chil…and her children obviously aren't new. They're just new to me."

"Yeah, but it's a little bit different than me finding out that-"

"No," she interrupted. "It's not different. I'm not going to obsess over something I can't change and has nothing to do with me."

"Angela, it's your mother. Not some random woman. She has a lot to do with you. And you have a little brother and sister out there that you didn't-"

"Will you shut the hell up?! You think I don't know who they are?" She got out of bed and moved to the window. Even from three floors up she could see people going about their daily lives. Did they know what it was like to have the entire world turned upside down on them? "That boy has my eyes. The shape, the color…those are my eyes…my mother's eyes. And-and the little girl…that's me. Right down to my ladybug sweater that she stole. That's me. That's me all over." She wiped furiously at her tears, not wanting to waste a single moment crying over these strangers. "I know exactly who they are. I don't want to talk about or focus on them. It's pointless. It's not as if anything will change."

Eric wasn't sure it was a healthy way of handling things, but he had by now learned if he pressured her to talk about something she wasn't ready to deal with she'd likely shut him out completely. Talking wouldn't happen until she was ready. "I'm trying to fix something that can't be fixed," he realized. "I'm sorry."

Angela walked back to the bed, her arms wrapped around herself. "What have I told you about apologizing for things that aren't your fault?"

"Still…you don't deserve this." He pulled her into his lap. "I'd make it all go away if I could. I would risk your wrath and fix it."

"And I'd let you play hero." She relaxed against him, accepting his embrace. "Do you think this is the important thing Nan wanted to tell me," she asked in a small voice. In the midst of all the chaos she'd almost forgotten the reason she was at the funeral home today. Instead of letting him answer, she continued to speak. "Is it wrong that I'm mad at her? I mean she…Nan's…she's gone. She can't explain or defend herself. It feels wrong to be mad, but I am."

"I don't think there's a wrong way to feel in this situation."

She shook her head. "I can't deal with any of this right now. It hurts too much."

"What do you want to do?"

"I don't want to do anything. I don't want to see or talk to anyone. I pretty much don't want to leave this room. If that's okay with you," she added, remembering that it was, after all, his room.

"You don't even have to ask. Hide out as long as you want."

"Thank you."

"Should I go?"

"What? Why?"

"You don't want to see or talk to any-"

"You are the exception to the rule. You're not just anyone."

"Thanks. Do you want me to get you something to eat?"

"No, no food. I might try to take a nap. I haven't slept much the last few days."

"That's because you've been staying in the dorms instead of here," he teased. "You can't sleep without me."

"You're joking, but that's probably the truth. I do sleep better when I'm with you." She shifted in his arms so she could see him. "And you don't have to say the same is true for you, too. You can sleep anywhere. I've witnessed it and never fail to be amazed by- and a little envious of- your sleeping skills."

"Okay, but I really like falling asleep and waking up with you."

Angela smiled before leaning forward for a kiss. "Me, too."

"Good."

"Speaking of that…would you…could you…never mind," she said.

"What is it?"

"Forget it. It's stupid."

"What?"

"I like to think that I'm strong and independent, but-"

"You are. You're one of the strongest people I've ever met."

He spoke with such conviction Angela almost bought it. However, she didn't feel very strong right now. "I've never been very good at needing someone. I don't like it. I've always tried to tough it out by myself." She found it difficult to look at him and instead focused on their hands, which were intertwined and resting on her lap. "I didn't have a choice. I didn't have people around to lean on." It was a painful truth to admit. Other people were unreliable. They failed to be there no matter what they promised. If she didn't take care of herself no one would. Even on his best days her father was often a long distance dad due to his military career. Having a heart to heart over the phone didn't compare to the times he was around. And so she was left alone to cope and handle things.

"I'm sorry about that. I want to-I mean…I'm not going anywhere. You can need me."

Angela wanted so badly to believe him. She did about 99% of the time. But others have promised to be there only to bail and drop her when the chips were down. Were things really different this time around? They had been so far, but would it last? Could she make that leap of faith? She took a deep breath before she spoke. "Would you stay with me until I fall asleep?"

"Yes." He wanted to say more, to reassure her in some way, but didn't know how. Maybe this was one of those situations where actions spoke louder than words. He heard that phrase countless times from his parents, Feeny, and other teachers. Telling her he was going to be there was pointless. It was clear she'd heard that line before. He had to prove it. "Just let me change out of this suit and I'm all yours'."

She got out of his lap and closed the blinds. "I stole your pajamas. I had to get out of the funeral clothes."

"That's okay. I like it when you wear my stuff."

"I like wearing your things, too. It's comforting."

"And here I was going to say it's hot." Eric was relieved to get a laugh out of her, even a small one. "Do you want me to read to you?"

"Gee, I'm amazed you're not offering to sing," she teased as she settled under the blanket.

"You want songs? I've got songs."

"Thanks, but I'm not in the mood to listen to you belt out Metallica or Foo Fighters." She could already see him believing _Enter Sandman_ was the perfect tune to soothe her with the rationale that it referenced going to sleep.

"Excuse me, missy, but these are original songs."

"Really?"

"Between high school and college I was bored. My friends were all away at school. I didn't have a job…nothing. It was depressing. I spent a lot of time in my robe sitting in front of the TV with a huge bowl of Cocoa Puffs. And that's when it hit me. All of those detective and spy reruns they show during the day had crimes solved by guys who were fat, old, or in wrinkly rain coats. Sometimes the guy would be all three of those. And that's when it hit me."

She snuggled into his chest and peered up at him. "What hit you?"

"What the world needed was _Eric Matthews: Good Looking Detective_. I had the whole show idea in my head. I could see it so clearly."

"How many episodes of this show do you have mapped out?"

"About three seasons worth," he figured. "I even planned a clip show."

"For when you get hurt on the job and are in a coma and you dream of all your past missions?" She smiled at the way his eyes lit up. "Please, like I don't know you well enough by now?"

Eric loved being with someone who got him. Most people didn't get him. "But the best part, at least to me, is the kick-ass theme song I invented to go with it."

"I'm guessing the theme song is about to be my lullaby?"

"Absolutely. You may want to take a minute to prepare yourself for my greatness. Ready," he asked a few seconds later.

"Let me have it."

He took a deep breath. " _When a crime breaks out all the cute girls shout-_ "

/

Eric hadn't planned on falling asleep, but one minute he was recounting various episode ideas for Angela and the next there was this annoying tapping sound. It was barely loud enough for him to hear. A few seconds later the tapping became a knock. It was followed by a whisper. He glanced down at Angela and was relieved she was still asleep. However, that wouldn't last if the knocking continued. Slowly, he untangled himself from her embrace and went to the door. There he found Jack in the hall, phone in hand. "What," he asked, stepping out of the room. "It's not a good time."

"Angela's dad is on the phone."

He stood a little straighter at the mere mention of her father. "How did he get our number?"

Jack shrugged. "I don't know, Topanga maybe? He sounds scary so I didn't quiz him. But he said he's been trying to call Angela for hours and she's not answering."

"Okay, thanks. I'll talk to him." He took the phone and stared at Jack when he didn't immediately leave. "Bye."

"What's going on? It has to be bad if her dad is calling you."

"Later, okay?" Eric shoved him down the hall before putting the phone to his ear. "Hello?"

"Is Angela all right? Lois called me and told me she saw her mother. How is she? Why isn't she answering her phone?"

"She's…all right might be a stretch but she's…hell, how do you think she's doing?"

"If I know my daughter at all I'd say she's bottling it all up inside and not saying a word."

"No, she's saying a few words, not many though."

"I want to talk to her. Put her on the phone."

"You can't right now."

"Excuse me?"

Eric shrunk back a little, almost able to picture the look on Sgt. Moore's face. "Angela's asleep. She hasn't been sleeping very well and I don't want to wake her up." Did he really just tell his girlfriend's military father that said girlfriend was sleeping in his bed and that he knew her recent sleep habits? That wasn't going to help. He may as well have sent the man a bullseye with his picture on it.

"Oh. She does need her rest. You're right. Let her sleep. Tell her to call me when she can. Today, tomorrow, I don't care if it's three in the morning. Please."

"I will." This was too easy. There had to be a catch.

"How was she when she saw Camille?"

"How do you think?"

"Right."

"Although I think it was meeting her little brother and sister that really put her over the edge."

Alvin frowned. He knew about the boy, but he was unaware his ex-wife had another daughter. Lois hadn't mentioned anything about children when she called. The only reason he even knew about Camille's son was because they'd been in the midst of laborious, long-distance divorce proceedings when her lawyer called his lawyer to inform him of her pregnancy. If they'd still been married when the child was born Alvin's name would've automatically gone onto the birth certificate and he would've been obligated to support him financially. It didn't matter that he wasn't the biological father. The way the law was set up he still would've had to pay. The baby arrived less than a month after their divorce was finalized. It never occurred to him to tell Angela about her mother's new child. Why cause her that pain? "Just do one thing for me."

Here was the catch, he was sure of it. "What's that?"

"Take care of my daughter."

That wasn't what Eric had been expecting. "I will, sir. You don't have to worry about that. I swear."

"Thank you."

He stared at the phone in his hand. The entire call felt so surreal he wasn't sure it had actually happened. He popped his head back into his room and saw that Angela was still asleep. She hadn't moved a muscle. Not wanting to wake her, he decided to go out to the living room. Maybe he'd get some studying out of the way. It wouldn't hurt to be a little extra prepared.

/

"I was thinking that Saturday night we could sneak away from my family and I could take you to one of the famed New York restaurants," Jack suggested. It was obvious Rachel still wasn't happy with him springing this trip on her, but he was determined to fix it. "What do you think? We could go to Gray's Papaya if you want some killer hot dogs or if you want something fancier I'll take you to Keen's Steakhouse. My stepdad knows someone so getting a reservation wouldn't be an issue."

"Rach, you make sure he pays. Go big, Tavern on the Green big. Angela and I walked past it on our first date as part of our _Ghostbusters_ theme, but we couldn't afford to go in."

"Maybe." She glanced up from her books when Eric came into the room. "How's Angela?"

"She's sleeping, which is good. She hasn't slept much since she found out about her Nan."

"So what happened? Why all the secrecy? What was so bad that Angela wants to hide out here? I don't have a problem with it, but it's weird. What's up?"

Eric sighed. He hadn't said anything earlier because Shawn was here and he didn't want it getting back to Cory and Topanga until Angela was ready to talk to them. But as much as he could usually trust Jack and Rachel to be discreet, this wasn't his story to tell. "If she wants people to know, you'll find out then."

Angela stood in the hallway, just outside the common area of the apartment. She did eavesdrop for a few moments, curious to see what Eric's explanation would be. It was a relief to reaffirm she could trust him. She wasn't ready to discuss it yet. It would only get her pity and the 'Poor Angela' faces she hated so much. "Hey," she said, finally making her presence known. She immediately joined Eric on the couch. "Guess I actually slept for a few hours, huh?"

"We both did. I thought you'd be out longer."

"Strange dreams," was her only explanation. It wasn't a lie, but she didn't want to admit that the main reason she woke up was because Eric was no longer in bed with her, at least not in front of his roommates. "I might take you up on your offer for food though."

"I'll order a pizza. Pepperoni, right?"

"And green peppers."

"Right, you're a weirdo who likes to add vegetables to perfectly good pizza," he teased and nudged her side with his elbow.

"It balances out the pepperoni."

"Whatever you say."

"Watch it or else I'll trade in the green peppers for mushrooms."

Eric made a gagging noise. "Okay, green peppers for the win." He glanced across the room. For a moment he forgot they weren't alone. "You guys want anything? My treat."

"No thanks. We ate already." Jack couldn't help but watch the couple occupying the red couch. It was hard to look away. They seemed to be in sync and completely focused on the other when together. Did he and Rachel ever give off that vibe of intimacy?

"We've actually got to get going," Rachel said. "We're going to be late." She gathered her books and placed them into her backpack.

"Where are you guys going? Fun date," Eric hoped. Things between his roommates had been tense lately.

"I have study group for linear algebra. It's the only way I'm going to pass this class. We're supposed to meet at the campus library in twenty minutes."

"And I'm filling in for April doing inventory at the coffee house."

"Right. I forgot that was tonight. Have fun."

"Are they okay," Angela asked a few minutes later when it was just the two of them again.

"Pizza will be here in about twenty minutes," he said as he sat back down on the couch. "Rachel's still upset about New York. I don't know what her problem is. Who wouldn't love an expense paid weekend to one of the most famous cities in the world?"

"He didn't ask her first. Plus she has to spend the weekend with his family that she doesn't know. That's a lot of pressure on her."

"But how is that any different than me planning our first date and keeping it a surprise for you? Or the road trip to see your dad? I didn't talk to you about any of that ahead of time."

"You didn't spring our first date on me out of the blue. I may not have known where we were going, but I knew we were doing something. We had established that much. As for taking me to see my dad…it's a different situation."

Eric was skeptical. "He wanted to do a nice thing. He knew Rachel was bummed about not being able to see her mom. He thought spending the weekend with his family would be a fun distraction."

"He dropped this huge relationship milestone on her head that clearly she didn't feel ready for. And he wasn't even the one to tell her. She heard it from his mother."

"All right, yes, that makes it awkward but I still think he was trying to do something nice."

"His heart may have been in the right place but he didn't think it through."

"Does that mean surprises are bad? I can't surprise you anymore? I have to hint around to make sure you'd be okay with whatever I wanted to do?"

"I love your surprises. You know that."

"I'm having trouble seeing the difference between my surprises and what Jack did."

"I think it comes down to knowing your partner and what they're comfortable with."

"The whole communication thing?"

"Basically," she said, reaching for his hand. "That's why it's so important that we keep talking. I want us to be comfortable enough to talk about anything. I haven't always been so good at the talking thing. I'm still not great at it."

"What do you mean? We talk all the time about everything."

"I know, but that's because I'm working hard at it. Talking about feelings and emotions is not something that comes easy for me. But I think we have something special here-"

"So do I."

"-and I don't want to screw it up because of a communication failure."

"It's okay to not be good at talking. I'm great at talking. I even do it in my sleep so it's impossible to shut me up."

"One person doing the talking is just as bad as no one talking."

"You've got writing. You're great at that."

"Thank you, but what does that have to do with this?"

"Writing is communicating, right? If there's something you don't know how to say you can always write it down. I'll read it. I'll even write back if you want."

"Wow."

"What?"

"You're batting a thousand at knowing what to say."

"I'd like to think it will last, but we both know you should enjoy it while you can."

"I hate it when you're so self-deprecating." She wrapped her arms around his midsection and laid her head on his chest. "Give yourself more credit."

"Bad habits die hard." He ran his hands along her back. "Are you falling asleep," he said, feeling her relax under his touch. "We can always reheat the pizza."

"I'm not sleeping. I'm thinking."

"About what?"

"Today was one of the worst days of my life but you've made it bearable. I wouldn't have been able to handle it without you, you know?" She leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss on his lips. "Thank you for being here. Thank you for wanting to be."

"You don't have to thank me. It's just like we say: it's the best part of us, knowing someone's there. Otherwise what's the point?"

She found herself at a loss for words. It was a lot to take in. Instead of trying to find the right thing to say she simply held him tighter.

/

Angela awoke with a start. She sat up and almost immediately recognized she was at Eric's. She felt more at home here than in her dorm lately. After taking a few sips from a water bottle she'd left on the nightstand, she got up and paced, trying to erase the dream from her mind. She was in a room full of people she knew. Only no one seemed to recognize her, the most disturbing one being her father. Unlike everyone else who denied knowing her, he looked right through her. It didn't matter how much she begged and pleaded with him to see her. He didn't. It was as if she didn't exist to him.

She supposed she could blame their conversation this evening. After they ate Eric told her about her dad's call. It seemed like he was hiding something, though she couldn't put her finger on what it was. After the day from hell with her mother the thought that her dad might be keeping a secret was almost too scary to think about.

The only thing that kept it from being a true nightmare was the parrot. Angela wasn't sure what to make of it, but whenever the bird opened his mouth Mr. Feeny's voice came out.

She was on her way back from the bathroom when Eric called out to her. "I'm fine. Go back to sleep." He said something else, but she couldn't make it out. "What?" When he didn't respond she walked to the bed and realized that Eric wasn't talking to her, not really. He was talking in his sleep. That wasn't uncommon. He did it at least a few times a week. Heck, sometimes she'd talk back just to see where the conversation would go. A few weeks ago she heard snippets of how he surfed in a volcano. He, of course, remembered none of this in the morning. She sat on the bed and waited for him to say something else. A few seconds later he said her name again.

'Was it a good dream,' she wondered. Judging by the faint smile on his face and a few other mumbles and noises he was making, she'd say so. Angela laid next him and he seemed to sense her immediately. He turned to face her before he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close. She grinned to herself. ' _Yes, it was a very good dream._ '

She was torn between letting him sleep and needing the security of his presence. Here he was dreaming about her while she'd had a nightmare where no one knew her. Angela pondered the significance of that. Surely it meant something, right? It had to.

"Hi."

His whispered greeting startled her. "Hi."

"You okay?"

"I'm fine."

"Liar," he said, running a hand along her cheek.

"Just a bad dream, that's all."

"Was I there?"

"No, actually. You weren't."

"That's why it sucked, huh?"

"That must be it. But I'm okay now. I'm going to try to go back to sleep."

"Good. Sleep is good. You don't gotta be scared because I'm here. I'm like gum on the bottom of your shoe: stuck forever."

She did her best not to laugh. Was he trying to make her smile by saying something silly or was he still half asleep? It was difficult to tell. "I like the sound of that."

"Goodnight kiss? So this way you'll dream of me."

"Sounds good." The kiss was slow at first, chaste even, but it wasn't long before he drew her closer to deepen it. Angela sighed as he boldly ran his hands along her body. They've never been shy with each other, but with his guard down he was even more confident than normal. It was a huge turn-on.

It was her cold hands along his ribcage that alerted Eric to the fact that he wasn't having the most vivid, amazing dream ever. This was real. Angela was in his bed. He was holding her, kissing her, and neither of them seemed in a hurry to stop. He realized she was pressed right against him and tried to shift away. "Sorry. I should go take care of-" He was surprised when she swung a leg across his hips and straddled his lap. "Um…"

"What were you dreaming about?"

He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. "Angela, I really don't want to-"

"Why not?"

"It's embarrassing."

She tried not to squirm as he moved beneath her. "Do you remember who you're talking to? We own embarrassing. We embrace it. I already know you were dreaming about me because you were saying my name."

"I was?"

"Over and over," she said with a smile. "So spill."

Eric momentarily covered his eyes. "Okay. It was about us. We were…we were…doing stuff."

"Sex stuff?

"Getting there, yeah."

"That's not so embarrassing."

"We were on the pool table in the Student Union."

Her eyebrows shot up. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"Was it hot," she pondered, unable to help herself.

"Duh, it's us." Her body shook with laughter and caused him to inhale sharply. ' _Cold shower_ ,' his mind screamed. "Of course it was hot."

"Then what?"

"Then-then this. You. Us. Here. Now."

"Sorry I woke you up?"

"Never." It had become difficult to think. Angela was a very tactile person and if she wasn't peppering kisses to his face and neck she touched wherever she could reach: his arms, his chest, and running her fingers through his hair. It was almost sensory overload. "We have to slow down."

"What if we didn't?"

His eyes popped open at her statement. "What?"

"What if we didn't slow down? What then?"

"Then we'd be-we'd…"

Angela nodded. "Right."

He was sure he'd kick himself later for what he was about to say, but he had to know. "Are you sure? You had a long day, a bad day, and-"

"This isn't about what happened today or me being vulnerable. It's about you and me in the here and now." Yes, today had been a bad day for her, but it also was important for them as a couple. He'd shown yet again that he would be there for her, baggage and all. It didn't scare him. He didn't run away. If anything it seemed he was more committed.

Eric took her hands and held them against his chest. "I just don't want you to regret anything tomorrow."

"Impossible," she whispered. She leaned down and pressed her mouth against his. "I know what I want." She twisted her body to the side and reached for his nightstand, fumbling for the drawer. It wasn't long before she found the box of condoms that was stashed inside. "You."


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short (for me) little chapter. It's mostly lighthearted, a little levity for the couple before the drama kicks up again.

A blaring car horn jolted Eric awake. He had no idea what day it was, what time it was, or how long he'd been asleep. The sun was out, but that was about all he had. Still, as he gazed at Angela, asleep and curled into his side, he realized he had nothing to complain about. There were definitely worse ways to wake up. Now there was the question of what he did now. Did he make breakfast? Lay here and wait for her to wake up and see what she wants to do? He wasn't sure. He'd never been in this exact situation before.

"Could you turn that down?"

"What?"

Angela's eyes remained closed as she draped an arm across Eric's abdomen. "Turn down the T.V." She pressed a kiss to his shoulder. "Please."

"Sorry, it's not me. It's some idiot outside."

"I hate them. How about you throw something out the window to make them stop?"

He chuckled. "From three floors up? What if it hit them? I think that's called murder."

"You wouldn't kill for me?"

"Of course I would. But then I'd have to go on the run and we'd never see each other. Not worth it."

"I'd run with you." She opened her eyes and smiled at him. "You, me, and the open road." It was a dream she's had a few times: the two of them in his car and just driving, no particular destination in mind and no one around for miles. "It's perfect."

"I do like the sound of that. And if you can find a way to do it without murder…." He trailed a finger down her arm. "Plus finals are next week. Between murder and going on the run there'd be no time to study."

"You have a point. You've been working so hard lately. Not to mention my dad would be pissed if I blew my scholarships."

"Please don't mention your dad. I don't want to think about him. Not now."

"Why not?"

"We're in bed and did a hell of a lot more than sleep. Your dad is not the mental image I need right now. He'd kill me."

"Sorry."

"That's okay. So last night was…something."

"Yeah, it was."

"Any regrets," he asked, hesitant. Sure, she said last night she wanted it to happen, but he had lingering doubt in the light of day. Was she sorry?

"How can you even ask that? Especially after all we've talked about."

"Yesterday was awful. I don't know how I would cope if I was hit with the stuff you were. I get it if you wanted a distraction and-"

She sat up and looked at him. "You are _not_ a distraction. Fine, yesterday sucked. It sucked more than any other day has ever sucked in the history of sucky days. But what happened was about us. If anything I'm surer than ever about where this is going. Yesterday was bad, but you-you made it better…or at least not as soul crushing as it would've been if I had to face it alone. You've been there every step of the way and I never had to ask." She clutched his hands. "That says a lot. It shows I can depend on you in a way I didn't think I'd ever be able to trust another person again." She made sure she was looking into his eyes as she spoke. "Yesterday reaffirmed us. So, no, I have no regrets about last night. None. Zero. Okay?"

Eric laughed quietly before answering. "Okay, I got it. Loud and clear."

"Good. Now what about you?"

"What about me?"

"Any regrets?"

"Are you kidding? It didn't happen the way I thought it would, but-"

"How did you think it was going to happen?"

"I don't know. I guess I figured we be on a date, maybe at the club dancing and making out-"

"That sounds like my idea of a good time."

"And at some point you'd let me know that it was the night."

She raised her eyebrows. "Really? That's it?"

"I don't need an elaborate set up. Just you."

"That's sweet." Angela leaned up to kiss him, but stopped halfway there. "I don't suppose you have any gum or mints you can get without us leaving this bed, do you? We did just wake up."

"I don't think I…oh, wait!" Eric leaned over her and reached for the nightstand. "Just a second. I thought I put them in here. Ah-ha! Here you go."

She stared at the plastic square he dropped in her hand. "What am I supposed to do with this?"

"It's mouthwash, silly. Dad got them in at the store recently. They're new, but getting popular. Take a strip out," he demonstrated as he explained the process, "let it dissolve on your tongue, and boom! Instant minty freshness."

"Huh," she said a minute later. "That's cool."

"Now I'm pretty sure you were about to kiss me, right?"

"That was the general idea, yes." She wrapped her arms around his neck and succeeded in getting her kiss. She thought about taking things further, but stopped herself. Still, there was no harm in indulging for a couple of minutes. "You know, it didn't happen the way I thought it would either."

Eric was flabbergasted that she was able to go from making out to rational conversation in the blink of an eye. How did girls do that? "How-um…how did you think it would happen?"

"I'm not sure. I suppose similar to what you thought. We'd be on a date, come back here, and well…you know. I was even prepared just in case."

"Of course we were prepared. I've had the condoms in my nightstand for a while."

"No, that's not what I mean. I…I bought…" She covered her eyes. "Even now I can't believe I did it. I felt so silly."

"What did you do?"

She peeked at him from in-between her fingers. "I bought lingerie."

He smirked, just a little bit. "You did?"

"I've never done that just so you know. I've never bought lingerie specifically to wear for a guy."

"You didn't have to do that."

"I know. I wanted to."

"I'm flattered."

"It's more cute-sexy and closer to pajamas than the stuff they show in a Victoria's Secret catalog."

"I wouldn't know," he said, lying through his teeth. "I've never looked at those myself."

She rolled her eyes. "Do I need to remind you I helped you clean this room however many months ago so you'd have a proper environment to study in? Along with the folded laundry and dishes was a healthy stack of Playboys and Victoria's Secret catalogs. Are you going to tell me they came with the apartment?"

"I-uh-"

"Please. I know better than to be threatened by a magazine. In fact it's pretty much a given in my mind that every guy has a secret stash of his preferred magazines or porn hidden someplace. You're no different."

"Man, you're cool."

"I don't know about that," she said with a laugh.

"Trust me. So tell me more about these cute-sexy, lingerie pajamas you bought to wear just for me."

"You'll see them eventually."

"Mean." He pouted. "That's what you are."

"What if I told you the lingerie is here?"

"What?"

"I hid it right after we had our talk."

"Here, like in my room here?"

"Yes. Am I mean now?" His eyes scanned every corner of the room. "Don't bother looking. You won't find it."

"You've gone from mean to evil."

"Onwards and upwards." She hooked her arm through his and laid her head on his shoulder. "I think I'm glad it happened the way it did. It was spontaneous. Plus this way you didn't have a chance to freak yourself out ahead of time."

"What do you mean?"

"You were worried about feeling all this pressure so our first time wouldn't be a failure. That wasn't an issue given how it happened."

Little snippets of last night came back to him in flashes. How many times did she have to tell him to get off of her hair? Was it two? Three? What if-

"Hey, what are you doing?" Angela sat up and held his face in her hands, forcing him to look at her. "You're not freaking out now, are you?"

"Uh….yeah!"

"Why? I'm not complaining."

"Yeah, but your hair and I-"

"Okay, you leaned on my hair a couple of times. I accidentally elbowed you in the ribs. We'll call it even."

"But I-"

"Besides, the first time is the freebie, remember?"

"That doesn't help. I don't want to have the excuse of freebie. That implies bad."

"It does not! Last night was not bad. But it was a learning experience for the both of us."

"See, _learning experience_ is also not good to hear."

"If it makes you feel better I'll cover all of this in the detailed report I plan to write up."

"Report?"

"Yeah, you know, cover the highlights and stuff that needs improvement. I'll grade each category on a scale of 1-5." She tried in vain not to laugh at the look on his face. Horrified was the only word to describe it. "Or you could realize that I'm kidding." He remained silent. "Don't tell me you're mad." The longer he was quiet the harder she laughed. "Eric, come on."

"Is there a level beyond evil, because you just soared right to it."

"I was joking."

"Joking means something's funny. And right now you're very much not funny."

"I'm sorry." Angela pouted and stuck her bottom lip out for maximum effect. "Anything I can do to make it up to you?"

Eric grabbed her hand pulled her flush against him. "I can think of a few things…."

/

/

"Cory, don't you think you're being a tad overdramatic?"

"Just a tad?" Jack watched his brother's best friends from behind the counter in the Student Union. Cory had Topanga wrapped in a bear hug and wouldn't let go. His display made Eric look like a master of subtlety. Secretly, he wondered where the dramatic tendencies came from in the Matthews' family- Amy or Alan. For some reason he wanted to say Alan, though he didn't know why. "Your standards are higher than mine, Topanga."

"Please, would you want to be stuck on this road trip?"

"Honey, it's an hour and a half drive, tops. That's hardly a road trip. It's going to take me longer to get to Hershey."

"Yeah, but you won't be stuck in a van with moody Morgan and a colicky baby."

"You'd rather ride with Aunt Pru?"

Cory shivered. Her aunt had always been critical of their relationship and of Topanga's parents for supporting it. She claimed they were much too young to be as serious as they were and legitimately believed her niece made a grave error by turning down Yale for a high school romance. He hasn't seen the woman since they got engaged and according to Topanga her reaction was not one of support. "No. Your Aunt Prudence scares the hell out of me."

"That's what I thought."

"What if we-"

"Cory, no, I want to see my mother and it's been ages since I saw Precious Pearl. After what happened with Angela's grandmother I'm not going to take a chance and just assume we have all the time in the world for future visits."

He couldn't fault her for that. Grandma Bernice wasn't his favorite person, but Angela losing her grandmother so abruptly had altered his attitude towards seeing her again. He was determined to accept Bernice for who she was- a fun person who loved him, but also free spirit who changed direction at whim. Though maybe Eric was right, maybe the fact that she got a condo and doesn't live out of her Winnebago anymore was a sign she's mellowing. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too." She smiled before leaning in for a kiss. "I'll bring you chocolate."

"You'd better." He kissed her once more. "I love you. How much chocolate will you bring me?"

"Cory, you're stalling. Go meet your dad." She pushed him towards the door. "I love you and you will survive."

"Lots of chocolate," he stated as he headed outside. "I mean it."

Topanga walked back to the couch, laughing and shaking her head as she went. "It's nice to know I'll be missed," she remarked to Jack as he brought over the coffee she ordered. "Looking forward to the weekend in New York?"

"Kind of. It'll be great to see my parents and sister again and they are really looking forward to meeting Rachel, but she's barely talking to me." He hesitated before sitting down. It wasn't as if he and Topanga were close. They were friendly, but he wouldn't call them friends. "You're a girl."

"Um…yes? Is that a question or a statement?"

"I don't have many friends who are girls. Rachel was but then…well, we are where we are now. I'm trying to get to know Angela better but she's been understandably wrapped up in her own stuff lately. And then there's you-"

"Jack, what do you want?"

He ran his hands over his face. If Shawn were here he'd say he was 'Corying this up spectacularly.' "I'm sorry. I need a girl's point of view. Why is Rachel so mad? What did I do wrong?"

"You dropped this big thing on her without even asking. You made a huge assumption."

"I've tried to apologize and she says she's getting over it, but she still acts pissed."

"It's probably nerves. How would you be reacting if, instead of getting on the train to New York this afternoon, you were going to get on a plane and fly to Texas to meet her family?"

"I'd probably be trying to come up with a very contagious illness that made getting onto a plane impossible," he admitted.

"Right."

"So you think Rachel's got her head buried in a medical dictionary trying to think up a way to get out of this?"

"Probably not, but I'm sure she's tempted."

"How do I make it better?"

"I'm not sure, but I'd start with listening to her, not just what she says but non-verbal cues and body language."

"Great," he sighed, "now I have to be a mind reader?"

"No, you don't have to be a mind reader. You just have to listen." She checked the time. "Sorry, but my aunt will be here any minute. I told her I'd meet her out front."

"Sorry, didn't mean to keep you."

"That's okay. Do you want me to bring you chocolate, too," she asked.

"No, I mean…well, if you have extra." He took his wallet out of his pocket. "Here, money for chocolate for me, Rachel, and Shawn, too."

Topanga accepted the cash with a smile. "I already included Shawn in my Cory budget."

He laughed to himself. "Of course you did. Well, have a nice weekend." She was almost out the door before he called out to her again. "Oh, one more thing: did you give Angela's dad the apartment number?"

She nodded. "He tried Angela's cell so many times and she wasn't answering, which it's weird for her to ignore his calls. He got worried and called me and demanded the number."

"And he sounded so scary you coughed it up?"

"Yes. It's killing me not knowing what's going on. Did you see her at all? How is she doing? She hasn't returned my calls. I tried to ask Eric when he came by to get her stuff, but he wouldn't say what happened. All he said was it was a disaster."

"Yeah, disaster is pretty much all I got out of Eric, too. I saw Angela for about five minutes last night, but it was like me and Rachel weren't in the room."

"Hopefully she just needs the weekend to process and will be ready to open up soon. She's my best friend and I can't help her when she shuts herself off from everyone." Topanga looked at the clock again. "Okay, now I really have to go. I still have to get my suitcase from my room. I'll see you Monday."

/

/

"Hey, don't take off all the pepperoni and add it to your plate. Leave some for me."

"I'm leaving you the green peppers." Eric was relieved she felt like eating. Angela had only taken one piece of pizza last night and didn't finish it.

"That's because you don't like them."

"I like them just fine, but I think healthy food on pizza is pointless. If you're going to do something unhealthy you should do it right."

Angela leaned across the bed and retrieved some pepperoni slices from his plate. "And I say adding in a vegetable every now and then will keep you from needing cholesterol medication before you hit thirty."

"Okay, you win," he relented. "I'll eat the peppers."

"Thank you."

They ate and watched TV in amiable silence for a while. During a commercial break he put the television on mute. "Can I ask you something about last night?"

"You can ask me anything, but I already told you I have no complaints, not about last night or what happened a little while ago," she said with a grin. "And I know you hate when I call it a learning experience, but it is. And practice definitely makes perfect."

"Then we're going to practice a lot, but it's not about that."

"Okay, then what's your question?"

"Did I say I was gum on the bottom of your shoe?"

She burst out laughing. "I forgot about that. Yes, you did. Sort of."

"Why?"

"I had a bad dream. You said I didn't have to be scared because you were with me, like gum on the bottom of my shoe: stuck forever."

"Wow, I'm pretty smooth when I'm half asleep."

"No guy has ever said that to me before, I'll give you that. But it was very sweet."

"What did you dream about?"

"Do we have to talk about that?" She drew her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. "I don't remember the whole thing."

"We don't have to," he said as he removed the pizza box and plates and put them on his desk. "But if you want to talk…" He sat back down on the bed. "I'm a good audience."

"No one knew me."

"Who didn't know you?"

"I was in a room, a ballroom maybe or a banquet hall, and it was full of people- seemingly every person I'd ever met was there."

"Not me," he reminded her. He remembered that little detail.

"Everyone but you, yes. And I was walking around, trying to figure out what was happening, but no one knew who I was. They acted like I was a stranger. Maybe that's not right. Mr. Feeny, he knew who I was."

"Feeny made your dream and I didn't?"

"Although it wasn't quite Mr. Feeny," she said quietly, almost to herself. "His voice came out whenever the parrot spoke. Was it a just bird or Mr. Feeny disguised as one?"

"There was a parrot in your dream and the parrot was Mr. Feeny? Am I following this right?"

"Yes."

"What did parrot Feeny say?"

"I don't remember. I just know he sounded like Mr. Feeny. That wasn't the worst part. The worst was my dad."

"What kind of bird was he, a crow?"

"No, he was himself, but he couldn't see me." Angela rested her chin on her knee. "At least with everyone else, even if they didn't know me they saw me. I was acknowledged. But to my dad I was invisible. I was pleading with him, practically screaming in his face, and it was no use."

Eric scooted closer to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault. But when I came back to bed and realized you were dreaming about me-"

He groaned and covered his eyes. "Do we have to talk about that? It's bad enough I told you what was really going on."

"And what, if you were more awake you would've lied to me?"

"Not lied, but made it a bit sweeter than us going at it on the pool table. Now you know how dirty my mind really is."

"I don't want you to censor yourself. But what I was going to say is that when I realized you were dreaming about me it made me feel better. Here I was feeling forgotten and then my boyfriend is so crazy about me I'm the star of his dreams? It was nice to know someone was thinking about me, even if it was in an impure manner," she teased.

"Can we change the subject please?"

"Sure. When is our anniversary?"

He didn't see that one coming. "What?"

"I was in class the other day listening to Cory and Topanga talk about some anniversary or another, the first time they played hopscotch at recess…something weird and random like that. They were impossible to tune out. But it made me think about us. Is our anniversary the day we made out at my dad's, when we got together, or our first date?"

"I never really thought about it," he admitted. "If I had to pick I'd say the day we decided we wanted to be together. That's when it felt real for me."

She nodded. That's what she had been thinking as well.

"I wish I remembered the date we first ran into each other at the museum," he continued. "I don't want to be like Cory and Topanga and celebrate every tiny thing. It makes the big things feel less special if you make just as big a deal out of the first time you shared an order of fries as you do for a six month or one year anniversary. But that would be a cool one to celebrate."

"January eighth." Angela smiled. "I saved the ticket stub from the exhibit."

"You did?"

"I save all of my ticket stubs, but that one went into a special box. Now it's in my Eric box."

"An Eric box, huh?" He wondered what else this box contained.

"Yeah."

"And you knew from that first night?"

"God, no," she admitted with a laugh. "No, I didn't see us coming. But it was a memorable evening and I didn't want to forget it."

Eric moved away from her, just a little bit. He was almost ashamed to admit this. "You have no idea how close I came to running in the other direction when I saw you."

"Why?"

"I was there to escape. I needed to relax and not worry about other people. I didn't know if I could be myself around you. That seems so weird to me now because you're the one I feel most like myself with." He didn't want to think about what his life would be like if he had gone in the other direction. "It's crazy how doing one little thing changed everything in my life."

Angela was having similar thoughts. What would've happened had he not approached her that night? "I'm glad you didn't run away."

"Me, too."


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted chapters 28 and 29 at the same time. (Just in case, like me, you automatically go to the newest chapter.) I hit an editing stride and was able to get more done in one night than I thought. :-)

"Okay, one more question," Angela muttered. "Then I take a break." She opened the practice test book for physics to a random page. _"The color of an opaque object is the same as the light that is…"_ She scanned the possible answers. "Oh! _C, reflected_." After double checking her answers, she decided she had more than earned her break.

Eric had gone for his shift at the Student Union a few hours ago, and she felt a little weird being here alone. She suspected that wouldn't be the case if he lived by himself, but this was Jack and Rachel's home, too, and she didn't want to accidentally eat their food or overstep a boundary. Would they be okay with her here by herself? Eric insisted it was fine, but she still wondered.

Angela was in the middle of raiding Eric's shelf in the fridge when her phone rang. Her father said he'd call today. "Hi, dad."

"Angela?"

"Who is this?"

"It's Aunt Lois, honey."

"Oh…hi."

"I got your number from your Nan's address book. I hope that's all right. If it's a bad time or-"

"It's fine. I just thought you were my dad calling to check in." She abandoned the food and went to sit in the living room. "How are you?"

"I'm all right. It's been an emotional week."

"I'm sorry I ran out of the funeral home."

"That's okay. I understand. I want to apologize for your mother."

"No, Aunt Lois, you don't have to-"

"Yes, I do. That was supposed to be your time with your grandmother. Camille knew that. I don't know why she couldn't listen for once."

"Who knows why she does anything that she does?" Angela sighed, feeling agitated at the mentions of her mother. Still, she didn't want to take it out on her great aunt. "Is there a reason you were calling?"

"Aside from apologizing I wanted to give you the information for the cemetery if you'd like to visit when you're ready."

"Sure. Just let me-let me get something to write on." She looked around and took the very first piece of paper she saw. "Go on."

"She's interred at Glenwood Memorial Gardens in Broomall. Do you need me to give you directions?"

"I can look it up."

"Okay. I'll let you go. I'm sure you have a busy, fun-fill Saturday planned with your boyfriend. Eric, right?"

"Yes, his name is Eric. But really, you're not bothering me. Eric's at work until tonight and I'm studying for finals."

"Then I will let you get back to your studies."

"Wait, can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Before she died Nan told me that she had something important to talk to me about. She never told me what it was, just that it was important we talk. I put it off because I never imagined that she would…that she…that she wouldn't be around to tell me herself." Angela took a deep breath. "Do you know what it was? Was it about my mother?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know. She never mentioned anything to me. Whenever she spoke of you it was to brag. She was very proud of you. She missed you, but understood you had your own life."

Tears stung her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. "Oh."

"I wish I could help you more."

"It's not your fault." She wiped away the few tears that escaped. "I suppose I deserve it for not coming to visit for so long."

"The only thing you deserve is to be happy. Nan would want it that way. She wouldn't want you to torture yourself for the rest of your life."

"Okay," she whispered.

"Sometime in the next few weeks I'm going to start sifting through her belongings. I haven't seen it yet, but she did have a will and has itemized who will get certain items. You can meet me at the house one day and select some things you'd like to have that she hasn't left anyone."

"Can I have her Bundt cake pans?" So many special occasions were celebrated with Nan's Bundt cakes. Every year on her birthday Angela got a special one made just for her, a different flavor every time. She couldn't help but wonder what kind of cake Nan would've made her this year.

"You can have whatever you want. Like I said, we can choose a day once your finals are completed. And I swear to you, it will be just us."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. I'll let you get back to your books. Feel free to call me if you want to talk. I don't want us to be strangers."

"I don't want that either."

"Good. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye."

Angela set the phone down before resting her head in her hands. She'd hoped Lois would know what Nan had wanted to say. And regardless of what her aunt told her, it was a punishment. She was such an awful granddaughter, blaming her grandmother for her mother's sins. What else did she deserve except the torture of never knowing? Food was no longer appealing and she decided to go back to Eric's room. Just as she was getting comfortable her phone rang again. She had to put the thing on silent. "Dad, hi, look this isn't a good time. Can I call you-"

"Angela, it's me."

She froze. "Mom?"

"Hi."

"How did you get my number? Did you go through Nan's address book, too?"

"I hit *69 on Aunt Lois's phone."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"I'm going to be in town for a couple more days. I'd like to see you before I go back to Atlanta."

"No. It's not happening."

"We should talk. I want to explain what happened all those years ago. Tomorrow is Mother's day and I-"

Angela laughed. It was either that or cry. "Mother's day? You think I give a damn about Mother's day? I haven't had a reason to celebrate since I was nine. Do you know what it's like to see all the greeting cards and be bombarded by ads about treating mom to a special brunch?" Her mother was silent. "Dad would always write my teachers a note, excluding me from having to make some shitty craft with the rest of the class. And since we traveled so much I had to deal with questions from new people every year about where my mom was. Do you know what that feels like?"

"I still have the clay heart you made for me when you were in kindergarten."

When she closed her eyes she could see that little heart. It had been a thrill to give her mommy something she made with her own hands. She was so excited she ran full force to give it to her. Unfortunately, being five and a bit clumsy, she tripped and the heart slipped from her grasp, splitting in two when it hit the ground. She cried, sobbed really, over that broken heart. After soothing tears and fixing a skinned knee, Camille took out the crazy glue. She said it was the best gift she had ever gotten, crack and all. "I bet it comes in handy when there's a wobbly table leg to stabilize."

"Don't do this."

"I didn't."

"I know," Camille said softly.

"I don't want your apologies or your excuses. I want nothing from you. So go, go back to Atlanta with your real kids and forget all about me. It shouldn't be that difficult. You seem to be an expert at forgetting when it comes to me."

"I've never forgotten you, June Bug."

"I told you not to call me that!"

"I'm sorry. If you ever change your mind and want to hear my side of the story-"

"Don't hold your breath."

/

/

Eric checked his watch. He was only halfway through with his shift. How was time moving so slowly when it was this busy? There was a lull right now, but students had been in and out all morning, getting a caffeine fix to help fuel their finals cramming. Heck, he'd seen some people more than once today already. He wondered if he looked as frazzled when he was studying. It was nice to not feel as nervous for once. He was fairly confident he'd do well on next week's exams. Maybe he wouldn't be pulling in A's, but there would some B's in there.

He looked up from the dishwasher just as Shawn strolled in. They made eye contact briefly before he rerouted his course and headed for a table near the door. Eric sighed. He was the only one working and couldn't very well ignore him, could he? It figured he showed up during a slow point. Where were all the people when he needed them? He couldn't even pretend to be too busy to see Shawn, Angela wanted him to be civil, though after everything he's learned he wasn't sure how that was supposed to happen. Still, Eric knew he needed to try, for Angela. Before he could give it another thought, he grabbed the order pad and a pen. "What do you want?"

Shawn hadn't expected Eric to be bold enough to approach him. They'd more or less been avoiding each other since he and Angela got together, even more so since Jack and Rachel's dinner party from hell. The only consolation Shawn had was that Eric didn't look thrilled to be waiting on him. "That's okay. I'll wait."

"You'll be waiting a while then. No one else is here until two."

He rolled his eyes and considered his options. He had to be at the photography studio soon. This was a pit stop. "Fine. Get me a large coffee and are there any of those breakfast sandwiches left? The ones where it's after twelve so they're half off?"

"There's a couple, yeah."

"I'll take two of those."

"Okay."

"To go," Shawn added.

"I'm not begging you to stay." Eric was halfway back to the counter when he turned back around and went to Shawn's table, taking a seat. "This is getting a little old."

"If you mean the breakfast sandwiches fine, I'll take a couple doughnuts instead."

"Not the food. This," he said, gesturing between them. "Us."

"What are you getting at?"

"We should call a truce."

"Are you kidding me? You swooped in and made a move on the only girl I've ever loved and you want to call a truce?"

"I didn't swoop in and-" He shook his head. "Whatever. I'm not asking for me or even you. Frankly, ever since that dumb dinner party it's taking all my self-control to not pound the crap out of you."

Shawn wanted to be mad, but he still hated himself for putting his hands on Angela. If he found out someone else had done it there would be a jail cell and charges involved once he got done with the guy. "Okay, and?"

"We're thrown together a hell of a lot. Your best friend is Cory and mine is Jack. We go to the same school and see each other all of the time. I don't think it's possible for us to completely avoid each other. Plus Angela's been dealing with a lot of crap lately and I don't want to add to it by having her worry about us."

"What's going on with Angela?"

"Stuff."

"Come on, don't be so vague."

"It's not my news to tell."

"It's bad though, right? Something happened at her grandmother's service? You called it a disaster. Something with her mom?"

"If Angela wants people to know then she'll say something."

Loyalty had always been one of Eric's finer attributes. If you were important to him he had your back. That remained constant no matter how crazy he acted. Though Shawn wouldn't call dating a friend's ex loyal behavior, Angela deserved the steadfast support. "So what is this truce?"

"It's simple. When it's just the two of us we can ignore each other for all I care, but when the others are around I think we can manage to be polite."

"The same way you'd treat a stranger?"

"If that's how you want to look at it, fine."

"Yeah, whatever," he said after thinking it over for a minute.

Eric nodded. "Good."

"Could you get my food before I'm late for work?"

"Sure." He got up and headed for the counter.

"Oh, Eric, I'm glad you're here. Do you have a minute?"

"Sure, Dean. What's going on?"

"Do you have time to stop by my office on Tuesday?"

Eric went over his schedule in his head. "I have finals, but I should be free after four."

"That's perfect. I will see you at four fifteen."

"What is it about?"

"I'd really rather discuss this in private."

He frowned. What did that mean? "Um…okay. Is something wrong?"

"I'll see you on Tuesday."

"But-"

"I'm sorry, I have to go. I'm already running late for my conference. Don't forget, Tuesday!"

She rushed out of the Student Union so fast he didn't have time to ask another question. He looked at Shawn, who saw the whole thing. "That can't be good, right?"

/

/

"I'm telling you, Carrie, this is the way to do Mother's day," Amy said into the phone. "I don't know why I didn't think of it sooner. I've got the house to myself all weekend. Last night I took a hot bath, had a glass of wine, and rented movies I wanted to watch. And I got to order takeout without input from anyone else. Today I'm going to make a batch of cookie dough. Maybe it will become cookies or maybe I'll just eat the dough. Who knows? Then I'm going to be a total hypocrite and leave the dishes until tomorrow at the very last minute." She laughed. "I know, right? When you're young you think the ideal holiday would be a romantic trip to London or Paris. Now I think the best thing is to just be left the hell alone for a few days. Even if I was in Paris I'd still be changing dirty diapers and listening to a teenager whine. I'd just be doing it with a view of the Eiffel Tower." She laughed again. "Exactly. I don't know if this will work next year but I'm definitely going to try. Talk to you later."

Just as she was heading to the kitchen to get started on her cookie dough, the doorbell rang. "Angela, hello."

"Hi. I thought I would see if Morgan wanted me to help her with that poem for her English homework. I know it's not due for a little while, but why not get it done early, right?"

"Morgan's in Atlantic City visiting her grandmother this weekend for Mother's day."

"Oh. I forgot about that." She remembered Eric saying something about Amy wanting peace and quiet at least once. "And now I'm disturbing your whole empty house thing. I'll go." She leaned against the doorframe and made no attempts to leave. "Sorry."

"You don't have to leave."

"No, it's okay. I just showed up unannounced and rang the doorbell. And this is your big weekend to yourself." Her original plan had been to keep Eric company at work, but then she worried about being in his way or worse, appearing clingy. Still, she couldn't continue to sit alone in the apartment. It wasn't until she was on the bus that she realized she was nearing the Matthews' home. She had been operating on autopilot.

"You know, having the house to yourself isn't as big a thrill as I thought."

She shook her head. "You don't have to placate me. I'm not a baby. You're a good mother who deserves to enjoy Mother's day. I don't want to get in the way of that." She turned to leave, but was stopped when Amy put a hand on her arm. "Just tell Morgan to give me a call and we can set up a time to work on her poem."

"It's too quiet here. So, really, you're saving me. I could use the company." She wrapped her arm around Angela's shoulders, relieved that she didn't pull away, and led her inside. "I've been going crazy without someone to talk to."

"Well, maybe for a few minutes."

"Good. And for the record, you are never in the way. You're welcome here anytime. You know that. Or, you should."

"Thanks." She took a seat on the couch, unsure of what to do with herself. "I appreciate that."

"I was so sorry to hear about your grandmother. How are you holding up? Are you okay?"

Tears almost immediately came to Angela's eyes. She wasn't sure if they were because of her grandmother, her conversations with her mother and Aunt Lois, or all of the above. "I-I'm okay."

Amy wasn't fooled. Not for a minute. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

"Do you want a hug?"

Angela shook her head, but leaned in and accepted the embrace anyway. It was foreign yet familiar, bringing to mind the times Camille would comfort her as a child. If she squeezed her eyes shut and concentrated hard enough, Angela swore she could smell her favorite floral scented conditioner. How long had it been since she's felt a mother's hug? One of those, _'the world is falling apart, but it's okay because I've got you'_ hugs? The gentle hand smoothing her hair and the hushed reassurances in her ear were her breaking point. Whatever remained of her stoic resolve fled. If there was such a thing as a mom hug Amy was a master.

"It's okay, sweetie." She swayed from side to side much the way she did when trying to soothe Joshua to sleep. "It's all going to be okay."

"What did I do wrong," she cried, clinging more tightly to Amy with every word. "Why didn't she want me?"

"Who?"

"My mom-she…she has k-kids. Two of them…boy and girl."

Amy had to really focus to catch the words between the sobs. It seemed she was spilling her entire life story. "I know we haven't spent much time together and I can't pretend I understand why your mother did what she did, but I know it had nothing to do with you."

Angela pulled away a little, more composed than before. She accepted the box of tissues from the coffee table and wiped her eyes. "I used to think that. All these years I told myself she left because she didn't want a family. But that's not true. She just…she just didn't want me." Fresh tears fell from her eyes. "Why wasn't I worth sticking around for?"

"You are worth it. You are. Don't ever doubt that."

"You don't even know me."

"Maybe not, but I can see the positive effect you have on the people around you, Eric especially. That tells me everything I need to know." When Angela didn't say anything, she continued. "And for the record, I would love to get to know you better. I want to."

"I'll try to work on that."

"No pressure. Are you okay," she asked, patting the younger woman's hand.

"I'll get there eventually. I always do. I don't have a choice."

Amy couldn't decide if that answer was brave or sad. "Do you want to keep talking?"

"Not really."

"Do you want to bake cookies with me?"

"What?"

"I was just about to bake a batch. Do you want to help?"

"That's okay," Angela said as she stood reluctantly. "I've ruined enough of your weekend."

"You ruined nothing. We'll call it step one in getting to know each other."

It was a little odd, but what the heck. "I guess that would be nice."

"Great. What's your favorite?"

"Cookies in general are good, but if I have to pick a favorite I suppose it would be snickerdoodles."

Amy grinned. "Mine, too. See how perfect this is? Let's go." While on their way to the kitchen Angela stopped in front of the piano. "What is it?"

"My mom taught me how to play. She's a musician and when I turned four she began to teach me. I miss it, but I haven't been able to touch one since she left. My best memories of us are wrapped up in a piano."

"If you ever change your mind…that's a good piano."

"Can we make cookies now?"

"Sure."

/

"Mom!" Eric came up path to the backyard where his mother was sitting on the bench. She'd called him earlier to tell him that Angela was here. He'd wanted to get here sooner, but had to finish his shift at the Student Union and then check on a few things at the store for his dad. "Is Angela okay?"

"She's fine. She fell asleep while we were watching a movie. I haven't checked on her in a while, but I think she's still sleeping."

He took a seat beside her. "What did she say? Why didn't she call me?"

"I think she just needed a mother's perspective."

"You're great at that, all the mom stuff. The best."

"Thank you. It's nice to hear sometimes."

"Sorry for not saying it more. I-" He stopped talking when music seeped out from the open kitchen window. The notes were stilted and quiet, giving away the rust of the musician, but he could make out enough to tell it was a song, instead of keys being hit at random. "Is that Angela?"

"There's no one in the house but her." She put her hand on Eric's arm, halting his efforts to go inside. "Don't."

"But mom, I-"

"Eric, no. She's not playing for us. It's between Angela and whatever inner demons she's fighting. In fact it's best to pretend it never happened because I don't think we're meant to hear this."

He settled back in his seat, albeit reluctantly. "Here," he said, handing an object to his mother. "Happy one day early Mother's day."

"Oh, thank you. I already said you didn't have to get me-" Her smile quickly turned to confusion. "Um, honey?"

"Yeah?"

"It's a turkey."

"I know. I made it myself."

"Not that I don't appreciate it, but why a turkey? It's not Thanksgiving."

"Yeah, but you always got excited when I brought you something I made in school and the handprint turkey was the only thing I could remember how to make. And maybe it's not Thanksgiving, but after some of the stuff I've seen lately I realize how lucky I am. I know I don't always make it easy, but thanks for being my mom."

"It's my pleasure, honey."

/

/

Tuesday afternoon Eric was sitting in the courtyard, enjoying the weather and killing a few minutes before his meeting with Dean Bolander. He had no clue what she wanted to talk about and, try as he might, would not give him any hints. It was driving him crazy.

"So, did you get it?"

He tried not to smile at Angela as she ran over to him. "Get what?"

"Don't pull a guessing game with me. You know what. Did you get the results of your statistics final yet?"

"The test was only yesterday."

"But you said you might find out your score today." She pouted and stomped her foot. "Don't hold out on me."

"Fine," he said, exhaling in a dramatic fashion as he pulled a piece of paper from his pocket, "if you're going to force me…."

Angela yanked the paper from his hand and skimmed it. "You got a B+!"

"Yep."

"And you were teasing me like that?"

"Yep."

She read the paper again. "B+…that means your final grade for the class is a B-."

"Yep."

Why was he being so nonchalant? This was big. "Can't you say anything else?"

"You're pretty?"

Angela threw her arms around him. "I knew you could do it. I'm so proud of you."

"I'm kinda proud of me, too."

"Good, you should be."

"I mean it's nothing compared to your A's, but-"

"Nope, I'm not going to let you sell yourself short, not today. You've worked too hard."

"Does that mean you're going to live up to your promise?"

"Promise?"

"You said if I got a B- in statistics you'd treat me to a date- a blood and guts zombie movie."

She hadn't forgotten, but almost hoped he had. "A promise is a promise. You earned this."

"I wouldn't have been able to do it without your help."

"Yes, you would have."

"Still." Eric pulled her close for a kiss, not caring about the other people around. "Thanks for having faith in me." He kissed her once more before moving away. "We'll definitely get back to celebrating later. I have to get to the administration building."

"Why?"

"Dean Bolander wants to see me."

"Is anything wrong?"

He shrugged. "She's probably blanking on a present idea for Feeny and wants to come to the expert."

/

"Okay, Dean, I'm here," Eric declared. "What's the big, super-secret meeting about? You want to get an early start planning something special for Feeny's birthday? I don't blame you. He's tough. Good news is we have until October to-"

"Have a seat," Lila said, gesturing to the chair in front of her desk.

He tried to shove down the feeling of impending doom that came over him. You don't sit for good news. "This is bad, isn't it? People never want you to sit down unless it's bad. When's the last time someone said, _'Sit down. I'm giving you a promotion'._ Or, _'here's the keys to your brand new car.'_ Probably never, right?" He walked over to the chair, but stood beside it instead.

"Eric, please? Sit."

"Oh, now you're saying please? Yeah...not good news for me, huh?" He hesitated momentarily before taking a seat. "Okay," he exhaled, "let me have it."

"First of all, I want to apologize for letting this fall through the cracks and because it was the college's faulty communication, we are going to work with you and allow you to choose the necessary classes even though the summer registration deadline has passed."

"What are you talking about? I'm not taking classes this summer."

"If you want to graduate as planned you will." She handed over an envelope.

"What's this?"

"It's a letter stating that you are currently short credits and if you don't take additional classes you won't graduate in the Spring of 2000."

He frowned. "What's wrong with my credits?"

"Between a failed class and dropping a class or two during your freshman and sophomore years I'm afraid, as it stands right now, you will be short credits even if you take a full course load your senior year."

Eric skimmed the year old letter. "Is this a joke?"

"I'm afraid not."

"But I don't get it. How did this happen?"

"Did you really believe there would be no consequences to failing and then not making up the credits? Or dropping a class with no fallback?"

"I don't-I don't know. I guess once classes were over I put them out of my mind." He slumped down in the chair. "Why didn't anyone warn me?"

"While I admit the lack of official mail was the fault of the school and perhaps your advisor should've called a meeting and been more proactive, ultimately your education is your responsibility. This isn't kindergarten or even high school. You're in college, Eric. It's time to be an adult."

"I'll just talk to Mr. Feeny and maybe he can-"

"George cannot fix this for you." While there were many things Lila admired about George as an educator, he seemed to have trouble knowing when to let go and let them grow...certain students anyway. There was a difference between guiding and coddling. "You have to fix it. Now obviously I and other faculty will be here for guidance, but there will be no saving."

"But my grades this year were good. Doesn't that count for anything?"

"Of course it does. You've had a very good year. It proves that when you apply yourself you can accomplish great things. And I have no doubts that if you commit to summer school you can correct your path."

All he could think about was how excited Angela was with each passing grade he received. She seemed more thrilled with his average marks than she was with her own straight A's. What was she going to think of him when she found out about this?

"You know," she continued, "I remember just a few years ago a young man barged his way into my office- two days after he blew off his scheduled interview, by the way. He sat right where you are now and said all his life people told him about his potential and everything they believed him capable of. This young man said that he finally wanted to see what that potential was, that he was tired of being scared and letting his failures define how he viewed himself. He wanted to learn and grow. He wanted to be challenged and dared me to let this university live up to its potential by accepting him."

"Do you remember all your interviews that well," he asked, eyes fixed on her name plate.

"Only the ones who truly impressed me." She offered a kind smile. "Why don't you come back in a few days to pick your summer classes?"

He nodded, still unable to look at her. This was supposed to be his last summer as...not a kid, but the last time in his life before he really had to grow up. "Yeah. I guess I better get to the Student Union, start making that extra tuition money."

"Eric," Dean Bolander called out as he reached the door. "Don't let this setback define you. Learn from it. Grow. Rise to the challenge. I know that you can."

"I'm glad one of us is sure."


End file.
